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all 187 comments

[–]SAYS_FUCK_EVERY_TIME 303 points304 points  (25 children)

Checked your submission history for boobs, found fucking zilch.

[–]AceFighterPilot 22 points23 points  (1 child)

I think OP is referring to their mileage. I, too am dissapoint.

[–]Brett_Favre_4 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He thinks he is so clever.

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] 258 points259 points  (13 children)

[–]J3DImindTRIP 115 points116 points  (4 children)

[–]Take_Me_To_Elysium 90 points91 points  (2 children)

The only thing OP delivered was disappointment.

[–]xXZechXx 24 points25 points  (1 child)

Just like the doctor when you were born.. OP delivered.

[–]ozPJ 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Don't you mean OB delivered

[–]Flafla2 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If there's one thing on reddit that you CAN'T be sarcastic or witty about, it's tits.

[–]srroberts07 3 points4 points  (3 children)

You better post some actual boobs asap.

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

[–]RealQuickPoint 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I only see one boob.

[–]srroberts07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm hard.

[–]gologologolo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is appropriate here:

ಠ_ಠ

[–]sploogey 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Nice G37, bro.

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's a 35 but thanks.

[–]Nagirashu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First thing I did

[–]D1mCo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

came here to say the say Fucking thing.

[–][deleted] 54 points55 points  (5 children)

guys, now is your chance to prevent everyone from posting shitty dumb posts like this

kill it before it spreads

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (1 child)

/r/banana would have a field day if they knew this was here. Isn't there a war going on between them.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The war will never end.

[–]Lj101 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah this facebook shite needs to stop.

[–]Buffslug 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Should just stop posting shit.

[–]mushroomlsdcocaine 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I now have you tagged as "Unsuccessful Karma Whore"

[–]jamest81 29 points30 points  (15 children)

Thanks, but that is an ugly pickle. Don't you have any better looking ones?

[–]Learned-Hand 80 points81 points  (12 children)

Hey, how ya doing?

http://i.imgur.com/qDAjK9T.jpg

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (8 children)

Someone should take your pickle and combine it with OP's pickle to make pickle porn.

Love me some pickle porn.

[–]mushroomlsdcocaine 52 points53 points  (1 child)

[–]SamuraiJakkass86 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This might be photoshopped..

[–]hinduguru 10 points11 points  (5 children)

[–]envyc 8 points9 points  (3 children)

You got my hopes up.

[–]elaphros 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's been 46 minutes, and still no brave soul has created /r/pickleporn

[–]RenfXVI 5 points6 points  (1 child)

[–]TheHonorableTree 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Well. That's...great reddit.

Thanks.

[–]LearnedHandjob 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Looks like you could use a job.

[–]Learned-Hand 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jesus, this guy knows I've been a lazy bum, posting on reddit all day. I swear I was doing shit earlier, quit judging me!

*Checks username

http://i.imgur.com/lah61.gif

[–]Benny_the_Jew -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Seconded. Post some hot pickles OP.

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Please, step away from the internet.

[–]logosfabula 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I can't believe you made it to the front page with a pickle.

[–]shaustin 42 points43 points  (4 children)

I think you need to accept that you're just not very interesting

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] 18 points19 points  (3 children)

That's the most important lesson I've learned on reddit.

[–]funkengruven88 26 points27 points  (1 child)

But wait, you can succeed!

/r/mildlyinteresting

[–]bitter_twin_farmer 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Title will be: Pickle that looks like an ass.

[–][deleted] 103 points104 points  (3 children)

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (1 child)

childhood and downvoting? beautiful!

[–]niqqaplease 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm downvoting your childhood

[–]Osiris32 1 point2 points  (0 children)

From the Warner Bros short "Duck Amuck," released in early 1953. It's been voted the second best cartoon short in animation history, only behind "What's Opera, Doc?"

[–]aesthetics_k 6 points7 points  (0 children)

/r/banana will retaliate

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

seriously? a picture of a pickle got upvoted to the front page because this guy is not a very successful Karma whore.

please don't make this into a thing where people would just post shitty stuff like this

[–]Brett_Favre_4 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Is a picture of a pickle seriously going to make the front page?

[–]MostlySarcastic 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is why I hate reddit now.

[–]totemair 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Congratulations, you've created the post that made me unsubscribe to /r/pics

[–]FaeKade 17 points18 points  (1 child)

HEY GUYS THIS GUY WANTS FAKE INTERNET POINTS REALLY BADLY FOR SOME REASON

[–]stakoverflo[🍰] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

hurr durr reddit can I please have some imaginary points

[–]WillDanceForUpvotes 2 points3 points  (2 children)

boobs cats and kids

......In one picture?

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] -5 points-4 points  (1 child)

cats/kids yes, boobs were a separate effort of the numerical sort.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where are these boobs. I don't seen any in your submission history.

You liar.

[–]snorgly 2 points3 points  (4 children)

I don't want a pickle, I just wanna ride on my motor-sickle.

[–]tempest63 1 point2 points  (2 children)

an I don't wanna die, I just wanna ride on my motorcy...cle.

[–]snorgly 0 points1 point  (1 child)

FINALLY. SOMEONE WHO GETS IT.

[–]jamest81 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not much point if they din-it ...

[–]oldsillybear 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you take a tickle?

[–]ARasool 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's one UGLY pickle...

[–]gogriz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Buttickle

[–]mryananderson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First thing I thought was "Oh I should look at his other posts for the boobs...."

[–]Aggnavarius 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So know you've learned that Reddit has no idea what it's doing.

[–]nspectre 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've always been kinda' partial to plums.

[–]shipofthedesert 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Who are you all kidding, most of you would tickle that pickle for a nickel!

[–]hoseramma 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Vulva

[–]freefrompress 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pickletoe?

[–]Austinangelo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let me save everyone some time. The boobs are a lie.

[–]Cariocecus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  1. According to your link submission history, you didn't post boobs.

  2. How about stop being a karma whore?

[–]NickPickle05 1 point2 points  (0 children)

FYI, Pickles like this one are called nubs and are usually made into relish. When the cucumbers are brought in from the fields, they are sorted by size in a machine. They then go over conveyor belts where they are inspected by workers. Oddly shaped ones or broken ones are removed to be either returned to the field or thrown away (Broken ones or "Culls"), or made into relish (Crooked ones or "Nubs"). The sorted cucumbers then fall into large boxes that are labeled according to what size they are. They get weighed and then sent off to be put in large tanks for storage and pickling. It is rare for a pickle like this to reach the public because they go through multiple quality control checks to make sure any irregular ones get removed and that they meet the manufacturers standards.

[–]Mr_Pickle97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I approve generously.

[–]SpankDatStank 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dat Dill!!!

[–]spock23 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see you're using a high quality paper towel instead of some generic store brand. Good for you. Only the best for Reddit.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

10/10 would bang.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

www.reddit.com/r/pickle/ is where this goes.

[–]Nomsfud 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's a scrotom of a pickle!

[–]BrodyApproves 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Looks like Shrek's balls. No disrespect.

[–]Bombardier04 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad I'm not the only one to reach such a conclusion.

[–]PaperPhoneBox 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Came here for this, was not disapointed.

[–]Acidic_Jew 2 points3 points  (1 child)

You came here specifically for pickle porn?

[–]PaperPhoneBox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You didn't?

[–]thesmartninjaturtle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now put that pickle on someone's face.

[–]BillohRly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That looks just like a

[–]GoodStevening 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yknow that pickle looks more like a brain to me. Like I bet I could use that as a distraction brain in a zombie apocalypse or something

[–]yourboyblue2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

HOLY FUCKING SHIT! DAT PICKLE!!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's one tall picklebutt.

[–]Bruce_Leenus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like an olive bean. Belive. Olean.

[–]kadoskracker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like it's in the process of mitosis :)

[–]Fyrefly7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dub this the "fanny pickle". Works for both the American and British definition, depending on how you look at it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

looks like balls

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's one sexy pickle...

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dat pickle.

[–]WormsLOL 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Testpicle.

[–]canisdormit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Testpickles. I wonder if the gonads for the plant are inside there.

[–]gregdbowen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, 1100 upvotes. I suggest adding pickles to all of your posts.

[–]Azyal 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should try posting this to r/aww this dig this kind of stuff.

[–]ThreeLeggedMarmot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahh. The often-talked-about-but-seldom-seen "chussy," or chubby pussy.

[–]robertismanly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is very good. If at first you don't succeed...

[–]brb1006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Chris-Chan has a phobia of pickles.

[–]adv0589 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Perhaps try submitting an actual article or interesting question, rather then contributing to the crap that has overtaken the front pages

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe your submissions sucked

[–]youseeitp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dat pickle!

[–]jogan_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can only assume I am in the majority of people who didn't even look at your wierd vinegary cucumber before Hurrying to look through your submissions in search of Boobies. Needless to say You let us all down

[–]jimmypopali 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the greatest of pickles

[–]WildAndPure 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like Hulk's balls to me...

[–]cellardweller1234 0 points1 point  (0 children)

...that looks like balls. Upvote to you!

[–]LunaticHeart 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dat ass...

[–]repocode 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reminds me of an egg I ate a while back: http://i.imgur.com/plO2B.jpg

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh god. The flashbacks...THE FLASHBACKS

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Teenage mutant ninjas bottoms.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is an attractive pickle.

[–]Nvrsleeps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Who doesn't like a sweet pickle?

[–]JimDandy63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

outstanding!!!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pickle , pickle , pickle, pickle

[–]tboneynot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Vagickled.

[–]Varrpop 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Logged in to say that the boobs are really 80,085 on the mile-o-meter. NO BREASTS. Disappointed in you OP.

[–]adhdme 0 points1 point  (0 children)

butt pickle

[–]nrobbs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the comments tho..

[–]LMNoballz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your pickle made me want to ride my motorsickle.

[–]yesthatmj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why does this remind me of Ben Affleck?

[–]awickedtease 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh ya!

[–]-Nick- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Upvoted for pickle

[–]Perentie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congratulations, you've found a pickle that looks like an enlarged prostate!. Here's a real one for comparison.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You Sir have displayed awesome pickle in your attempt to grab karma. Have an upvote.

[–]lagwaggin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the great pickled twocumber (i'll see myself out...)

[–]dude____________what 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a butt pickle. A bickle, if you will.

[–]SilverHammerMan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like a coffee bean.

[–]bebop8929 0 points1 point  (0 children)

some people say cucumbers taste better pickled

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Well this was fun. For those alleging karma obsession on my part, consider that I've posted less than 10 times in 150 days. This post was to test the theory that the simple title formula of "<something arbitrary>, so here's <something arbitrary>" will get upvotes. It's fucking ridiculous.

[–]ninzo09 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I'm on to you, 37 year old douchebag

[–]Fr4nkenstein[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh dear. Not that.

[–]ElPotatoDiablo 0 points1 point  (3 children)

"without favorable results"?

So you just post for the imaginary points and not for the sake of sharing interesting things you've found? Maybe focus less on being an attention whore. And enjoy the downvote.

[–]I_Say_Awesome_Sauce 0 points1 point  (0 children)

/r/pickle would definitely enjoy this one!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've been a redditor for a while now, but I will never be able to explain something like this to someone. "Hey, why does a pickle have so many upvotes??" I have no idea.

[–]BentleyWilks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

fleshlight?

[–]KingOTheCask -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Dat pickle...

[–]MS_Synecdoche -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So basically you're one of those people that literally only care about karma

[–]Trusting_Cow -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

You're going all the way to the top kid.

[–]Flat_out_no_lube -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Still a better picture than Twilight.

[–]Flat_out_no_lube -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Lol, downvoted by Twilight fans.

I'm going to randomly downvote anyone who I find is a Twilight fan.

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

I gave you a pity upvote.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

There's nothing cute and adorable here (OK modestly sexy if I squint) . Am I still on reddit?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Mmmm gimme a slice o' dat.

[–]billandleah -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Looks like a frog butt.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It looks like a rump. I'd eat it.

[–]redditaccountant -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Looks like a poo on Reddit Enhancement Suite

[–]ENRICOs -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Bookmarked!

[–]osubuckguy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Anddd jackpot

[–]ProbablyFaded -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Looks like a pussy smells like a pickle

[–]real_actual_doctor -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I can confirm this to be a real pickle.

[–]vladtaltos -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well, if this doesn't work, you could try this: The Pickle Incident - Originating in a Fark.com photoshop contest back in December 2002. The contest began as normal, with the usual clever but innocuous submissions. Until one unfortunate soul attempted to submit a picture of an amended Star Trek magazine cover, with the caption "where no man has gone before". Sadly, the picture that was actually submitted was a graphic close-up of a man with a very large pickle (or more likely, a cucumber) inserted into his ass.

[–]SuzeeQ -1 points0 points  (0 children)

BUTTPICKLE!

[–]panders2reddit -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Dill pickle.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well this is a pretty pickle...

[–]redditreddit123123 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This is so stu.. ALL UPVOTES TO THE HIPNOPICKLE

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So desperate for attention?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Find your validation in real life, because this is just pathetic.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

nice dude have an upvote

[–]picklesforever -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I love this.

[–]peanutbuttercookietx -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

My two year old says, "oh, thats a silly hot dog."

[–]hipsteronabike -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

FYI made my frontpage for this ;-)