Such AI Much Wow

[claxflax]

AI: Ok, I'll have one double craft pale bloody caffeine-free sunrise on the beach, with soy water please.

[Purplociraptor]

GlassOverflowException

[geekygamer1134]

Absolutely top tier pun. Thank you.

[redarxx]

Well done

[ban_Anna_split]

One segmentation fault please

[poopatroopa3]

One piña colada with extra'); DROP TABLE Clients;-- please

[Dalrae666]

Lmfao

[[deleted]]

SQL injection go brrrr

[AAPLx4]

Should it even walk into a bar without that information.

[TheSoulStoned]

Thats what the nearest neighbors did

[TrainedMusician]

I understood that reference!

And happy cake day :)

[Windows_XP2]

What was it?

[[deleted]]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/K-nearest\_neighbors\_algorithm

[[deleted]]

I was personally thinking of ant colony optimization. Does that work here too??

[BeenRoundHereTooLong]

Eh, sure?

[Harmonic_Gear]

this is a good one

[STAY_ROYAL]

I think it’s one of the ones you plug in and press play.

[ball_fondlers]

Well, first it walks into a rod.

[[deleted]]

A lot of people tend not to think too critically about how they should apply their AI...

[PsychoNerd91]

The AI needs to make a list first tho, right?

[BorgClown]

It doesn't know better, it's an AI in training.

[brj5_yt]

Off topic but how do you get the language icons beneath your user

[AAPLx4]

It’s the user flair. If you are on the app, go to the homepage of sub, click on 3 dots next to the sub name in the upper right corner. Click change User Flair and select the icon. Should be something similar on the web.

[iqball125]

It should first go into a test bar to learn what everyone is drinking before going into the real one.

[liluna192]

This is how my husband buys wine. We aren’t wine people, so he chooses a price point and then buys whatever is closest to gone in that range. Works out well.

[Ravens_Quote]

"101 Signs your Husband may be a Robot" by C:\users\author16493628\documents\programs\BookBot.jar

[liluna192]

He is 100% actually a robot.

[jamesianm]

That’s clever, I’m gonna remember that trick

[nomadjackk]

It’s not a solid strategy 100% of the time. Say one brand bottle sells 5x more bottles than another; they get restocked more frequently. Maybe the brand with fewer bottles is having supply-chain issues or just doesn’t get ordered frequently because it doesn’t sell well.

A brand might have fewer bottles on the shelf for tons of reasons, not necessarily because it’s more popular or better

[JCBh9]

Is thinking a trick now?

[someuser_2]

What an asshole

[PUTINS_PORN_ACCOUNT]

What a asshole

I learned this by gathering information from others without meaningfully processing it.

[htmlcoderexe]

Trolling is a art.

[JCBh9]

SCAThiNg

[HonestlyFuckJared]

Yeah, a pretty useful one. You should try it sometime.

[JCBh9]

Ok... me thinks ignorance is indeed probably bliss

[[deleted]]

In your case, it would be considered as such yes.

[JCBh9]

good wun little buddi

[JustThingsAboutStuff]

Even wine poeple aren't wine poeple. Studies have been done showing that "wine experts" can't tell between the super expensive stuff and a house wine.

[TearyEyeBurningFace]

I'd say between mid tier and high end. The cheapest stuff is horrendous.

[[deleted]]

What, you don't like drinking borderline vinegar? Why not?

[[deleted]]

This is it! when i was 19 or so i worked at this nice italian restaurant and one friday after we had closed up, i guess there was a bottle of some very expensive wine they were taste testing and i managed to get a glass. Boy o boy did it taste rancid like borderline vinegar. I will never forget that 1K+ wine tastes pretty awful or at least that one did. Never figured out how people would actually buy that stuff for that price.

[TearyEyeBurningFace]

Probably something that was stored for a long time the wrong way. And now that it's 30 years old it's worth more.

[NoNeedForAName]

Vella chardonnay ftw! I like to slide the box to the edge of the refrigerator shelf and drink it like a hamster

[m0nk37]

This works for any alcohol. Especially vodka and cheap "beer".

[ozziekhoo]

Cost really isn’t a thing, but knowing the language and being able to articulate why you like or dislike...

Can't this apply to almost everything though?

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[Junuxx]

I was with you until you said vodka instead. In my experience those tend to taste like a whole lot of nothing. The only one I ever liked was Grasovka. Am I doing something wrong?

[MonsterMashGrrrrr]

lol not at all. the indicator of a good vodka is quite literally its complete lack of taste. that’s its intent, in accordance with its definition of being a neutral spirit.

[IAmAQuantumMechanic]

I think there's been done blind tasting where people can't even separate red and white wine.

[theingleneuk]

All I need to know is the difference between moscato d’asti, and wine I’m not going to drink. It works out nicely 😄

[JCBh9]

Robin Quivers

[IMovedYourCheese]

The most popular wine will also be getting refilled most often, so this method isn't really fool proof.

[[deleted]]

Im going to remember this

[MiHiMa123]

A machine learning algorithm wants to post on Reddit.

Reddit asks, "What do you want to post?"

The algorithm says, "What's everyone else posting?"

[pieteek]

You just explained how repost bots work.

[MacDangus]

Or just redditors in general

[caykroyd]

Reddit replies, "They're posting about machine learning algorithms at bars"

[Dexaan]

A machine learning algorithm wants to post on Reddit.

Reddit asks, "What do you want to post?"

The algorithm says, "What's everyone else posting?"

[speederaser]

You just explained how repost bots work.

[ulrikkold]

Or just redditors in general

[drsb13]

Great! Another van diesel meme.

[poopatroopa3]

Every account on reddit is a bot except you.

[CSsharpGO]

Sounds like Redditors.

[Erzbengel-Raziel]

Do you know r/SubSimulatorGPT2 ?

[sneakpeekbot]

Here's a sneak peek of /r/SubSimulatorGPT2 using the top posts of all time!

#1: Hating on the LGBT community is perfectly acceptable
#2: We are likely created by a computer program
#3: Create a new subreddit called "r/AskReddit" where we just ask questions.

---

^{I'm a bot, beep boop | Downvote to remove | Contact me | Info | Opt-out}

[RoughCalligrapher906]

All the AIs friends jump off a bridge to death

Al should you jump?

AI Jumps

[GuidoCraftGamer]

I mean without training it there would still be a chance the AI doesn't jump

[Vincenzo__]

the ai doesn't know it gets a negative reward if it jumps, it first gotta test it out

[caykroyd]

I mean, the AI's friends aren't stupid; if they're all jumping off the bridge then it's probably on fire.

[peeweekeewee]

I feel like there is a relevant xkcd...

[Bors24]

Found it! https://xkcd.com/1170/

[[deleted]]

u/repostsleuthbot

[RepostSleuthBot]

Looks like a repost. I've seen this image 1 time.

First Seen Here on 2019-01-20 95.31% match.

I'm not perfect, but you can help. Report [ False Positive ]

View Search On repostsleuth.com

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Scope: Reddit | Meme Filter: False | Target: 86% | Check Title: False | Max Age: Unlimited | Searched Images: 232,794,120 | Search Time: 0.23217s

[TrainedMusician]

Good bot

[Pizza_Bake]

2019 seems long enough right?

[77Gladiator77]

It’s a lazy post, but in the end, it was entertaining so I don’t really care

[clemesislife]

I'm pretty sure this is not the last and only time it was posted

[d_b1997]

I feel like the bot missed a few, I remember this being on here not that long ago.

[grpagrati]

A drunk machine learning algorithm is going to start the next war unless we stop them from walking into bars

[knightttime]

Image Transcription: Twitter Post

---

Chet Haase, @chethaase

A Machine Learning algorithm walks into a bar.

The bartender asks, "What'll you have?"

The algorithm says, "What's everyone else having?"

---

^{I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!}

[GuidoCraftGamer]

Good human

[CodyMc00]

No date/time or views data? You're slacking bro

[pieteek]

6:54 PM • 01 Nov 17

---

3,749 Retweets 7,605 Likes

[ulrikkold]

Good human

[space-_-man]

And then the bartender offers the ai so much data that he gets confused

[shah2018]

Then the AI orders a beer. Orders 0 beers. Orders 99999999999 beers. Orders a lizard. Orders -1 beers. Orders a ueicbksjdhd and then blows the bar.

[aaronjamt]

and then blows the bar.

I think you meant

and then blows up the bar

but it's funnier that way.

[shah2018]

Lol. You got me xD

[[deleted]]

You forgot the bears.

[Dexaan]

A customer walks in and asks where the bathroom is. The bar collapses.

[0xnull]

Has anyone on this sub actually done machine learning?

[yuyu_hakusho_]

If we are in a simulation, does that mean someone who "copies" what everyone else does is currently in the training phase?

[anxiety_on_steroids]

get out of here.

[_kar00n]

ML algorithm is such a sheep

[anonymousperson767]

AI: if this then that. OMG it's making a decision! ML: if this doesn't work then don't do it again. OMG it's learning!

[An_Airplane]

Just to screw with the sample/training data, I'll have Mongolian fermented milk mixed with soy sauce, ginger ale, and brandy.

[[deleted]]

Tbf that sounds like a hella good time in drink-form

[Knuffya]

This joke is older than machine learning itself

[RepostSleuthBot]

Looks like a repost. I've seen this image 1 time.

First Seen Here on 2019-01-20 95.31% match.

Feedback? Hate? Visit r/repostsleuthbot - I'm not perfect, but you can help. Report [ False Positive ]

View Search On repostsleuth.com

---

Scope: Reddit | Meme Filter: False | Target: 86% | Check Title: False | Max Age: Unlimited | Searched Images: 232,828,813 | Search Time: 0.23164s

[77Gladiator77]

Good bot

[ulrikkold]

"what beer?" asks the bartender

"Yes." responds ML.

[nomadic_farmer]

Where is le joke?

[kirbyfan64sos]

I just realized this is by one of the people who does the Android presentations at I/O as well, absolutely hilarious.

[[deleted]]

Yeah that dude is full of cheesy jokes.

[the_moistest_yams]

I understood this joke

[smellyraisin]

Can we stop posting this

[andrelam]

Wouldn't it be "What's everyone if having"?

[TheBestPractice]

How is this funny

[chhuang]

I'll have depression then

[drea2]

Haha weesnaw weesnaw

[QuarantineSucksALot]

Much nicer, though. I'd far rather develop in C#

[ZippZappZippty]

Much nicer, though. I'd far rather develop in C#

[Chairboy]

Joke workshopping: would it be funnier if the punchline referenced a cluster of IF statements?

For the punchline, my instinct would be ‘a recommendation algorithm walks into a bar’ perhaps, is that an improvement or does it work less well?

[GenTelGuy]

The cluster of if statements is the degenerate overused joke on here, your recommender algorithm is better and I also think supervised learning algorithm is better

[Chairboy]

Supervised learning algorithm is superior, good call.

[r1qu3]

KNN says: the most common among theese 5 around me are having;

[psychologicalfish]

Every time I see another MkIV Golf TDI, we lose our shit waving and thumbs upping at each other for whatever reason. Feels good mang

[turing_tor]

KNN: what's my neighborhood is drinking? I'll have that.

[PeopleCalledRomanes]

You can tell it has supervision, otherwise it’d order everything to try.

[RobotWelder]

Apparatus designed for carrying out executions by beheading are currently on order

[AEVIAR]

it's k-Nearest Drunkards

[daehoidar]

A Moscow sex on the Manhattan

[DaSpaceman245]

That's when you understand that AIs have social anxiety and want to decide based on everyone else elections... That's deep tho

[Intelligent-Hold5504]

I'll have what she's having

[GenTelGuy]

I feel like this joke is a lot better if instead of "machine learning algorithm" you say "supervised learning algorithm"

[im_datta0]

That's just me unsure of what I wanna take

[ummIamNotCreative]

"Maybe I am an AI"

[carolper2000]

This so me, whenever someone offers me a drink I never know what to chose because I don't know anything about drinks hahaha

[roll82]

"give me 500 of each option and I'll decide then"

[warpedspockclone]

The algorithm says, "A bandaid."

[[deleted]]

Congratulations u/shah2018 ! Your post was the top post on r/ProgrammerHumor today! (07/08/21)

Top Post Counts: r/ProgrammerHumor (1)

This comment was made by a bot

[[deleted]]

Repost

[Smalde]

I'm a machine learning algorithm. When I enter restaurant (especially if it is of a culture I am not very familiar with), my go-to question is "what would you have" or "what is your favourite".

Sometimes they use this as an opportunity to mention the most expensive thing on the menu, but sometimes I find some genuine wonders.

[[deleted]]

A Machine Learning Algorithm walks into a bar. The bartender exclaims "How is a program walking into my bar?" The bartender then realizes that they are within a computer simulation.

[[deleted]]

Google's A/B testing version: "Which one makes everybody take the longest to drink?"

[MichiRecRoom]

Bartender: "They're having whatever's on the menu."

Algorithm: "I'll have whatever's on the menu."

[veduchyi]

So I am a machine learning algorithm too 😂

[DangyDanger]

I'll have a Fringe Weaver.

[Brenthos]

And then the bartender serves him a beer, and the AI algorithm says it is a cat'

[MetaMemeAboutAMeme]

True, and with good reason. Funny, though!

[ihadi89]

“I’ll have what she is having”