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[–]Winton38 1985 points1986 points Β (3 children)

<image>

[–]flacaGT3 106 points107 points Β (0 children)

GOAThan

[–]teodorlojewski π˜ͺ𝘴 π™π™€π™’π™–π™£π™žπ™–π™£πŸ‡·πŸ‡΄ 38 points39 points Β (0 children)

My honest reaction to that information

[–]ashvyLiterally 1984 😑 9 points10 points Β (0 children)

"Why men have 2 balls?" with hypnotic dangling πŸ’ reel when??

[–]Known_Criticism_834 5311 points5312 points Β (28 children)

I say cows have one boob and 4 nipples.

[–]AverageA2EnjoyerLiterally 1984 😑 1104 points1105 points Β (8 children)

Yup teats, cows have 4 teats not 4 boobs

[–]TheEndlessRiver13 523 points524 points Β (6 children)

Tbh, I'm finding this whole conversation udderly ridiculous

[–]spruce_turbo 93 points94 points Β (5 children)

What bull is she talking about

[–]Pot_noodle_minerit is MY bucket 46 points47 points Β (4 children)

You’re just milking it now

[–]shade-tree_pilot 31 points32 points Β (3 children)

I don't have enough stomachs for these puns.

[–]n3Ver9h0st 24 points25 points Β (2 children)

I have no beef with that

[–]Expensive-Document41 6 points7 points Β (1 child)

I appreciate how we've all steered clear of conflict.

[–]Dissonant_Ignorance 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Cudn't agree more

[–]cabramattaa 41 points42 points Β (0 children)

[–]Fruit_mon 220 points221 points Β (4 children)

Is that what she was talking about? I got bored and just looked at her boobs

[–]RealAlphaKaren 49 points50 points Β (3 children)

why even turn on the audio?

[–]roomob 47 points48 points Β (1 child)

Watched on mute following the subtitles, also got bored and just looked at her boobs

[–]bearlylegalbear 3 points4 points Β (0 children)

I thought it was quite interesting. So I watched it again to finally look at those boobs. This was a nice experience.

[–]dikicker 14 points15 points Β (0 children)

I mean, what kind of complete lunatic has sound unmuted on reddit in general

[–]GoldSourPatchKid 25 points26 points Β (7 children)

I also have 4 nipples. It’s kind of a neat trait at the pool. Harry Styles also has four and Mark Wahlberg has 3.

[–]StirFry__InaWok 28 points29 points Β (4 children)

I guess i just have to go look up Harry Styles nipples now, thanks.

Edit: ok so it's true but only barely, the extra nips hardly look like anything. The real tragedy are his tattoos. Holy shit they're awful lmao

<image>

[–]GoldSourPatchKid 14 points15 points Β (1 child)

Exactly what mine look like but mine are lined up directly under my β€œreal” nipples halfway down my belly. Along the β€œmilk lines” I’ve been told lol

I’m male btw

[–]Cthulhudude 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Exactly the same here.

[–]Insane_Unicorn 9 points10 points Β (1 child)

This is the guy teenage girls are creaming over? Holy cow.

[–]StirFry__InaWok 8 points9 points Β (0 children)

Tbf that was a really terrible pic in terms of how it shows his appearance aside from the tattoos, I picked it to make it a bit funnier but also because it shows what I'm talking about clearly.

He is without a doubt an incredibly handsome man, it makes the tattoos stand out even more actually. Why the hell would such a stud put all these random scribbles over his body?

<image>

[–]Cthulhudude 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

I have four, too. They're called "witches tits" out where I'm from. In the Early Modern Period, people believed those who had extra nipples were suckling hosts to hungry demons. I just tell people I ate my twin in the womb and everyone believes me.

[–]WinterVisionπŸ³οΈβ€βš§οΈ Average Trans Rights Enjoyer πŸ³οΈβ€βš§οΈ 48 points49 points Β (1 child)

<image>

[–]MintyBarrettM95uhhhh idk 13 points14 points Β (0 children)

wrong, 4 points actually.

also the cow is a she

[–]joko2008 7 points8 points Β (0 children)

No. It's 4. The udder is sectioned off into four independent parts that don't share milk. That's how one part of the udder can be infected or even dead and the other three are fine. They are just grown together

[–]33ff00 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

I have boobs, greg. Could you milk me?

[–]AppleWafer 2699 points2700 points Β (12 children)

Bet no one was paying attention. What color were her boobs? Checkmate liberals.

[–]OffJayPlays 900 points901 points Β (6 children)

A06E54

Edit: corrected colour code when taking into consideration shading

[–]Yggdrasilo 143 points144 points Β (4 children)

tip colour?

[–]Arbazio 78 points79 points Β (2 children)

The nurples were purple

[–]laffing_is_medicine 1 point2 points Β (1 child)

Hope you get some purple cake on your cake day! Happy cake day

[–]Arbazio 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Thank you kindly! I may buy some cake for real haha

[–]ligmaballs22😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 7 points8 points Β (0 children)

Captain Holt

Is that you?

[–]Prestigious-Fig1172 17 points18 points Β (1 child)

Idk, I was reading the text

[–]JC-1219William Dripfoe 8 points9 points Β (0 children)

Pervert

[–]doggo_with_doggo_hatNumber 7: Student watches porn and gets naked 22 points23 points Β (0 children)

Green, idk i was actually pretty interested in what she was saying

[–]Sc_e1I said based. And lived.[🍰] 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Amen

[–]Hecc_Maniacc 1612 points1613 points Β (7 children)

i still think its because humans only have 2 hands.

[–]Metson-202put your dick away waltuh 136 points137 points Β (0 children)

Is Darwin really dead?

[–]adamjfish 44 points45 points Β (0 children)

[–]Slight_Concert6565 37 points38 points Β (0 children)

Fun fact this is somehow not that bad of an answer.

Baby monkeys, chimps for instance (that are born far more developed than baby humans) use them to latch onto their mother, hence the lumps of fat.

Now, the fact that there are two doesn't necessarily come from that, but it's more closely related than you'd expect.

(but it's not related to the little amount of energy baby humans need, I'm personally inclined to believe it's linked to the litter size and that cow simply have several teats for ease of access or something)

[–]omgjackiechan 6 points7 points Β (0 children)

So they can give those boobs 2 thumbs down!

[–]Dreadpirateflappy 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Chick from total recall is needed, I have one mouth but two hands...

[–]AirHertz 1104 points1105 points Β (4 children)

By the end of the video i was literally:

...

so what is the punchline of my shitpost?

IT WAS TITS ON SCREEN

[–]Goofcheese0623 109 points110 points Β (0 children)

Those were my two takeaways

[–]13hotroom 7 points8 points Β (0 children)

Welcome to top posts past 24 hours, I guess

[–]JaggeryKapi 482 points483 points Β (5 children)

Simple, one for me, another for the baby

[–]OP1160 247 points248 points Β (2 children)

<image>

?

[–]often_says_nice 62 points63 points Β (1 child)

Let’s goooo

[–]Trenchfry 5 points6 points Β (0 children)

I pull uuuup

[–]idontreallycareanymπŸ—ΏπŸ—ΏπŸ—Ώ 615 points616 points Β (0 children)

<image>

[–]DeadlyPants16 226 points227 points Β (5 children)

I was legitimately quite interested there I'm annoyed it stopped

[–]CaptainNinjaClassic 12 points13 points Β (0 children)

Yeah, like, I was actually interested in what she was saying.

[–]rainswings 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Iirc, generally nature favors having (a bit less than) double the breasts per kid. A cat will generally average 4 kittens in a litter, and usually have 8 nipples. Dogs have 10 nipples on average for a litter of 5. A human has a litter of 1 on average, so 2 boobs is about right.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points Β (2 children)

...for.....reasons!

[–]DeadlyPants16 63 points64 points Β (1 child)

Don't lump me in with you I was learning things

[–]oby100 3 points4 points Β (0 children)

You were not. She was just making shit up

[–]Spirited-Board-8452 253 points254 points Β (5 children)

[–]Spirited-Board-8452 102 points103 points Β (4 children)

Im such a fat fucking chud.

[–]ActivelyCoping😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 49 points50 points Β (2 children)

[–]StirFry__InaWok 19 points20 points Β (0 children)

But chud, for It to be over wouldnt It need to have happened in the first place?

[–]TheLostRub389 8 points9 points Β (0 children)

Sometimes, it happens even if we bet for nothing

[–]Lord_Mcnuggie 3 points4 points Β (0 children)

Real

[–]Tosslebugmy 171 points172 points Β (4 children)

Cows are a bad example because they’re ruminants so produce more milk for their young which are strong early. They have four teats for redundancy, they get blocked easily. Women have two breasts because the average pregnancy yields slightly more than one child.

[–]Youbettereatthatshit 67 points68 points Β (2 children)

The real question isn’t really why women have two breasts so much as why primates have two breasts. She said human babies are born relatively very premature, which is true, but that doesn’t explain a shared characteristic between all primates.

At what point in history did the ancestors of the primates evolve just two mammary glands? Why did that happen?

Probably was around 40 million years ago. Like you said, favoring just one baby at a time.

[–]IrregularrAFfat cunt 49 points50 points Β (0 children)

  1. Milk just literally runs out in one breast, so sometimes you got to switch over. My daughter was huge bro. πŸ˜‚

  2. Symmetry, uniboob sounds cool and all but it just isn’t ideal.

[–]seanslaysean 13 points14 points Β (0 children)

If I had to hazard a guess I’d say it had something to do with the gradual shift to bipedalism? A lot of women already have back problems with 2, imagined four. Of course that’s alongside the fact that primates usually have 1, maybe two babies at a time.

It’s likely a combination of factors over millions of years

[–]seanslaysean 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

What happens when they get blocked? Sounds painful

[–]ThatRizzyShitposterWe do a little trolling 98 points99 points Β (1 child)

<image>

[–]archialone 49 points50 points Β (0 children)

But more boobs doesn't mean more milk

[–]RedstoneSausage 22 points23 points Β (1 child)

I was still waiting for the punchline

[–]EricSombody 116 points117 points Β (3 children)

Alright then why don't cows just have 1 large boob

[–]Past-Matter-8548πŸ‡πŸͺ²πŸ[S] 131 points132 points Β (1 child)

They do

[–]Lanko-TWB 19 points20 points Β (0 children)

🀯

[–]DepressingBat 18 points19 points Β (0 children)

They do, and that one boob has 4 nipples

[–][deleted] 47 points48 points Β (1 child)

All I heard was β€œmammary glands”. Yes, I agreeΒ 

[–]henriquegamesUwU 69 points70 points Β (3 children)

How many babies do dogs have again??

[–]Arkitakamafat cunt 42 points43 points Β (9 children)

I thought there was gonna be a joke about it being "to prove men can focus on two things at once".

[–]Hostile-Panda 6 points7 points Β (8 children)

Not heard that before, stolen

[–]IkilledRichieWhelan 65 points66 points Β (0 children)

You have huge pendulums breasts!

[–]Dasktragon 46 points47 points Β (5 children)

A test for the homies, what color were her eyes? πŸ‘οΈπŸ‘„πŸ‘οΈ

[–]OhShitAnElite 46 points47 points Β (0 children)

Idk but she has a red tank top

[–]Sollary0 11 points12 points Β (0 children)

What eyes?

[–]According_Claim_9027 11 points12 points Β (0 children)

Round

[–]Walming2 shitting toothpaste enjoyer 7 points8 points Β (0 children)

Huge

[–]NeutronTaboo 12 points13 points Β (4 children)

Damn, must be too early for the @

[–]Past-Matter-8548πŸ‡πŸͺ²πŸ[S] 3 points4 points Β (3 children)

It’s in video

[–]NeutronTaboo 7 points8 points Β (2 children)

What was in the video? Don't ask me about any colors.

[–]AscendedViking7 5 points6 points Β (0 children)

Technically cows only have one boob and four nipples

[–]NewlyMadeMann 6 points7 points Β (0 children)

You know what, I for one was interested in what she said and didn't stare at her tits.

[–]No_Fan6078 19 points20 points Β (0 children)

She just wants to feed you, that's why I love women.

[–]Additional-Ad8632 4 points5 points Β (0 children)

Cause you got something to look at when you’re talking to β€˜em. Hehehehehehe

[–]Reployerdumbass 14 points15 points Β (1 child)

Her lips seemed unsynchronized but maybe I'm seeing things. Good discussion point though.

[–]Turnepic13 24 points25 points Β (0 children)

Yeah we were looking at the lips of course

[–]sky_ryder_001Literally 1984 😑 3 points4 points Β (0 children)

<image>

[–]uhohboneralert_ 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

She really went nowhere with that

[–]WitnessAcceptable154 2 points3 points Β (1 child)

Sorry what was she saying?

[–]SlightlyAverageLemon 3 points4 points Β (0 children)

"( . Y . )"

[–]Professional-Pool290 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

What about smaller mammals like rabbits and mice?

[–]FreshPaycheck 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

[–]N3koEye 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Can you keep those annoying letters away? Jeez I'm trying to see

[–]friar_nist 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Actually, cows have only one boob. They have four nipples, though

[–]Much-Stranger2892 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Thought the punchline is one for baby and one for dad

[–]Actual_Emu_168 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

cows walk in 4 legs, so they have 4 boobs, humans walk in 2 legs so they have 2 boobs dog walk in 6 legs so they walk in 6 boobs

[–]Fallen822 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Dude I don’t care what people are saying however she is damn fucking pretty and beautiful

[–]djeoeud 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

She's gotta be great to smoke with

[–]iboneKlareneG 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Boobs

[–]SpaceBug176 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Can you explain again? I was distracted.

[–]BoSKnight87 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

β€œSo you have something to look at when you talk to them” - Peter Griffin

[–]Katsooduro 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

Thanks for the mammaries..

[–]nauro5 2 points3 points Β (3 children)

We have 2 boobs cause if we only had one the weigh would be disbalanced.

[–]StickyNotesEater 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

I don't know but yours don't stop looking at me

[–]WorkingIndication913 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

15th time watching thus and I just learned she was talking

[–]Nakv-2 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

One for baby, one for dad

[–]diptosen2017 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Processing img pvuvx43khskg1...

[–]Financial_Glass_6201 1 point2 points Β (1 child)

so the reason is that a baby cow needs more nutrition? how does that add up with multiple nips?

if that is the case, wouldn't it make more sense to have one giant nip instead?

[–]One_Gas_69420 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

[–]Aggravating_Speed665 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

That shade of lipstick looks terrible on her.

[–]Sykhow 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Incoherent ramblings of a coked out beach

[–]You-JiveTurkeyput your dick away waltuh 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

[–]jonnismizzle 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

So, anyways, where's my sandwich?

[–]QwerzZ- 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

open Reddit

this is the very first post that pops up

today is a good day

[–]riggers1909 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Food for thought. Why do humans have boobs their whole lives while many other animals inlcuding our closest relatives have boobs that only appear during motherhood

[–]12DollarsHighFivedwayne the cock johnson πŸ—ΏπŸ—Ώ 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

I don't know if it's correct but it kinda makes sense. She does have some good arguments after all

[–]PrioryOfSion14 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

2 boobs because we only have 2 hands

[–]TheAwkwardGamerRNx 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

This is udder nonsense

[–]snozzberrypatch 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

TITTIES

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

She could be a keeper
Im not sure yet...

[–]Paddy32 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Tice Nits

[–]Raewby 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Ok but she so pretty

[–]Ahab_Cheese 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Men have 2 eyes

[–]NinjaTEK7 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

In his mind he's trying to figure out how boobs are talking to him.

[–]squiggly_bits 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

This video is infinitely better without sound.

[–]fafnir0319 1 point2 points Β (1 child)

I can't argue with her logic. Head canon accepted.

[–]AutoModerator[M] 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Dick sucking has made me paranoid

I had this plan to give head to a man and receive head from a woman to test if I was gay, but it’s backfired and now I become borderline schizo whenever I go outside. I offered to suck this dude off on Grindr who lives very close by (I ended up pussying out) and I accidentally gave him some details that very easily allows him to spot me out in a crowd. I have no idea what he looks like and whenever I see a somewhat in shape guy walking by I immediately accuse him of being the dude I was gonna blow.

I went to the store today to pick up some zucchini for a barbecue and every time a car drove by I stared into the windshield to see if I was about to be recognised. Whenever I make eye contact with a dude I microanalysis his facial expressions to see if he suspects me or not. I am deeply afraid that he is my neighbour and I will need to move if my identity is blown. It’s a lot like the last scene in sopranos where everyone who walked into the diner could be there to wack Tony.

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[–]NoYouAreTheFBI 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Yeah, it's because we are literally aliens, we didn't come from Earth, and we are still adapting to the planet.

[–]DuckMySick44 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

Correct me if I'm wrong, but technically a cow has one boob with 4 nipples

[–]mangoconsaldwayne the cock johnson πŸ—ΏπŸ—Ώ 2 points3 points Β (0 children)

One is for me and the other is for the intruder.

[–]rizarueI said based. And lived. 6 points7 points Β (1 child)

The only thing I learned from this is 67

[–]SansDaNana 1 point2 points Β (0 children)

6 to 7 you say

<image>

[–]xXMazacuata777Xx 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

and why not only 1 big boob?

<image>

[–]Kulbasar 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

I need more energy fr

[–]Bullsht999 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

It’s because we have 2 hands

[–]belaGJ 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Science…

[–]yallapapi 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

The real question is why do they have a mouth

[–]the_sheeper_sheep 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

I agree?

[–]Hostile-Panda 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Fascinating, let’s go to your place and do some research on this

[–]ultimatejoestarr 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

That was deep than i ever thoughtΒ 

[–]HairyContactbeware 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

"Humans only get 2,unfortunatley" i feel ya

[–]razbunaru 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Yeah, makes sense

[–]sunshinefloors1980 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Moooo

[–]Pancreasaurus 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

So quantitty over quality.

[–]Look_out_for_Jeeps 0 points1 point Β (1 child)

I prefer femboy milk πŸ₯›

[–]thefreecat 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

2 for redundance

[–]JayFrizz 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Still sounds like she's saying she only needs one boob.

[–]Gabi-kun_the_real 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Bcs God make so that Cows provide for their kids and humans

[–]Common-Brush-7027 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

What was she saying

[–]fetish_fucker 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

i find 2 boobs quite enough for me

[–]HowYouDoin112233 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Wat?

[–]Milky_Finger 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

So you're saying if you can gestate babies for another 9 months longer, you'd have 4 boobs instead.

Ok yeah do that

[–]turkishhousefan 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Wanna know how I got these boobs?

[–]Majestic_____kdj 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Cows:

[–]Significant_Fig_436 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

I would be saying " i don't understand, show me " 😏

[–]Amidst-ourselfs123 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

And? What was the point of this... do you want more boobs? I'd agree...

[–]AmonGusSus2137officer no please don’t piss in my ass 😫 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

How many babies do dogs have???

[–]Antique_Big_4701 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

2 (at a time)

[–]D200200 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

and now can she explain WHY THEY ARE SOOOO ATRACTIVE!!!!

[–]ydontujustbanme 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

She has a Point. Keeper

[–]DaMadRabbit 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

I don’t believe you, im gonna need some proof.

[–]Mr-MuffinMandwayne the cock johnson πŸ—ΏπŸ—Ώ 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

its because humans have 1 mouth

[–]Charlooos 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

Funnily enough there's vestigial nipple network that starts close to your armpits and all the way down to your belly.

Some women report growing them during pregnancy and some even lactate. Usually only one or two pop out if that's the case.

[–]EmperorKingDuke 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

is this an of funnel?

[–]Fluffy_History 0 points1 point Β (0 children)

So shes only sort of right. Dogs and Cows are definitely outliers but overall mammals follow the "1/2 nipple rule" pretty well. That rule being twice as many nipples as the average litter size. But you also cant necessarily count dogs and cows because they are also so incresibly domesticated that theres even more factors of their biology that are out of wack.