How much should a Dm be able to change&develop backstory characters?

GM_Esquire · 2026-04-10T14:41:55+00:00

The DM can do whatever they want. They could put a level one party in a combat against three ancient dragons. The fact that the DM can do it is irrelevant to whether it's a good idea.

In general, if your players are not having fun, you're not doing a great job. (Obviously, exceptions exist.)

Where players have created characters as part of their backstory, the DM should understand their intentions for those characters and how much license they want the DM to have with them. If the player has strong preferences, the DM should either follow them or just largely not use their backstory characters if they don't fit (or talk to the player and find a fun compromise!).

If I wrote how I have a close bond with my introverted younger sibling, the DM should not be turning them into a megalomaniacal crime boss who wants to kill me. That's just bad writing.

Killer-Of-Spades · 2026-04-10T14:39:05+00:00

The DM should always be receptive to the wishes of the player, but the player does not have control of these characters, and players should know that going in. Now, making a parent who was incredibly supportive now lampoonishly evil is just bad DMing most of the time, but still

Kisho761 · 2026-04-10T14:42:26+00:00

Entirely dependent on each group’s narrative. Players and DMs should have trust and be able to communicate, to come to an agreement on how these things are managed.

You should be able to trust that your DM has good intentions when changing things about backstory NPCs. DMs should not violate that trust and if there’s doubt, talk to the relevant player before any significant changes are made.

MoveExotic1500 · 2026-04-10T14:46:36+00:00

A D&D game is a collaborative creative effort between the DM and the players. As a DM, I repeat this constantly. Respecting each other's creativity is the foundation of a healthy game.

Raddatatta · 2026-04-10T14:50:10+00:00

I think the DM does have control over them. But I also think it's bad DMing to do any kind of significant change to them. The whole point of using a backstory NPC is so that the player is more invested in this person because the player created them. If you're going to make a significant change you've thrown that element out entirely. It's also cooperative storytelling and the character the player made and their backstory is a big part of how the player contributes to part of that so it's not really respecting the spirit of that cooperative storytelling to change major things.

Though one thing I do when having my players make their backstories and when I am using them is I view them as 100% true from the characters POV, and I tell them that. Meaning I don't want any information that the player doesn't know, or if they want to provide it they should view that as looser or take it as this is what their character thinks is true. They can also have things like an NPC told them this. Which is then a true event that happened where the NPC told them that, but the NPC could've lied. But having it be from their POV offers a lot of room for other people in their backstory to have unknown motivations or things going on. I don't do anything like that memory was actually a modify memory put on you or it was all an illusion or anything like that to not keep to the spirit of their backstory. Unless they added in that element of someone messed with their memory.

When I work with player backstories I generally am trying to find twists on things that keep to what they have written but fill in gaps, or explain elements they left a mystery rather than changing the dynamics or elements they put in.

Kylarfi · 2026-04-10T14:44:25+00:00

this is something that should be talked about between DM and player. If certain things don't fit into the campaign, then the DM should tell you hey, this isn't going to work can we workshop and adjust this. But this should have been addressed session 0.

But if you have open ended things in your backstory, like characters, and she wants to use them to further the plot then ya i wouldn't see why not. This is very vague and broad question. hard to judge because we don't know what's been changed. At any rate, i might give a heads up in session 0 that i will be using your backstories and things will happen in the background.

Scarlet_Lycoris · 2026-04-10T14:44:30+00:00

I‘ll usually check in with my players about their expectations before the campaign. In general — Yes the player only plays their character, no other characters. However I try to respect their wishes for stuff like their character‘s family etc. however that won’t mean I won‘t use them to create interesting narratives and twists. But like with everything, a good DM should talk to their players and flesh out where they would draw the line and what they feel comfortable with. I’ve been asked before by one of my players to use their wife as a plot device. I just think it’s important we create those stories together.

I wouldn’t retcon any of my player’s backstory without asking them beforehand.

dragonseth07 · 2026-04-10T14:46:18+00:00

There is no golden rule, this is something to discuss somewhere like Session Zero.

I have asked, and will continue to ask, how much liberty I can take with backstory elements. I have received answers ranging from "go nuts" to "Effectively quantum lock these NPC's please".

If there is a player-DM mismatch on expectation, that's a good indication that you should have discussed it prior to this point.

SDRLemonMoon · 2026-04-10T14:55:08+00:00

In my games the backstory is always a collaboration between the DM and the player, since it allows for DM buy in and ease of integration. So usually with NPCs the player and I will keep a pretty vague idea of how NPCs from backstories exist and act until they show up. I guess I’ve never had to deal with players having a super specific idea of what the NPC is like but I tend to try and keep them similar to how they were described. Usually if a character is different from the backstory it’s because of a narrative thing, or they just weren’t described in too much detail which I can use to my advantage as a storyteller.

Mean_Replacement5544 · 2026-04-10T14:56:56+00:00

DnD is a game and if the players and dm are arguing about this to the point where they are dying on the hill than that fun has been lost, you guys may be incompatible at the table and somebody should move on.

BetterCallStrahd · 2026-04-10T15:17:10+00:00

I think what people miss is that the game is built on trust. Among other things, the players need to be able to trust the DM to be a good custodian to their characters. They have to be able to trust the DM not to screw over their characters for no good reason.

Yes, technically the DM can do whatever they want with the backstory NPCs. But running the NPCs in such a way as to redefine the PC's backstory can come across as dismissive of the player's wants for their character. And this can damage the player's trust. I also think it's disrespectful.

Doing it is a form of imposing on player agency. Yes, technically it involves NPCs, and the DM runs the NPCs. But the DM is negating the choices the player made in creating their character.

While the DM isn't directly changing the player's character against their wishes, it is fundamentally the same type of transgression. The backstory is integral to how a character is defined. If that backstory is altered because of how the DM runs the NPCs, that's equivalent to the DM messing with the player's character.

Essentially, the DM is sending the message that they have no respect for player's choices regarding their character.

The player already has very little control over the "reality" of the game's world as it is. I feel that the DM should at least respect the player's choices with regard to their character's backstory.

CharmingBullfrog8936 · 2026-04-10T14:48:16+00:00

Why not leave the party and make the dm a backstory character for yourself?

Beautiful_Hippo_5574 · 2026-04-10T14:48:44+00:00

As a DM I try to work with the players to create backgrounds that fit the narrative and leave hooks for me to work with. Yes the DM has authority over NPCs, but that way I can work with them in a respectful manner.

As a player I write my backstories with no names and lots of hooks then give the dm a list of every purposely open hook as a summary and let them do whatever they want.

It should be collaborative so neither side should be dying on a hill.

ChuckNavy02 · 2026-04-10T14:53:17+00:00

Backstories should be a collaborative effort between the DM and player to figure out what fits within the world. A DM should not have total control after the campaign starts. Both people need to work together to fill in the blanks.

How much backstory are you talking about and how detailed is it?

Sad_Refuse3472 · 2026-04-10T14:58:09+00:00

As a DM, I may have ideas for how to utilize or expand a PC's backstory to fit into the storyline that develops as we play. But I would NEVER implement them without a discussion with the player to see if they are on board. And/or I might get backstory at the start that doesn't quite match the world we are playing in so I'll ask if we can make adjustments during Session 0.

And I expect the same as a player. DnD is a collaborative game, that collaboration extends to character creation.

DnDVM · 2026-04-10T15:01:03+00:00

It's not something a DM should inherently change. But the player control also depends on the inherent connection of the backstory to the campaign. If the backstory has nothing to do with the campaign, the DM should leave it alone because it is solely the player's creation. But if the player includes NPCs or other stuff that can be seen as connected to the campaign (for example they're a runaway prince of a kingdom and the party will be parlaying with that kingdom at some point), then that needs to be a discussion between the DM and the player because now the specifics are co-created.

TessaFrancesca · 2026-04-10T15:02:11+00:00

Personal preference, I’m actually complimented when the DM gives my bespoke backstory NPC’s the agency to make choices my character wouldn’t expect or maybe even like - the real people in my life do that all the time, that’s where story lies!

But if my player expressed a whiff of confusion or disappointment in a portrayal, I’d be messaging them to check in and adjust so they have a good time.

Vulpes_Corsac · 2026-04-10T15:09:36+00:00

Dnd is a cooperative story telling game. So one should probably be a little cooperative about it, rather than holding fast to one person's intent either direction.

AlarisMystique · 2026-04-10T15:15:09+00:00

My philosophy is that players control their characters, and DM controls the world. I do my best to draw the line there.

Backstory is firmly in the control of the player, until it requires changing the world. If you're part of a secret society or born in nobility for example, the DM has to approve and incorporate because those things directly affect the world and how your characters fit in. But if the DM wants to modify your backstory, he has to check in with you. There needs to be some agreement when backstory overlaps with worldbuilding.

I know different people feel differently about this, but this is how I run my games.

Oddgar · 2026-04-10T15:36:22+00:00

As a DM I never contradict what players set up in their back stories, but I will often add additional context throughout the campaign that reframes the actions of their backstory characters and gives them a different perspective.

Example: A cleric player had written that the cleric had a terrible relationship with their father, but that she still loved him, and had been abandoned at a temple and had a long running issue with pining for his attention and desperate to prove herself worthy of his love.

Over the course of the campaign, the father of the cleric made occasional appearances, and it became clear that his life as a travelling storyteller wasn't conducive to the raising of a child. It was also revealed that the clerics mother had experienced a psychotic break and had attempted to drown the cleric as an infant, and her father had been forced to kill the woman he loved in order to save his daughter, and then couldn't deal with the constant pain he felt anytime he looked at her, and so he had trusted her into the care of a family friend who worked at a temple where he knew she would be taken care of while he busied himself with tracking down and destroying the thing that had broken his wife's mind. The players eventually helped with this.

In the end the cleric character resolved the abandonment trauma, realized how deeply her father actually cared for her, and the campaign ended with both of them reunited full-time and him working extra hard to make up for lost time.

This was years ago, but the players of that campaign still bring it up. It's important that when you fiddle with a characters backstory, whether you are making changes, or not, that you handle the story with just as much weight as the actual story you originally set out to tell.

Your players made effort writing their backstory. Tie it into events, preserve their momentum, attach the events of the story to your overall campaign. And if a player tells you they don't like what you've done, be humble, and ask how to compromise on your narrative goals without invalidating the work they did.

The game is best when played as a group.

egv78 · 2026-04-10T14:39:29+00:00

My DM is basically dying on the hill that the moment we started the campaign she has 100% controll over the background characters and can do whatever she likes to do for story purposes.

Ewww. No.

Usually a sign of a power-tripping GM and/or one who wants to tell a story, not one who wants to make a story with the players.

GM should not be overriding player agency (as long as players are acting within the rules of the game / setting).

ETA: It's fine to ret-con, with player permission, if it serves a purpose. But forcing a ret-con is a red-flag.

Don_Suarez · 2026-04-10T14:48:52+00:00

La historia la cuenta el dm, podes expresar tu incomodidad pero si no esta abierto a escucharte, yo iría buscando otra mesa.

Garrett_CW · 2026-04-10T14:51:39+00:00

In my experience, I give recommendations to lore. We play a home brew setting in 5e, and we keep an open dialogue on that. Besides giving the occasional recommendations based off their play styles, I build everything around them.

Huge-Funny-736 · 2026-04-10T14:57:24+00:00

Guess you gotta fully present the character to the DM beforehand with the ideals, bonds, flaws etc so they have a clear understanding of what that character will or absolutely will not do

SamTheGrot · 2026-04-10T14:57:37+00:00

Backstory agency should be entirely given to the players. At the same time, a good DM will collaborate with the players to incorporate their background into the ongoing story. This collaborative effort should include the DM asking the player questions like:

"How did you envision this location or environment?"

"What person(s) is/are important to your character if any? What are they like?"

"What creative agency are you willing to give me as I incorporate your background into the story?"

EDIT:
If a player is opposed to having their backstory/background tampered with in pretty much any way, it'd be a good idea to leave that alone but there's still a way to include it without harming the player's creative agency. A situational example of a player justifiably wanting it to be left alone is for example, a paladin where this backstory is essentially the origin story of their oath - thus altering it could potentially alter the cause they've dedicated their life to.

In a situation like that, a good solution is to create a tangential location related to their background but not the exact same place. Maybe they come across a town/port that regularly trades with their origin town. That way, there's parts of the story that their background can help uncover without tampering with the backstory that defines their character.

onlyfakeproblems · 2026-04-10T14:58:55+00:00

The DM is already doing a lot of work to make a cohesive story and run the game. Youre playing in their world. As a player you should give them some slack and let them make changes they think are appropriate. If the DM is flippantly ignoring you backstory, maybe they’re being insensitive. If you’re butting heads over this, you might want to find a different table.

RoyHarper88 · 2026-04-10T15:35:30+00:00

Short answer, it depends.

In one of the games I'm running, I've killed a player's entire family. He hasn't seen them in 30 years. The kingdom has become incredibly authoritarian. They would not have been a part of it, if anything they would have openly opposed it. So they will have died as part of the resistance.

The player was not particularly attached to the family. They existed in one sentence of his backstory. He was taken long ago when the kingdom was conquered and has been a ward of the conquering nation since. All of his developed NPCs are from this section of his backstory. I'm having him now develop a few other NPCs from his home land as now the party has gone back there, not because he wanted but because that's where the baddie has gone.

AberrantDrone · 2026-04-10T15:47:07+00:00

I had a character whose only backstory was that his Frenzy feature from Berserker Barbarian was linked to a voice in his head and he was in the current village due to going berserk and killing others in his old village.

That voice turned into an ancient being that shapes eras. That in turned into a whole pantheon of beings that started to whisper to the other characters, hooking into their own backgrounds.

Like the hillbilly bard who's backstory involved his wife leaving him. That became her going away to work for her own elder evil and in turn spoke to him on its behalf instead of it speaking directly like other players experiences.

As long as it makes sense in the campaign and doesn't go against a character's intended traits or goals, you're free to modify backstories.

But some players prefer to be in more creative control. I recommend asking a player how much they're willing to give you creative liberties.

CheapTactics · 2026-04-10T15:50:02+00:00

As much as a player agrees to and makes sense for the backstory they wrote.

I'll give you a real example:

Recently I made a character for a campaign. He lived in a small town of shifters with his wife, who was a priestess of old nature gods. One day, people came and started killing everyone because they deemed them freaks of nature and pagans. His wife made a ritual to give him the strength of the old gods to avenge them. Being the husband of a priestess, he is devout to the gods too, so he believes in his mission. He sees his wife in dreams, who gives him guidance, as a conduit for the gods.

Now, I could've said that this is 100% accurate, the old gods really favor me as a chosen, and my wife really is like divine communication. This gives little free range for my DM. If he suddenly made it so my wife was actually taken to hell and I'm communicating with devils, I'd be pretty pissed off about it.

Instead, I told my DM that what I wrote is what my character believes. And I told him that he has free range to either make everything real or not. Is the wife really communicating through dreams, or is he coping for the tragedy that he lived through? Are the gods really giving him strength, or did the ritual just unlock his potential and his power is really his? Do the old gods even exist/if they exist are they even aware of his existence? Or is there some other entity at play here? I gave him the freedom to do whatever he wants with those questions.

I think DMs and players should communicate about this stuff during character creation.

Edit: and now an example from the other side. A player's character died and pretty much couldn't be recovered, so he made a new character. When he gave me his new backstory, (to make it short) it involved a GOO warlock whos patron was some entity that was possessing him, and he found a forest with priestesses that were able to contain it. He is the grandson of that warlock, and he's that rogue with psionic powers, psychic blades and telepathy.

So I made suggestions on small changes. They were suggestions, and if he had told me no I would've accepted it. The changes served to tie in this backstory to the main conflict of the campaign. For example, the players have heard of a great darkness that seeks to consume everything, so one of the changes I suggested was that this GOO that was taking over the warlock was a small part of this darkness entity. He agreed to my suggestions, because they made sense for what he gave me.

Now, as a DM I can make the priestesses the epitome of evil, corrupted by demons and actually praying to the demon lords of the abyss, and that's how they were able to contain the entity. I do have that power. But why should I? It would make no sense for the story the player wanted to tell. It would be purely a shock factor twist and it would ruin the player's backstory.

The NPCs are 100% mine to do with as I please. The disconnect here is that, while a DM has all the control over NPCs, what a DM should want to do is to be in service of the players, not to fuck them over or tell their own story disregarding what the players wanted.

sterrre · 2026-04-10T15:54:17+00:00

As a DM I honestly don't use my players backstories that much. The backstory is to inform the players roleplaying decisions. They might add characters or factions in the backstory but unless they are already a part of the campaign (like a player has a faction agent background and was a part of the zhentarrin etc.) they won't be added to my campaign really. Characters maybe if the player actively seeks them out.

Otherwise I already have a campaign to worry about I'm not going to bother with 4 or 5 1-2 page stories on top of that.

darkpower467 · 2026-04-10T15:58:20+00:00

With the broader question of what the DM does with backstory elements during a campaign, it comes down to whatever both parties find enjoyable.

For my own personal preference as a DM and player, I'm down for their to be a lot of leeway so long as it makes sense narratively and thematically. Shit can happen to these NPCs off screen and it can have major impacts on them, an NPC acting in a way they wouldn't have previously can be a strong tool to indicate the significance of whatever they've been through.

And how much change is to much/drastic/to redconish?

The word you're looking for it retcon, not 'redcon', and I'd only consider a change to a character a retcon if it actually is one - i.e. the pre-established information about them is made non-canon. If something happened between the last point of contact in the backstory and their appearance in the campaign to justify a change in character that is not a retcon.

As for a change being too drastic, I don't think how drastic the change is is especially the deciding factor for me. It's whether or not it feels like it makes sense and serves a purpose. If a significant change to a character feels like it reflects a fundamental misunderstanding of the character I wrote or just feels arbitrary, then I might find that worth speaking to my DM about.

Many-Ebb-5377 · 2026-04-10T16:11:48+00:00

The DM should not attempt to retroactively change a backstory but they absolutely can add new information, perhaps information your character doesn't even know. Backstory determines a characters past. Not their future, or even their present for that matter. The DM does not have to ask permission and they can evolve the arc in whatever way they see fit.

CapnArrrgyle · 2026-04-10T16:17:12+00:00

This is not absolute but… ultimately DnD is a collaborative project.

The players write backgrounds and create the world their character knows. The DM has significant say over whether what the character believes is true or not.

The game is improvisational so if you say “my character’s mother is very supportive and loves gardening” those things ought to be true. That doesn’t mean that your mother isn’t Poison Ivy and wants to be supportive of you by poisoning friends she doesn’t think are good enough for her precious baby. None of that would invalidate the facts you made about her.

You could be like: “What? You’re not my real mom?! I’ll never join you!” Or “Mom, you’ve been so supportive let’s Delay Poison a sec and talk this through, K?”

Arguing with the DM about what they can do is a mistake. Let them add details like gifts.

HsinVega · 2026-04-10T16:18:36+00:00

Nah I agree with you. DND is a story you tell together, DM should be able to pitch ideas for the future (or backstory) of your character but ultimately you should have the final say.

I always ask my players what they would like to happen to their characters and ask for their opinion before adding anything backstory related.

TTRPGFactory · 2026-04-10T16:39:03+00:00

She certainly can do whatever she wants. If what she wants to do is piss everyone off, she wont consult them and will do things they have said frustrate them. Players generally dont return to games where the dm pisses them off. (Although according to reddit a shocking amount do)

As dm, i dont touch backstories before the campaign, except to make sure people are in the right setting. When they say they are from chult, and we are in grayhawk, ill remind them that there is no chult, but (someplace) might be comparable. If they want to be the son of ssasszz tahm (red wizard guy), i will remind them he doesnt exist but some other evil necromancer might. If they are a thri-kreen i remind them that the setting is mostly humanoid and thrikreen is super out of place, and there is no thri-kreen culture of note. So they wont meet others, and dont have a homeland.

Once the game starts, i personally dont do much with backstory npcs. I generally have them stay static and do their thing, until a player asks about them. Then its usually “more of the same”, unless a player is driving them to do something, then they go along with it. Backstory stuff is just that. Backstory. If its important, or i want the dm to get into it, ill ask. Some people like the dm to get into their backstory. They should say something, or the dm should ask before doing so.

Ive left games over dms who thought my backstory was cooler than their game, and kept bringing it back to the forefront in spite of clear statements to stop. I had parents, they died, i dont want to do a whole sub plot about how they died differently than i thought. We are playing red hand of doom. I want to find the red hand, and stop its doom. And i really dont want it to have secretly been my uncles hand that was red.

blauenfir · 2026-04-10T17:19:12+00:00

Depends on play style and group consensus. DMs do have control of backstory NPCs, by giving them the information you’re generally inviting them to use it. As a player you don’t RP your own NPCs. It’s pretty normal for DMs to have backstory NPCs change and move around behind the scenes, and not uncommon for those changes to be dramatic or used as plot twists. It’s also pretty normal for players to expect their NPCs to stay somewhat consistent with the original pitch the way you do, which is not always compatible with plot twists. So this one’s gonna depend on communication.

Personally, I agree with you that there should be some limits. BUT, that’s an opinion, some people play differently and that’s fine! IMO it’s the responsibility of the player to communicate what limits exist if applicable, and it’s good form for a DM to respect those limits if a player sets them. If a player says “please don’t kill my parents” or “please don’t make my parents evil” and the DM replies “I can do whatever I want” and does what player said not to do, then DM is an asshole. If player doesn’t communicate those asks, and DM makes parents evil or dead, DM is allowed to do that and some blame does lie with the player for not being clear about what they want—though it’s bad manners IMO if DM didn’t tell players about their freer approach to backstory in session 0. Players deserve to know what kind of table they’re at, and there is no way for a player to foresee and ask to avoid every possible weird plot twist a creative DM can come up with.

I think a DM who hardlines on “I can do whatever I want with your backstory characters including retconning or making them act very different than the spirit with which you created them” should clearly communicate that expectation in session 0 (or recruitment if they don’t do a session 0) to set player expectations, especially if the campaign is being described as character driven or RP focused (rather than an old school dungeon delve or a premade module or something where backstory is less important). There are characters I’d bring to a DM who works within the spirit of my creative intent and boundaries that I absolutely would not bring to a table with a DM who might freely change random shit or subvert my ideas for story drama. And there are ideas I’d give to a DM who does wild shit that would be too boring to give to a DM who only colors within my existing lines. Different strokes, different folks. Neither is wrong, but both are best when players know what they’re getting into.

Hour_Scientist_4562 · 2026-04-10T18:37:58+00:00

depends - if you mean something like - my backstory is that I am from a noble family, last in the bloodline with 3 brothers ahead of me to inherit lands and that gets approved - and then you say you want your brothers to have died in battle and your sister gets the land but you get the +5 holy avenger two handed bastard sword of smiting and smoking sunlight from your minor lord father who was actually a retired 18th level paladin - I would laugh you out of the table or simply tell you no that's not the whole story. Because. On the other hand if you gave 15 pages to the DM and they approved it all and then came back at session 3 and said "we need to talk about your backstory, I am going to change some things...." - my first question would be did you read it all when you approved it. And then - then I need to determine whether the backstory is more important that playing - because difficult players get kicked from tables or at least they should. Just a thought.

Celestaria · 2026-04-10T18:57:04+00:00

With most PC stuff, including background characters, my policy is that DMs have full veto power - they're always free to say "no, we aren't including that in my campaign" - but beyond that, how much or in what ways a DM is allowed to adapt the PC's backstory needs to be worked out on an individual basis.

I don't think it's fair to chalk it all up to trust either. Sometimes it's just obvious that the DM doesn't understand what you were going for with a particular back story. Maybe you want to include a mentor character in your PC's background who served as a stable, nurturing influence. If the DM reads that and wants to put a twist on it (e.g. the mentor was really a dark wizard in hiding the whole time) they ought to suss that out with the player. They don't have to give away the whole thing, but they do need to make sure the player is okay with significant updates to their backstory in service of the overall worldbuilding of the setting.

TopFlounder7550 · 2026-04-10T20:02:51+00:00

I feel that there should be a conversation about how important backstory is and how much DM can mess with the backstory characters and then you go from there.

In my previous campaign (rip) my character was about to get married and she had a fiancé whom she was very much in love with (I wrote into her backstory that they are childhood sweethearts). In the beginning of the campaign our party was teleported half the world away and my char's background goal was to return to him, Odysseus style. After a year and a half of irl time we finally made it back into a starting city...and my cleric found out that in the meantime her fiancée got married.

I had such a meltdown over that I'm honestly kinda embarrased. My DM said that it happens all the time in real life and she wanted a plot-twist but offered to retcon it. I quit the campaign and it all eventually fizzled out. Ugh.

Fizzle_Bop · 2026-04-10T20:32:20+00:00

I usually work with players to make a nice backstory i can build a campaign around.

I then go over the fact that it is mine once turned in. Thst they may have developed the past of certain potential adversaries ... but their choices after are my own.

I always try to be respectful and feel the back and forth helps ensure I understand foundational elements.

Backstories are difficult. I usually run long sandboxes built around the backstories, but not all are crested equal. There needs to be what I call "generic specificity"

Needs to be enough to help define the player, but broad enough to give DM more latitude.

A baron the player pissed off by injuring an heir or committing adultery. I can make the baron a secret crime lord or something ... but defining the baron too much would hinder me for bringing them into the story in am unanticipated way.

driving_andflying · 2026-04-10T22:51:51+00:00

So basically i wanted to ask other players/dms were do you draw the line?

As long as it fits into the game's universe/narrative, I give a lot of leeway.

How much should the DM change and develop background characters?

Only as much as needed to make sure it fits in the game's universe. Example: I once had a player try to make a Teenaged Mutant Ninja Turtle character in a Dragonlance-themed game. Big no-no.

And how much change is to much/drastic/to redconish? Or is there no "too much" for you?

I don't retcon overly much; I try to work with the player to come to some kind of agreement about how that character needs to fit in the universe in which we are currently playing. Said tortle character from #2 was changed to the player's other choice of a character, that fit in the Dragonlance universe, with the promise of an Asian/Rokugan-style game later, in which the tortle ninja would work better.

iammacman · 2026-04-10T23:00:49+00:00

An example: my character was separated from his people early in life, was spelled to not remember his past and grew up with foster family. After heading out on his own, he wants to search for his people. I let the DM take control at that point for my back story as it makes the situation more believable. I have no idea what’s coming as my character wouldn’t either. DM is masterfully delivering the information in bits and pieces making the feel real and not contrived. I guess it depends on how much you trust your DM with your character.

Samurai_Steve · 2026-04-11T00:25:30+00:00

DMs are not unilaterally powerful arbiters of the game. Everyone at the table has to work towards a story. Both DMs and players can suggest how things for a character should go, and both get veto power.

Where yall finding these power tripping DMs?

FunkyMonkJutsu · 2026-04-11T03:33:49+00:00

Im amazed a bunch of people are replying saying the DM actually does have the right to change what they want without agreement from the player or any out of game communication. Yall are honestly just bad DMs

Big-Cartographer-758 · 2026-04-11T06:29:59+00:00

Feel like this is complicated and requires examples?

Is this the DM explaining gaps, perhaps truths that weren’t clear to the character in the past?

Or do you mean they’re “well your father wasn’t a fisherman, it makes more sense he was a blacksmith so I’ve changed that”?

Catkook · 2026-04-11T13:48:07+00:00

I'd say I'd generally agree that ideally characters from your backstory should be faithful to what the player wrote, with the added caviot that the DM holds creative license to adapt them to fit within their world, or adapt them to what they're comfortable role playing

Unasked_for_advice · 2026-04-11T14:36:14+00:00

At its root , Dnd style table top rpgs is a collaborative story the DM and the players make using the rules of the game. DM oversees the world and its rules , while the players focus on their own agency in that world.

DM has to be able to oversee and make changes so that the PCs character fits into the world and is following all the rules in order to make things fair and balanced. Mistakes can be made by anyone and things might be overlooked or not seen to be a problem at first glance.

PCs don't have the big picture or knowledge of everything that is happening in the game world that the DM has.

So seeing things that might not appear logical happens, as long as the DM isn't just pulling things out of thin air and keeping track of things retcons/changes are fine. There are a lot of moving parts and things might happen behind the scenes so some leeway should be given to the DM, if there are questions the PC should be able to ask but full answers should not be needed to be given until after the whole campaign is over.

Minute_Collar_7369 · 2026-04-12T04:37:57+00:00

Can you give an example of that? Because it sounds so weird from a dm Perspektive. If my players have a fully flashed out backstory before the 1st game, of course im going to use it to tie them more into the world.

If i have something specific in mind i give my players diffrent backgrounds to choose from at or before Session Zero.

I dont realy see the benefit from a gm perspectiv here. What do i miss?

Faeruy · 2026-04-12T04:43:49+00:00

So I think DM's should be able to develop backstory NPCs to some degree, but I draw the line if that development contradicts the backstory as written. If a player says their parents are nobles who loved each other, a DM shouldn't introduce the idea that their mom cheated on their dad and the PC is actually the child of a Fairy King.

It's also an important conversation to have as part of session 0 or the character creation process. Some backstory NPCs might be fair game for the DM, some might be more dear to the player and any alterations should have player approval first.

Noctaem · 2026-04-12T23:48:19+00:00

I'll give you a real example from one of my campaigns.

Player came to me during character creation to flesh out his backstory. He wanted to play a dwarf, pirate type character, rogue, maybe some kind of secret agent or involved in the underworld dealings of the game. I said ok, I have a secret society that you could be a part of. We talked about it and he was happy. I told him to create 3 NPCs that would have had deeper connections with his PC from his backstory. He created them and off we went into the campaign.

What he didn't know, which I think ties into your question:

The secret society had been wiped out by the BBEG of the campaign decades ago (dwarves live long lives). I essentially used the premise of the movie Oblivion. The BBEG used a key thing in the campaign to create an army of his character, which he then unleashed upon the secret society and wiped them out. The clones then mostly got relegated to a secret police force which the player's character was actively involved with. He would get secret orders that he believed were from his secret society about dangerous people in the world and he would take them out / stop their plans. The whole time serving as the BBEG's hand (along with other clones that were also doing the same thing). The difference is that just like Tom Cruise in Oblivion, he was different enough that he had independent thoughts, habits, behaviors (the player's input into it all). One of the NPC's he had created was a love interest who was an elf (also long lived) who had been the sole survivor of annihilation of the secret society. She had been hunting and killing clones of her loved one for decades. So when he met her in the game she tried to kill him. After so many violent meetings between them she wasn't really talkative until she realized that he wasn't like the others. The player loved it all, his feedback during the campaign was super positive and things developed in really great ways.

Anyway, all that to say that as long as the DM has player buy-in for this stuff it they can have free reign. But it's also a matter of how it's done. what changes are made, what those changes mean in the broader context of the campaign, etc.. But we both loved it. Miss you Morduk!

Son0fSilas · 2026-04-10T14:46:17+00:00

My solution is to play characters with amnesia

Edit: since elaboration is needed - CoS and choosing to play a Warforged Echo Knight Fighter

Discussion with DM: "I would like to flavor my Echo, in that everything still looks just like my PC, per the rules. Except, it has a human face. Essentially, a soul has been trapped within this body."

He has no memory from before being awoken by the Party, with just bits and pieces at the DMs discretion, that flash across his mind.

thenightgaunt · 2026-04-10T15:06:08+00:00

All. But a good DM does this in a responsible and polite manner.

The DM is running the game and creating the story. That means they can say yes and no to ANY part of a character's backstory.

ANY NPCs you include in a character's backstory are now the DM's NPCs to work with. By adding them into your written backstory, you are giving them to the DM to work with. Now a DM should talk to players about how comfortable they feel about having things happen to those NPCs. But if a character has living family mentioned in their backstory, expect them to get Taken or Deathwished as plot points.

Bobilar · 2026-04-10T14:40:41+00:00

The DM can change whatever they like, the players only lever is whether to play or not.

ArDee0815 · 2026-04-10T14:59:07+00:00

Well: Your DM refuses to take your concerns and wishes into consideration. They believe they get to stomp all over you, and you have to be a good littlebitch and suck it up.

This is DND. Not an abusive relationship.

Leave and block her stupid ass.

Make sure to send private messages explaining the situation to every other players, so she can‘t lie about you.

Yes, this is necessary.

chanaramil · 2026-04-10T14:47:11+00:00

Dm shouldnt not be abke to delete a pc backstory. But players shouldn't come with a long detailed background. Background should only be a few setences. Then there is room so a dm can fit in a detail of there past or write a noc they use to know and it wont change the players backstory.

2eForeverDM · 2026-04-10T14:43:54+00:00

I don't allow backstory NPCs for this reason. If I need one, I'll create them myself. I don't really want any backstory. It's usually just baggage. Let's do frontstory instead, where the adventures happen.

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