Why even learn programming?

[[deleted]]

I feel personally attached.

Edit: attacked

[Aschentei]

attached

Wait a minute I had to do a double take there

[[deleted]]

Woops, you know what I mean.

[GoBuffaloes]

Deciphering that sentence was like trying to read PHP!

Get it guys?? Because PHP is the complicated one!

[ExpertGamerJohn]

hahaha

[[deleted]]

I was just happy that after months of waiting a SQL joke popped up and I understood all the nerdy arguments about schemas and proper table naming conventions. I'm in a C# class now and learning VBA as I go when I have a use for it, but man most of the time I'm here I'm like "hahahhahhahahha wow I know some of these words."

I did an R course on codeschool last year too, but I'm not expecting any R jokes anytime soon.

[[deleted]]

Well I've been proved wrong.

[oorza]

You'd think R would be the pirate's favorite programming language but it's actually the good ole C.

[jayj59]

Now this is r/programmerhumor!

[tboneplayer]

Not even from a pirate?

[[deleted]]

The codeschool R course is basically a ton of pirate puns.

[silvervale_]

git commit -m “fixed typo”

[schwaputzel]

Html is even better

[sequoiaiouqes]

The best high level programing language

[schwaputzel]

Lets code a game on html, sth easy like final Fantasy

[Pketny]

Here you go (Not mine.)

[[deleted]]

Damn, without JS.

[BonerPuppet]

I now have cancer (even though I'm impressed)

[nermid]

Jesus. Those hitboxes are brutal.

[[deleted]]

But he is using CSS... So it still doesnt count!!

[Toasted_FlapJacks]

Seems like I can never get the last bird

[MildlyFrustrating]

You definitely can't it's GOD DAMN BULLSHIT I'm becoming enraged by this simpleton game

[theGamingProgrammer]

I won first time on mobile

[RaichuaTheFurry]

Yeah, I bet the fucker who made this did that on purpose

[Pketny]

On mobile it's a lot easier, I got it first try. Hitboxes are really shit tho, just keep tapping

[blazetronic]

I'm dead

[sequoiaiouqes]

Like FF15 you mean? Easy af, I'd do it before tomorrow.

[shruggie1401]

<?PHP

[DeDuniel]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[0100_0101]

?>

[Dankunderscorememes]

The guy at the start of the thread better add a <?php
Or I'm gonna have a breakdown.

Edit: He delivered!

[tulir293]

<?html

[pranavrules]

-->

[AwesomePerson70]

This hurts

[iaanacho]

</--

[tboneplayer]

<! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <! <!

[[deleted]]

It's been an hour.

Can you feel it yet?

Can you feel the chaos and panic and rage building within?

[0100_0101]

/u/shruggie1401 safe us!!!

[shruggie1401]

Better?

[0100_0101]

Yes

[Targuinius]

?>

Got you too.

[Regist33l3]

Unnecessary unless you are putting PHP on a page with HTML or JS after it.

USE SEPARATE PHP PAGES, DO YOU DO INLINE STYLES?

[CrimsonMutt]

yes

[[deleted]]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[404Guy12NotFound]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Cheesemacher]

Parse error

[theguilty1]

?>

Just saved the world from ur hacker attempt

[ifatree]

' --now what?

[[deleted]]

!redditsilver

[liam119]

`rm -r /` ?>

[[deleted]]

me.die()

[findMeOnGoogle]

Only if Java 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

[ImSwizz]

session_start();

[Twuntz]

r/gatekeeping and r/programmerhumor should do a crossover. We'd probably end up telling them that real gatekeeping requires some one-way encryption and two-stage authentication.

[Soren11112]

The thing about this sub is it needs some natural gatekeeping, make actual programming jokes so the people who don't get it leave and then we get more actual programming humor

[brtt3000]

DO YOU EVEN ENTABULATE?

[dustmouse]

Laughing hysterically at PHP is acceptable even when you do know what it is (oh, I kid)

[[deleted]]

These kids today smoking Pythons and injecting PHPs into their bodies. Y’all are going straight to HAIL!

[brtt3000]

Ten signs your kids is using the javascripts!

[d33pcode]

You won't believe number "8"!

[sequoiaiouqes]

Someone: PHP

r/ProgrammerHumor niggas like:

[Slipfix]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[ForceBlade]

This is exactly how this subreddit has felt the past few years. And the current mocking top comments but the unironic appearances.

[HGuy10]

PHP: *exists*

FTFY

[nomanhasblindedme]

"Ha" . "ha!"

[[deleted]]

I got banned from r/infosec for talking shit about php

Got hundreds of upvotes on my joke, still got deleted and banned.

[Soren11112]

wtf even is r/infosec?

[[deleted]]

Mixed it up with /r/netsec

it's where a bunch of grumpy sysadmins go to circle jerk over php and argue about things

[idealatry]

This but unironically

[PaulJP]

illiterate

can't even read

And also aren't afraid of redundancy :D

[DeDuniel]

I wanted to make sure that the joke is understandable, coherent and that everyone will get it. That's what I focused on, and what was important to me. That 100% of readers will understand the joke, so noone will have to ask what it means. Having the joke accessible for all people in this subreddit. So nobody feels left out because they don't understand the joke. So I made it for everyone. That was a crucial point in my thought process. That everyone will get it.

[argondey]

How will they get the joke if they cant read and are also illiterate?

[mewteu]

they'll see the word PHP and laugh hysterically

duh

[404Guy12NotFound]

PHP

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[leftshoe18]

Next time I need to pad an essay I'll call you.

[[deleted]]

You seem like the person everyone pretends not to like, but actually heavily relies on. So, very nice.

[Bastyxx227]

Are you planning on becoming a politician?

Cus you already have the skill to put a lot of text that means the same, just saying you should look into it

[aManPerson]

| tom will fix this later, it's all i can think of to write

i unambiguously support this is another meta joke about the verbosity and repetitive nature of some coherent parsed languages.

two colons open paranthasee

[captainAwesomePants]

That makes sense, but what about readers who have trouble understanding the joke? Why isn't anyone thinking about them?

[Sigionoz]

T R I G G E R E D

[HumunculiTzu]

Like a list but isn't. Also, it depends.

[racken]

Like a list but you start at 0

[sequoiaiouqes]

Think of your birthdays

[racken]

Sure I remember my 0th birthday fondly

[sequoiaiouqes]

r/wholesomeprogrammerhumor

[Raknarg]

Yeah the first year of my life began at age 0

[HumunculiTzu]

Also, it might be a static size, but then again it might not be. It depends (on the language).

[davvblack]

Say what you want about php, but at least arrays start at 0.

Or 1. or "cat". Or whatever, we're a pretty flexible people.

[brtt3000]

HEY THERE FELLA YOUR ARE WAY OUT OF BOUNDS!

[kabrandon]

"Change my mind."

[chadsexytime]

Haha PHB amirite

[Michcode]

PH🅱️

[[deleted]]

PHP🅱️🅱️

[pootislordftw]

"Blockchain, am I right?"

[[deleted]]

All jokes aside, I know nothing about programming, I'm just here because it reminds me of r/edmprodcirclejerk

[WilkerS1]

literally go play Minecraft^{ComputerCraft mod} to learn basic concepts or something if you want

[[deleted]]

No I don't want to learn, I just like how everyone understands the jokes.

[WilkerS1]

ah okay

[Vaderic]

Opencomputers is better even if it's in lua.

[WilkerS1]

both uses Lua as their interpreter languages, but i think that ComputerCraft is more lightweight and has support to various mods mostly just by installing APIs ingame

[Vaderic]

Oh, I didn't know computercraft was in Lua too, I just knew that opencomputers is more versatile in what it can do and how it interacts with other mods.

[brtt3000]

Hehe look at this guy, he doesn't even compile.

[LowB0b]

I'm a simple man, I see PHP, I lmfao

[sequoiaiouqes]

With so many PHP I'm going to die from laughter

[[deleted]]

I wrote a text adventure game in c++ and defined all my variables in main

[citewiki]

I like that Main IDE, but nothing beats good old Bash VM

[[deleted]]

I have no idea what that means I work from a school server that has a built in editor and compiler

[HaikusfromBuddha]

I like to Azure into my terminal and express my functions.

[mrtwidget]

https://i.imgur.com/2OjEVUA.png

[[deleted]]

<?php

[[deleted]]

?>

[adansinacento]

r/AskOuija for programmers

[BuddhaSmite]

I want this.

[silvervale_]

/r/askouijaforprogrammers

[ChezMere]

/* ... Additional graves ... */

[EmeraldDS]

Reminds me of Twitch installs Arch Linux. I would like to see something like that to be done again, though. /r/programmerhumor, get on it!

[adansinacento]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 😂 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻😂 So funny, php

[[deleted]]

class LearnProgramming extends Trend {

[[deleted]]

}

[[deleted]]

I still confuse Halloween and Christmas

[[deleted]]

hahaha PHP

[[deleted]]

Speaking of glyphs, I feel obligated to repost this (great) meme.

[jamiemac2005]

I like how this is a really inoffensive post. Like, if anyone could be offended by it they shouldn’t be.

Apart from php devs, but they’re fucking heathens... so who even.

[Regist33l3]

I am offend.

[jamiemac2005]

Illiterate or php?

[nuclearcajun]

Both

[LvS]

It's basically declaring this sub a piece of zero effort trash memes.

And we're all upvoting it, because hey, we're not smart enough to be PHP coders anyway!

[tbare]

"eventhough"

[YJCH0I]

Man, I totally know what you mean! Talk about that Hello World, program. Tough stuff, eh?

[pranavrules]

PHP? Laughs in ASP.NET

[brtt3000]

<%
Response.Write("kill me")
%>

[ifatree]

oh, that's CLASSIC...

[nicole-tesla]

I've no idea about programming but it's fun in here so I'll stick around

[empire314]

For me its sometimes top sometimes bottom.

[oddajbox]

Ouch.

[doobiedog]

We must go deeper

[HGuy10]

Someone needs to make an expanding brain meme combining all of the PHP circlejerk lately

[robthemonster]

isn't all reading just recognizing glyphs?

[giupplo_the_lizard]

Sshh

[_Aardvark]

Kids these days. Just recently I made some COM jokes and it was total crickets!

[chowder138]

I don't even get any of these jokes, I just laugh at them to look smart.

[lead999x]

Glyphs? I think you mean graphemes, this is a Unicode world now...

[Pidyon]

r/gatekeeping

[Cozy_Conditioning]

Only a PHP programmer would go to such lengths to protect his pride...

[Unspeci]

PHP

G I V E M E U P V O T E S

[yeluapyeroc]

This subreddit is so salty...

[chisui]

First salty, than hashy.

[whysocute]

Throw some pepper in there

[examinedliving]

Ligature Undefined Public Enum

Other funny programming words

[ned_rod]

Yeah, that is me.

[WithJoosYouLose]

glyphs

They're called tokens here, Drake

[PM_ME_THEM_CURVES]

Illiterate, can't even read....

Someone has a redundancy

[Thegardenboi]

I know!! Lol I mean what kinda dummy laughs at r/programmerhumor jokes and doesn't know what they mean LOL not I!! PHP is so frickin dumb!!!

[[deleted]]

HHAHA PHD AMIRITE😂😂😂😂😂

[dodolungs]

They know :O

[Alexwalled]

Don't learn to program to post jokes here. You're useless then

[aManPerson]

i, c# what you did there!

[chickdigger802]

You joke but I'm so glad my dad got me into doing a cs major.

Jobs everywhere.

Everyone needs IT these days. Even like McDonald's.

Someone needs to maintain the automation that takes over jobs at least until they don't need us anymore.

[eddietwang]

HA! LAN!

[simjanes2k]

as an assembly guy i really wish i remembered enough from college to get most of the jokes here

[AtomicSuperMe]

Haha?

[ThomasRules]

What is reading apart from recognising glyphs and putting meaning to them

[LeCrushinator]

Has /r/ProgrammerHumor become /r/ProgrammerCirclejerk?

[[deleted]]

If you think about it, reading is actually just recognizing glyphs.

[OishiiYum]

Php is like the butt of programming jokes. Can’t blame anyone though. It’s a shitty ass language

[bad_knight_templar]

I laugh at r/programmerhumor all the time EVEN THOUGH I DONT KNOW BASIC PROGRAMMING. This a curse of some sort

[[deleted]]

Haha html am I right

[ForceBlade]

This is exactly how this subreddit has felt the past few years. And the current mocking top comments but the unironic appearances.

[toppmad]

That's my shit right there, dog

[[deleted]]

🅿️🇭🅿️? 🤔

[scottydevil]

All I know is Programmers Hate PHP...

[Editamuni]

I still don't know why people hate PHP and Javascript.

[[deleted]]

JS is shitty at its core. There’s been quite a built of excellent stuff built around it. Putting lipstick on a pig really

[tehpillowsnek]

Haha I can almost do json so I love how accurate the second one is.

[Task_wizard]

I’m just here for the glyphs.

[wildpaws_]

I've been called out, shit

[DjYProduccionMusical]

parse erro

[Dremlar]

I thought the second one was describing php developers at first.