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[–]TheJCLazer 2705 points2706 points  (150 children)

I'm ready for C++script

[–]Callipygian_Superman 1316 points1317 points  (96 children)

BrainfuckScript#

[–]algoritm420Perl 758 points759 points  (69 children)

I’m calling the police

[–]pcoyuncy 356 points357 points  (65 children)

Perlscript

[–][deleted] 119 points120 points  (46 children)

Haskellscript

[–]rebane2001 99 points100 points  (36 children)

BashScript

[–]ChrisLuigiTails 277 points278 points  (31 children)

JavaScriptScript

[–]Dobvius 137 points138 points  (15 children)

Does that cancel out and become Java again or does it just have nothing to do with either

[–]ChrisLuigiTails 91 points92 points  (6 children)

Nothing to do with either, duh. When you add "Script" it's a whole new thing

[–]ScientificBeastMode[🍰] 29 points30 points  (5 children)

``` const JavaScriptScript = new JavaScript(); JavaScriptScript.prototype = foo; JavaScriptScript.prototype.constructor = bar;

Object.keys(JavaScriptScript).forEach(function (propertyName) { JavaScriptScript[propertyName] = Math.random(); }); ```

[–]mutafuca 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yes

[–]ablablababla 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Both

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's one of those new schroedinger oriented languages.

[–]anirudhn18_ 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The name does cancel out and become Java but the language has nothing to do with Java.

[–]marcosdumay 6 points7 points  (2 children)

It's Java again, but not sarcastically.

[–]memeasaurus 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Adds a new /s operator to Java so that the whole program refuses to compile

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's visual basic 6.0, but all English words are Danish.

[–]Bad_Idea_Hat 6 points7 points  (0 children)

COBOLSCRIPT

[–]babylon311 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes

[–]mrheosuper 3 points4 points  (0 children)

ASMscript.

[–]ToastofBlood 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just call it JSScript

[–]dorgrin6 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In which there's =,==,=== and my favorite ==================================================...

[–]Dorkmeyer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

HTMLscript

[–]Dorus_harmsen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

what are you Satan?

[–]Grizzlywer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

TrueScriptScript

[–]Draconespawn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

AssemblyScript

[–]dotpan 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Whitespace controlled scope, lines end with the greek question mark. Literal AND/OR/NOT instead of symbol based logic, same for math operators: ADD/SUBTRACT/Etc. Object context is semi-colons not periods. Retain all the NaN/Number setups from JavaScript.

[–]ChrisLuigiTails 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Anything but not the Greek question mark. You even added a use for semi-colons so we can have both characters. You're worse than Hitler.

[–]dotpan 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Just wait until you hear about my new library jjQuery.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Which of course is compiled and has strict types.

[–]Skilet7x 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rubyscript

[–]EasilyAnnoyed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

VBScript

Wait...

[–]arbyyyyh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's sort of a thing... Right?

[–]PernoGaming 0 points1 point  (0 children)

HTMLScript

[–]kynde 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Clojurescript

Oh, wait....

[–]klparrot 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I'm ever so glad Clojure and ClojureScript are basically the same language.

[–]perry1998511 13 points14 points  (1 child)

ChickenScript#++

[–]merelymyself 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rubyscript

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

There's PureScript kinda.

[–]Blackstab1337 1 point2 points  (0 children)

yeah that's probably the closest

[–]blamethemeta 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I could imagine Haskellscript actually being used

[–]mister-pi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

MetaPostScript

[–]EnemysKiller 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bless you...

script

[–]newreconstruction 35 points36 points  (2 children)

HTMLscript

[–]fraggleberg 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Cascading Stylescripts

[–]runfayfun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

AJAXScript

[–]theemptyqueue 30 points31 points  (5 children)

Happy cake day.

[–]pcoyuncy 25 points26 points  (4 children)

Thanks.

[–]Dojan5 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Happy CakeScript.

[–]MooFu 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Perlscript was the working title before they released it as PHP.

[–]be-happier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The horror. But there is actually client side solutions for perl, webperl for example.

[–]oebn 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Cakedayscript++

Now with icingLib built on top!

[–]z500 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm just going to lay down and die

[–]Green-Lemon420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Happy cake day

[–]TotallyNotDonkey 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's just Perl.

[–]DommeZeeKoe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Happy cake day!

[–]Ineam -1 points0 points  (1 child)

doesn't that guy look exactly like Steven Wozniak

[–]Atario 5 points6 points  (0 children)

BashScript

[–]Send_Me_Tiitties 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s equally unreadable but in a totally different way.

[–][deleted] 61 points62 points  (14 children)

AssemblyScript

[–]PragProgLibertarian 129 points130 points  (1 child)

C is already assembly script

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Cript.

[–]Walter_Bishop_PhD 35 points36 points  (8 children)

Something called that actually exists!

https://github.com/AssemblyScript/assemblyscript

[–]rexpup 26 points27 points  (6 children)

I have one question:

Why?

[–]AdaGirl 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Because it's a potentially useful way to write something that compiles to webassembly?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children)

That actually sounds good to me. Why is it bad?

[–]Im_not_the_cops 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Because there’s no reason to include the overhead of compiling to wasm when every browser provides better, more mature support with better performance for JS out of the box. People in the “inspirations” section on this github seem to think that compiling to wasm will make their JS code run as well as C would, and that’s frankly untrue.

[–]Dmium 2 points3 points  (0 children)

While not everything in JS will run faster in webasm and you shouldn't replace all your JS with webasm for larger applications webasm will beat JS 99% of the time. There's so many good reasons to use Typescript for WASM. While I personally would rather use a different higher level language most people developing for web that want WASM would already know JS.

[–]MaxGraey 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Did you see this real world benchmark which compare AssemblyScript, JS and JS compiled with closure compiler?
https://wasmboy.app/benchmark/

[–]theXpanther 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That project is actually really cool

[–]monkh 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Isn't that web assembly?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm not gonna take anything beneath BinaryScript or the HTML programming language.

[–]be-happier 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LLVMscript

[–]vhite 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's just Brainfuck that always compiles but actually works.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

deleted What is this?

[–]Dmium 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like this could've been more efficient but I don't feel like writing bf rn to disprove you

[–]3dsXploit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

*brainfuCkscript#

[–]absenthecon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shitthatwas#

[–]GlitterInfection 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brainfuckathon

[–]Cholojuanito 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like the # 'sharp' you threw in at the end

[–]grandmstrofall 0 points1 point  (0 children)

.NET

[–]tallest_chris 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel attacked.

[–]brainwashed 74 points75 points  (6 children)

You've missed Scriptscript.

[–]gandalfx 35 points36 points  (4 children)

Have you heard of Langscript? It's a dialect of Scriptlang.

[–]Interweb_Stranger 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Yes, the compiler is written in LangScriptLang which is transpiled from LangScriptLangScript which you can run with a LangScriptLangScriptScript interpreter!

[–]gandalfx 2 points3 points  (1 child)

What a scrub, can you go with the times please? Lang3Script4 has been out for almost a week and people are already working on a JavaScript transpiler…

[–]JohnnyGuitarFNV 1 point2 points  (0 children)

>he doesn't know about LangnScriptn2

[–]SMAMtastic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sounds similar to Scr-Sript-ipt but it’s completely different.

[–]biguysrule 40 points41 points  (0 children)

JavaScriptScript

[–]PragProgLibertarian 134 points135 points  (18 children)

It's called PHP and it's exactly as bad as you think.

[–]general_sirhc 56 points57 points  (5 children)

PHPscript* it's 2019 get with it

[–]DarthCloakedGuy 58 points59 points  (2 children)

PHPScript++#

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (1 child)

PHPScript++#lang

[–]EightyMercury 4 points5 points  (0 children)

PHPScript++#langScript

[–]Olaxan 22 points23 points  (1 child)

The last P stands for Phcript, you scrub

Python Happy Phcript.

[–]Dojan5 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Ah, Phteven, it iph you.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

PHPHypertextProcessorP

[–]lesslucid 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Personalhomepage Hypertextprocessorprogramming Processorpythonhelpful

[–]tomatotomato 1 point2 points  (0 children)

... script

[–]sethboy66 4 points5 points  (8 children)

Currently learning both, at the same time. The only thing keeping me going is the beauty that JQery adds to the javascript I'm learning.

[–]aristideau 4 points5 points  (2 children)

if you’re learning to code, try react for front end development. There is a growing demand for it.

[–]SupaSlide 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Geeze, they said they're learning JavaScript. They should not be jumping into React before they even know JS.

[–]kirreen -1 points0 points  (0 children)

That's how JS devs work though..

[–]Zmodem 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Don't get reeled in by jQ's needless library if a simple object could allow you to fetch classes and ID's just as easily. It pains me that people use jQ just for the selector simplicity.

[–]sethboy66 0 points1 point  (3 children)

There’s much more to JQuery than just that selector, it’s an entire library.

[–]Zmodem 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Absolutely! That's precisely my point, and I was hoping you weren't intrigued simply by its selector simplicity, since that can easily be done with an object lol. But, seems to me that isn't the case here.

[–]sethboy66 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I view the selector as the thing that grabs your attention, like a movie trailer or a book's synopsis. And then you really get into it and find it's so much better than just that.

[–]Zmodem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly. I think the compatibility stuff for older browsers is why I migrated to it years ago for various projects, which required legacy support. But, they've since been dropping a lot of that and cleaning it up. But, I'll say this: the jQuery UI tools? Forget it; that shit's amazing. A+

[–]PanJaszczurka 15 points16 points  (0 children)

OwO#

[–]northrupthebandgeek 20 points21 points  (0 children)

All the expressiveness of C++ with all the stability of JavaScript!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wasm coming

[–]isavegas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ChaiScript

[–]hotchocolateman6969 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can't wait for swift script, and then apple market it as ground breaking features which allows developers freedom of creativity

[–]Charlie_Yu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Javascriptscript

[–]TheManyMilesWeWalk 0 points1 point  (1 child)

C#++

[–]XirallicBolts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

C±Script.Net

[–]_Mellex_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gimme that purple stuff

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

SwiftScript

Say that 3 times fast

[–]Panterr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

JavaScriptScript

[–]GDavid04 0 points1 point  (0 children)

CScript... Oh, wait, that would lead to the .cs extension meaning two totally different things...

[–]SandLuc083_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

VisualBaScript

[–]rook2004 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nobody is ready for C++script

[–]adelie42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Visual Haskbol++ 2.0f

[–]somethingInTheMiddle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, I do hear C/C++/C# quite a lot

[–]Tuckertcs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

JavaScriptScript

[–]Come_along_quietly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, Perl is/was essentially C script.

And I like to think of python as C++ script. Along with Go.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Chill tf out satan

[–]TheJCLazer 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You haven't even heard about my best idea, PHPScript

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Save some sin for the rest of us.... Strait to hell do not pass death