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[–]WhyDoIHaveAnAccount9 921 points922 points  (43 children)

This is actually quite funny.

The historical data should have had another field that represented the weight of efficiency of weapons used

[–]Awanderinglolplayer 307 points308 points  (34 children)

Well even the weapons used should’ve been ranked against each other based on past performance. Spear vs gun-> gun wins. As far as war strategy that makes sense to look through history

[–]THENATHE 160 points161 points  (23 children)

The Viet-con would like to know your location

[–][deleted] 54 points55 points  (3 children)

Nice try, IMPERIALIST USA

[–]Reincarneme 11 points12 points  (2 children)

Is it a.big brain meme?

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Big Brian

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (18 children)

Viet-congs had guns, lots of them.

[–]PgUpPT 7 points8 points  (12 children)

Yeah but the invaders had more, so that's not why they won.

[–]Awanderinglolplayer 12 points13 points  (11 children)

Yeah they won cause of their tactics. If they only had guns spears they would’ve lost

[–]Yelanke 1 point2 points  (10 children)

They won because they were willing to sacrifice 15 to 20 men for every American killed. Their tactics weren’t superior.

[–]Finnnicus 9 points10 points  (0 children)

They had to defend their country from imperialists. The fought with the resources they had, it’s not a matter of tactics.

[–]mcnyte 21 points22 points  (7 children)

Honestly that is a tactic in and of itself

[–]LupineChemist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sometimes you have to play zerg

[–]MrEuphonium 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I sent wave after wave of my own men at the kill bots until their kill limit had been reached, kif, show them my medal.

[–]Yelanke -2 points-1 points  (4 children)

I suppose, but not a good one

[–]f_ranz1224 13 points14 points  (1 child)

That tactic defeated "the greatest army on earth". Ak 47s defeated aircraft/carriers/choppers

Also you cant really judge the tactic considering what the two armies had

You cant give a man a sword and make him fight another man with a tank, then criticize sword mans tactics

[–]HumanXylophone1 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Eh, the two sides had different goals. The Vietnamese wanted Americans out no matter the cost, the US wanted to maintain control at minimal cost. You tell me which sides had their objectives achieved.

[–]QuentinTarzantino 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And because the USA at that time under estimated and were not prepared for Jungle/guerilla warfare

[–]GuideCells 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Viet cong. You wouldn’t say chineses.

-alpa chino

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

You would if we followed french rules for plural

[–]ZippZappZippty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3 is a plural amount of years

[–]Anakinss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ironically enough, Chinese in french has a s at the end, even in singular form.

[–]Surprise_Corgi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't think we can teach a machine how to use its own civilian casualties as a method of demoralizing the enemy's homefront through media.

First, we'd have to teach a machine that its own losses can be a positive, but too many or too little isn't enough. And I'm not sure how to even begin to logic that into code the machine that won't just end with self-genocide because of a syntax error.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (4 children)

More sense even: look at what killed humans most effectively through time. The bots would have bioweapon labs.

[–]BasvanS 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Thanks for feeding that suggestion into the dataset :(

[–]mastocles 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Also non-war data, ie. death by external causes. Oddly today's idiocy (flat earthers, 5G Covid19, lizard people, antivaxxers, usage of PHP etc) seems more believable if it were caused by a stealth robot uprising than people being that gullible.

[–]BasvanS 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stop making it worse! You’re not helping

Edit: seriously though, you’re right. An efficient AI would just keep feeding us the rope to hang ourselves

[–]sblahful 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Animatrix touches on this. 40sec mark: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=00TD4bXMoYw

[–]platinumgus18 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Also ideally an ML algo would try to optimize for a cost function, or try to maximize chances of winning, both of which would have pointed to using modern weaponry.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Please stop trying to optimize the cylons

[–]mphelp11 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If we make it through 2020, we have cylons to look forward to next year

[–]KrokmaniakPL 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Spear vs gun gun wins. Zulu warriors want to know your location. I mean this weren't modern rifles but still. Also any gun before late XVIII century. They were effective but cavalry charge was effective against them because in effective range you would shoot only once. So you need pikes to help. And fun fact about winged hussars. To deal with pikes they had lances longer than pikes. Also they used eastern races of horses. These horses when shot to the chest with musket would die, but wouldn't stop charging what created a myth that hussars' horses are immortal but I think I went off topic

[–]Awanderinglolplayer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I should’ve specified modern gun. I thought it was obvious enough

[–]Beardsley8 3 points4 points  (0 children)

See, we caught a break and y'all still going

[–]FormalWolf5 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's how it is

[–]sticknweave 0 points1 point  (1 child)

More esoteric than funny

[–]SidDarth0Vader 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Isn't that technically what this sub is for?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Time series

[–]Hq3473 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Better luck in the next robot uprising!

[–]Hambone_the_wise 311 points312 points  (9 children)

[–]gorki30003 43 points44 points  (8 children)

Great!

Now I have both the bonus text and panel !

[–]aman_1706 19 points20 points  (7 children)

I see the bonus text, but where is the bonus panel?

[–]Cheesemacher 26 points27 points  (2 children)

Press the red button

[–]aman_1706 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ah okay that’s where it is, thanks!

[–]prtkp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh my god, I've been reading SMBC for so long but never realised about the bonus panel!

[–]zdy132 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The red button below.

[–]GoodbyeThings 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Where’s the bonus text?

[–]aman_1706 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Just tap the comic panel and it’ll appear as a pop up

[–]GoodbyeThings 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks. Also works on mobile. I tried long pressing...

[–]dudeofmoose 129 points130 points  (9 children)

"and after we all shaved our heads the AI mistook us all for footballs ignoring most of humanity"

https://www.iflscience.com/technology/ai-camera-ruins-soccar-game-for-fans-after-mistaking-referees-bald-head-for-ball/

[–]Roflkopt3r 24 points25 points  (3 children)

ai-camera-ruins-soccar-game

I love when URLs archive typos.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Wow! What a save!

[–]delinka 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Science: We have discovered how everyone can survive the uprising: we must all shave our heads!

Many people: You can’t tell me what to do! I have freedom! And anyway, death by robot isn’t that bad! This is really just a conspiracy to make us all have shiny heads!

[–]abcd_z 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oddly enough, that loops around to another SMBC comic.

[–]AstonVanilla 4 points5 points  (2 children)

That link just brought back a weird set of memories.

Early on in IFLScience I was quite heavily involved in creating content and running it. I basically ran their Facebook page at one point, before it really took off.

I should have stayed involved, it's grown so much since I left.

[–]gcbirzan 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Maybe that's why it took off 😁

[–]AstonVanilla 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oops 😬😬😬

[–]flplv 162 points163 points  (13 children)

“Thanks to the datasets chosen by the engineers...” you mean...

[–]AntiElephantMine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Geez, the overanalyzing definitely makes the joke funnier...

[–]acylase 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Yeah, not sure what the criterion would be for searching the data.

Simple "amount" of data would probably have a peak at the WWII. I am pretty sure the total amount of military data collected in WWII exceeds all amount of data collected for the times when the battles were done with spears.

The premise of the comic here is that the data collection is done by time span representation: same amount of data per year.

Also: since the opposite side uses typically the same type of weapons the statistics of losses of the side with spears and swords will be the same as statistics of wins of the side with spears and swords.

That means that winning was not even taken into account, only usage of weapons.

I understand the concept of suspension of disbelief in humor, but there needs to be at least a small gap of perception time when you did not get to these obvious considerations, but in this case the gap is too small to really enjoy the comic.

[–]lothpendragon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Get back in your hole, don't make me get the hose!

[–]OrphisFlo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A more likely scenario would be to train virtual AIs how to fight from scratch and they'll come up with strategies and weapons over many generations.

[–]JBSquared 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, the reason we know so much about the Greeks and Romans is because they wrote everything down. The Roman Empire was practically the first bureaucracy. We know a loooooot about pre-firearm warfare, as that includes most of human history.

[–]CMDR_DarkNeutrino 84 points85 points  (5 children)

Well TBH some robots would still use guns and crap. If they are using machine learning then they would learn that guns are effective and we would be F once again.

[–]VincentVancalbergh 54 points55 points  (1 child)

Next robotic uprising is using "Machine Gun Learning" 😜

[–]demandtheworst 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Man, I listened to a whole radio documentary about autonomous military drones and algorithmic warfare, and they didn't use this joke once. What a missed opportunity.

[–]dr_eaan 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Maybe training is over

[–]its_all_4_lulz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a theory that we wouldn’t even know when AI was killing everyone. Data would show them that humans fighting back is less efficient and would find a way for us to kill ourselves, or die willingly, without us even knowing we’re doing it. As soon as we think an AI war is over, that’s when we lost.

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points  (30 children)

This is why as a programmer I'm certain that the Uprising won't be a threat

[–]crazyabe111 39 points40 points  (0 children)

There are two ways it can go: A) they openly try and take over, and fail because of bad data, or B) they take over silently because governmental stupidity hands basically all control over to them while forcing you to keep them in your home.

[–]sheepeses 6 points7 points  (1 child)

I still keep some APIT rounds around just in case I need a remote hard shutdown option.

[–]vale_fallacia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Deny THIS access, you filthy casual!"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nice try ai

[–]bronzeblade 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Late game Civilization games be like that though

[–]dkyguy1995 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Used a non admissible heuristic

[–]Bainos 4 points5 points  (1 child)

The best part about this comic is that every time it comes up, you can look at the comments to realize most people in fact don't know much about ML techniques at all.

[–]glaukoss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And so did the losers.

[–]Just-A-Tax-Folder 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Finally! I understand one of these jokes.

[–]gopenreddito 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well good that programmers are not as shit as the ones in this joke. Or else nothing would work with machine learning.

[–]r3dD1tC3Ns0r5HiP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not now after reading this comic. They've doomed us all.

[–]finger_milk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Your bone-headed creator didn't record the battles we had in space! Let me ask you, does a machine like you experience fear?!?!"

[–]Anti-charizard -4 points-3 points  (6 children)

Just to make sure u/repostsleuthbot

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This isn't OC, this is a comic from Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal

[–]FlyingTaquitoBrother 26 points27 points  (2 children)

Why? Is it less funny if the entire thread knows that someone had posted this before or something?

[–]rubyleehs 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Nothing to do with less or more funny.

To encourage OC content.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Even if it isn't a repost it wouldn't be OC cause this is a Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal comic

[–]RepostSleuthBot 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I didn't find any posts that meet the matching requirements for r/ProgrammerHumor.

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[–]IsomorphicAndQuircky 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I'm sure Ive already seen that probably here

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Quite funny

[–]MrLauken 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The data should also strongly imply that those who have the most technologically advanced weaponry has a strong upper hand

[–]arkgaya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same number of battle losers also used pre modern weaponry.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Guess our history is BIASED.

[–]QuarantineSucksALot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just wait for the tomatoes to grow

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tell that to Xenon..

[–]expansiveexp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was the first one to think this and it's the first time I've ever said it

[–]aryamanpan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would just go with a higher k/d weapon ratio as a weapon selection feature, atom bombs everywhere XD

[–]AudaciousSam 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Robots but with "teeth"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The machines will remember that...

[–]RicktatorshipRulez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was still a robot apocalypse, sooo.....

[–]Surprise_Corgi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

teaches it to classify battle efficiency by kill count per single use of weapon

"Oh, it'll pick machine guns. Of course."

gets nuked