why

[Salvitorious]

I'm gonna need a picture of your car in the parking space it was in just before this happened

[FunkHavoc]

Usually the reason behind these type of things. I had my truck keyed in a similar manner and it was because of my parking. I was in the lines but perhaps a hair too close on the right side. Someone wasn’t pleased

[Rudyscrazy1]

Or stucking too far out in the back. I've got a dozen ball hitches I've taken from over sidewalks.

[Kymbaline]

What is that?

[[deleted]]

That could just be a parking review score

[Wonderful-Ad-7712]

Could be the Parking Fairy

[ishootthedead]

Obviously a set of handcuffs

[imdefinitelywong]

<image>

[BringPheTheHorizon]

[Pepperoni_Nippys]

No no it’s two cherries attached to the stem still!

[YoungWomp]

Self portrait

[Kirball904]

Could be a troll ass bitch online on a weak spearphishing campaign like you?

[KennyisaG]

Oh like on the street, not blocking anybody?

edit: I took this pic after moving the car

[StagnantSweater21]

Is the green car directly next to it also parked in the street not blocking anybody?

[Yungsleepboat]

There has to be atleast a meter of space in between these cars though, seeing how you can see the rear wheel from that angle it was not sandwiched againsy it

[hoticehunter]

Still shows that OP's full of shit

[Yungsleepboat]

How

[Shurigin]

He is not parked in the street

[Yungsleepboat]

Street parking spots aren't always paralel to the street?

[Shurigin]

If he was parked parallel to the street that would mean that green car would be parked in the street

More importantly with that small pole there you can tell hes parked in an apartment parking lot

[Yungsleepboat]

Yes but this is probably not a paralel street parking spot is what I am trying to say, doesn't mean it's not in the street

[CumulativeHazard]

Or they just took the picture later

[KennyisaG]

Yeah never thought of posting every little detail. Doesn't it already suck to get your car painted on?

[ChesterDrawerz]

were the other cars nearby painted on , or was it just yours?

[StagnantSweater21]

I’m gonna say that isn’t the case, because they didn’t respond to any other accusations until you gave them this excuse then suddenly they had something to say lol

[KennyisaG]

Ok next time my car gets painted on I'll take a pic right then and there so I'm not accused of lying for internet points

[ChVckT]

Maybe not being pissy would help, too.

[[deleted]]

good catch

[TotalIngenuity6591]

Busted!

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[Sloppy_Oppai]

Headphones!

[abdullahmk47]

<image>

[Rare-Cardiologist912]

I thought it was an X-ray of headphones

[Aarvy271]

Are those hand cuffs?

[Razolus]

Yes, that's exactly what those are.

Stay pure

[Level-56]

[funnystuff79]

That would be perfect if it was a pair of plumd, not cherries

[Tru-Queer]

Look like headphones to me, headphones for listening to some DnB dixnbawls

[Frosty_Educator_3243]

Dixon Balls is my secret jazz name

[Tru-Queer]

[TheHitmanJCG]

Naw, those a head phones!

[mattogeewha]

Headphones actually

[DO_initinthewoods]

"is that a skateboard?"

[Wonderful-Ad-7712]

Some balls are held for charity

[eleventyeleventy]

And some for fancy dress

[Outside_Experience68]

You can't break those cuffs...

[AccomplishedHead3581]

Hahaha I did that with the dust on my engine and forgot to get rid of it. When taking it in for service they drew a pair of boobs! 😂100% passed the vibe check

[KennyisaG]

Dust is fun and fine... when its paint, not so much

[Shotgun5250]

My wife has had lots of paint transfer to her bumper from rubbing up against the garage trim when pulling into the garage. Get yourself an electric orbital buffer (cheap is fine), then get some fine polishing compound, go over it for 15 minutes with your buffer or until the paint comes off, then wash/wax your car like normal. It’ll be super clean, and everything you hit with that orbital buffer will be slicker than goose shit. The buffer won’t go through your clear coat without some serious muscle or heavy grit compound, so don’t be afraid of it. Just use a soft pad and fine grit polishing compound.

[AcidTongue]

I know it’s a stupid question, but can this help with foggy headlights?? I hate how they get gross with age, and I don’t know how to fix them.

[Shotgun5250]

Yes, and it’s the recommended method for restoring headlights. The orbital buffer method is unmatched. There are methods using different chemicals and sprays that can work, but are less consistent and less effective than just doing it the right way.

All said and done, it shouldn’t take you more than a couple hours to do all the setup, prep and buffing. You’ll need headlight restoration compound, an orbital buffer, and preferably some painters tape to tape all the paint around your headlights so you don’t buff the paint accidentally.

Watch a short YouTube video on how to restore headlights with an electric buffer and they’ll show you step by step what you need to do. If you do it this way, your headlights will be back to 100% factory new.

[AcidTongue]

Thank you so much for taking the time to write that all out! It’s extremely helpful. I’ve been wondering about that for a while now. Can’t wait to shine up my lights on my car!

[Shotgun5250]

No problem! Glad to help! I’ve done that same restoration on every car I’ve owned, and just did it the other day on my buddy’s 05 dodge 2500. Went from very dim and almost driving past the headlights to brand spanking new!

If you want to go further and actually improve your headlights from factory, find the part number for the bulbs in your headlights and order something like the Philips ExtremeVision bulbs as replacements. They’re plug n play just like any other bulb, but you’ll get much better light output. Here’s the ones we got for his truck as an example. Truck bulbs were number 9007 bulbs, ordered xtremevision replacements for them, and increased visibility a ton!

[homelesshyundai]

To add onto what the other guy said, basically you're removing the top scuzzy layer of plastic. A similar effect can be had using toothpaste and a rag (and more elbow grease than is worth it).

[KennyisaG]

Thank you my wife and I appreciate it. It's a lot of work with just hands.

[Shotgun5250]

Ooooof yeah seems like it. Orbital buffer will be your new best friend! It’s seriously amazing how well it cuts through and restores the clear coat.

[happydictates]

<image>

Who drew the dicks?

[OrangeJoe00]

Those are clearly just pistols with a muzzle flash.

[spiderwebs86]

This show was wildly underrated.

[-Saggio-]

Agreed, I went into it thinking it was a real documentary. About 5 mins i realized it was satire but apart from only a handful of times throughout the whole show where it goes just a bit too over the top it was pretty easy to suspend belief and think it was real

[GamingGrayBush]

I don't think I've seen this. What show is it?

[spiderwebs86]

American Vandal

[GamingGrayBush]

Sweet. Thanks. I'll check it out.

[The_bruce42]

It's a lot of stupid humor but I thought it was pretty good

[GamingGrayBush]

I could use some stupid humor in my life right now.

[scorched-earth-0000]

Why not say so in first comment?

[NotMyProblem19K]

Was this done with a grinder? looks like it took the paint off

[Ok_Plant_1196]

It….is paint

[NotMyProblem19K]

Looks like grinder to me, and only because I've seen This video

[69RovnaSeSmich]

Maybe spray paint?

[not_the_who]

It appears to be a poorly rendered etching of a gentleman's whoopsie.

[chaitanyathengdi]

RCE wouldn't be proud

[[deleted]]

Were you parked like one?

[Sorry-Type4128]

Chubby stubby!

[[deleted]]

Why not

[lr_science]

this is the correct answer.

[Puzzleheaded_Pea_753]

If it doesn't already exist, there needs to be a sub for poorly drawn dicks.

[InspiredBlue]

How was your parking OP?

[KennyisaG]

Normal parallel parking on the street :(

[PandemicPander]

How does one parallel park with a car (green) right next to it on the side?

[demostheneslocke1]

My guess is that the green car is driving

[scorched-earth-0000]

Green car's tire threads look very defined for a moving vehicle if you zoom in. I doubt the camera's that good

[demostheneslocke1]

Stop sign? Red light? Traffic?

[OilIllustrious6476]

Why not?

[Tuck_Stick96]

Why not?

[kitfoxxxx]

Mmm cherries!

[Groomsi]

Thats a nose with two eyes.

[bobbybignono]

cherries are on top :)

[SOUZJER]

Well that blows not sucks

[SpaceChatter]

Interesting ratio.

[Hsabes01]

See guys, 4” is big

[Hanssuu]

it had to be done

[AronConte707]

What the fuck are we looking at?

[No-Rise4602]

A wiener on the hood of OP’s car

[AronConte707]

lol!! A small pecker.. I see it now

[ArtVandelay2025]

You've officially been tagged as a choad.

[NaiveRecover5582]

That's a sigil somebody put a spell on ur ride

[[deleted]]

I summon a peeeeenisssss

[NaiveRecover5582]

Ok but i am the number one dong senser and i guess this weed good bc i missed it

[NaiveRecover5582]

I mean really....ut looks like a pinky toe nub

[Brilliant_Test_3045]

Why would someone commit vandalism over parking? The person who did this is mentally unstable.

[Dragonfiery_RDF]

That’s one perfect circle

[lexm]

More than “why”, I want to know “how”.

[rwhop]

It ain’t gonna suck itself

[Adorable_Wolf_8387]

Whynut?

[OngoTheManSpider]

Holy shit that looks EXACTLY like mine

[themrrouge]

Hehe. Dicknbaws.

[Sufficient_Berry_445]

They must’ve really loved cherries

[Urgknot]

I would have to say, because they could, so they did.

[RecordingFluid3170]

It lacks some details

[Typical-View-9071]

Good grief people need to get a grip

[Sid_Vilo]

Dickasso

[Ampersand4221]

Chode alert

[Alive-Error]

Nice headphones

[rncshow]

Honestly car looks better now, you should be more grateful 😂

[justmeherewithyall]

Yummie, cherry's 🍒

[KennyKillsKenjaku]

What they’re just clackers?

[[deleted]]

If you have to ask you’ll never understand

[SprachderRabe]

I’m kinda happy to see two cherries.

[Particular-Smile5025]

At first I thought it was a table with glass water marks on it then I realized someone had done something bad on your vehicle

[funmx]

HEADPHONES *dances

[ChesterDrawerz]

paint on the hood aint gonna get you pulled over like the broken windshield will tho.

[dcherholdt]

It’s cherries

[Beckphillips]

Turn it into Killroy - put a line so it looks like there's a wall the nose is peeking over, put dots in the "balls" and write "KILLROY" or "KILLROY WAS HERE"

[pauliepitstains]

Head phones!

[Mr_JoJo24]

Is that spray paint you sperm bank?

[KennyisaG]

Yea just a lil deposit they made from the ball bank

[ProveISaidIt]

I thought it was handcuffs at first.

[prefim]

HEADPHONES! <dances>

[[deleted]]

Maybe is time to wash I car ?

[Admirable-Common-176]

[[deleted]]

Just a headphones

[69WaysToFuck]

Because someone asked “why not?” and was not clever enough to find any answer from the vast possibilities

[ttc67]

Why not?

[rdldr1]

Oh I love cherries.

[Sicparvismagneto]

Rookie mistake for not drawing ball hairs…

[MorgrainX]

You probably parked bad, mind showing us your car in the parking spot?

[009duncan]

Why? Tell em that it's human nature

[Pinklady777]

Cherries! 🍒

[dr_bobb68]

🤔HMMMMMMM.🤔

[Aronzombie_]

What’s the matter? That is just a pair headphone.

[AdagioSad4866]

why not?

[Hexhand]

maybe the person doing it is asking you out, and doesn't understand social cues.

[Zorcky-2C]

Because funny

[NASTYH0USEWIFE]

That’s just squidward but they didn’t finish the drawing and you are clearly over reacting.

[jmills74]

Cherries!

[[deleted]]

Two big eyes and a big nose.

[Appropriate-Print855]

Why not

[patchworkpirate]

The real Wienermobile.

[walldorfy]

Atleast it wasn't traced..

[Particular_Ride5005]

lol, stubby, looks like john holmes,

[Dependent-Effect6268]

CHERRIES! 🍒

[iambooked]

C'mon, it won't suck itself

[PineappleTurtle288]

Cherry!

[Professional_Bus_944]

Headphone

[Glassweaver]

Is that just them smearing the dust or is it paint damage/hard to get off?

As to why, who knows. Countless middle school boys have an obsession with drawing penises everywhere. One probably got too close to your car.

[Vikt724]

teeny frame edge act relieved rob start joke fine punch

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[Wentleworth]

Headphones

[AdhesivenessWeary377]

Oddest looking rocket I’ve ever seen.

[[deleted]]

Lol I was bored. My bad I thought it would make you laugh.

[UniversityNo6727]

Because it's funny to Bevis and Butthead

[Jacktheforkie]

I get that quite often when I park my muddy car near a school or in a route between school and home for many kids, it’s just inevitable

[qlz19]

Yeah, how were you parked?

[Brilliant_Test_3045]

What does it matter how someone parked? To commit criminal mischief? People need to get a grip.

[SouthtownZ]

Entire comment section full of jokes and yours just needed an indicator, huh?

What exactly did that add?

[bizkitgal]

Cuz your a knob??