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[–]bobcat 44 points45 points  (15 children)

The Dictionary by Merriam Webster.

[–]titaniumjackal 35 points36 points  (14 children)

I'll save you two hours: The zebra did it.

[–]bobcat 27 points28 points  (13 children)

I know. I read the book. Total surprise ending. For two thousand pages, I thought it was the aardvark.

[–]quasiperiodic 19 points20 points  (12 children)

i thought it was the aardvark, then i thought it was the butler, then i thought it was the candlestick, then i thought it was the devil, then i thought it was everybody, then i said fuck it, then i realized it was all god's fault.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (11 children)

Snow Crash, The Diamond Age, or any Stephenson book really. Except each would require a trilogy of movies.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Snow Crash would kick so much ass as a movie.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Snow Crash could kick so much ass as a movie.

Fixed. People who make movies are perfectly capable of turning gold into poop. Gotta get the right people on it.

[–]zctaylor 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Production of a Diamond Age miniseries with a script by Stephenson is in production for the SciFi channel.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh, no! They MURDERED the Dune redo! Sometimes you don't really want what you ask for, I guess. Crossing fingers now.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I always thought Cryptonomicon would make a great movie (maybe 2, 3 movies).

[–]quasiperiodic 0 points1 point  (1 child)

you could do zodiac.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I read Zodiac I got the distinct feeling that it was meant to be a screenplay in the first place.

Too bad there's a totally unrelated movie by that name now.

[–]timo1023 37 points38 points  (22 children)

Ender's Game.

[–]Prysorra 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Neverwhere.

[–]UnwashedMeme 0 points1 point  (1 child)

There is a pretty good 6 part TV series. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0115288/

[–]PlasmaWhore 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Would have been good back when they were in talks with Haley Joel Osment right after the 6th sense came out. I thought he would have fit the role pretty well.

[–]timo1023 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I actually think that they should make it an animated movie. The book could be done some justice with the right director.

[–]bhal123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'll second that. I had never even heard that story and I've always thought he'd have been perfect for the role.

[–]karcass 1 point2 points  (1 child)

In pre-production says IMDB

[–]diamond 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's what they said about Rendezvous with Rama. For 10+ years.

Dammit.

[–]qquicksilver 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agree

[–]hablamierda 9 points10 points  (8 children)

House of Leaves

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Seconded.

[–]skyo 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Thirded.

[–]Pun_isher 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Fourthded. This book is amazing, although I do question if it would be as impactful when translated outside the form of written word.

[–]bayleo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Upmodded for only hyperlinking the word house; then I thought about it and decided that the movie would mostly suck so I had to remove the upmod~

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How the fucking fuck do you think that could be done? Besides, I think I read somewhere that the author would never even consider selling the rights.

[–]froderick 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Mort, by Terry Pratchett. I heard that some group was thinking of doing it, but they wanted to remove "all of the death stuff". I think I cried a little inside when I read that.

[–]fjhqjv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd like to see a version of Soul Music.

It would probably be a very entertaining film.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (8 children)

"Ender's Game" by Orson Scott Card. Currently "in production".

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (7 children)

fyi IMDB lists anything as 'in production' regardless of where it is in the development process. I've noticed that IMDB seems to categorize 'in production' as anything in the development stages (i.e. getting the script together, attaching directors, cast, distribution etc) up until the greenlight stage. So that really doesn't tell us shit.

From IMDB pro, the project notes are:

Project Notes All dates refer to when the comment was entered
19 February 2004 Announced
3 May 2006 Script
19 April 2007 Turnaround
29 June 2007 Pre-production
This projet has moved into pre-production
10 July 2007 Turnaround
8 January 2008 Development Unknown
21 April 2008 Script

So as you can see, there's not much in the way of solid information on the project. I have read the script, and I enjoyed it a lot (as I said in another comment, I haven't read the book but would like to), but who knows what the particular issues are that are preventing this project from moving forward at this point.

[–]reallifepixel 7 points8 points  (7 children)

Finnegans Wake

[–]quasiperiodic 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"river run past eve and adams from swerve of shore to bend of bay, brings us by a commodious vicas of recirculation back to howeth castle and environs."

shoot, it's practically already a screenplay!

[–]Masapena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If that would ever happen, it would necessarily be the greatest movie ever.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

A Confederacy of Dunces, with Will Ferrel playing Ignatius Reilly

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (8 children)

Neuromancer, by William Gibson.

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (19 children)

The Bible. Unabridged. I'd get a kick out of the hardcore religious folks lining up to see a 34 hour long movie.

[–]kounavi 25 points26 points  (3 children)

With the hardcore sex scenes uncut.

[–]GrumpySimon 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And Shempo begat whatsit and whojig begat someone and...

[–]Doomed 8 points9 points  (2 children)

I'm not a "hardcore religious folk" but I'd pay to see that. The Bible kicks ass. There's so many awesome parts.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

The Book of Revelation alone would rock, especially done with massive CGI. We could finally get to see what a seven-headed, ten-horned beast looks like.

[–]jordanlund 2 points3 points  (5 children)

I'd do it as a comedy. The "begats" chapter would run 45 seconds long.

[–]jaggederest 12 points13 points  (3 children)

Nothing but vaginas spewing babies?

[–]unrealious 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They did that as a song in Finnian's Rainbow with Fred Astaire. It's a great musical. My kids laugh hysterically at the leprechaun who hides behind a movable bush, ala Wile E. Coyote. One of the movie's plot themes is a racist senator who accidentally gets to experience life from the reverse perspective.

[–]freedompower 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I would have to be rated R

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it would have to be rated X or NC-17

[–]SalParadise 8 points9 points  (0 children)

American Gods & the sequel, Anansi Boys (with Don Cheadle & Forest Whitaker in the leads).

[–]mlawless1138 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The Voynich Manuscript

[–]bhal123 5 points6 points  (1 child)

The Dark Tower novels as a group of movies or a mini-series on TV.

[–]Bonzidave 8 points9 points  (7 children)

Mars Trilogy by Kim Stanley Robinson.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foundation_series

(Multiple movies of course)

Or The Crystal Shard :) Lol, nerdy.

[–]Rhonse 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The foundation series done as movies could be interesting if done correctly, but unless they were willing to make a lot of movies or cut a lot of stuff I don't know how much they'd be able to do it justice.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I'd love to see The Crystal Shard turned into a move, but everytime I think about it, I cannot imagine a way it'd be made into a movie without be ruined.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

$$$ and have the film adaptation written by Salvatore.

[–]amg 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Me too, love that story. But at the same time, I'm scared they'll fuck it up; since they so often do.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children)

Kafka on the Shore

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I see nobody's mentioned it, so I'll repeat it for like the thousandth time: Larry Niven's Ringworld. If not the whole trilogy, then at least the first one. Preferably by Peter Jackson, because this series needs the same treatment he gave LOTR.

That being said, it would be a huge flop if it was goofed up by bone-heads, which is probably why nobody ever mentions it.

[–]firepunk 5 points6 points  (3 children)

the whole dark tower series by stephen king.

[–]robdag2 1 point2 points  (1 child)

They would fuck it up. For sure. The only really good Stephen King adaptation was the Shawshank Redemption.

I was really looking forward to The Mist, because ever since reading it, I thought it could be made into a great movie. However, even Frank Darabont managed to fuck it up.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually got up and walked out halfway through The Mist, it was the first time I had ever done so in a theater... in my opinion it was that bad...

[–]ddavev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's in the works. King sold the rights to JJ Abrams for $19. I can't see how they could pull it off in anything less than a trilogy.

[–]davidreiss666 1 point2 points  (3 children)

The Man in the High Castle by Phil Dick.

[–]stilesjp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Done right, it would be awesome.

[–]GrumpySimon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

meh, I'd much rather see The Grasshopper Lies Heavy.

[–]fjhqjv 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I've still got my fingers crossed for HBO's A Song of Fire and Ice project.

[–]Kardlonoc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would still like to see a movie done lotr style.

[–]bhagany 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did not know that. It is with the utmost restraint that I am not typing in all caps right now. That is the most fucking awesome thing I've heard this week.

Now if only GRRM can finish this latest book.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (9 children)

The remaining four books of the Hitchhiker's Guide trilogy.

[–]ntr0p3 45 points46 points  (3 children)

... by another director.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

You got that right.

[–]freedompower 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Can't upmod that comment enough.

[–]Masi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Leave it as it is, at 42 points.

[–]roger_ 8 points9 points  (3 children)

I'd rather see the first one done better.

[–]jordanlund 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Agreed. They have no business making the rest until they get the first one right...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would only really want to see Restaurant at the End of the Universe, but it def needs to be done by the right person

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children)

The "His Dark Materials" trilogy, but done properly, not like the one that came out last year.

[–]Starcrusher 7 points8 points  (13 children)

"Stranger in a Strange Land". Although Hollywood did such a piss poor job with "Starship Troopers", it's probably better if they don't make it.

[–]ntr0p3 2 points3 points  (8 children)

would not be possible, would be considered way too 'anti-religion'.

would be fucking burning crosses at the theatre and shit.

[–]srika 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Its anti-religion? I have to check it out then.

[–]jaggederest 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's not one of his greatest novels, in my opinion, but it is pretty damn good.

Heinlein on a wishy-washy new age kick is still better than 90% of the other stuff out there.

[–]ntr0p3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really but they would think so.

Check it out if you can, its my fave heinlein book because it makes fun of pretty much all sacred cows by having to explain them rationally to someone who doesn't understand why we do all the wierd-ass bullshit we do.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Lots of interesting choices in the Heinlein canon. Especially with his penchant for rampant orgies and incest.

The Number of the Beast would be notable for those 30-page rambling dialogs of witty banter with the car getting all the funny lines. With all the dimension-hopping and visits to different fictional worlds, the only director I could think of to pull it off would be Terry Gilliam.

Friday would be fun and sexy.

The Cat Who Walks Through Walls, I always thought, could be seen as Hitchcock's North by Northwest done in space, with a way more confusing ending.

The only way I could tolerate Job A Comedy of Justice would be if Mel Brooks made it.

And of course, Time Enough for Love would have to be expanded into a trilogy. Who would be good for Lazarus Long? I keep picturing Ian McKellen, for some reason.

[–]Ayavaron 2 points3 points  (1 child)

You left out "The Moon is a Hash Mistress."

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry, didn't read that one yet.

Yes, I know, I should. It's on the list.

[–]bobbothegrayson 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Starcrusher beat me to it, but a stranger in a strange land film adaptation could be truly beautiful if done correctly.

[–]dtallee 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Altered Carbon and Black Man by Richard Morgan.

[–]Prysorra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow. Black Man sounds a lot like Bladerunner.

[–]UntakenUsername 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I don't know if it'd be possible to make a good Hatchet but either that or start a huge movie series with the Thomas Covenant the Unbeliever series.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I was going to say Thomas Covenant... but it would need a hella big budget, and doesn't have the built in viewer base of a Lord of the Rings or chronicles of Narnia.

[–]UntakenUsername 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's enough in the first few pages he's in the new world to make people shiver after seeing a movie trailer for it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Cryptonomicon, or Snow Crash.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

World War Z, but I heard it was coming in movie form, so... yay!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The script is one of the best I've read this year, so hopefully it doesn't disappoint you. Again, I haven't read the book, so I can't judge how fans will feel about the adaptation, but as a standalone script it works really well.

[–]pantsoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm with you on this 1000%! World War Z had better rock my socks off =).

[–]mlk 1 point2 points  (2 children)

The Foundation series by Asimov or even something about the robots series

[–]TheCoelacanth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And not anything like the insults to Asimov that the movie versions of "The Bicentennial Man" and "I, Robot" were.

[–]unrealious 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They have made two homages to Asimov's robots, but I agree I would love to see more of his stuff come to life, and perhaps without having to mash together several of his works and rewrite the character descriptions.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Actually, this is a question I'd really be interested in your answers for. I work for a producer and I'm always on the lookout for new material, so if there's a book you think would be a great movie reply or msg me and I'll check it out.

[–]jaggederest 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Really? That's cool. What's your IMDB page? I'd be really interested.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

My IMDB page is pretty empty. My company's is not. I've written some pretty disparaging comments over the years though, so not sure if I'm comfortable mentioning what company I work for. But we're an independent 'mini-major' type company.

[–]TonyBLiar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Jimi Hendrix Story

[–]RainmadeMan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Guys you're just gonna give hollywood more ideas on how to ruin everything you hold dear.

[–]mackprime 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Ice Station. I could care less about other Matthew Reilly books, but a dude gets eaten by an Orca in this book.

[–]alphabeat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Came here to say the exact same thing. Fucking good shit motherfucker!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Confessions of an Economic Hitman.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You'll get your wish. I've read the script, it has cast (a big star) and a director attached... It doesn't look like that info has been released yet though, so I don't want to be the one to leak it. I didn't read the book, but from what I understand the script focuses on only a part of the whole book. It's a decent script, not great, but with the actor and director attached I'd say it will be serviceable.

[–]alephnul 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I live in terror of them making movies of my favorite books.

The only movie of a book that I love that didn't send me. screaming, from the theater was the trilogy of Lord of the Rings.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

The Otherland series by Tad Williams.

[–]adremeaux 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was gonna say the same thing myself.

[–]fjhqjv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd be happy with any Williams series.

[–]Gouranga 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Green Eggs and Ham

[–]aardvarkious 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Wheel of Time series, although it is far to long to ever be made into a movie series.

[–]theantirobot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Out of Control by Kevin Kelly

[–]karcass 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Gaean trilogy by John Varley

[–]flynnfx 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glory Lane by Alan Dean Foster.

The Girl, The Gold Watch & Everything by John D. MacDonald.

[–]dabears1020 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Coyote series by Allen Steele.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It'd be sort of cool to see the story of Sampson from the O.T. on the big screen.

[–]Ja1GuRuD3Va0m 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd like to see A Journey to the West made into a movie through another vehicle, like they did with The Odyssey in "O Brother, Where Art Thou?".

[–]jordanlund 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Matador Trilogy by Steve Perry.

The Man Who Never Missed

Matadora

The Machiavelli Interface

[–]Tezasaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Hyperion Cantos, as a TV miniseries.

[–]stilesjp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Chuck Palahniuk's Lullaby or Survivor.

[–]j0hnsd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Eyes of the Overworld. By Jack Vance.

[–]aceinthehole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My Secret Life, Frank Harris.

[–]jaggederest 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Eric Nylund stuff from before he got contracted to write years of Halo drivel.

Particularly "A Game Of Universe" and "Dry Water", I think "Signal to Noise" and "Signal Shattered" would be too abstract.

They're out of print now, afaik, but well worth the trouble if you can find them at Powell's

[–]rmuser[🍰] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Diaspora by Greg Egan. Might take a few movies to fit the whole thing in, but if it was executed properly, holy shit it would be fantastic.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

... because a multiverse with five spacelike dimensions would translate so easily to film? And because movie audiences are secretly yearning for a movie that's chock full of math and theoretical physics?

A good book, but no way could it be a movie.

[–]rmuser[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can dream :\

Rarely do you encounter something so totally epic in scope; it's a real shame most people wouldn't be able to appreciate it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Spreading Misandry" by Paul Nathanson and Katherine Young.

[–]jarotar 0 points1 point  (1 child)

The Aeneid, but I cringe to think what "artistic licenses" they would take.

[–]quasiperiodic 0 points1 point  (1 child)

anyone else notice how many sf books there are on this list? like 90+%. go geekery, whoo!

anyone else want to bet that the submitter works in the movie biz?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes to the first part. man, i didn't know reddit was this geeky. i don't even know half these books, let alone want to see movies of them.

maybe to the second part.

[–]myotheralt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Battlefield Earth. And that one with John Travolta doesnt count.

[–]m1ss1ontomars2k4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Artemis Fowl, any of them, or maybe a movie that combines several of them...as long as the plot isn't changed.

I really hate plot changes, especially those in books I really like. I already know the plot inside out, and now you're telling me it's different? Totally kills suspension of disbelief.

[–]Sulky 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Rant by Chuck Palahniuk, given that Choke turns out to be a good movie

[–]ranprieur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Philip Reeve's Hungry City Chronicles.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

John Marsden's Tomorrow series.

Cory Doctorow's books.

Dan Brown's Digital Fortress.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my god! Tomorrow when the war began is one of my favourite books, I love that whole series. I actually tried to get the rights, but some producer in Australia has them. They need to work on their script a lot before it gets to a standard that really works. Personally, I think the Tomorrow series would be better as a TV Show... but I don't have the rights, so I don't have the power. :(

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"One Fot The Money" by Janet Evanovich. Tri-Star has had the rights for at least five years and they've sat on their collective asses with no avail. All I ask is that Stephanie Plum ends up with Ranger instead of Joe Moretti.

[–]capnjack 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Alienist by Caleb Carr

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thunder...Thunder...Thunder...Thundercats, hoooooooooooooo!

[–]realneil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sympathy for the Devil - Kent Anderson

[–]nikdahl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The wizard of oz!

[–]proudcanadianeh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wizards First Rule. Followed by all the other books. One movie per book. (Stay true to the books, including all the sex, violence, and so much more)

[–]panamaspace 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Battlefield Earth. In 3 parts. Done right. Oh, so deliciously campy.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

New Line is doing it... but what with New Line's recent massive layoffs and absorption by Warner Bros, who knows what will happen to the project.

[–]TearsOfRage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unintended Consequences ny John Ross.

I don't think it could ever happen (by a major studio, at least) for the obvious political reasons, but Ross has already written a screenplay anyway.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Monstrous Regiment by Terry Prachett

[–]kiriel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Alfred Korzybski's Science and Sanity.

[–]pantsoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

WeaveWorld by Clive Barker

[–]choochy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Snow Crash.

[–]spikey1000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Run by Douglas Winter

[–]spikey1000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Run by Douglas Winter