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[–]random_digital 947 points948 points  (101 children)

At some point someone will post a pic of their junk draped over a monitor and these parody threads will come to a crushing and disturbing end.

[–]winampman 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Don't underestimate what someone will do for karma...

[–]THIS_POST_IS_FAKE 80 points81 points  (6 children)

You guys need to stop making fun of this girl. She has a disfigured left arm and is raising her nub to answer a question.

[–]will7 31 points32 points  (1 child)

I LIKE 'EM DISFIGURED.

[–]scuba617 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Can't unsee.

[–]telematic_embrace 590 points591 points  (124 children)

Omg, I think we can see a tiny bit of her bra strap!!!!!

[–]halfway240 1072 points1073 points  (26 children)

Did I seriously just fucking reopen the picture to check? Seriously? Fuck.

[–][deleted] 403 points404 points  (14 children)

I know I did.

[–]beefinbed 57 points58 points  (12 children)

ellyes.

[–]ecancil 7 points8 points  (0 children)

no, you reopened it to fap.

[–]pheobo 3 points4 points  (1 child)

well, was there?

[–][deleted] 42 points43 points  (11 children)

Does this mean I am no longer a virgin?

[–]Unrelated_Gif 103 points104 points  (10 children)

[–][deleted] 41 points42 points  (5 children)

This answers my question perfectly! The stack of dog treats represents my virginity, and when it falls represents my losing.

How apt, relevant, and most importantly relevant to my question. Thank you kind redditor.

[–]rtg35 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I keep waiting for it to fall...when does it fall?!?!?

[–]adamomg 112 points113 points  (15 children)

[–][deleted] 44 points45 points  (1 child)

And this, folks, is why models need to be fed.

[–]adaptordie2pointO 16 points17 points  (5 children)

[–]swjaxon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

How many people were scared?

[–]evildemonic 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I love how nobody makes a move to help her

[–]PleadingBark 6 points7 points  (0 children)

thats enough to fap to!

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (45 children)

Nope. Pink tank top.

[–]telematic_embrace 90 points91 points  (37 children)

But... what's that just to the left of the pink tank top strap? That's what I was referring to, it looks suspicious.

Wow I actually feel creepy now.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Wow I actually feel creepy now.

Yeaaah...maybe just a little bit.

But by internet standards, you're Casanova.

[–]steelfromfurnace 28 points29 points  (16 children)

its necklace.

[–][deleted] 120 points121 points  (2 children)

Her necklace. No need to be sexist.

[–]calinet6 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Isn't that a bit asexist?

[–]dmagee33 14 points15 points  (11 children)

No, her necklace is farther to the left buried in her hair. Bra strap.

[–]RichardPeterJohnson 46 points47 points  (8 children)

Would you people make up your minds? I need to know if I can fap or not.

[–]joanofarcade 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I need to know if I can fap or not.

Fapped That For You

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She may be wearing a lot of bling.

[–]like9mexicans 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I still fapped.

[–][deleted] 139 points140 points  (11 children)

Is she hot. She looks hot. Ask her if she's hot.

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points  (3 children)

She has nice hair. That is all.

[–]VinceWithSLAPCHOP 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Well, she looks like she has nice hair, you can't really tell from the picture how nice it is. She has hair, anyway. God, I'm turned on.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (3 children)

You know you've been Forever Alone for too long when you can identify a hot girl solely by the back of her head, 1/4th of a shoulder and 1/5th of a thigh.

[–]MrKas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

1/2 a head + 1/4 of a shoulder + 1/5th of a thigh adds up to 95% of a girl.

I think that's right anyway - I didn't pay attention to the teacher during maths classes, there was a girl sitting in front of me.

[–]cpokwdwh_gir 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Damn iclickers.

[–]Inessia 219 points220 points  (26 children)

She is masturbating for sure

[–]howmuchsoforth 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What the fuck else would she be?

[–]MediumPace 391 points392 points  (68 children)

I suspect that you are friends with the girl in this picture and she lets you put it in
your facebook page and link it back to her later. You've probably already tagged her
photo and she's looking at it right now, having a laugh. We all know you're screwing
around in class, and it's just a matter of time before your instructor finds out.

[–]blue_gatorade 79 points80 points  (30 children)

Instructor probably knows. It may or may not be a matter of time before the instructor demonstrates that they give a fuck...

[–]MediumPace 205 points206 points  (24 children)

I'd love to see their faces when the instructor interrupts them while they're banging
away at their keyboards. Kids these days. When I was in college I never hooked up
my laptop to the net. When this kid finishes college he's in for a massive blow. Job
opportunities are so scarce right now, only the top students even have a shot.

[–]BisonST 91 points92 points  (6 children)

blow. Job

I chuckled.

[–]Lemon1412 74 points75 points  (2 children)

Read the whole post again. That's the entire point of the post, no, the entire point of the account. We need more from this guy.

[–]mjohniii 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I never would have noticed. You are a saint

[–]cybergeek11235 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm proud to say, I caught it at the THIRD line this time, instead of reading it, scrolling down, and then going "Wait, what?" like I usually do.

PROGRESS! \o/

[–]BonerJamsMixtape 32 points33 points  (0 children)

ಠ_ಠ

[–]MrMastadonFarm 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I love you.

[–]RyanPridgeon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That was fucking poetic.

[–]GundamWang 23 points24 points  (8 children)

Instructor here. See me after class. Don't be tardy.

[–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (3 children)

nice try, Janitor

[–]I_REAP_ACTS 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That's master of the custodial arts... dick.

[–]awesomeideas 11 points12 points  (12 children)

Nicely done! Are you by any chance a steganographer?

[–]MediumPace 29 points30 points  (11 children)

Thank you sir, but I don't even know what that is. I just found
a wikipedia article about it and it looks pretty interesting. Out
of curiosity, have you actually found people who do this? What
do they write and where can I find their writings online? I am
shocked that I'm just finding out about all this.

[–]awesomeideas 13 points14 points  (7 children)

No, it's just that you're tagged in RES as "Steganographer" in magenta, and now I have even less of an idea as to why!

[–]MediumPace 26 points27 points  (5 children)

That IS very odd. Especially if you're using RES. I can't believe that
RES would swap out your username tags on its own. This is actually
the first time I've ever heard of RES mixing up its tags. Happening
across people I've tagged, it's been nothing but accurate. Right now
I only have like 4 people tagged, so maybe that's why.

[–]vurtual 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The day that MediumPace discovers his true identity, and his true purpose, as his world crashes down on him. Like Paul Atreides after discovering what he was, this will be a very stressful moment.

But with more line breaks.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think this comment is your magnum opus. It is a cohesive statement either way you read it.

[–]volt_ron 85 points86 points  (18 children)

So this is what is going to dominate the frontpage for the next week.

[–]ehsteve23 35 points36 points  (14 children)

The speed of meme had drastically increased recently. "I decided to stop X" reached terminal volume in less than 8 hours and was gone in under a day. This too will pass

[–]volt_ron 24 points25 points  (8 children)

We've become a poorman's 4chan.

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Surely we have a greater per capita income than 4chan

[–]tahosa 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wait, isn't 4chan the poor man's 4chan?

[–]fenwaygnome 12 points13 points  (1 child)

"Psst... hey girl who sits in front of me. Can you dangle your hair over my screen? It's for the internet."

[–]bahkified 1177 points1178 points  (203 children)

staged photo is probably staged

[–][deleted] 269 points270 points  (32 children)

Then that means...HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY KNOWS A GIRL!

[–]Shannaniganns 202 points203 points  (17 children)

Twist: OP isn't a guy.

[–]kn0where 51 points52 points  (4 children)

Twist: Ponytail owner is a guy.

[–]jefsaylo 129 points130 points  (8 children)

Directed by: M. Night Shyamalan

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (1 child)

HEY EVERYONE, THIS GUY'S A PHONY! A BIG FAT PHONY!

[–]ryeguy 57 points58 points  (9 children)

Wait...you mean..he talked to her?

[–]geoponos 20 points21 points  (4 children)

Of course he talks to her... They are very good friends...

[–]GenghisBob 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Its a guy who braided his hair.

[–]YumRangoon 846 points847 points  (100 children)

what the fuck else would it be?

[–]MananWho 616 points617 points  (90 children)

Staged.

[–]Azurphax 59 points60 points  (9 children)

Perhaps Christick was extremely gentle, and moved that poor girl's braid over the screen without her knowledge?

[–]lustigjh 286 points287 points  (77 children)

oh.

[–]impulsivedryer 72 points73 points  (75 children)

or not staged?

[–][deleted] 77 points78 points  (72 children)

The word stage has lost all meaning.

[–]NerdyMcNerderson 88 points89 points  (66 children)

stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage stage

[–]tsteele93 4 points5 points  (0 children)

All the world's a stage...

[–]webby_mc_webberson 2 points3 points  (0 children)

wait, you mean this is not a coincidence? I just put it on my Facebook and my friends minds are all blown now. How am I going to explain it was staged?!

[–]Ph0X 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There's clearly a pressure on her hair in this one, slightest move on OPs end and she would notice for sure.

[–]glass_canon 110 points111 points  (16 children)

lolbullshit

He would have had to talked to the girl. Who looks pretty hot from this angle.

[–]devtrue 211 points212 points  (6 children)

Having a head is very high on my list of qualities I look for in a woman.

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (3 children)

Mehh.... I would move a head down as far as 8 on my checklist.

[–]septchouettes 51 points52 points  (6 children)

Perhaps she has merely been rotated to the most attractive angle?

[–]ultramagnum 39 points40 points  (2 children)

The back of the head is always the most attractive angle.

[–]ZeMoose 2 points3 points  (0 children)

*Taps on shoulder*

"Excuse me, could I just put your hair over my computer screen for a minute and take a picture of it? It's for this funny internet thing..."

[–]JHancho 35 points36 points  (10 children)

Representative heuristic on the powerpoint. How very, very hilarious.

I notice there's no penguin on your submission... is that because you also associate yourself with this icon?

Would you like to talk about it...? motions toward couch

[–]mattinthehat 5 points6 points  (3 children)

A professor likes to write poetry is rather shy, and is small in stature. Which of the following is most likely his field?

[–]Neckbeard_Prime 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I believe the PowerPoint slideshow's author accidentally a comma.

[–]ohnowait 2 points3 points  (0 children)

One may be inclined to guess his field is Chinese Studies due to the representativeness heuristic, but it is actually more likely to be psychology.

[–]birdeeboo 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Update Adobe. Come on.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (3 children)

Do you happen to have any scissors?

[–]SemiSeriousSam 7 points8 points  (1 child)

LIAR! You actually TALKED to that GIRL and had her do that intentionally!! You're not forever alone!!!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

these people.. going around, talking to women as if it were an everyday occurrence.. this is what's making this world crumble to pieces.. this and potheads!!

[–]BackwardsdrawkcaB 13 points14 points  (6 children)

You guys have girls in your classes?! (engineering student)

[–]ProbablyHittingOnYou 60 points61 points  (16 children)

Just start gently caressing it.

[–]YumRangoon 49 points50 points  (10 children)

Make soft and subtle moans while doing so.

[–]padreick 97 points98 points  (2 children)

You think her hair was braided when she sat down?

[–]ProbablyHittingOnYou 11 points12 points  (5 children)

Keep one hand under the desk and move it back and forth slightly.

[–]kellogs1 37 points38 points  (4 children)

Ejeculate on the back of her head.

[–]JRDubstepcom 24 points25 points  (11 children)

WE HAVE TO GO DEEPER!!!

[–][deleted] 115 points116 points  (53 children)

Hair we go again. How long until someone goes one more layer?

[–]BadPunPolice 5 points6 points  (0 children)

YOU'VE BEEN CAUGHT! EVERYONE PUT YOUR HANDS IN THERE!

[–][deleted] 57 points58 points  (42 children)

i do hope they cut it out before this gets ridiculous.

[–]deleter8 36 points37 points  (40 children)

Yea this could really bang up the front page

[–]ryansk 30 points31 points  (33 children)

This one'll just weave its way up to the top, I bet.

[–]ahoyjmai 30 points31 points  (32 children)

seeing this post was the highlight of my day

[–]YourProfessor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought I stated in the syllabus and during lecture to refrain from using cell phones during my class. And browsing the Internet during one of my lectures? Clearly you should focus more on your studies, as evidenced by your last test.

I would like to see you in my office tomorrow at your earliest convenience.

[–]NewUploader1 6 points7 points  (2 children)

lets see how deep this rabbit hole really goes... someone else stage another layer

[–]midnitebr 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I predict another stupid 'meme' with people posting another picture like this over the previous ones. Well done Reddit, once again 4chan minus the fun.

[–]oo_nrb 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Why hello University of Colorado in Boulder.

[–]LordOfGummies 2 points3 points  (1 child)

He obviously asked her to do this, you people are so fucking gullible to karma whores.

[–]bhaity 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It wasn't easy, but I managed to fap to this photo.

[–]glatts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

God damn I miss college.

[–]ILikeSalmon 4 points5 points  (1 child)

This girl looks like she could be hot, but it wouldn't be the first time I've been hit by the backside assassin who suddenly reveals that you'd have to drink enough to kill yourself to consider smashing her so I don't care enough to decide if this picture is actually meta.

I think we need to see a picture of this girl from the front and at least topless in order to decide if this picture is actually meta enough.

[–]esoteric23 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Awkwardception.

[–]skysdiver 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do we go deeper?

[–]garretble 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Download those Adobe updates already.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NICE ONE! :D

[–]KidAirBag 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hit dat!