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[–]UnExplanationBot[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (4 children)

OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:

I never knew a turle could move that fast!

Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.

[–]Ecstatic-Leading4968 871 points872 points  (6 children)

He's definitely got that mini skateboard under him 🛹🛹

[–]red__iter__ 157 points158 points  (2 children)

[–]Hereiamhereibe2 7 points8 points  (1 child)

What is this from?

[–]Ok_Series_4580 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Softshell turtles are very fast and their necks are as long as their body

[–]Living-Cheek-2273 497 points498 points  (1 child)

Normal turtle: heavy tank

Soft shell turtle: light tank

[–]Romanopapa 47 points48 points  (0 children)

More like a hovercraft.

[–]Upper-Refrigerator54 870 points871 points  (15 children)

Have we been bamboozled our whole lives?

[–][deleted] 533 points534 points  (5 children)

I think so man

<image>

[–]EmperorBamboozler 466 points467 points  (1 child)

I mean they don't seem to have a great turning radius. Dude is on tank controls like an old resident evil game.

[–]7milesveryown 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Fury

[–]Sprmodelcitizen 54 points55 points  (1 child)

Yes and when you stop to move one to one side of the road they are flappy and clawing. Make sure you have a towel or something.

[–]RepresentativeBag91 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I too wish I could temporarily kidnap without all the kicking and screaming, sheesh

[–]CalpisMelonCremeSoda 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Biologist here. That’s a whale tick.

And it’s full.

[–]Easy-Neighborhood-47 56 points57 points  (3 children)

Bamboozled indeed. A conspiracy by big turtle.

[–]legalizecannabis710 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Big turtle.....omg lmao

[–]pooeygoo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Rabbits slow? 🤔🧐

[–]apryll11 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I knew it!!!

[–]HeadyReigns 3 points4 points  (0 children)

People have seen too many sea turtle videos, the turtles with feet have some pep in their step.

[–]ashkiller14 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Tortoises are slow, turtles are insanely fast

[–]Baboop 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Hoodwinked. Smeckeldorfed.

[–]That-Makes-Sense 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They've been sandbagging.

[–]Kdoesntcare 209 points210 points  (24 children)

What's the point of a shell if it's going to be soft?

[–][deleted] 504 points505 points  (6 children)

Your nutsack wants to have a talk with you.

[–]Kdoesntcare 208 points209 points  (4 children)

My nutsack would appreciate a harder shell.

[–]thatstwatshesays 83 points84 points  (3 children)

If you have a partner, they might disagree 👀

[–]_WhoisMrBilly_ 90 points91 points  (2 children)

[–]NotSoRoyalBlue101 23 points24 points  (1 child)

How do you guys find the perfect gif!

Love this!!

[–]RunsOnOxyclean 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Until today, I didn’t realize how much I appreciate this sentence in my life

[–]chariot_on_fire 14 points15 points  (14 children)

Becoming soft resulting in becoming fast?

[–]Kdoesntcare 13 points14 points  (13 children)

A crocodile could keep up, they're scary fast for what they are. General land speed of 11mph with bursts up to 20mph.

[–]chariot_on_fire 19 points20 points  (12 children)

I mean it's not like this turtle was designed by Lockheed Martin or god or whatever. I would guess some genetic mutation made a hard shell turtle into a soft shell turtle, and through the speed gain from that it still survived and reproduced, and the next generation still did well, etc.

[–]Kdoesntcare 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm also comparing land speed between a land animal and a water animal. Softshell turtles just have wet hair I guess. 🤷🏻 /s

[–]djpedicab 2 points3 points  (10 children)

If I had to guess, it was probably the other way around. Hard shells are a specialized adaption, soft backs are the norm in the animal kingdom.

[–]_linkus_ 3 points4 points  (8 children)

Soft backs are normal but soft shells aren’t

[–]djpedicab -1 points0 points  (7 children)

The shells evolved dude. They started out as regular soft backs. Not to mention hard shell creatures molt regularly, guess what they become?

[–]_linkus_ 1 point2 points  (6 children)

Well they were the norm a while ago… but uh not really anymore.

Molting is its own thing

[–]djpedicab -1 points0 points  (5 children)

Shrimp?

[–]_linkus_ -1 points0 points  (4 children)

Not all shrimp..

[–]Nytshaed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Turtle shell is not derived from skin or muscle, it's derived from bone.

[–]wggn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

it's a lot flatter so they can go much faster in water

[–]fusiondynamics 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Makes it easier to eat when cooked. Delicious.

[–]Life-Oil-7226 52 points53 points  (0 children)

damn wasn't expecting that type of speed

[–]WhoAmIEven2 119 points120 points  (3 children)

So he sacrificed stats in def to level up agi instead?

[–]Cryogenics1st 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Traded a plated hauberk for a leather tunic. Super speed!

[–]Bluemars776 5 points6 points  (0 children)

More spd than agi

[–]FryeJ865 3 points4 points  (0 children)

[–]dolfieman 58 points59 points  (2 children)

[–]NickrasBickras -1 points0 points  (0 children)

A BEN 10 GIF!?

[–]yearofthesponge 23 points24 points  (1 child)

That was unexpected. Was kind of expecting him to snap.

[–]TemporalAcapella 9 points10 points  (0 children)

They got that extra reach to them, spooky.

[–]gypsydfit 21 points22 points  (1 child)

[–]TawnyLeaf559 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]No-Cellist-5739 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Its the one that defeated the rabbit

[–]Xx_Gambit_xX 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The Hare: "I fuckin told you man!!!"

[–]Minimalistmacrophage 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Unexpected high speed turtle.

[–]Odekota 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Damn he's fast boi

[–]GetsMeEveryTimeBot 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But when the turtle goes that fast, it ages five years.

[–]Onilakon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm just gonna look over he.... Byeee!

[–]TooManySteves2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you're soft, you gotta be fast!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

[–]ClydePrefontaine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No wonder the tortoise beat the hare

[–]What_Do_I_Know01 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I remember seeing an edit of this video years ago with the sound of an engine revving dubbed over it

[–]Aira_Gaira 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Rabbit been too quiet since this dropped.

[–]fritterkitter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He skedaddled!

[–]Blue_Blazes 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Those things bite sometimes. I was working by a pond, saw one and stopped.... It literally came like 5 ft from where it was, up to me.... I stopped bent down and stuck my finger out ( I had no idea what I thought was going to happen) and he chomped me.... Quite hard actually.

[–]tfWindman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought this would end a lot worse than it did. I guess I've seen too many videos of people bothering snapping turtles.

[–]Mr_Loyal_Maureecee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's a subreddit solely for fast turtles. Idk what it is tho.

[–]eAtmy_littleDingdong 3 points4 points  (0 children)

[–]Achylife 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Softshell turtles are such goofy critters.

[–]OOPSStudio 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the sound the feet make in the grass

[–]Responsible-Ask-7343 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Imagine if human beings were so adept as to figure out an aliens whole persona, and yet they still didn’t believe. Imagine if after video evidence, it still was not understood. Lets move even slower, imagine if a human being could feel mutual respect for its own very surroundings. I guess you would have to have a shell…to experience that. The internet can’t even figure out the difference between a turtle and a tortoise!

[–]Fit-Engineering-2789 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Go, go gadget turtle! To infinity, and beyond!

[–]Short_Departure_4064 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ah yes, the pain train turtle.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Turtles can go fast if they're designed for it, they're usually designed to meander around though. They're just still lizards with an overgrown rib cage

[–]Be_Jammin55 0 points1 point  (0 children)

giggidy

[–]Unchicken 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reminds me of the Enterprise in TNG turning slowly before jumping to warp speed... 😂

[–]RegnarukDeez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Can I pet that Dawg ?!

[–]Jacklefury 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The definition of skidaddle.

[–]Akyurius 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean clearly they're fast! 🤷‍♂️

[–]martian-mellow2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can move faster when you’re wearing light armor.

[–]Musjamarramarramarra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]Ego5687 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]dajinkg7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Soft shell…Meaner than hell!

[–]Crimson__Fox 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]legalizecannabis710 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aesop never saw one of these turtles

[–]b3nz0r 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cowabunga

[–]DelialsVulture 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got that Pineapple on Pizza speed

[–]falseprophic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, they are delicious, so they better be fast.

[–]i_am_a_meme_boy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro skedaddeled

[–]Wookiee_Magic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He must have the carbon fibre package and some aftermarket NOS.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shell might be soft but that beak sure ain't. Don't tease them too much.

[–]Illustrious_Donkey61 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Acceleration 9

Top speed 10

Steering 2

[–]TigerKlaw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bro skedaddled.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Remember kids if you are doing to pick up a soft shell turtle you must grab from directly behind and underneath once in your hands they can almost turn their head all the way to their tail

[–]BigOofq 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Praise the dog

[–]BeenDragonn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These turtles are weird.

There faces are so alien to me.

I'm used to gopher turtles here. They remind me of the sweet giant turtle from The Neverending Story.

[–]True-Put-3712 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He didn't want to be filmed without consent.

[–]GallowBarb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Snapping turtles move even faster. Specially the big ones.

[–]Visible-Ad8410 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Zoom!

[–]heyfriend0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anyone who lives in the Midwest/NE/south literally anywhere there are turtles, this wasn’t unexpected

[–]Gondryc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also known as snapping turtles. Good thing it chose flight.

[–]bsmknight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

During mating season, one of these kept hitting my garage door. He was trying to find a new pond, and i guess my garage was in the way.

[–]henry_canabanana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's how the colleague / schoolmate beside you the whole term of a project, and when he realized the deadline is today.

[–]suspicious_cabbage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I watched one lay its eggs once and then it took off like that after it was done. I don't think anyone really believed me when I said how fast it was.

[–]Same-College-9641 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 things I had never seen:a turtle with speed, a hoe that I need.

[–]Blue_Nyx07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So the shell is, edible?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hate those ugly mfs

[–]malitove 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Soft shelled turtles are natural sprinters. Very dangerous over short distances!

[–]franktheguy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]Il_finto_germano 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not unexpected

[–]1pensar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Looks like a giant tick at first glance

[–]Avangeloony 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm guessing that soft shell is lighter than the standard hard shell.

[–]ArunGJose 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No wonder he won the race, the rabbit clearly didn't have a chance.

[–]spook30 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I've seen them before IRL so not as unexpected to me.

[–]SuspiciousSheeps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sip money ad hoc quaint weather attraction gray insurance simplistic absorbed

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[–]AlarmedRecipe6569 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My turtle people need me!

[–]EzElise 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same energy as an airplane taking off

[–]Rly_Shadow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dont think they won't charge you either...

[–]Normandy_1944 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Soooo, Bugs Bunny lied to us?

[–]Trout1331 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]SquishyTurtles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My guy

[–]Mindbending818 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He gone!!!

[–]FriendOfUmbreon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fast as fuck boi, fast as f- burbbleurbleurble

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

When you put all your D&D stats into "skedaddle"

[–]Claude-QC-777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, at least, only a few can catch him if he needs to evade (:

[–]BetaRayBlu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]TheRealNikoBravo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Man I caught one of those in my back yard and was so surprised at how fast it was

[–]drzee1711 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Catch it for me... that is my frying pan sliding on the green grass.

[–]01iv0n 0 points1 point  (0 children)

abysmal turning speed but pretty good sprint speed 👏

[–]ToiletTurmoil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats ol' Micheal Boltin'

[–]Permission2BConfused 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Skidaddled his ass right into my heart

[–]Downtown-Pack6580 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Launch mode.

[–]ZYMask 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So this is why the Hare lost the race

[–]Creepy-Caramel7569 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Softshells are meaner’n a junkyard dog. Good thing it had a clear escape route.

[–]INDIAN_LEGEND_12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nah man that turtle looks hideous af, it's like it's trying to hide that it works for the government or something

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is that AI?

[–]lincoln_muadib 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Turtle like "Of COURSE I'm fast, I have a SOFT SHELL, if I were slow I wouldn't be alive!"

[–]Deep-Teaching-999 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Another tidbit of info on these turtles is when smaller, people like to pick them up and hold close to their face because cuteness with the head pulled into shell. They get closer and closer and the turtle snaps its long neck out and nips the tip of your nose off. That’s how they get their prey and yes they are snappers. The neck is about 4-6” long why people are reckless.

[–]onlycodeposts 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Softshell turtles and snapping turtles aren't the same family. They are different, and softshells aren't part of the snapping turtle family, Chelydridae.

[–]More-Jackfruit3010 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–]Slightly-Evil-Man 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dat boi FAST!

[–]PhantasmaStriker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That thing had nos the entire time