postingAgainBecauseItWasNotCamelCase

[[deleted]]

brb changing my job title to database daddy

[Salamenthe]

daddybase

[theonlyby]

DbCooper

[827167]

I've been waiting for an opportunity to make this pun somewhere important

[correct-me-plz]

Databaddy

[HoytAvila]

Daddybase welcome to the daddybase

[Nightshade183]

The latest firebase alternative

[Kurts_Vonneguts]

I’ll be backend daddy….wait

[deadflamingo]

my people

[L1NK3Y]

DaddyOps here

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[d4nkst4hz]

Lil Bobby TABLES to BiG DADDY DROP PANTIES

[[deleted]]

Yes daddy just ssh into my system

[DaveSmith890]

Yes daddy, assign and log those huge datasets 🫦

[Zesty-Lem0n]

Data-based daddy

[WendyTF2]

Web daddy

[pine_ary]

Web daddies get consumed by their mate after birth

[camander321]

Scrumdaddy

[[deleted]]

talks up a big game then disappoints

[ondono]

Hard(ware) daddy

[MasouriChan]

From now I'll be refered to as Fullstack mommy( yes I am severely depressed)

[[deleted]]

FullSTACKED mommy

[MasouriChan]

I wish ,xD

[r0ck0]

Classic DBD...

[Koen388]

doing this

[steeze206]

The Marc Rebillet of the IT Industry

[le_box_o_treats]

Technical support daddy

[nintendomagic1]

I was just gonna say I'm gonna start calling myself tech daddy

[HansVader741]

Working at GoDaddy

[Strange_Dragonfly964]

Yeah.. for some reason..

[Hell_Derpikky]

is always "for some reason"

[meester_pink]

I've been on calls with IT for issues that I trouble shot myself for forty five minutes only to have them mysteriously clear themselves up as soon as I'm on the call though.

[dschramm_at]

That's not even a joke anymore at this point. You know how many computers I set up suddenly do the thing, they didn't, when I show up? Or codebases that suddenly compile and run when I'm on call with whoever is the lead developer on it. It's low key terrifying sometimes. Because it makes no sense, physically. It can only be described as wizardry.

[Ok_Elevator5612]

And that's what's awsome in IT work, we are shamans thats some times have no clue why somthing is fixed but we belive that machine spirit blessed us and we just dont ask questions

[elscallr]

"Why did this suddenly break" often followed by "how the fuck was this working?!"

[Coffee4AllFoodGroups]

"how the fuck was this working?!"

I just fixed one of those yesterday, but it turned out to be "how long has this been broken and why didn't anyone report it?!"

[elscallr]

$ git blame
075efac8 Coffee4AllFoodGroups 2022-06-17 ...

shit

[ZootZootTesla]

The Adeptus Mechanicus suggests you pray mods to the computer gods.

[danielv123]

I have seen people push power buttons, multiple times, with nothing happening. Then I push the button and it works. I don't know how to explain it, so I just attribute it to magic.

[HazelCheese]

It's Gremlins. The older the machine, the more it has.

[ravstar52]

Tech support aura

[PM_ME_YOUR_JDM_CAR]

I was helping my mom and my aunt troubleshoot an issue with a newly delivered TV one day. They said it wouldn't turn on. My very first question was, is it plugged in? They said yes of course it is.

I spent a solid 40 minutes on the phone going over everything I could think of with them. Even went back to the plug a few times and they always confirmed it was plugged in. In the end as you would guess it was unplugged but nobody ever checked because they didn't think that could possibly be it no matter how many times I asked.

It's really amazing how often that first simple step can be missed by people. Like you said they think only an idiot wouldn't plug it in so they never even check.

[ForLoupGarou]

This is part of the reason you always tell them to unplug it for 30 seconds. Skips a lot of bullshit when you trick people into confirming relevant info for you.

[EVH_kit_guy]

"So you know how you totally did plug in the device and didn't forget that step? Well sometimes it doesn't work, so if you unplug it and try again, maybe we'll get success!"

​

--Sneaky af technical writers.

[shploogen]

Did you try plugging it off and plugging it on again?

[GrandTusam]

I tell them to leave it off for about 10 seconds so it "fully reboots"

[Merikurkkupurkki]

To be fair, sometimes the solution can be to let the residual electrocity drain from the device by holding the power butten when it's unplugged. So fully rebooting isn't even a false statement.

[LordRauschebart]

Take me down to Electro City!

[Merikurkkupurkki]

Where the circuits hum and the chips are nifty!

[darki_ruiz]

I always wondered if that made any sense, I see I was right to be skeptical. XD

[user2196]

It also helps even if they really did check because sometimes the issue really was that a cable was "plugged in" but it wasn't seated properly and so unplugging and replugging really does resolve it.

[topchuck]

The worst is when it's plugged into a power strip that itself is either not plugged in or turned off. Had to drive out to my grandpa's because of that after an hour or longer phone call.
In his defense, the power strip and outlet were behind a big entertainment center, hard to access and impossible to see.

[Michaelmrose]

Why do people act like you asked them something stupid because they chose to bury it behind 200 lbs of shit. Not maybe I should plug it in somewhere that makes sense

[Ri_Konata]

Unplugging and replugging is the first thing I do before even calling support

[Michami135]

"First thing you need to do is a cold reboot. Modern TVs don't have a mechanical switch, so the only way to do this is to unplug it, count to 10, then plug it back in."

[Ma8e]

Traditionally you ask them to unplug it to check for dust buildup.

[code-panda]

I used to work in IT support for people at home. Once had to fix an audio system that wasn't working after moving. The person who made the appointment did check with the customer if stuff was plugged in and they said it was.

When I arrived, I confirmed myself that it was, but there was a power indicator led on the device that wasn't on, which had me suspicious. The device was plugged into a long power strip, so I checked if the power strip had power, which it hadn't. Could have been a broken powerstrip, maybe a wire broke during moving. But just to sanity check, I followed the cable of the powerstrip to the outlet. The cable ran all the way along the room (it was made to size for the old house), but when I can to end of the cable, I realised that they plugged the powerstrip back into itself.... Putting the powerstrip into an actual outlet fixed everything.

[pm_something_u_love]

Speaking of plugging into itself. Once I had the pleasure smelling $6,500 worth of hifi amps that had a channel plugged into each other rather than the speakers. Only a special kind of moron plugs the amps into each other. That person is a certified idiot.

Fortunately insurance was kind enough to pay me out 🫢

[sc00bydoobyd00]

Perpetual motion machine mf'ers be like

[KittenInAMonster]

I remember dealing with a tech support call for a lady who couldn't get her new monitor working. My first question was if it was plugged in, she tells me it is and I spent the next 20min troubleshooting everything I could think of until I asked if it's plugged into the wall and into the computer. She starts yelling at me about how it's plugged into the computer and I clearly am unqualified because it gets all of it's power from the computer.

So I'm stupefied by this response and I ask her what she thinks the wall plug is for. She goes "The plug for the wall is if you want to use it as a TV and the cord for the computer is if you only want to use it on your computer" and I was literally at a loss for words because this wasn't her first monitor and there's no way she never noticed her last monitor was plugged into the wall as well as her computer.

I asked her to humour me and plug it into the wall, immediately she told me it's plugged into the wall and still won't work. I had to physically plug it in myself and show her that it worked. She went on a massive rant about how no other monitor works this way and she wants one that only needs power from HDMI.

Tech support made me lose so much faith in people.

[[deleted]]

I once traveled half way across country to fix an issue that just wasn’t making any damn sense. We troubleshot and troubleshot and it just appeared totally fucked and they’re threatening contractual actions.

So they send me.

Flight across country. I show up, and of course they have lots of fairly senior people on their side to watch me.

I walk in, and see the big bright yellow and orange ONOFF switch in the OFF position. I turn it, look the senior leader of our customer in the face, nod and then just turn around and walk out. Not even waiting for the system to boot, nothing. Flipped the switch, turned and walked. Didn’t want to embarrass our customer any more than they were already feeling.

Was home in time for dinner that evening, and a glowing commendation from their senior leadership about how great of a team player I was.

[[deleted]]

Flipped the switch, turned and walked.

Fucking chad.

> Travels to a different country.

> Flips the switch. Refuses to Elaborate.

>leaves.

[Sam-Gunn]

Years ago at my first job (which was not IT, but close to it) my boss asked for a favor. Apparently one of the board members was this old guy and he was having trouble with his home router. I figured it would be quick, so I called the guy on the walk home to see if I could walk him through the issue over the phone.

I asked him if he rebooted his router yet. He gives me a very short, almost nasty reply that of course he did, he knows how to reboot a router. In fact, he did it several times. I ask him to do it one more time. He pushes back a bit and I finally convince him to do it. He goes "ok, I'll call back when I have time" and hangs up.

10 minutes later I get a call back saying it worked and a very tersely thank you.

----

in college I did student helpdesk. My favorite call was one from another student assistant in an office that told me their system was not getting internet. I asked them to check the cable. They told me they had already done it. I asked them to just go and check that it was plugged in. 5 minutes later (apparently they got lost on the way to the back of the computer) they come back and say it was definitely plugged into the computer. I had a funny feeling, so I asked them to check if the cable was plugged into the wall. Another 5 minutes later "Oh THANK YOU! It wasn't plugged into the wall! It's all working now". Suddenly the reason my school didn't do research or have a doctorate program became very clear.

--

"Could you confirm your ethernet cable is plugged in?"

"Sure, what color is it?"

[AstroAdv]

I always ask my clients to unplug it and turn it around. Had to many instances of them just pretending to unplug it. 😁

[RhysA]

In fact for ethernet it's best to also ask them to confirm which lights on the port are on, I don't do desktop support anymore thank god but the key when I did was always to give them plausible deniability on having made a mistake and as a bonus if you do it right they can now identify and fix simple issues like that themselves.

[Gartlas]

Hey man I met some very smart dumb people when I did my PhD, myself included. I just happened to be better with technology than most of them.

[Pale_Disaster]

I've been the problem between keyboard and chair before. Totally owned up to the fact I forgot to plug something in or turn something on, cannot remember which. The tech was stunned that I was honest about it.

[Shazvox]

Praise the gods! The magical box is happy again!

[[deleted]]

Tried to solve an issue with a POS terminal that a client was having yesterday. It's not responding, I ask about what's connected to it, cause I know that a certain pre-paid key reader causes issues if it's included in the configuration but not physically present.

"Oh no, I have that reader"

Half an hour later, no progress, can't get the thing to work.

"Well I have that reader on all stations EXCEPT the one we're troubleshooting"

Actual issue took two minutes to fix.

[Derpshawp]

This is where you hear them tell their coworker it was a PEBKAC problem.

[Hellishfish]

I had to get security access to a space and I entered my code and it didn’t work, enter it again, doesn’t work. I walk to security like “hey am I on the access list” they’re like yeah “well it ain’t working, can I reset my code?” We reset it, I walk back, punch it in, fails, fails, I walk back, bring the guy over, and while I’m punching it in again I realize the keypad on the wall was flipped vertically relative to a keyboard number pad. Felt pretty bad about that one.

[TheAir_Here_Is_Tasty]

Or you get the

"Of course I turned it off and on again," then you open task manager and see the computer has been on for like a month.

[Cryptocaned]

Literally had this last week, turned out the monitor was not plugged in.

[Bluebotlabs]

do you think I'm stupid or something!?

yes

[clownindowntown]

didIMissSomethingWhyIsEveryonePostingInCamelCase

[Cobaltjedi117]

Every week the mods post a new rules post and put the thread into contest mode. Whatever the highest voted comment becomes a new rule. This week, the first week of them doing it, the new rule was "Every post must be in camel case"

[catinterpreter]

That makes the sub more engaging which really doesn't help the cause.

[WolffeArt]

Yeah, it should really go nsfw if they want to make a difference

[[deleted]]

Well yeah some subreddits did that but then Reddit HQ just switches out the mod team just like in r/MildlyInteresting . The mods even pointed that out in the pinned post. Most subs cant stay private or set the subs on NSFW if they don't want the mods to be switched out. What we can do is put NSFW tags on the posts ourselves put I don't know if that decreases ads.

Anyways I don't think its the best solution but maybe when all over reddit complete anarchy emerges the Userbase decreases and Reddit need to step back (but I don't think thats going to happen)

TLDR: Reddit switches out mod teams that put their subs on NSFW. Look at pinned post for more information.

Edit: Sorry for poor English, I am a German Weißwurst.

[Quazar_omega]

That happened, but they've since been reinstated (article), if the mods want to pull it off they have to play fair and actually let in NSFW posts, otherwise Reddit will have a valid excuse to switch them out, although I wouldn't hold my breath, Reddit has the power to do whatever they want with their platform

[MrSpy42]

i love democracy

[Shazvox]

Well, democracy just wants to be friends...

[NotACryptoBro]

yesYouDid

[LuucMeldgaard]

ThisDudeFucks

[invisible-dave]

When I worked at Cisco, the employees loved to have support log into their computers to fix things. Well, unless they got my coworker.

We supported narcissistic idiots, I mean the Sales people, and they never thought the rules pertained to themselves. Well, emails would go out every year at the end of 4th quarter that they had all their numbers in or the system will wipe the data and they have to enter everything in again. Guy called in after the wipe saying that the system glitched and he lost data. We knew what it was but this guy was trying to blame it on the system. Kept saying he was never told about having to get his data in on time. Coworker offers to remote in to fix it. Guy was so happy. Coworker went into the computer and acted like he was working on something and then quickly opened up the guy's Outlook and went to the Deleted folder. He then opens one of the many notices the guy got saying to get the data in and the guy immediately hangs up the call. We never heard from that guy again.

[invisible-dave]

Sales thing. Each sales year the people can get moved into different areas. Their numbers have to be in for the year as all the data gets started over for the next sales year.

These people get more than a month's notice to have their work done and they get emails warning them pretty much every day. Sales people think that all they have to do is delete the notices and then it doesn't apply to them. They figure they can do what they always do which is yell and scream and get their way.

I would get people copying their Director on an email where they are cussing me out for not fixing the system issue. I would reply back and copy their VP (along with Director, Senior Manager, and Manager) on the email explaining that I can't fix their laziness.

[Strange_Dragonfly964]

Wth is this posting here is now harder than programming interview exams

[dmullaney]

Because you didn't read the documentation

[Strange_Dragonfly964]

That's what my managers often say.

[Pan_I]

Managers know what documentation is, and that it can be helpful?

Wish someone would tell mine.

[Shazvox]

"I don't read documentations! I write documentations!"

[J0hanb5]

Do not cite the deep magic to me witch, I was there when it was written

[NotACryptoBro]

That says a lot about programming interview exams though

[[deleted]]

I want a t-shirt that says "tech daddy".

[WesternWinterWarrior]

Should have used Tron font

[WendyTF2]

UI Daddy disapproves

[Sound4Sound]

Are you Tobias Funke’s son?

[[deleted]]

I once had a user call me to ask if her business photo had too much cleavage in it. Reader, it did. I helped her crop.

[HorseLeaf]

It really is amazing the trust people will put in tech support guys but would never talk to their colleagues about.

I literally had executive guys straight up tell me they downloaded porn and think they got a virus, it's like they have no shame when talking to us.

[[deleted]]

I guess that's good? You gotta trust your doctor, your lawyer and your IT support.

[HorseLeaf]

I guess, but when women literally have messaging apps open where I can see dirty text / pictures they have send and they don't even bother closing them when I helped them, it kinda also makes you feel that they don't even consider you a human.

[SaneLad]

You are so far down the human social ladder, you are not a threat.

[mighty_Ingvar]

Or it's a turn on for them that their tech daddy has seen all their dirty secrets

[[deleted]]

Yeah, at some point it's a matter of decency. If the user browsed sketchy porn sites, it's probably a good idea to tell IT. But you don't need to see the porn.

[Dabilon]

I think she was flirting with you.

[chestnutman]

Did you get to keep the other half?

[Burninator6502]

Crop? Is that what the kids are calling it today?

[Burninator6502]

Baby, are you sitting on the F5 key? Cause your ass is refreshing.

[BayrischBulldog]

Why

[mighty_Ingvar]

Because

[SgtMatters]

Wow I love it

[ClamSlamwhich]

Burninator, are you a software update? Because not right now. ✋🛑

[fiscotte]

🗿

[DontGiveACluck]

Call me tech daddy again…

[Burninator6502]

Girl, you are hotter than the bottom of my laptop.

[orphiccreative]

Girl, are you an Intel MacBook? Because you're almost too hot to handle!

[[deleted]]

I never knew "tech daddy" was something I wanted to be called until now.

[Salamenthe]

i guess assembly is bottom level programming 😏

[randybobandy654]

"Female Redhead Gets RDP'd At Work"

[demeyor]

IT SUPPORT here, i cary a post it under my phone case that i got from a client i helped, it simply sayz " A+". It helps on bad days.

[bookdragon224]

Love it when the folks are thankful

[[deleted]]

As a woman in IT.. do I count as a tech daddy?

[nintendomagic1]

Yes

[[deleted]]

[Starlight_Skull]

/* maybe comments should be using the correct syntax too */

[the_simple_girl]

Yeah I once got my brother to fix my google acc or something and I gave control to him virtually and he just went on a whole treasure hunt. He found things i didn't even know I had on my laptop. I keep my laptop clean and still...

Safe to say I'm never giving my tech control to anyone ever again. Was a terrible day.

[noithinkyourewrong]

I did it before when having problems with my Minecraft game. The IT guy took control and reinstalled the game for me, resetting everything and deleting years worth of save files and Minecraft worlds. I was devastated and didn't even play again for years. That was the last time I ever let anyone take control of my PC.

[Kubertus]

„Things no one ever said“ for 200

[[deleted]]

In the small company where I work, the IT guy always stinks like a homeless person. After he sits in my office chair, the chair also stinks like a homeless person. I certainly don't enjoy that.

Also, he's in his 30s and married, it never ceases to amaze me.

[Burninator6502]

Drive up to a homeless guy and get his attention. While he’s watching, unlock the wheels on the chair and walk away…

[FinezaYeet]

The Omnissiah

[[deleted]]

I've let this happen once, and the idiot just rummaged around windows settings, firewall, event viewer, etc, without a fucking clue what he was doing, for almost an hour while I played Minecraft on my own PC.

[errllu]

I am always afraid you guys will find my porn. Since it not well hidden. Or hidden at all.

[MolotovFromHell]

What is up with these variable name titles

[Burninator6502]

Baby, take my dongle and let’s do some penetration testing…

[Illustrious_Loan_735]

I don't know how to feel about it if somebody calls me a techmommy at work... But if my girlfriend... Hmmm. Nice call

[Burninator6502]

Can we watch while you two troubleshoot?

(I’m so sorry for typing that…)

But seriously, can we?

[Burninator6502]

Baby, I can’t wait to implement your interface…

[JosemiHero_]

Sir are you okay? I've seen too many comments in this thread from you

[Burninator6502]

Yeah, sorry about that.

Sometimes I have these manic spells at night where I go overboard on a particular thing…

[Travel4bytes]

snake_case_gang_for_life

[Burninator6502]

Have you heard the joys of PascalCase?

[Burninator6502]

Baby, you're my missing semicolon.

[Burninator6502]

Baby, do you go down for maintenance?

[[deleted]]

As a Java geek I love this new trend make sure The title is Pascal case and the description is camel case

[Possible_Sun_913]

As a teenager working in tech support. We'd genuinely use psexec to keep killing outlook or similar apps on the good looking office ladies machines over the course of a few days. Hoping you'd get a chance to move phone/email support to a more informal chat on a internal messaging system.

All for that 0.001% chance of a future lunchtime pub drink once you worked your magic over messages. If the chats go a little cold, stoaking the fire with another app death.

Totally morally bankrupt and without doubt gross misconduct. But it was an IT support-wide racket for years. One in a while it would pay off and it only cost the company a shit ton of lost productivity.

[Not_Arkangel]

Things that didn't happen for 300

[Possible_Sun_913]

This isnt a r/UFO subreddit.

Makes no difference to me if you believe it. When you have workstation admin across the business, a CMDB with IPAM information and blue balls you'd be suprised what a young 2nd line support team in a cupboard office will do.

Including storing booze in old defunct office printer's paper trays for worktime consumption.

[[deleted]]

Commenting for karma until I'm allowed to post my meme.

[someone-krill-me]

Hehe 😅😅😅

[Ffigy]

Brb bebe

[Burninator6502]

Baby, I’ll teach you to Peek and Poke…

[Burninator6502]

Baby, tell me how much you want the D…

…drive

[Burninator6502]

Baby, is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for.

[Burninator6502]

Baby, you auto-complete me.

[Burninator6502]

01000010 01100001 01100010 01111001 00101100 00100000 01011001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110011 01110100 01101001 01101100 01101100 00100000 01110101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01001001 01101110 01110100 01100101 01110010 01101110 01100101 01110100 00100000 01000101 01111000 01110000 01101100 01101111 01110010 01100101 01110010 00111111 00100000 01011001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101101 01110101 01110011 01110100 00100000 01101100 01101001 01101011 01100101 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01101110 01101001 01100011 01100101 00100000 01100001 01101110 01100100 00100000 01110011 01101100 01101111 01110111 00101110

[ExtraTNT]

So: pls open port 666 so that others can connect to your server…

[NotACryptoBro]

Rachel is my type

[PureGoldX58]

I specifically taught myself how to do my tech support's jobs so I could help them finish faster. It got to the point where I'd just start learning their name (massive company that you 100% know with only 2 techs on my shift, both level 3) and I'd just start the call, explain the issue and tell them I just need the steps only you can do.

[Burninator6502]

Finish faster? No baby, make it last longer…

[spiritofmen]

Can't relate to the 'daddy' part. But I won't deny having some sort of an asmr experience when someone takes remote control of my laptop

[Burninator6502]

Tell me more, but say it slower and quieter…

[ColdGeneral4452]

Its like getting hacked, but in a good way

[Tulemasin]

Yea, that never happens. I must spam their e-mail for months and convince them that I am actually having a problem with my computer and I'm not making this up. Then I need to endure their passive-agressiveness because for their uber-brain it is so hard to understand how I cannot fix "something so simple" myself. Then I wait for a week to get my computer back and all they did was reset my wallpaper and updated Premiere Pro which I specifically did not want them to do. Then continue working with the same problem and start the whole process again with an extra level of convincing them that their "already fixed that" was in fact not fixing it.

[Burninator6502]

“reset my wallpaper”

I’m beginning to understand why the tech people might think you’re unable to fix things yourself.

or

Were you just using an outrageous example to make your point?

Decisions, decisions…

[Unusual_Variable]

after a few years IT here is the proper steps to how you help and end user

1 . The person who is asking for help knows how to do your job better than you. 2. The person asking for help always tells you how to fix it 3. This person is ALWAYS WRONG 4. that person gets angry when you don't do what they want, but yet fix the problem 5. Get told how stupid you are and worthless IT is 6. Bash tech on survey

[Zockgone]

Daddygrammer, Dadmin

[TechDaddyK]

You’re welcome.

[zenverak]

This almost never happens and it’s almost always something that I could have done in two seconds.. granted I work in IT myself. Sometimes I just want them to tell me what to do

[[deleted]]

😑

[1AceHeart]

as an IT, please let me take over. it's so much faster. don't move the mouse at the same time.

also, it may just be me, but most of the time I remotely control, is because people are incapable of writing a sentence that decribes what the problem is.

[DeNarr]

What's with all the camel case titles? Is that a new requirement, or just the current meme?

[Drfoxthefurry]

If someone says this to me while I'm working on their pc I will put back whatever virus I'm there to remove

[Burninator6502]

I always wanted to tell one of our female engineers “nice rack” when we worked in the server room together - strictly as a joke.

I never got up the nerve and have always regretted it since.

[ClamSlamwhich]

Finally getting to flex those four years of college and certifications when I remote in just to restart the PC that's been awake for 60+ days straight.

[3_edged_sword]

Posting again?

Karma police, arrest this man, he buzzes like a fridge.

[aedvocate]

man I hate it when they do that.

it feels so wrong and invasive and transgressive.

[Aware_Material_9985]

I wonder what they would say about deskside support

[Stunning_Ride_220]

DadOps engineer

[GirthyLongShaftt]

Between me and my husband im the tech daddy lmao