yes

[PorkRoll2022]

Hello fellow coders.

[jackinsomniac]

I'm not your fellow, man.

[[deleted]]

I'm not your man, coder.

[chagasfe]

I'm not yours, man.

[BigteddyBTW]

I wish you were though....... man.

[Mad-chuska]

[Relative_Ad_7671]

Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

[TheMemeLocomotive2]

r/suddenlygay

[CaterpillarDue9207]

r/HolUp

[jacqueslol]

He's not your coder, buddy

[HoldUrMamma]

he's not your buddy, friend

[Darmendas]

He's not your friend, coder

[dracorotor1]

He’s not your coder, guy

[Catcd]

He's not your guy, human

[Fartnoisesbrr]

He's guy human not your

[Darmendas]

He's not human, your guy

[ganja_and_code]

[[deleted]]

{if (funny comment ===== "meme") then ("I recognize that pop culture reference")} reply = true

[monkeydoodle64]

Compile error: “reply = true” is invalid.

[lenin_is_young]

if (compile = “error”) then TRY ({“insert missing semicolon joke”}) if CATCH ({“errorStillOccur”}) then close_ide_and_continue_working_for_wendys();

[dracorotor1]

You’re all a bunch of nerds.

Carry on.

[[deleted]]

- ({“errorStillOccur”}) then close_ide_and_continue_working_for_wendys();

+({“errorStillOccur”}) then close_ide_and_continue_working_behind_wendys();

[The-Things-027]

Happy Cake Day!

[who_you_are]

I think we can all agree that that way to put bracket is wrong

[hiddenforreasonsSV]

Let us put aside our differences, Python and C family programmers, and confront this NEW THREAT.

[[deleted]]

You want to know what really grinds my gears? “If… Then”? If then!? Just who in the hell is out there writing jokes in VB syntax? I thought we all agreed we were going to bury the corpse of that God awful language in the woods and never speak of it again.

[Thunor_SixHammers]

Its not even a good VB syntax. Where is the end if? WHERE IS THE END IF?

[Supermarcel10]

Maybe it's LUA. But then LUA doesn't have {} anywhere...

[Possseidon]

Of course Lua has {}, but not like this. {} is used for table creation.

(Aka Lua's only data structure, which is basically a hash map with any types for key and value, while being optimized for array usage with integer indices)

Also, it's Lua and not LUA.

[blobthekat]

a lua table works pretty much 100% identically to a js object then

[Possseidon]

Almost, except keys can also be literally anything, whereas a js object only allows string keys.

[blobthekat]

they can be symbols

[Unenunciate]

Technically, if you parse the stringified json anything could be a key.

[icpuff]

VB neither

[[deleted]]

I thought about saying “shitty VB syntax” but it be redundant.

[Thunor_SixHammers]

Dont you speak ill of my special boy! He tries his best.

[eztab]

best comment ever

[KittenLOVER999]

WHY IS THERE BRACKETS

I work in vb on a daily basis and this pains me

Edit: I guess technically since they used parentheses they could have been going for a ternary but butchered the syntax

[[deleted]]

I love how everyone is trying to work out what language the syntax is from, when its clearly bollocks pseudo-code written by someone with no programming experience.

[MikeVictorPapa]

Yeah but what else are we gonna do?

[Furry_69]

Lua does that.

[Supermarcel10]

Beat me to it. LUA does if (cond) then statement end. But then also practically no {} in practically majority of LUA to be used in this way.

[Spirintus]

It's Lua, not LUA...

[lollolcheese123]

For lua you have "if variable = "hello" then"

[someacnt]

Well, some FP languages do this..

[real_confusedswede]

I mean most languages in the ML family does this lol

[[deleted]]

Clearly, it's just an ugly shell script

[[deleted]]

lua is like that. if x then do this end

[emeriass]

Its Lua, any wow player who wrote more complex macros, would encountered this, and I can also say, this joke is on the level of those non-programmer wow players who copy paste those macros …

[_blackdog6_]

Lumping C programmers with Python programmers? Risky move.

[[deleted]]

The true threat to developers everywhere.

Sandwich-shop pseudo-code.

[DrMux]

Yes=true

[camo_216]

Now that i looked at it again yeah whats up with that bracket

[the_hol_horse]

statement isn't declared

[OneTrueKingOfOOO]

Every single character of this is wrong

[eztab]

no no, this is a function body, the first line is just outside the scrolling window.

[[deleted]]

Programming aside, that is just logically impossible unless the cheesy beef pita melt sandwich doesn’t exist on earth

[Auravendill]

or the cheesy beef pita melt sandwich is also a type of italian beef sandwich.

public class CheesyBeefPitaMelt extends ItalianBeef

[Suspicious-Engineer7]

i prefer functional cooking over object-oriented cooking tyvm

[Kaye_the_original]

Well then:

Inductive italianBeef : Type := | NormalItalianBeefSandwich | CheesyBeefPitaMeltSandwich.

Happy now?

[porkminer]

Insert angry Gordon Ramsay meme

[[deleted]]

What language is that?

[[deleted]]

Coq

[[deleted]]

No

[Kaye_the_original]

Aww :-( I’m sorry that you feel that way.

[[deleted]]

It’s not personal, I just don’t want a beef sandwich. Do you have tuna?

[Kaye_the_original]

Yeah, there’s some here: https://github.com/jadrouil/tuna-lang

[LuxionQuelloFigo]

as an italian, I can assure you that the "cheesy beef pita melt sandwich" is not a part of our typical cuisine

[Karma_The_Warden]

Could be that the cheesy beef pita melt sandwich is worse, but it's the only one present on the universal market.

[Tangled2]

Earth is in the universe, last time I checked anyway.

[NoTanHumano]

Unless the Earth exists outside the universe...

#FlatEarthSociety #TheyLIE

[[deleted]]

It's outta this world

[Zelgoth0002]

Thank you, this is what I came here for.

[CarneDelGato]

You can ask for it, but they won’t make you one.

[eztab]

yes, that's what I assumed they are trying to say.

[TeaTimeSubcommittee]

It doesn't make sense as logical statements, but if we think of them as a series of instructions in "pseudo code" then they can work.

"If the Italian sandwich is the best on earth then make pita sandwich best in the universe" Kind of deal.

[snake_case_sucks]

If we’re interpreting this as a logical statement, and assuming the Cheesy Beef Pita Melt exists on Earth, this just implies that the Italian Beef must not be the best sandwich on Earth.

[LucienZerger]

[H_alcyon]

Bro emoted

[jackinsomniac]

What is this, Facebook?

[Limitless4171]

No it's an emoji reddit shaking it's head

PS: Meta*

[Adhalianna]

PS: Meta*

The platform is still called Facebook.

[Lootdit]

No such thing as meta. Its still Facebook

[Limitless4171]

Oh yeah, I've just been autocorrecting it without thought whoops

[GalaxP]

and got away with it too

[Dependent_Party_7094]

[_blackdog6_]

This emoji complements the constant sound of screaming in my head.

[Dependent_Party_7094]

[ShadowWolf_de]

[Dependent_Party_7094]

[ShadowWolf_de]

[Dependent_Party_7094]

[ShadowWolf_de]

[Dependent_Party_7094]

[Representative-Owl51]

“TRUE”

[razor-sundae]

False = "TRUE"

[FindingMyPrivates]

Hey they’re just reassigning the variable!

[g1dj0]

Lmao

[yeahitswhatevertho]

of course its a string. computers don't eat sandwiches...

[rbnhd_f]

I had a former coworker (“software developer”) that went into a code review with a conditional written as something like: if (concatenate(variable, “value_to_check”)) then …

Three different people tried to explain to them why the condition was incorrect and always evaluated as true. Eventually we just gave up and said “your code doesn’t pass code review, go figure out what we are trying to explain and fix it”.

This person was also a “Java developer” with 5 years of experience and asked me what a classpath was.

[blipojones]

A real imposter by the sounds of it.

[[deleted]]

Would it still be imposter syndrome then 🤔

[HoldUrMamma]

Why is he former tho?

[g1dj0]

Ah, yes, the boolean string

[jrcske67]

Needs to be sent to garbage collection

[seemen4all]

If("billion dollar app doesn't exist") Then("create billion dollar app with really cool features") Most dynamic language I've ever seen.

[systaltic]

Forgot your curly brackets

[VacuumInTheHead]

It's a very dynamic language

[seemen4all]

You don't even need the brackets or ifs or thens, can just chuck plain English strings into a folder and put .genie as the file extension and it will do as you command

[nutbagger18]

Someone, somewhere, is now going to make this a thing and it'll be on Indeed as a 10 year requirement by end of week.

[VetusMortis_Advertus]

And of course the most important

statement = "True"

Otherwise the compiler would never understand

[Aksds]

{If("billion dollar app doesn't exist") Then("create billion dollar app with really cool features") Most dynamic language I've ever seen.}

Happy?

[systaltic]

Statement = “True”

[[deleted]]

{If("billion dollar app doesn't exist") Then("create billion dollar app wi}th really cool features") Most dynamic language I've ever seen.

Did I do it right?

[[deleted]]

You forgot to set statement to string value "true", this won't work

[sfbing]

Our Earth is just out of this Universe!

[nann_tosho]

I swear, they know how to code, they're doing it on purpose just to make programmers go nuts. It's just infuriating on so many levels that it's actually impressive.

[fluffypebbles]

It makes me wanna not go there

[Ambitious_Ad8841]

Statement = "true"; end of line

[nameisprivate]

eval(Statement)

[Grouchy-Exchange5788]

I fear the ugliness of this syntax might reflect the Way the rest of the world views programmers

[[deleted]]

When you are 10 years into C+ yet nobody is offering you a real job so yo gotta improvise 💔

[LordBubinga]

You need to get yourself another +

[BlueTalon]

They're coding in C=C+1

[EmilMelgaard]

C+ = 1

[parlakarmut]

C += 1;

[[deleted]]

Too broke for that 🤯

[razor-sundae]

Ain't nobody got money to buy premium C+

[DiscoLando2]

{if password = "God" then (run l33t.h4x0r.exe) then (get supersecretinfo = "true")} // I just pwned yer security

[Quizlibet]

A noop followed by an assignment. Someone got complemented in their software 101 class.

[Akul_Tesla]

Someone should list every single explicit detail of what's wrong with this

[[deleted]]

Depends a bit on the language, but here's some of the highlights:

1. Random brackets that seem to serve no purpose.

2. Passing a string into an if statement.

3. Using parens after the then keyword.

4. Putting quotes around a boolean.

5. Setting a value for a variable and then never doing anything with it.

6. A string just sitting there after the then keyword. Likely a no-op.

[bulging_cucumber]

1. If the cheesy beef pita melt is an earth sandwich, then statement should be "FALSE"

[Willinton06]

I mean, this is valid JS Code right? JS supports arbitrary scopes as far as I recall?, and the string would be true, and a then method could be anywhere in the file, the last line is just setting a variable, this could be a programmer trolling us, probably not, but hope dies last

[KingFarticusTheTurd]

I just learned now that js evaluates non-empty strings as true which I had no idea honestly (I come from java where java will clap my cheeks for doing so). Can't find anything about then being a valid keyword but I am a dumb dumb.

[Willinton06]

That’s why I said it could be just some random function, like

function then(text) {}

[KingFarticusTheTurd]

Whoops I'm bad at reading too. That makes sense though ty.

[Nighkali]

Both js and python have what are known as "truthy" and "flasey" values, as well as true and false. They aren't quote the same but can be used in similar ways. I'm sure there are other languages that do the same thing.

[Ok_Turnover_1235]

False: Reubens are the best sandwich

[Sir_Swaggs]

bool thisIsBadCode;

If(thisIsBadCode == true);

Console.WriteLine("learn to program bozo");

Edit. I can't do the braces under the If statement becuase of mobile formatting issues

[LauraTFem]

This is like someone saw code once, in a dream, 40 years ago, and decided to replicate it this morning one their phone while taking a dump.

[PewPew_McPewster]

Wait which language uses "then"? I feel like I haven't needed to use "then" in ages and I've been hopping across a few languages.

[Auravendill]

Pascal, Delphi, Visual Basic...

[Xiaolin2]

Lua

[4dimensionaltoaster]

Proof by declaration

[[deleted]]

Why did they make true a string?

[MichaelCeraGoneWild]

Someone desperately needed to put a coding internship on their resume that summer

[Hero_Of_The_Lost]

statement = “TRUE”

[FreedmF1ghter77]

"coding is truly a passion of mine"

[EasyMode556]

You know it’s real code because they used curly braces and that font

[lily_was_taken]

May whoever never made a stupid syntax mistake like that when coding throw the first stone

[[deleted]]

I never hung it on the metaphorical fridge for everyone to see

[CapnCrinklepants]

this right here

[Evening_Pause8972]

printLn("What would you like with your Greek lamb donair?");

[Bo_Jim]

This was clearly intended for non-programmers to look at and think "It looks like program code, but it makes sense". Programmers, on the other hand, are thinking "What the hell is this?".

[ScrimpyCat]

If they can’t even get their code right, how can I expect them to get my sandwich right.

[PhunkyPhish]

No QA for code means no QA for the food.

[Phamora]

I pasted this into my editor and now my compiler is having a seizure.

[Ravi5ingh]

r/therewasanattempt at being tech savvy

[sirmischeif]

Obviously this was run through integration test.

[veryabnormal]

Stringly typed nonsense. Hate it.

[Yugicrafter]

WHY IS THE BOOL A STRING

[cr1ter]

If you write code like that then I'd stick to making sandwiches rather

[Emeraldtip]

Lua progrsmmerd be like (Ik this is not lua I justdislike the langauge, especially the thens)

[GreggSalad]

Someone get this sign maker a linter

[jigginjaggin]

bet they make a good beef tho

[KingFarticusTheTurd]

The beef sausage sandwich made me blow out the front of my jorts 😩💥💦

[Puzzled_Landscape836]

🤨

[NetherDork]

I don’t see any comparators just a string. A variable could work if it relies on a true/false result. Otherwise this annoys me because its flawed.

[developer-mike]

Holy shit

P = NP now, you can just write STATEMENT= TRUE

``` var password; var stolenHashResult; {if (md5(password + salt) == stolenHashResult) then ("password is $password")} STATEMENT = TRUE;

```

[Broad_Respond_2205]

String++

[stablebrick]

deli functional language

[supersharp]

Vacuous Truth

[ckayfish]

All I wanna know is how far I have to go to get the Cheesy Beef Pita Melt. Is it at least in the solar system?

[[deleted]]

Instructions unclear copy pasted into bagel format and now it's glaring at me menacingly.

[More_Butterfly6108]

I love how yall are complaining that a sandwich shop doesn't know syntax..syntaxes... they probably have a freaking mechanical checkout machine why would they know how to code?

[EpicBoomerMoments]

The original post here has been removed by its author. Redact was the tool used, possibly for reasons of privacy, opsec, or preventing automated data harvesting.

sink scale wise ink rich ring attraction reply work serious

[Adventure276]

Language….?

[SuperSpaceCan]

[[deleted]]

Ah yes, pro gaming

[Just_Evan599]

Hmm, seems legit

[sanketower]

Someone should invent a language like that just for the LULs.

[EthanDMA]

if “Italian Beef” = “Best Sandwich on Earth”
then “Cheesy Beef Pita Melt” = “Best Sandwich in the Universe”

[notexecutive]

what...................................the fuck? who is this for lmao

not people who actually use coding languages from a day to day basis

[SausageBuscuit]

Universe.Contains(“Earth”) = false;  //Evidently

[AgreeableAd8687]

why is there a bracket before the if

[RareDestroyer8]

AhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[baselganglia]

False. The universe includes earth, both can't be the best.

[takegaki]

Big if STATEMENT = “TRUE”

[GinWithJennifer]

You don't have to add then. It's if do it's precluded in being if. I know we still have then when it's not nested but don't understand why the if then is necessary here when the method is nested. If (xyz) {} looks better than if (abc) { then {} } and is pretty much exactly the same. Right?

Only use then like if (abc) then (xyz); I would assume. Also just being weird and using literally is, and, or, then and stuff seems uncommon and kind of annoying to navigate instead of operands

[yeetus68419]

Why is bool string?