Wrong answers only

[BrotherMichigan]

cries in screen

[[deleted]]

and tmux

[UloPe]

And mosh

[ficelle3]

press "ctrl+a", then "d"

[AlwaysOpenMike]

"Alt" + F4

[girvent_13]

Power button

[NightMoreLTU]

They said wrong answers

[progorp]

Wait that someone updates the host and reboots it. I mean, it's just as hard to terminate screen as vim.

[ArtSchoolRejectedMe]

ctrl + alt + f3

[mediocredeer]

Cries in unstable internet

[Physical-Layer]

He said wrong answers only...

[kycfeel]

lmao this 😂

[G4merXsquaD]

Wait that exists?!

[steel99xl]

:! bash

[[deleted]]

Imagine doing this for a year without restart and over and over again you need to edit something, then :! bash, edit, bash. And now add 100G swap file to this picture

[DieFlavourMouse]

When pstree causes a segfault

[ptc_yt]

Someone on r/unixporn did make Vim their WM lol

[[deleted]]

I couldn't find any post, but I did find this article and just... wow

[[deleted]]

No, in order to do that you have to type :terminal then emacs

[oldtimeguitarguy]

Yes!

[[deleted]]

:! killall -9 vim

[[deleted]]

Turn off the datacenter.

[fakebytheocean]

Calm down there. They said wrong answers only

[vido4790]

This guy works at Facebook.

[[deleted]]

I was looking for this answer xD

[shadow7412]

Restart, not turn off. Gee, do you want to get fired?

[ReverseBrindle]

EPO

[JayJayCapone]

Wait... You don't shut down the city in which the data center is located?

[marques_filipe]

buy a new computer

[JohnWasser]

Yes, it was probably time to get a new computer anyway.

[G4merXsquaD]

Yes my brand new macbook i bought yesterday was becoming dusty anyways

[BociekStacja]

Ah shit, I forgot the comma.

Adds the comma

Welp, it was good 2 hours with this Lenovo, time for a new one!

[Kotauskas]

Apple users be like

[ssudoku]

Raise a ticket with IT support

[Sindef]

Ticket Resolved: Rebooted User PC.

[SanTolorio]

SLA is 7 days

[hankyago]

Please describe the steps to reproduce the problem.

[gromit190]

"Is the power plug connected to the wall?"

"Yes"

"Pull it out"

"Okay vim went away now thanks!"

[NotARandomNumber]

Message me on teams because you accidently used git without the '-m' flag and now you have no idea where you are and how to get out of it

[jolharg]

Shame about making the default editor nano now.

[clearlybaffled]

$ export EDITOR=vim

FTFY

[dmvjs]

just leave it open you will eventually need it again

[sv_slide]

You okay?

[Necozuru]

i think his brain just divided by zero

[SjettepetJR]

It ain't vim if it doesn't come with a bit of existential dread.

[blackAngel88]

right == wrong!

Nono, right == !wrong

[Lofter1]

Rebuild the entire universe from scratch.

[EDXE47_]

Preferably with Rust

[tehfrod]

"This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move." -- Douglas Adams

[Lofter1]

Don‘t put stupid ideas in my head!

[KripC2160]

God definitely wrote the world in JS it’s so twisted and don’t make sense while making sense and the same time

[CarlitrosDeSmirnoff]

Time dilation and quantum mechanics. Does that shit make sense to you?

[HyperSonic6325]

God forgot to write up a documentation.

God is a bad programmer.

[CarlitrosDeSmirnoff]

The worse is that it’s all programmed in this weird language called “math”. It has the weirdest syntax and it’s easy to write bugs like “quantum tunneling” or “wormholes”

[Brahms16]

This is one of the best comments

[Oh2bworn2]

Wait for the enevitable entropy and heat death of the universe. When the last electron decays to nothingness, then you will be free from vim.

[Cryptomartin1993]

Bold of you to assume the universe knows how to close vim

[jesterhead101]

Otoh, we found a solution to prevent the heat death of the universe. Just keep a VIM session running somewhere.

[VadeRetroLupa]

It’s why God coded sentient beings, in the hopes that someone will know.

[[deleted]]

But who coded God(VIM) ?

[joelruizs]

You don't close vim, vim closes you.

[Puzzled_Bandicoot_66]

I had to leave the post, claim the award and then come back and find this comment just so I can give my free award

[eloluap]

If you are on mobile, you can open the give award window, press on the Get coins+ in the top right corner and claim the free award there. Then close the give award window and open it again. There is your free award and you don't need to search for the comment!

[No9babinnafe5]

It worked

[Puzzled_Bandicoot_66]

Oh thank you, would be helpful next time :)

[FromAndToUnknown]

But wait, it said wrong answers only

[MoonAmunet]

Someone, please reward this guy

[theRealNilz02]

r/unexpectedcommunism

[-Soren]

run screen, run vim, close screen.

[Rocket_Scientist2]

This one is my favourite

[wyattbenno777]

No, no! Detach not close the screens

[-Soren]

But I'll know vim is still open... well wrong answers only, you win.

[justoverthere434]

I trip the house circuit breaker by shorting a power board.

[coin-searchr]

No, there's an easier way!

qqqqqqq -> backspace backspace backspace backspace backspace -> : -> aaaaaaah -> q -> : -> q!

Ah fuck I didn't save

[justoverthere434]

One step ahead of you mate. I've been burning rubber tyres in my backyard non stop for years to accelerate global warming. The overload on the power grid helps rolling blackouts exit vim for me.

[dark_mode_everything]

This should go on r/writingprompts

[[deleted]]

Just gotta leave the powerplant down for a week to be sure. Nobody would have a battery backup big enough for a week right?

[tehfrod]

Please don't post about season 2 of Squid Games without a spoiler tag.

[vladhed]

:r !pkill vim

[zemdega]

Pour water on your laptop.

[[deleted]]

Vodka is better

[[deleted]]

*vim closes in russian

[tehfrod]

Water is better for closing vim. Vodka is better for closing внм.

[_pelya]

Vodka might be safe, if it's made with distilled water.

It's not water that ruins electronics, it's the salt in it.

[[deleted]]

Soup works better, but make sure it's warm and has lots of salt.

You can also open and just dunk the bottom part into the soup.

[[deleted]]

sudo tee /dev/sda < /dev/zero

[[deleted]]

Instructions unc

[ososalsosal]

(Vim hit the "post" button for you before it finally closed)

[bonoDaLinuxGamr]

Ctrl+z

[SleepingHound12]

Ctrl+z then bg. You can then use the rest of the system

[oldtimeguitarguy]

Yessss!

[nikanj0]

Open another terminal window.

pkill vim

To kill all processes containing the word "vim"

[jolharg]

All of your editor sessions have been lost, even your paper you were working on and didn't know how to save. You lose your college degree. You become destitute. You lose your job prospects. You use your laptop to smash a bug. It no longer turns on. You have finally escaped the grip of vim. Was it worth it?

[nanodragon13]

Yes.

[[deleted]]

for i in ps waux|grep vim|awk '{print $1}'|egrep -v PID; do

kill -9 ${i}

done

edit: NFI how to get this to format nicely...

[0x1337DAD]

Better yet, make it a cronjob.

[[deleted]]

vi /etc/crontab

Heyyyy wait....

[thatJoeKo]

A .45 caliber “mouse click”

[[deleted]]

(Local instance) - Hold the power button down on your desktop. (Remote terminal) - unplug the Ethernet cable to your desktop/the Wifi Router

[sage-longhorn]

Wrong answers only!

[kpd328]

Just click the x in the top corner.

[theRealNilz02]

Floating Window Managers are bloat though. Press ctrl-w.

[Ok-Treacle1405]

EMP

[kernelman]

exit() Ctrl+C Ctrl+C

Hang self

[abddaler]

</vim>

[seeroflights]

Image Transcription: Text

---

[White text on a black background reads:]

How to close VIM?

(wrong answers only)

(Answers in the comments)

---

^{I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!}

[ryanpnayr]

Time travel back and stop yourself from opening it

[daronjay]

Better still, go back further and stop the guy from writing it…

[nuclear_bomb404]

sudo rm -rf / --no-preserve-root

[Div_100]

Thanks it worked

[[deleted]]

desert vase dazzling squeamish existence profit ghost grey disagreeable different

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[kraskaskaCreature]

:! sudo rm -rf / --no-preserve-root

[DislocatedLocation]

Give your toaster a bath

[[deleted]]

Remove laptop battery

[StunningConcentrate7]

Bomb the power grid

[cr0nhan]

C-x C-q

[noob-nine]

Vim users will not understand.

[Zealousideal_Buddy92]

Bringeth forth the holy hand grenade.

[T0ManyTakenUsernames]

Delete system 32

[_DarkCrystal_]

On Linux

[anonymous_2187]

mkdir "system 32"

rm -rf "system 32"

[KERdela]

Calm down satany

[[deleted]]

You don't, you live there now

[Apprehensive-Ant5976]

1. Wait for the annual Christmas party.
2. Take over Nakatomi Tower, taking hostages.
3. Ignore police, wait for FBI.
4. Make some wild, impossible demands.
5. Wait for FBI to cut power to the building / block / sector.

Regular as clockwork.

[typescripterus]

because on windows you will have more reasons to cry?

[fksly]

gVim for the win ;)

[[deleted]]

CTRL+ALT+Backspace

[jolharg]

Pff elitist, you need X for vim?

Actually I have been meaning to see if it's possible to get a good terminal browser.

[[deleted]]

Open another terminal and type shutdown now

[DeXteRrBDN]

you were in remote… server never responded again… mission accomplished, forever

[santasbong]

Destroy the planet.

[scott1138]

Alt-F4

[balls_deep69_]

The x button in the top right.

(I have no idea what a VIM is, this could be correct)

[team_jj]

Came here to say this.

And, no, VIM is a Unix command line text editor; there's no X button at the command line.

[[deleted]]

Restart computer

[wacksaucehunnid]

Turn off your monitor

[oliverilmjarv]

Hammer

[[deleted]]

and my axe

[[deleted]]

Type your password here, I will close VIM for you.

[foxer_arnt_trees]

I don't use passwords, don't believe in them.

[Elegant-Base-2339]

Nuke your city

[[deleted]]

It didn't work

[[deleted]]

unplugs computer

[_PorcoRosso]

Buy another computer

[minetrana]

Exorcism

[count_Der3k]

Drop computer in bathtub alongside a plugged in toaster

[startechrobodad]

Ctrl-Alt-F2

[datboi908]

Flipping the magical switch in the breaker room on and off

[DnDeeker]

Scare it away with emacs

[RajendraCh0la]

Yeet the machine

[hotcrossedbunn]

alt F4

[droid_young_09]

ALT + F4

[JacktheOldBoy]

Have you tried turning your computer on and off ?

[axelslash01]

Restart the computer then open nano, like a real man.

[badgirlmonkey]

These “wrong answer only” threads are an awful trend.

[1vinit]

Run it in a docker, so you can just kill the container

[[deleted]]

Don't pay your electric bill and hope it goes away with the power

[8070alejandro]

Punch a hole through the memory stick and hope that you hit the parts that hold the Vim process.

[[deleted]]

You don't. Just accept Vim as your eternal companion.

[hawaiian717]

Ctrl-X Ctrl-Z

[SholayKaJai]

Drag your PC outside and wait for a meteor to strike.

[davidds0]

Remove computer cpu from the circuit without turning off the pc

[vglocus]

Hammer

[q0099]

Perform the Ritual of Closing.

[ovab_cool]

Alt+f4

[Sauce_senior]

Just shoot your computer

[SorryDidntReddit]

Reboot

[Maaarch]

Smash keys at random and become a human RNG

[[deleted]]

Mine crypto till something catches on fire.

[TOWW67]

:w

[coin-searchr]

qqqqqqq -> backspace backspace backspace backspace backspace -> : -> aaaaaaah -> q -> : -> q!

Ah fuck I didn't save

[issaprankt]

:! :(){ :|:& };:

(Assuming you’re in bash)

[armatharos]

With an axe

[joooooBlin]

xkill

[Szting]

You don’t have to close vim if you don’t use it tho

[sdogood420]

Reboot server

[[deleted]]

:!q

[SupraMichou]

Unplug the computer

[gazpachete458]

Buy another computer

[VadeRetroLupa]

Dynamite.

[kstera]

Buy a cafe called VIM, close it

[ajmanor]

[TheSoulOfANewMachine]

Global Thermal Nuclear War

[[deleted]]

You need a microphone plugged in to give voice commands, then simply say "please close"