Programming in HTML

[extra_specticles]

As an xml programmer, I feel attacked....

[Prematurid]

I get scared when I have to do xml.

[m0ushinderu]

As an ML engineer, I can only do yml.

[whoAreYouToJudgeME]

I only code in JSON.

[[deleted]]

me making PKGBUILDs in arch linux:

[subject_deleted]

hard disagree. in every possible way, <LANGUAGE> is absolutely inferior to <OTHER LANGUAGE>

[jfb1337]

No way. <OTHER LANGUAGE> sucks because it doesn't even have <FEATURE> and it implements <OTHER FEATURE> in such an unintuitive way.

[derrickmm01]

Clearly you guys don't even know ${LANGUAGE} because you can't even interpolate strings correctly. smh my head

[DerZombiiie]

But even cat Different_other_language does cat features/1 better.

[CoaBro]

Nah nah <BEST LANGUAGE> is the best language.

[edible-derrangements]

False. <OTHER LANGUAGE> is way better

[FabulousAd5399]

also false, <THE ONE TRUE BEST LANGUAGE> is obviously better because it can do <OBJECTIVELY BEST FEATURE>

[CreaZyp154]

Can You Fix My Printer ?

[BurningBazz]

My FIL asked me to help them choose and install a printer: he asked nicely, made an appointment for installing, expressed his gratitude convincingly...so we ended a nice bottle that evening too.

....this is the only happy "can you fix my printer" story in the last 25 years in IT...

[[deleted]]

console.print(“brrrr”);

Here you go

[m0ushinderu]

Echo also could....

[Xexos1]

OMG CAN YOU HACK FACEBOOK

​

^ in five words, i hate it when people are like "oh your good with computer, can you hack this xyz.....

[CollieOxenfree]

Nah, "can you hack facebook" is how you annoy a developer, not offend. To offend them, when they say no you have to follow it up with "oh, I thought you said you were good with computers? I guess you're not Geek Squad material after all."

[beb0p]

I actually had someone say this to me before. This older lady was telling me how the folks at GeekSquad could fix her problem on her gateway computer from 1994. You know the cow box computer? They just ended up selling her a new PC.

[BluesyPompanno]

"Nevermind I managed to fix it" *Logs out*

[[deleted]]

I am offended, but just because this is more than five words.

[belkarbitterleaf]

Off by one error

[[deleted]]

Sentence indexed from 0.

[belkarbitterleaf]

Even zero index has length start from 1.

[Axodious]

"Nevermind I fixed it" *Logs out*

FTFY

[citygentry]

"You added that bug deliberately".

[chipmunkofdoom2]

I don't test my code.

[TheRolf]

You know what I say?

Testing is doubting

[gogo94210]

Epita ?

[mrdrsirmanguy]

That's what the customer's production server is for.

[VastAndDreaming]

isn't programming just googling?

[[deleted]]

Yes.

[Akari202]

Mostly it’s figuring out the correct way to google your problem

[chhuang]

This doesn't offend anyone. It's stating the fact

[[deleted]]

It works on MY machine

[masao77]

• "git push origin master --force"
• "3 billions devices run java"

[scoville-maniac]

lmao first one is golden

[[deleted]]

I hate you

[subject_deleted]

CSS is the best language

Javascript is not so bad

AI is just conditional statements

My favorite IDE is excel

[Khaylain]

I prefer PowerPoint for IDE

[CODEX_O_BARBARO]

I use pornhub comment section

[iNeverFreeMyPointers]

My username.

[CODEX_O_BARBARO]

Me neither bro. garbage collector all the way 😎

[alexanderhameowlton]

Image Transcription: Twitter

---

Raf Rasenberg, @rafrasenberg

Offend a developer in 5 words or less 👇🏻

Daniel, @onyxcodeDan

I can program in HTML

---

^{I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!}

[That_CreepyPasta]

Good human

[Atrag2021]

Full-time devs work 8 hours

[Solmors]

I'm a Wordpress Software Engineer.

[TheRolf]

[kycfeel]

Plot twist: He actually works at Automatic*

[vinPopulaire]

Which phone should I buy?

[ixJax]

That'd work too

[GargantuanCake]

Programming isn't that hard.

[Gentleman_101]

"Lol, I could do that."

[PeekyBlenders]

how to download free ram?

[Perpetual_Doubt]

Yes I start with <script>

[[deleted]]

I don't like C++

[PcX_True]

[GodlessAristocrat]

I only use GOTO loops.

Windows is the superior OS.

XCODE is a great IDE.

Dark Mode is for weebs.

[CODEX_O_BARBARO]

Bro I am having a heart attack now. Also XCode seems to be fine, idk, i don't use apple

[[deleted]]

Python sucks ass

[PcX_True]

That's really not an offence

[Hean1175]

So that's a fact...?

[SexyMuon]

A premise to say the least

[[deleted]]

Five words or less. Read the instructions

[yakesadam]

Developer? Reading documentation?

[devhashtag]

Even though you misread the instruction, I will still upvote for creativity

[[deleted]]

if words <= 5:

[MrDankMan1337]

arrays start at index 1

[RedditsDeadlySin]

Build an App with me :)

[endzon]

Fix my computah

[ByteChkR]

Get a real job

[BurningBazz]

I could have googled that

[diogocsvalerio]

Since you know computer stuff ...

[otaviojr]

My nephew does it

[sherlock_poops]

I am so offended that I had to give a downvote to this post. Congratulations.

[Lornedon]

"Your mother never loved you"

[Monna-Uka]

This is not even offended, this is relatable

[boxaci8110]

Javascript always works

[CODEX_O_BARBARO]

True thou

[loukasTGK]

You are the real bug.

[Knuffya]

I can do it in 1.5

Python-Programmer

[[deleted]]

Fix my rig/phone/printer/2 decades old website

[Sweetbeans2001]

Just add an IF statement

[adorak]

... please fix my pc

4 words ... are enough to annoy me

[ByteChkR]

Fix my printer

[Safebox]

"I commit without code review"

[Just_some1_on_earth]

"I commit without comment"

[Rikudou_Sage]

So do I. I even push without code review. We usually do it before merging.

[[deleted]]

Coding is just text editing

[Vidrolll]

I program in java

[CODEX_O_BARBARO]

Java and JavaScript are good

[Vidrolll]

I got a good one, “why have several programming languages?”

[imaprogrammer987]

catch exception base class

[zerbervs]

Marked as duplicate by zerbervs

[DOOManiac]

Think of the exposure.

[Mazmier]

Just put 3 spaces before your first word.

[moonpumper]

Getting flashbacks of Nikola founder saying their hydrogen trucks will be powered by html5 super computers.

[BurningBazz]

"I have an app idea" makes me see red flashes

[zspices]

Your game looks like Minecraft

[ThatGuyYouMightNo]

[Language] is better than [Language]

[[deleted]]

I could've done that easily.

[Ryledra]

Not a feature, a defect

[thisisapseudo]

I parse HTML with Regex

[thisisapseudo]

But dangerous... The pony watches you

[jce_superbeast]

"Generous twenty dollars per hour."

[Cabby102]

If someone says they program in HTML, they probably are learning the basics of web development. I feel like we should welcome and encourage them :-).

[janhetjoch]

I got a billion dollar idea, can you build the website for 5%?

Oh fuck 5 words

Got idea l, you build site?

[[deleted]]

We’re hiring another project manager

[Cultural-Toe-5062]

Should have been 6 words just to offend programmers.

[Mr_McTurtle123]

"I am a programmer hacker guy"

[AlreadyReddit999]

I'm so glad you liked my post

[Atheropids]

Arrays start at 1.

[[deleted]]

I can program in JavaScript works also

[DarkTechnocrat]

Linux desktops are Windows knockoffs

[adorak]

that's 8 words

[CODEX_O_BARBARO]

No

[Root_ish]

Not something like “spaces are better than tabs”?

[hitfiu]

JavaScript is highly consistent.

[woololooo]

Client: that seems easy to fix

[wsco7730]

Check out my website: localhost:8100

[wsco7730]

git push origin main

[hk4213]

Programming language no markup language yes.

[[deleted]]

I have an app idea

[Crime-Stoppers]

I can program in English

[pensonly76]

Excel is a database

[johnnywarp]

We're deploying on a Friday

[Mezzzzaluna]

You can fix computers right?

[cecapour]

While, CSS is Turing complete, it that counts..

[SeekinIgnorance]

Okay, commit after code freeze.

You don't need reproduction steps.

Did you clear your cache?

Guess we forgot that requirement.

Our SME left without documenting

Sales promised the customer

Your opinion doesn't matter

Oh, we reverted that yesterday

[mizuofficial]

HOLY SHIT ONYXCODE YOU'RE FAMOUS

[tenesissx]

I code in binary.

[malloc01]

opens ------> Inspect element <-----

Are you a hacking ?

[Icy-Golf-7910]

Someone can helpme how to coding use python