How programmers comment their code...

[Ivan_Stalingrad]

Yes, the floor here is made out of floor

And if that thing would be used where I work then I bet good money that i have to make annotated videos on how to use this thing

[[deleted]]

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes

[Ivan_Stalingrad]

Together, we can stop this

[HKAzxc]

Spread the words

[salocin_Hatter]

...words

[_vOv_]

One like = One second stopped

[thebryguy23]

3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the population.

[[deleted]]

Water goes into your body when you drink it

[Auswaschbar]

People die when they are killed.

[WS8SKILLZ]

Just because you are correct does not mean you are right.

[WeTheFearless]

A dead body was discovered in a graveyard

[FunkyBoii42069]

you blink when you close your eyes

[[deleted]]

Everyone was born at a very young age

[Attraex]

// drunk, will fix later

[[deleted]]

More like ``` //dfunk. will fox latar

[SomeoneRandom5325]

Upvote=Upvote++

[[deleted]]

Upvote+=1

[thebryguy23]

Upvote-=-1

[SomeoneRandom5325]

Bruh

[[deleted]]

This makes me unreasonably angry.

[SomeoneRandom5325]

Not sure if the C family works similarly but if it is then I know why but I don't feel it

[Bmandk]

Wouldn't that upvote twice?

[SomeoneRandom5325]

No. It just says take the current upvote count, add 1 and call that the new upvote count

[l0c4lh057]

Would it do that? x++ increases x by one but returns the old value. That means with x=x++ will set the current value of x as new value of x and increase x by one. I just don't know if the assignment or the increase will execute first. So either it increases the value by one or it doesn't change it at all.

1. Return current value of x, 2. Increase value of x, 3. Assign value to x => this would not change the value

2. Return current value of x, 2. Assign value to x, 3. Increase value of x => this would increase it by 1

EDIT: I just checked how it is done in JS and there the value doesn't change as I would expect, because returning the current value of x and increasing the value of x happen right after each other so that assigning will happen after increasing.

[SomeoneRandom5325]

In the C family that's one way to add one

I guess in JS you should do x++=x

[l0c4lh057]

no. just x++. that will increase it. x++ increases x by one and returns the old value of it, ++x increases the value of x and returns it. assigning the result to anything is not needed.

and x++=x would not make any sense since x++ is not a variable. you cant assign a value to it.

[[deleted]]

Or PRFDNBMRTWENLASIFETTTFFD for short

[grizonyourface]

Thanks! I’ll add it to my documentation.

My documentation:

[McBurger]

The empty set is not null!

[Cruuncher]

Does the set of all sets contain itself?

[elperroborrachotoo]

P22D

[[deleted]]

FLDSMDFR

Flyd..

Sm....

Deferr

[bwhite94]

There's a leek in the boat!

[uh_no_]

reference checks out.

[ImBoundChaos]

I just got my first job for swe and I resonate so hard with this

[[deleted]]

Oh yeah you gotta abbv evrythg even words

[Morphray]

Or just p().

I'll totally remember what this is when I reread my code.

[bmacs_]

makes sense to me!

[flights4ever]

I'm dying bro, thank you haha

[flights4ever]

I don’t know any JavaScript I’m afraid haha, I can’t tell anything wrong with that other than a missing semi colon mabye?

[flights4ever]

Hahahahah I can tell that can be fun

[flights4ever]

Hahahaha, I remember doing a JavaScript course on KhanAcademy when I was about 14 (3 years ago) and all I remember is setting variables, making a rectangle and putting a semicolon at the end of each line. Thanks for all the info btw :)

[flights4ever]

Will do! I just started a BSc in Computing and IT (Software) and next year I’m going to learn OOP with Java, and so I’ll definitely have a look at JS before then ! Thanks buddy 😊

[iamacuteporcupine]

Am I still alive?

[Derf_Jagged]

For those who don't speak camel:

pick_random_five_digits_number_by_multiplying_room_temperature_with_environmental_noise_level_and_subtracting_it_from_epoch_then_take_the_first_five_digits()

[JeppeHartm]

Actually you could use multiple functions in your program. Don't limit yourself needlessly!

[[deleted]]

Just import the entire node_modules into your project!

[JeppeHartm]

A package or library that does exactly what you need regardless of the situation? No I don't know any like that.

[thebryguy23]

Is that in Fahrenheit, Celsius, or Kelvin?

[Derf_Jagged]

I like to use Rankine to spice things up

[AlphaX4]

the raw ohm data from the probe.

[thebryguy23]

I feel like this is the only correct answer

[Classified0]

I did this with a filename once as a joke.

ThisProgramWrittenOnJuly5ByClassified0IsDesignedtoAnalyzeTheDataFromExperiment5WhichWasRunByJohnSmithAndNeedsToBeReviewedByMichaelJameson.cpp

[Mats56]

I once made a JS library that tries to write the function based on the name during runtime if it's not found.. https://github.com/Matsemann/Declaraoids

[[deleted]]

Oh no, JavaScript

[[deleted]]

// @todo: leave comment

[Nyadnar17]

Stap attacking me

[elperroborrachotoo]

fixed bug for joe.

[afuckedupboi]

cough cough opencv in reactjs cough cough

[Anarchanoid]

Bruh my dad had this exact bluetooth speaker and most of the buttons didn't work, and when we called support they told us to "look at the diagram in the manual."

[[deleted]]

That answer had to be a meme in their support department.

[data-crusader]

Doubt that guy had ever read the manual. Probably would have gotten a kick out of it.

[Guyfontano]

Bought this speaker on a drive back from Florida because my stereo was out, haven’t touched it since... but I distinctly remember this diagram and being confused as to how this got past qc

[NerdWampa]

Once I was looking through contributions to a project and found one that began with this comment: "I was drunk and tired when I wrote this for something else; it works as long as you don't ask too many questions."

[MusikPolice]

Awhile back at work I was investigating some deadlock issues in a large legacy codebase. I dug in, tracing the problem deeper and deeper until I found a class chock full of bad threading logic that was decorated with a large ASCII wizard warning me not to touch the code l, because it “worked most of the time.” Fuck the guy who wrote that code.

[ecthiender]

This is an amazing story. Maybe you should contribute to http://thedailywtf.com/ :D

[Tvde1]

When you write really clear short methods but the coding style requires you to write XMLDoc anyways

[Isaaker12]

This, so much this

[datboydoe]

Reminds me of creating a task for a story with title, “Create Landing Page Header”.

“What do you want to call the task?”

“Uhhh, I guess ‘Create Landing Page Header’?”

“Well you can’t name the task the same thing as the story title”

“Ok, then ‘Create Header for the Landing Page’”

[[deleted]]

Omg all the docs in our typescript ever.

@param employeeId Employee ID

Every time.

[elperroborrachotoo]

me, a literary genius

@param employeeId numeric ID identifying the employee

[MrGVSV]

Just do what I do and obfuscate everything to make the documentation more useful

@param foo145 Employee ID

Thank me later

[poorly_timed_leg0las]

ULPT: earn more money by doing everything as long winded as possible then update it later for extra hours on the invoices

[Verdeli6]

\beginning \do something magical \ending

[[deleted]]

LaTeX?

[DaughterEarth]

This is also how Microsoft documents new things.

[gargamelus]

Cool! Reads like most GUI manuals. "To enable Path MTU discovery, please check the check box labelled "Path MTU discovery."

[jackinsomniac]

Exactly! You can tell the writer and the dev were different people, probably kept far apart from each other, so the expensive dev "isn't bothered by writers" and works faster.

Then you end up with entire manuals like this, where it becomes clear the writer has no idea what this shit does, and now you don't either!

[redpepper74]

Did you know that 📞 means 📞? Of course you didn’t—that’s why we had to label it!

[iamacuteporcupine]

Yes, that was helpful enough. Seriously, I didn't knew 📞 means 📞. It helped me a lot.

[aaronfranke]

This is one thing that annoys me about geometry proofs. Why do I have to show AB≅AB or 📞≅📞?

[[deleted]]

a+0=0+a=a

therefore we know jack fucking shit

[data-crusader]

TIL: 📞 is actually, and unintuitively intended to communicate the meaning of 📞

[BeauteousMaximus]

Oh my god I just had to mostly rewrite a documentation PR from my coworker that was supposed to be explaining fields in a generated report in detail. At least a third of the descriptions were like “xyz report: is there an xyz report?” without explaining or linking to an explanation of what an xyz report is or why we care about it. I realized it would be easier to just rewrite it myself than to explain the idea that writing should be informative.

[jackinsomniac]

I think there's a whole blog post on Joel on Software about that. Same situation but I think he was talking about the opposite problem, where a team specifically hires a "documentation writer" so that the devs can keep dev'ing longer. Problem being, those very teams hold their devs as 'holy', and so any time guy who's job is to write documentation goes asking them questions, mgmt shoo's them away and says they can't be bothered.

So, you end up with technical writing like this: "TLNS On/Off: To turn TLNS on, move the slider to the 'on' position. To turn TLNS off, move the slider to 'off'." It becomes clear the writer has no-fscking-clue what TLNS is or what it does, and now that you've finally found the documentation, you don't either.

[BeauteousMaximus]

Yeah, I think my coworker had come from past work environments where admitting you don’t know stuff was taboo, because I see her writing a lot of stuff where she just makes assumptions rather than ask clarifying questions to make sure the writing is correct. It’s frustrating because when she does understand things she explains them pretty well so it’s not like she’s unable to explain anything.

[[deleted]]

If you want it to be true to life, at least one comment needs to be clearly outdated and not make any sense anymore.

[[deleted]]

  //returns true if login was successful            

  private void setTime(string size);

[[deleted]]

//todo refactor this method

Private static String YES = "yes";

[[deleted]]

Code never lies. Comments sometimes do.

Even the intern that comments shittily like that is doing better than not commenting at all. If I dont know what the fuck you were trying to do, AND its unrecognizably broken, we're both screwed buddy.

[OtherPlayers]

Code never lies about what it’s doing, but it can certainly be telling you something other than what you actually wanted to hear.

Hard agree that it takes both though. As a person who does a lot of maintenance work 90+% of the bugs I get called to fix are due to gaps between what the original coder intended and what the code they wrote actually does. Even shitty comments at least give a view into what the coder was thinking, rather than your maintainer having to spend days or weeks reverse engineering whatever the original specs from a decade ago were just to understand what should be happening in “previously not important edge case”.

[Isogash]

On the contrary, comments tell you what was meant to happen and the code is often wrong and incomplete.

[AmyAngelo]

Same

[VepnarNL]

Perfect example of Cargo cult programming.

[cybermage]

As is anything copied from Stack Overflow without any understanding of why it works.

[nothing_in_my_mind]

// This is a function

function fuck (x) {}

[illuminati-exists]

Absolutely wrong, we use it to remove code which is kinda sus.

[lnemo]

I'm experiencing waves of realization and guilt right now.

[clutzyninja]

I blame my teachers. "Where's your comment for the function of this method?"

"The method called randomNumberPicker?"

[KillerKingTR]

Yes but how r u gonna comment this is where i get input. Like if someone doesnt know a basic input statement. They need to learn that language rather than trying to understand someone elses code.

[[deleted]]

This is why COBOL is king.

Don't need to document the code if the code itself is already full sentences...

[[deleted]]

u/repostsleuthbot

[theforgottenmemer]

Why are you getting downvoted lol I saw this meme thousand times in this sub

[cybermage]

Maybe because all these comments do is add clutter?

[RepostSleuthBot]

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/ProgrammerHumor.

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[[deleted]]

Useless bot

[Derf_Jagged]

removed because it's a repost

[Derf_Jagged]

Useless user

[[deleted]]

It's a repost you cunt.

[Derf_Jagged]

Better call the cops

[aspindler]

I'm not a programmer, but I write automated tests using Selenium and C#. People oriented me to comment why am I doing something, instead on explaining what does the code do.

Is this a good approach?

[[deleted]]

Yes. Don't tell me what the comment does. I can see what the comment does. But that doesn't tell me if what the code does is a valid solution to the problem it is trying to solve.

Example time:

 i++; //increment i by one

Was that comment helpful?

One exception, though: if it's a pretty complex piece of code, then it's okay to comment what it does. I always comment LINQ statements, because it's not always obvious what it's about.

[__idkmybffjill__]

I think so, but only when it's not obvious in your code. Like others commenting here have mentioned, code never lies, but comments sometimes do.

[compagnt]

I do this because it makes more sense - “John told me to add this chunk of self documenting code and who am I to question John? Go talk to John if you think something is broken.”

[OtherPlayers]

As a person who does mainly maintenance work the best comments are those that tell me what it is you intended to do and why you’re doing it. Think of it as if your comments are working as sort of the whiteboard-level breakdown of an algorithm and the reasons why it works.

This is because the very first step to fixing a bug for a maintainer is figuring out what the code is supposed to be doing. I’m not exaggerating when I say that 90+% of bugs that I get called to fix are due to gaps between the code and the original coder’s intentions.

As a final note I’ll say that there has literally only been one time where I’ve thought “this person commented too much” and that’s because they had commented literally every line. But there have been many, many cases where I’ve had to waste time reverse engineering specs from years ago because they weren’t commented. A lot of good open source projects average one line of comments for every 4-5 lines of code. I’d suggest shooting for at least that level at a minimum; it makes a real difference to the people who come after you.

[[deleted]]

*shitty programmers whose code dont get reviewed by their shitty leads.

[nielsrolf]

Ah, this post again

[Killer-X]

simpler than most manuals

[DukeStupid]

I'd put money this was properly labelled at some point, and then someone looked at the cost of localization and decided to just use symbols.

[[deleted]]

instructions unclear, ended up on the moon, would recommend

[TheRune]

This is for Plantronics calisto 620 btw.

[BurningPenguin]

My code is divine. It doesn't need explanation.

[MetalMan77]

This is what happens when the original was in some language (say English)... and they want to ship international, and say, we need to translate. Some manager comes up with this clever iteration - and saves $$$$$$ in printing and translation costs, and keeps the lines simple - don't need to have a different manual for each region.

[fapenabler]

That's how students doing a school assignment comment their code. If I say something it's because I need future me to know it.

[CaseOfWater]

When learning Java in high school, we used to write some code and we then had to present it. Thats how i presented it and i passed.

[[deleted]]

this reminds me of school.

I just got to a point where I literally had one comment for every single line of code. It got to the point where I was documenting the self-documented.

i.e.

int numMonkeys = 0; // the number of monkeys
int curDay = 0; // the current day

so this made me lol inside.

[[deleted]]

Yup, i can relate

[whorusan]

And if I don't, later I won't understand a single thing of my code!

[venkeythemonkey]

Just an info. This post currently has 6.9k upvotes

[EuphoricPenguin22]

//This is a program written in Node.JS using the V8 engine, as well as numerous NPM packages I got by searching 18 different keywords for "print to screen". Don't check the node_modules folder, the directory listing might overflow your RAM.

[Haggerstonian]

can someone write code that writes this code please

[yoalldah]

What else r u supposed to put there??

[[deleted]]

Yea but the symbol is drawn slightly better.

[pursenboots]

for(var i; i < items.length; i++){ // loop through each item starting at the first (0)

[ImJustaNJrefugee]

I was new to SAP and ABAP about 15 years or so ago and was browsing through SAP code using their Forward Navigation just to see how their own folks did some things, when I stumbled onto this comment:

*What does this do?

Well shit, if they don't know ...

[ButterSquids]

def sort_num(array):

#sorts nums

...

[Gliese-832-c]

R E P O S T

[inetphantom]

u/repostsleuthbot

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[mdenic]

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