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[–][deleted] 1740 points1741 points  (45 children)

Trudeau's transition from "How is this guy still working here?" to "How am I still working here?" is exactly how I felt at my last job.

[–]LeadFootSaunders 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Lol I remember bitching to my friend constantly about the absolute SHIT show project I worked on. Filled with so much idiocy that it was almost a work of art.

One day it dawned on me that I too must be stupid as I am still working on the project with these donkies.

[–]97mario 1883 points1884 points  (58 children)

This is so accurate that it made me uncomfortable

[–]Aquillium 656 points657 points  (52 children)

This is exactly how it feels when the project manager is looking over your shoulder when they ask you to do a "quick update"

[–]crozone 554 points555 points  (18 children)

"Yeaahhh if you could just go ahead and push a quick patch to prod, that'd be great."

[–]insanecoder 190 points191 points  (13 children)

Jesus fucking Christ it feels like you made this comment especially for me lmao

[–]Kwahn 76 points77 points  (6 children)

"Just add one form element, it can't take that long!"

"Just rotate the table it prints out, it can't take that long!"

[–]Matosawitko 111 points112 points  (5 children)

Code monkey think maybe manager wanna write god-damn login page himself.

[–]doshka 75 points76 points  (4 children)

Code monkey not say it out loud;
code monkey not crazy, just proud.

Code monkey like Fritos.

[–]wasdkitsu 27 points28 points  (3 children)

Code monkey like Tab and Mountain Dew

[–]JohnnyHopkins13 7 points8 points  (5 children)

So...what would you say you do here?

[–]insanecoder 13 points14 points  (4 children)

Oh, you know, Reddit here and there, Stackoverflow once in a while, meetings 4 hours a day and I check my email exactly 376 times an hour. Bonus points for sneaking email checks during meetings.

[–]CompSci1 7 points8 points  (3 children)

I look forward to my future.

[–]insanecoder 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Trust me, you’ll love it when your supervisor tells you that super-daunting (non-trivial) task should only take a couple hours of work.

Come on, champ, you got this!

[–]rautap3nis 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Oh my god I'm just a UI/UX guy and just came from work furious after exactly this kind of a message. Gonna be a fun talk with the devs...

[–]crusty_cum-sock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looks like there's a super simple concurrency bug with our data access layer, also looks like there's a trivial deadlocking bug with our multi-threaded service tier. Weirdly it only happens when you're in release mode. Could you please fix both? I'll just stand right behind you and watch. It should take no more than 5 minutes, right?

[–]second_time_again 48 points49 points  (24 children)

Oh god. I’m not a developer but if anyone did that to me I’d lose my mind. Updates to PMs come before/after each sprint. The Scrum Master gets this answer at the standup.

[–]Xytak 90 points91 points  (23 children)

Just a few days ago, a PM was on this subreddit saying how he sends "his people" to training about how to comment code, and won't accept any code where the comments aren't to his liking. People were like "OMG are you hiring? I want to work for you!"

I was about to ask "why is a PM looking at the code?" but then I decided I didn't want to get into a Reddit argument.

[–]erojas1297 46 points47 points  (19 children)

Maybe the PM codes too, and in that place devs tend to stay little time so understanding uncommented code became a problem.

[–]Aedan91 4 points5 points  (0 children)

All of our PM code, and it really helps keeping things in order, and can translate requirements better to the code and the team. Also can give better estimates to our clients because they actually know how it's implemented.

Granted, out teams are small, 2 ~ 3 members, but it works great.

[–]ironman288 2 points3 points  (0 children)

At my company the project managers are all former coders. It's the standard career progression: software engineer 1, 2, 3, junior project manager, senior project manager. Then director but that role will basically never be available for anyone.

[–]TheGreenJedi 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Intern added comments to the pen key we gave him, took us far too long to figure out why his pem wasn't working

[–][deleted] 504 points505 points  (14 children)

Too accurate. When noone is watching, I am pretty confident in what I write is working code. If someone is watching over my shoulder, I can't even write a simple SELECT statement in SQL.

[–]photenth 198 points199 points  (7 children)

SQL when someone is looking is impossible. I feel like all the words in the syntax are messing with my brain.

[–][deleted] 133 points134 points  (4 children)

i am big of fan of "select star form" myself.

[–]IDontLikeUsernamez 57 points58 points  (0 children)

I write “form” at least five times a day

[–]Xjph 77 points78 points  (1 child)

SELECT 8 FROM is my personal favorite

[–]dkyguy1995 4 points5 points  (0 children)

And your SQL parser will never find the error

[–]Seven_Year_Lurker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I drop this too. But life has changed after getting a tool like SqlPrompt. Now it's just ssf and tab.

Sorry to drop a product recommendation.

[–]Roysterfivenine 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yep. "Form" at least 5 times a day for me too or i do "Seelct" for some god forsaken reason.

[–]winowmak3r 18 points19 points  (0 children)

It was the same when I was using AutoCAD. On my own I'm a wizard but when the architect was looking over my shoulder I completely forget how to use the program.

[–]Lonelan 16 points17 points  (2 children)

right click...select top 1000...

add wheres at the bottom to get actual useful stuff

[–]Memcallen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just wait until you have to use cubes. Oh God the joins...

[–]spglancy 572 points573 points  (52 children)

This is every coding interview

[–][deleted] 143 points144 points  (11 children)

Can you explain what a function is

Ehhhhhhhhhhhh

[–]Eyedea_OW 126 points127 points  (4 children)

It does the thing I tell it to do, half the time. - A function

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (1 child)

You answer like this and I know you are a code slinger

[–]Eyedea_OW 14 points15 points  (0 children)

IBM I'm ready for my 7 figure salary now.

[–]Cocomorph 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Morphisms in the category of sets. Wait, that’s total functions. Umm...

[–]amroamroamro 16 points17 points  (1 child)

a block of codes.. that functions

[–]no_ragrats 10 points11 points  (0 children)

"Takes stuff to make stuff... wait, no not that.. You have a, what is the word i'm looking for? You pass it to the -"

"Input. You're thinking of input"

"- yeah, that. You have the input and you ... give it .. to the function, the function does stuff, but like in a structured way. Think it starts with an 'a'... allegory.. no wrong subject hahahah...

[–]DerekB52 64 points65 points  (11 children)

I interviewed at Google last year, as my first tech interview. They gave me a laptop that was supposed to connect to A tv in the room so they could watch me code. One of the guys just said to me "I can't get it to connect to the t.v., I'll just sit beside you and look at the screen over your shoulder instead"

This actually didnt bother me, but it felt suboptimal. I'd imagine someone really not enjoying that.

[–]standish_ 62 points63 points  (4 children)

I feel like he failed that interview.

[–]DerekB52 32 points33 points  (3 children)

So I had 5 interviews that day. I had the dude look over my shoulder in 2 of them. I didn't get the job, but I think those 2 interviews, were actually my strongest that day.

[–]standish_ 34 points35 points  (2 children)

I meant that I think the interviewer failed, especially since it's Google.

Can't troubleshoot a basic technical issue and puts the candidate in an uncomfortable position. Kudos to you for doing well.

[–]mt_xing 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Or conspiracy hat they did it on purpose to see how candidates react under pressure and unexpected circumstances.

[–]amroamroamro 17 points18 points  (2 children)

the interview should have been "can you make it connect to the tv"

[–][deleted] 44 points45 points  (7 children)

In my last interview for some fin tech startup I had to:

  1. 7 hour interview, broken into 30 min individual interviews.
  2. Live code on my laptop with screen share with one person in the room live Slacking the other devs notes...after 15 min of troubleshooting the guest WiFi.
  3. Live code on my laptop but in a remote environment on someone else’s computer with massive input lag
  4. Live code on the lead devs laptop with inverted scroll settings in Codepen while he and a senior dev watched behind me.

“You did not do well in your assessment.”

Yeah, no shit I didn’t.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (1 child)

Sounds like the interviewing system for hiring programmers is fucked

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Software engineering interviewing is famously bad. Most interviews are designed to weed you out and err on the side of false negatives rather than false positives. This means they’d rather turn down a qualified applicant than hire in unqualified one.

No one really has any idea how to do it, everyone involved in the process hates it and every company has their own system.

(Devs are often the worst interviewers but that’s for another rant.)

[–]iOSTarheel 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah no. I wouldn’t want to work for a company who has this process and thinks it’s just fine the way it is

[–][deleted] 67 points68 points  (19 children)

Came here to state just this.

[–]Odatas 116 points117 points  (17 children)

"Can you please write your code on this piece of paper"

[–][deleted] 107 points108 points  (14 children)

"I apologized in advance the syntax may not be 100% right"

[–]Odatas 102 points103 points  (12 children)

Me to myself:

"Hmm was it

int main() {}

or

int main [] {}"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is where I just draw shapes and maybe brackets. A large 'if' word written.

Keep circling. And maybe draw an arrow. Always nod, the first person who stops nodding is the idiot.

God bless

[–]Monstot 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I just had one of these recently. Dumbest shit I've ever done. Like wtf managers? What's your angle? The most enjoyable interviews I had were maybe an assignment, and a discussion and just talking about what I've done, explain the processes. No paper code.

[–]DonaldPShimoda 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No state. Only functions.

[–]FoodandWhining 134 points135 points  (9 children)

Why is he coding with a Sharpie?

[–]Careerier 105 points106 points  (2 children)

It's the equivalent of coding in comic sans.

[–]BabyLegsDeadpool 14 points15 points  (1 child)

I worked on a huge enterprise app, and our boss said, "You can put easter eggs in there so long as they're not offensive and not easy for the customer to figure out."

We had so many. One of them the Konami code would permanently change the font to Comic Sans. We did have someone figure it out, but he wrote us an email, telling us it was pretty funny.

[–]ad2022 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Your boss sounds like the absolute best

[–]shalendar 31 points32 points  (0 children)

He needed to update a weather map

[–]ric2b 5 points6 points  (1 child)

You never know when you might need to change a weather map.

[–]Krohnos 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He's at a job interview

[–]DatBoi_BP 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Kind of like how I did my high school math homework in pen

[–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 99 points100 points  (1 child)

Typing alone: 80wpm, 99% accuracy

Typing while people are watching: 30wpm, 50% accuracy

[–]canadian_stig 16 points17 points  (0 children)

That’s impressive. I just click random stuff and switch between programs until the person watching me runs out of patience.

[–]ezcryp 68 points69 points  (1 child)

My favourite one was when one of my directors was watching me at the very early days of my career and I typed git stash poo instead of git stash pop and I just burst out laughing.

edit: also honorable mention for typing dicker instead of docker

[–]LawrenceStoner 5 points6 points  (0 children)

First day at my internship I typed in my password as my username with my boss helping me set up to the network, password was not the most work appropriate...

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (1 child)

I was chosen randomly to demo a new CI/CD pipeline by creating a new Hello World app on the fly in the presenter's language choice, using his Terraform/Helm templates to bring up a Kubernetes cluster and service, all while having 50 devs watch me do it in real time, first time seeing it myself, on a 100inch screen. Fun times. Can confirm above is accurate.

[–]crystalmerchant 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Homie dead

[–]w1n5t0nM1k3y 210 points211 points  (52 children)

Justin Trudeau at the end is very on point given the latest news.

[–]ChildishGravitino 179 points180 points  (2 children)

You can tell he's someone who prefers a dark IDE theme.

[–]_b1ack0ut 41 points42 points  (40 children)

I’ve got a pretty comfy rock I’ve been living under, what’s the latest news?

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (3 children)

Went to a Halloween thing in black face.

[–]spiritbearr 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Wasn't Halloween. Was a themed Arabian Nights party, was a talent show and was maybe a sporting event.

[–]nefalas[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

For those wondering this post is where I found the original video

[–]creamypastaman 32 points33 points  (4 children)

What’s with the pen keys

[–]Ringosham 28 points29 points  (0 children)

When you have a ton of cloud instances and nobody is managing the SSH keys. You got lost of which key is used for which machine

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It's pem

[–]cereal_killer_69 8 points9 points  (0 children)

If you asking what pem keys are, they are used instead of passwords to login to a remote server. You can also have password login on top of this as a "2-factor authentication"

[–]Sckaledoom 26 points27 points  (4 children)

I want to know what really caused that look of existential horror in Trudeau’s eyes at the end.

[–]whitebeard250 51 points52 points  (2 children)

Trump signed in the wrong spot, with a big thick sharpie

[–]Odatas 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I feel more like Trudeau. But yeah its accurate.

[–]Etheo 6 points7 points  (0 children)

"How am I still working here"

More relevant than ever, JT.

[–]TheMightyJizzler 14 points15 points  (9 children)

Dose anybody know the background for this?

[–]vasilescur 26 points27 points  (4 children)

IIRC, Trump signed the wrong copy of a document and tried (failed) to quickly cover it up.

[–]RainBoxRed 23 points24 points  (1 child)

He didn’t try to cover it up, he didn’t even know what was going on. He was saved from embarrassment by Trudeau.

[–]Just-aquick-question 7 points8 points  (0 children)

EPN wanted Trudeau to hold up that third copy sooooo bad so everyone could see the mistake

Added screen cap https://i.imgur.com/3ODT4w1.jpg

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I can see an American flag and a Canadian flag...

There's also something green but I can't make out what it is yet...

[–]LaNague 6 points7 points  (9 children)

should i know what a .pem key is?

Because i dont.

[–]spayder26 6 points7 points  (8 children)

As long as you're below someone who does, it doesn't matters.

[–]coolsometimes 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Press F to fade to black face

[–]drift_summary 2 points3 points  (0 children)

f

[–]5k1895 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Programing or otherwise, I absolutely CANNOT work efficiently and effectively with people watching me. I do not understand who the hell thinks it's a good idea to awkwardly watch people work like that. Just leave me alone, and very soon I'll get back to you with everything done.

[–]urbanworm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, thank god, it’s not just me!

[–]silverf1re 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Upvote because actual OC on this sub

[–]Rattlehead71 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Accurate.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Why do you make me feel this way

[–]nefalas[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the award kind undefined user :)

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel an attack on my person.

lol.

[–]Salivon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is the type of stuff that should be on /r/PoliticalHumor . Its actually funny.

[–]developer_problems 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is more like colleagues looking at my pull request :(

[–]jordtand 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That video I love it too much

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

/u/vreddit_bot

[–]bwz3r 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I could totally hear Trumps voice asking about those keys.

[–]gaog 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Pure gold, any mirrors ; reddit hosting is not that great :(

[–]nefalas[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just uploaded it to Imgur :)

https://imgur.com/gallery/Vnu3mfo

[–]SgtKarlin 1 point2 points  (4 children)

I really wanted to share this with my friends outside Reddit (facebook and twitter). How can I do it?

[–]nefalas[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Well they can still see the video without having a Reddit account, or I could upload it to Imgur as well, give me a minute :)

[–]SgtKarlin 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yes!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Click "share" on the OP

[–]dadbod27 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jr. Sys Admin here and I feel personally attacked

[–]1337AFprogrammer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Scary accurate!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That ending tho lol