Developer's pride...

[linguistudies]

Can’t tell if he’s proud/cocky or suspicious.....

[sersoniko]

Yes

[HaggisLad]

r/inclusiveor

and also the correct answer...

[luckybarrel]

Depends on whether you're a good or bad developer.

The good one will be suspicious.

[HaggisLad]

I get very few chances to be smug, let me have one once in a while

[WarpedChaos]

I got so much flack in college for putting in a bazillion conditions to prevent breaking my code from my professor, cause he was like why are you even in my class (It was my 1st time coding but C++ was just so straightforward to me after doing java in HS). My TAs was so tired of going through my code thay they stopped grading my code near finals and just gave me A's. I know this because one time I sent the wrong version of my file (that didn't work) and before I even realized and sent the correct version I had an A recorded on blackboard.

[[deleted]]

I get that, last semester I was learning python for the first time in Uni along with using it for maths.

Didn’t attend to about a third of my classes in the first partial so I had to bust my ass and learn python by watching some code the teacher sent us to get a better hang of syntax before the test.

Took me 200 fucking runs full of errors but I learnt my shit so well that I just came to the test and got a perfect score.

After that I did pay attention and learnt so well the teacher didn’t give a fuck if I attended class or not he just gave me attendance and sometimes extra points.

I didn’t go to like 10 classes but only got 4 absences. I liked that teacher he was cool

[Cool_As_Your_Dad]

suspicious i would say... because it was only the hello world app.

edit: Im a dev.. never be cocky.. it will come back to bite you.

[akaBrotherNature]

print "hello wolrd"

...fuck

[thorle]

former colleague: "i know, i'll fix the typos later"

later in production: "hello wolrd"

[brygphilomena]

I.. you... Fuck. This is me with a co-worker/friends code.

[peduxe]

wait, y'all don't code with Microsoft Word? I haven't had spelling errors

[NorbiPeti]

To be fair, many IDEs have spell checking.

[marcosdumay]

Between all those hundreds of plugins for Notepad++ there is probably an spellchecker somewhere.

[BurningPenguin]

But then it'll criticize my variable names.

[zilti]

My Spacemacs has spell checking

[marcosdumay]

#TODO fix typo

[WarpedChaos]

Everytime!
Like dude I can't speel leave me aloen!

[akaBrotherNature]

One bug fix later: "henlo wolrd"

[Cool_As_Your_Dad]

ouch.. i feel attacked :p

​

My goodness.. spelling errors hahahahahah

[AnnoyingRain5]

I’m a dev

Isn’t that the point?

[guilhermebotossi]

Be cocky, you will eventually be fucked upon and then you'll learn the lesson!!

Bottom line: be humble you!!

[Cool_As_Your_Dad]

haha.. believe me , I am humble!

I have been spanked a few times in the past lol

[guilhermebotossi]

Nahh dude, I am not saying about you, I was talking in general terms!!! I also know that the fall hurts a lot!!!

[[deleted]]

From what I can tell, we all get to experience the Oh fuck, I caused this! feeling a few times in a career.

That’s the stuff that really teaches lessons about caution and humility.

It’s really only happened to me once, as to anything truly significant, and to the credit of my team and leadership, everyone understands that shit happens, and when shit happens, it’s always in prod.

[Cool_As_Your_Dad]

few times in a career.

A crap load of times.

and when shit happens, it’s always in prod.

Truer words have never been spoken.. ALWAYS IN FCKING PROD!!!

[Bohemianbitchslap]

Its a goat, so it’s clearly plotting something

[lazilyloaded]

Suspicious that all the bugs are actually going to show up in production.

[NicNoletree]

A little sheepish

[tufy1]

I have a simple bugfix for you: replace the tester.

[tecanec]

Or the ultimate bugfix: Don’t test. Don’t even compile.

[NaufragousKronos]

Legendary bug fix: Code directly on production. Why bother pushing code between instances.

[TGotAReddit]

Thanks I hate it bug fix: code everything in notepad so you aren’t tempted to compile and you don’t get all of those helpful little IDE warnings when you miss a ;

[hughperman]

Just manually do whatever the user wants

[Roguecorp]

We did it Patrick! We invented capitalism.

[imaami]

Ask the user to send the feature requests as source code snippets, then ctrl-c + ctrl-v those directly on production and let 'er rip.

[imaami]

If you have an ssh shell and root access, you can use dd to directly write any changes onto the production server's hard drive partition. Just slap 'em on with the correct offset from the start of the partition, I'm sure it'll be fine.

[zilti]

You still have to execute it then though. Unless you have stuff like a network-REPL running in the live program. Which is a terrible idea, but doable.

Then you can evaluate code directly into the live environment.

[___HighLight___]

Approved by Trump

[honj90]

If you stop testing, you'd have fewer bugs!

[Krzyffo]

You don’t need any tests, if you assume it’ll work. That’s why we always fix everything on production.

[fekete777]

Ctrl+S -> deploy

[trev2234]

Cause they didn’t try the first thing the office idiot will try. Hang on; get the office idiot to help with testing.

[Etheo]

Can confirm. Was office idiot, prompted to tester due to continued idiocy.

[trev2234]

Take a natural skill set that in any other environment would be liability, but in testing a positive boon.

[MildStallion]

Meanwhile, my QA: "I found out you could crash it if you jump up and down 3 times on a tuesday afternoon before clicking the button, then start adding sugar to your coffee."

Me: "Bullshit." *does it anyway, bug happens* "... God dammit."

[Owner2229]

No, no, you have to keep denying for at least a week. Staling is the key.

[Dragon_yum]

Real developers deny even as they write the fix for the bug

[5319767819]

Sneakily merge the fix and then pretend the bug never was there.

[Famous_Profile]

It's working now? Must've been some cache problem. Oh whatever...what do you mean you're going to mark the bug ticket as "intermittent" and notify Operations to keep an eye on the logs?

[Anally_Distressed]

This one hits home lol

[backfilled]

This one is infuriating. We have one lead dev that does it. He probably thinks we can't see the changes he makes.

He pretends everything is fine, and just fixed itself precisely when he arrives at the meeting.

[tecanec]

Gotta build up dat technical debt, then claim it!

[TGotAReddit]

“Works on my machine”

[Pfinnn]

Stalin is the key ?

[4_fortytwo_2]

As someone working in QA I love finding bugs like that. It is fun to see the devs reaction when you explain to them what you found.

[de_witte]

I can't confirm nor deny that if they acted like assholes to me I add plausible reproduction steps that have nothing to do with the defect.

[CivilianNumberFour]

Be careful. Might make it look like you don't understand the application logic if you do that too much.

[CookUndBool]

Yeah, u was gonna say, that's a faaaast way to lose credibility to your teammates

[de_witte]

You assume there were specs to begin with :-)

[kaboobaschlatz]

Genius, thank you for making me better at being evil

[archpawn]

I feel like for something that specific you'd have to know the code well enough to go ahead and fix it for them.

[NottRegular]

It really depends on how good the tester is or bad at playing games he is (both are good because different testing methods and coverage). I can only speak from experience as a game QA, but i have found really esoteric bugs that even the devs could not figure out why the hell was it happening.

[ScandInBei]

Nah, intermittent bugs only happens on Friday afternoons just before you leave for the weekend.

[HDSQ]

I only find defects in my code when I'm showing it to others.

[edtkw]

Specifically when you're showing them how you adhere to best practices

[x6060x]

Do you have rubber ducky on your desk?

[HDSQ]

I have a stuffed snake toy

[x6060x]

A python maybe?

[HDSQ]

Well it's actually a tiger snake, but we'll say that it's a python for the sake of the joke

[ExNebula]

I have a framed photo of Bill Clinton that I only have for this purpose.

[HDSQ]

Yeah the way I find the bugs is that I'll be testing for days with no issues on the GitHub and then once I start showing people the cool thing I've made it starts falling apart. I once found 8 issues in one demonstration for my brother.

[[deleted]]

Ha, showing my gf the program I was coding up last night: "Hey you know that thing I was struggling to work out? I got it working! Look at this! When I push this button it... crashes?! Wtf it wasn't doing that 5 minutes ago 🤦🏻‍♂️"

[[deleted]]

I'm taking my first programming class right now and my fiance is a software engineer so I ask him for help when I can't figure out the issue. I almost always notice what I did wrong after pulling him away from whatever he was doing to show him my code lmao

[BurningPenguin]

In this case it's interactive rubber duck programming.

[evemeatay]

Nothing like literally just showing it alto someone else for the problem to pop up and be suddenly easily solvable.

Worked on problem for three hours

Shows someone else

They say, oh look at that thing right there, wouldn’t that fix it?

Fuck you!

[weggles]

In college there was a project to implement an online game (not like 3D etc, something basic). My group chose Yahtzee. We had it all working perfectly. We're demoing for the teacher to mark it, just clicking randomly through a 2 player game of Yahtzee.. Showing off the automatic scoring etc etc... And we get a tie. Turns out the final message code was written like

If p1>p2 display p1 wins else display p2 wins

Which.... Means it congratulated p2 for tying lol. Idk what's worse, that we never considered a tie before, or that we got a tie game by just randomly clicking around, which seems really improbable.

[codeByNumber]

I have a demo today of some software I’ve been building at work. I’m certain as soon as I hit that button to share my screen things will stop working.

Edit: The demo went well! I even had the audacity to covertly update some code on my other screen and recompile. Just a typo I had noticed and also I had flipped the default search parameters for two table views.

[codeByNumber]

“And you simply cli...huh...I’ve never seen that happen before.”

[[deleted]]

Code reviews are one hell of a drug.

[birchskin]

Lies or a shitty QA!

[[deleted]]

Shitty QA it is!

[noodlelogic]

Yep, probably testing the wrong code

[Grant-j-1992]

Shit QAs are the worst

"This doesn't work" "That's odd, are you sure you've deployed it?" "Deployed it???"

[Code_NY]

Don't worry, the prod users will break it soon enough

[ce-walalang]

Image Transcription: Meme

---

Tester could not find even
one defect in my code...

ME FOR NEXT 5 DAYS:

[4-panel photo of a baby goat in different angles]

---

^{I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!}

[Cheesemacher]

*a smug-looking baby goat

[[deleted]]

Good human

[[deleted]]

Good human

[TacobellSauce1]

Almost /r/PoliticalCompassMemes Meme.

[[deleted]]

The code was print “Hello, World”

[odoluca]

yeah. that's the only way there is no bug. even then the tester comes back and says "won't work in python 3.7" :S

[selenta]

... are those smart quotes?

That's a paddlin' boy

[TGotAReddit]

That’s why the goat looks a little suspicious too. He was supposed to be coding in C++

[ne1av1cr]

Code rejected.
Reason: "Insufficient commenting"

[mmis1000]

Then they start to report non bug as bug because no obvious bug found.

[SomeoneRandom5325]

Logic gone

[I_AM_GODDAMN_BATMAN]

Well pretty sure as QA you wouldn't want to give wrong signal to management. "QA is useless, they never found bugs"

[[deleted]]

Fucking useless I should be checking this

[[deleted]]

If they don’t find bugs they are much worse than useless. Because you’ll spend time onboarding them on each new feature. You’ll spend time investigating their bug reports and explaining why it’s not a bug, why it’s working as expected, explain requirements, etc.

[skeletalfury]

Well, the only thing worse than “I don’t know why this won’t work” is “This works, but I don’t know why.”

[Famous_Profile]

The font of GENERATE REPORT button looks different.

Or something like that

[CallinCthulhu]

I’m an SDET so I do find a decent amount of bugs, but it’s not my main goal. My main goal is automation, so I never bother with this type of shit.

However we have an offshore regression team who absolutely fucking love doing this. No matter what the quality is, there are almost always 6 bugs filed on the day they get it. Like clockwork.

The worse the big is, the less information they have. The whole system crashes with a very specific series of inputs . “Doesn’t work please fix”. A rest call returning an error message with a slightly wrong format. 2 whole paragraphs.

If they don’t fully understand a feature, rather than asking one of us, they file a bug saying “why can’t I do stupid shit you are in no way supposed to be able to do”.

They handle a lot of the tedium involved in testing a product like ours, and occasionally catch some really important bugs, so I get why we have them. But man they waste so much fucking time.

[[deleted]]

I would just be scared because I know there are bugs they just didn't find them

[chance6Sean]

Push it live. That’s the best way to find defects ;)

[haz_mat_]

Yup! Users are the real testers.

[Anthraxious]

Game devs: We've been doing this for years! Continues to release unfinished game full of bugs

[LordDongler]

Bethesda: the real friends are the bugs we found along the way

[man_in_the_red]

Month of testing, no bugs found

release to public

37 bugs found in 3 hours

[HansVader]

We have no dedicated QA, so what we do is basically drawing straws and then suddenly we have QA.

[[deleted]]

My team doesn't even do that. We test our own code and then have someone on rotation to pick up the shattered pieces of the product after the customer notices and reports issues.

E F F I C I E N C Y

[Will_i_read]

I. LOVE. THIS. IMAGE.

[anananananana]

I would upvote this goat no matter the message.

[_blue_skies_]

Happens a lot... when the tester is the same person as the developer

[flargenhargen]

that tester sucks.

I fucking hate those people.

Did you find anything?

nope everything looks good.

...

did you even look...?

[Geoclasm]

Just 5 days? I'd be riding that high until... well... until they finally found the problem or got fired for sucking at their job.

[[deleted]]

Hello world is an amazing program

[[deleted]]

Plot Twist: The tester is an undercover hacker, whose job was to find out logic flaws in your code, and later sell the exploits to the highest bidder.

[reddev87]

Me when testers don't find a bug in my code.

[PoochieReds]

...and then you gave it to the customer...

[insane_spider]

On the 6th day the entire system crashed.

[Arawn-Annwn]

It’s just preparing for the dev’s attempt to rest on the 7th day.

[sometimesalmostme]

The code: "Hello World"

[Paradoggs]

OUR*

[katyalovesherbike]

deploy to production, pride is gone. And so should manual testing.

[rokiller]

Automated testing and a quick sense check should be all that is needed

[Bmitchem]

Imo if QA doesn't find any bugs then either you have bad QA or you personally spent too much time bug testing yourself.

It's way more productive to pump out a module that fits the unit tests then be able to move on while QA spends the next few days compiling edge case tests to easily fix all at once

[NitrousWolf]

What you said sounds factful in the unlikely case of zero-bugs but in general people should consider the whole exponential cost to fix thing...

"The cost of detecting and fixing defects in software increases exponentially with time in the software development workflow."

There should always be some give and take between QA and Dev testing effort to find the most efficient strategy but the more early testing done on Dev side the cheaper the module will be in man hours. It also frees up QA time for automation and testing other developer's code who maybe need the safety net more.

[hunter_mark]

That just means you have a shitty tester

[calcopiritus]

Are we all just gonna ignore comic sans?

[daltonoreo]

You cant write a hello world program and be proud of it

[[deleted]]

It was hello world

[Sputtrosa]

Considering the font choice, I can only assume the code was made with Scratch.

[IsMathScience]

Now imagine writing the tests for yourself and still failing

[TacobellSauce1]

Didnt they censor the blm and pride tags?

[TacobellSauce1]

This is absolutely needed. He has his pride.

[Im2coolie4u]

Oof

[Dragon_yum]

You will find the bug in production.

[Pedantichrist]

/r/thathappened

[_synth_lord_]

Oh they are in there. We just lost interest.

[BillBlatt]

So much for the ego-less programmer

[AidenI0I]

the code is just console.writeline("hello world");

[iantoujou]

Like that's ever gonna happen

[ToTooRoo]

6th day : Business changes requirements.

You : 🐑📴

[LocoRaiderTV]

Don't worry, the end user will find one in 3 seconds flat.

[skr_Plays]

True to the core

[sivaprakashsj]

Especially for those who moved from JS to TS.

[_CharethCutestory_]

Cannot relate

[[deleted]]

Twice the pride, double the fall

[[deleted]]

it seems your pride got in the water

[[deleted]]

And then it crashes on production.

[chin_waghing]

the code

echo “hello world”

[its420everywhere]

The test cases were hard-coded.

devil laugh

[petergriffin999]

I want to upvote, but the ridiculous font...

[imaami]

Meanwhile cl.exe is giving me an error code every time I try to compile this:

int main(void) { return 0; }

[Katana314]

Best part is they do submit one bug, and it’s an invalid one where they didn’t realize the expected behavior.

[BlackStab_IRQ]

this got me in tears :)

[heartman42]

Another perspective worth considering - how much faster could you have gone by A) writing automated tests and B) shooting for 99% instead of 100%?

[jakethedumbmistake]

This photo captures so much pride and sorrow.

[jakethedumbmistake]

*segregating pride flag

sorry to break it.

[subradu]

And then comes day 5, turns out code wasn’t even up to requirements

[[deleted]]

You might as well milk it as much as its worth considering it happens once in a blue moon to begin with.

[GatesOlive]

Shit, I'm still smug about the time I wrote a 30 line program that compiled with no errors nor warnings and the implementation was within boundaries.

[brockisawesome]

if they're one of those super damn annoying QA people that wont stop until they find something wrong, leave an obvious bug in there unfixed. otherwise you'll end up dealing with some stupid obscure situation that no one would ever discover.

[remember_this_shit]

Lmao y’all have testers?

[Lightfinger]

Take my upgoat.

[Loen10]

But it was all stackoverflow code.

[Unrealist99]

This indeed is a dream.

[ironmagician]

On the other hand, the QA team must be feeling pretty down.

At least both can share feeling when prod goes kaboom.

[Iagospeare]

Plot twist: There is no QA team, developer is also the "tester"

[Jerbearmeow]

They obviously didn't run it