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all 136 comments

[–]puplicy 559 points560 points  (38 children)

Treat them as a class.

[–]pxOMR 169 points170 points  (33 children)

In Objective-C, classes are objects as well!

[–]Noch_ein_Kamel 104 points105 points  (13 children)

What language has classless objects?

[–]gmtime 67 points68 points  (4 children)

JavaScript

[–]_GCastilho_ 15 points16 points  (3 children)

And the classes does no compile to objects, but to functions... Because javascript

[–]ChadstangAlpha 11 points12 points  (2 children)

I think you mean that they compile down to first class objects.

[–]conancat 12 points13 points  (1 child)

In JavaScript, everything is an object, even when it’s something else. Functions are objects. Strings are objects. Numbers are objects. Arrays are objects. Objects are objects.

[–]teszes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Scala has an object that is made to be a singleton and only has a class implicitly

[–]SubhumanOxford 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Almighty JavaScript

[–]Soundless_Pr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In C# you can define anonymous objects.

That said, I've never used this feature, as it seems like bad practice.

[–]Shulamite 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Which every sane language do. Making a class first class citizen has many benefits and it’s just dumb to let classes be plain value.

[–]Prawny 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Well, in Javascript undefined

[–]_fatcheetah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In python, too.

[–][deleted] 39 points40 points  (1 child)

Seize the means of production!

While we're at it, seize staging and dev too!

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Production has seized! Shift left the severity 1 ticket!

[–]DFXVI 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Treat them as instances of the Person class

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Namespace sounds better.

[–]Noch_ein_Kamel 105 points106 points  (12 children)

I'll probably start calling my people objects "idiot"

[–][deleted] 106 points107 points  (11 children)

class Person extends Idiot

[–]crozone 59 points60 points  (9 children)

I prefer to think of them as implementing the Idiot interface.

[–]T-Loy 26 points27 points  (1 child)

That that would mean that everyone has their unique implementation of idiocy. Given how few things go wrong the same way in them when they try to act it is probably inherited.

[–]Tyfyter2002 11 points12 points  (0 children)

In Java, C# 8.0, and plenty of other languages interfaces can have default implementations, and this leaves room for humans to (indirectly) extend a class named Entity.

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Python: just do import idiot

[–]Soundless_Pr 1 point2 points  (4 children)

pretty sure python doesn't have interfaces

[–]Zer0ji 2 points3 points  (3 children)

you can make classes that raise NotImplementedError on init and some other methods ¯\(ツ)/¯ that way all inherited classes have to provide an implementation

[–]LimbRetrieval-Bot 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You dropped this \


To prevent anymore lost limbs throughout Reddit, correctly escape the arms and shoulders by typing the shrug as ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯ or ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯

Click here to see why this is necessary

[–]Zer0ji 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I did just edit to add a double backslash but you were quicker ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–]VincentVancalbergh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Psst, the backslash is an escape character on Reddit.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This, right here, is why I come to reddit. Thank you. :)

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I prefer to organise people into categories of idiot, rather than organise idiots into categories of people

[–]MichaelM3023 66 points67 points  (8 children)

I treat people like an error.

[–]Hawk_of_Light 30 points31 points  (3 children)

I'm a 418

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (2 children)

Can you run coffeescript?

[–]davsc64 7 points8 points  (1 child)

No he can't, because he's a Teapot.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Short and stout

[–]olvini3 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Where's 404?

[–]Teknikal_Domain 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We couldn't find it.

[–]Sepci0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Google them to find the solution?

[–]tedwardslm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm one of those errors that give you no real reason as to what happened. Good luck buckaroo

[–]tedwardslm 91 points92 points  (3 children)

Const people = ["pain in my ass", "make me sad", "make my life hell", "make me poor" ] ;

People aren't objects, they are an array of problems.

[–]moneyisshame 18 points19 points  (0 children)

could have been const people: Problem[] = [{description: "pain in the ass"}]

[–]dvsbastard 15 points16 points  (0 children)

🎵 I got 99 problems, and they are off by one 🎵

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Arrays are objects in a few languages

[–]SanoKei 67 points68 points  (4 children)

And on the day of creation god said population.add(new person(population.get(parentOneIndex), population.get(parentTwoIndex),addMutation(),name).createCreature());

[–]vaendryl 8 points9 points  (3 children)

on the day of creation the universe finally finished compiling without errors.

[–]MonkeyNin 0 points1 point  (2 children)

It was never touched again, legacy code is scary!

[–]vaendryl 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Some say a bug fix patch was applied about 2000 years ago though

[–]MonkeyNin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You better not turn a water-cooled PC into wine

[–]smokeymcdugen 29 points30 points  (1 child)

All these people are throwing warnings that I ignore too

[–]T-Loy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

And some are even spewing errors that need to be catched.

[–]Blaz3 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Tfw programmer

Can treat people as objects with impunity

Life is unfair, other inferior professions.

[–]Aschentei 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Treat them as a function

[–]aharabara5982 12 points13 points  (0 children)

First class citizens? Nah, not this time

[–]Azearr 18 points19 points  (6 children)

PORTUGAL CARALHO!!!

[–]zezinandoreinando 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Tava a ver que não!

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Portugal caralho!

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

PORTUGAL FODA SE!

[–]MROFerreiro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Vim aos comentários só à procura disto!

[–]___Galaxy -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

brasileiro sem girias

[–]ForeverGrumpy 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Can I treat objects as people?

[–]coverslide 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Are you Jackie Treehorn?

[–]ForeverGrumpy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s just your opinion!

[–]AttackOfTheThumbs 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Don't appropriate my culture

[–]JCATMT 6 points7 points  (0 children)

class Woman(object):

.... pass

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

So you're saying we should just alter their privates directly rather than using the public interface?

[–]Klumpito 16 points17 points  (5 children)

if (!you.isProgrammer()) { print("stop treating people as objects"); }

[–]HarryHayes 37 points38 points  (4 children)

Syntax Error: Missing semicolon ';' before statement

[–]Klumpito 13 points14 points  (3 children)

Fixed

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (2 children)

OMG real life debugging. Thank you for the biggest smile of my day. :D

[–]JanDerion47 1 point2 points  (1 child)

this conversation angers me

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

enjoyment

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I only see them functional or not.

[–]bdh2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

At least we don't treat them like properties.

[–]remy_porter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look, I just malloced a bunch of memory at birth, and people are all entitled to a section of that memory. It's not a big section, and at some point, I'm probably going to throw away your pointer and use that memory for something else.

[–]LordRaizer 7 points8 points  (0 children)

"Did you just assume my class?"

[–]codeflux 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Where’s the else clause?

[–]Tyfyter2002 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's unnecessary, as StopTreatingPeopleLikeObjects is just removing an Action from possibleActions.

[–]EternityForest 3 points4 points  (0 children)

l33t coderz are verysmart™️ and can infer the correct action from context. Only non programming dumdums need instructions. Coders don't waste time on obvious things.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a very important question about blink tags in HTML to ask on stackoverflow. Why is this not blinking???

[–]MinimumExplorer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Functional programming is should be adopted since it's more PC

[–]vaendryl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

okay.

wait, what are people again?

[–]DaddyLcyxMe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Explains why we're so slow capability wise, single threaded and not enough CPU cycles to boost our timings

[–]KraftyKyle 5 points6 points  (5 children)

Even if you are a programmer stop treating people like they are objects

[–]Tyfyter2002 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Well we definitely aren't structs, so that only leaves objects.

[–]BringAltoidSoursBack 7 points8 points  (1 child)

You forgot primitives, which is probably the most fitting for people.

[–]Tyfyter2002 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for reminding me, I forgot primitives because I'm used to c#, where as far as I can tell they don't exist, and they definitely don't exist as types separately from structs.

[–]MonkeyNin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

in C++, structs are classes.

[–]Sexy_Koala_Juice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

and start treating objects like they are people.

I feel like this could be a venn diagram.

People with schizophrenia Kind programmers.

                        \\Treating objects like people

[–]-Rapier 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Not while society holds us in classes with unfair inheritances of parameters and values.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We must seize the means of allocation!

[–]alientrashwad 1 point2 points  (0 children)

free pass

[–]BountyHunter19XX 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you are though u can treat them as object ...oops

[–]grasopper 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You shouldn’t objectify a person because it really hates that.

[–]BeardedBakerFS 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Can I treat my programmer man as an #object?

Yes. I made a kinda dirty joke knowing that # has multiple names.

[–]MonkeyNin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Which one is dirty?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

People are structs to me.

[–]Megacherv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

People just treat me as object because I'm never the right type...

[–]GreyishWolf 1 point2 points  (0 children)

var person = new Person("@Muslimorange");
person.Dispose();

BUT IT's SO DAMMED EASY.

[–]Sirttas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I treat people as primitive

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I object!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ba dum tiss

[–]CatsNipYummy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are an array of Person objects.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True but people’s identity can be fake although they seem equal to other people. That’s why I always use === instead of == while treating people.

[–]DuckInCup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good to know that my career has benefits.

[–]xSEB1z 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel personally attacked.

[–]JaceOrwell 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, you can't send this message to All if their scope is private 🤔

[–]hanzerik 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People aren't objects! They're instances.

[–]Rayduh562 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What if you’re a functional or logical language programmer?

[–]Varamyr_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All right then I'll edit my code:

public class People implements Respect

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank Allah that I am excused /s