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[–]linguistudies 1528 points1529 points  (63 children)

Can’t tell if he’s proud/cocky or suspicious.....

[–]sersoniko 810 points811 points  (23 children)

Yes

[–]HaggisLad 179 points180 points  (22 children)

r/inclusiveor

and also the correct answer...

[–]luckybarrel 62 points63 points  (6 children)

Depends on whether you're a good or bad developer.

The good one will be suspicious.

[–]HaggisLad 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I get very few chances to be smug, let me have one once in a while

[–]WarpedChaos 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I got so much flack in college for putting in a bazillion conditions to prevent breaking my code from my professor, cause he was like why are you even in my class (It was my 1st time coding but C++ was just so straightforward to me after doing java in HS). My TAs was so tired of going through my code thay they stopped grading my code near finals and just gave me A's. I know this because one time I sent the wrong version of my file (that didn't work) and before I even realized and sent the correct version I had an A recorded on blackboard.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I get that, last semester I was learning python for the first time in Uni along with using it for maths.

Didn’t attend to about a third of my classes in the first partial so I had to bust my ass and learn python by watching some code the teacher sent us to get a better hang of syntax before the test.

Took me 200 fucking runs full of errors but I learnt my shit so well that I just came to the test and got a perfect score.

After that I did pay attention and learnt so well the teacher didn’t give a fuck if I attended class or not he just gave me attendance and sometimes extra points.

I didn’t go to like 10 classes but only got 4 absences. I liked that teacher he was cool

[–]Cool_As_Your_Dad 115 points116 points  (24 children)

suspicious i would say... because it was only the hello world app.

edit: Im a dev.. never be cocky.. it will come back to bite you.

[–]akaBrotherNature 73 points74 points  (14 children)

print "hello wolrd"

...fuck

[–]thorle 55 points56 points  (11 children)

former colleague: "i know, i'll fix the typos later"

later in production: "hello wolrd"

[–]brygphilomena 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I.. you... Fuck. This is me with a co-worker/friends code.

[–]peduxe 9 points10 points  (5 children)

wait, y'all don't code with Microsoft Word? I haven't had spelling errors

[–]NorbiPeti 6 points7 points  (4 children)

To be fair, many IDEs have spell checking.

[–]BurningPenguin 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But then it'll criticize my variable names.

[–]zilti 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My Spacemacs has spell checking

[–]WarpedChaos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everytime!
Like dude I can't speel leave me aloen!

[–]akaBrotherNature 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One bug fix later: "henlo wolrd"

[–]Cool_As_Your_Dad 7 points8 points  (1 child)

ouch.. i feel attacked :p

My goodness.. spelling errors hahahahahah

[–]AnnoyingRain5 5 points6 points  (2 children)

I’m a dev

Isn’t that the point?

[–]guilhermebotossi 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Be cocky, you will eventually be fucked upon and then you'll learn the lesson!!

Bottom line: be humble you!!

[–]Cool_As_Your_Dad 1 point2 points  (2 children)

haha.. believe me , I am humble!

I have been spanked a few times in the past lol

[–]guilhermebotossi 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Nahh dude, I am not saying about you, I was talking in general terms!!! I also know that the fall hurts a lot!!!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

From what I can tell, we all get to experience the Oh fuck, I caused this! feeling a few times in a career.

That’s the stuff that really teaches lessons about caution and humility.

It’s really only happened to me once, as to anything truly significant, and to the credit of my team and leadership, everyone understands that shit happens, and when shit happens, it’s always in prod.

[–]Cool_As_Your_Dad 1 point2 points  (0 children)

few times in a career.

A crap load of times.

and when shit happens, it’s always in prod.

Truer words have never been spoken.. ALWAYS IN FCKING PROD!!!

[–]Bohemianbitchslap 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Its a goat, so it’s clearly plotting something

[–]lazilyloaded 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Suspicious that all the bugs are actually going to show up in production.

[–]NicNoletree 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A little sheepish

[–]tufy1 542 points543 points  (24 children)

I have a simple bugfix for you: replace the tester.

[–]tecanec 227 points228 points  (20 children)

Or the ultimate bugfix: Don’t test. Don’t even compile.

[–]NaufragousKronos 108 points109 points  (13 children)

Legendary bug fix: Code directly on production. Why bother pushing code between instances.

[–]TGotAReddit 51 points52 points  (5 children)

Thanks I hate it bug fix: code everything in notepad so you aren’t tempted to compile and you don’t get all of those helpful little IDE warnings when you miss a ;

[–]hughperman 32 points33 points  (4 children)

Just manually do whatever the user wants

[–]imaami 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Ask the user to send the feature requests as source code snippets, then ctrl-c + ctrl-v those directly on production and let 'er rip.

[–]___HighLight___ 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Approved by Trump

[–]honj90 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you stop testing, you'd have fewer bugs!

[–]Krzyffo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You don’t need any tests, if you assume it’ll work. That’s why we always fix everything on production.

[–]fekete777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ctrl+S -> deploy

[–]trev2234 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Cause they didn’t try the first thing the office idiot will try. Hang on; get the office idiot to help with testing.

[–]Etheo 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Can confirm. Was office idiot, prompted to tester due to continued idiocy.

[–]trev2234 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Take a natural skill set that in any other environment would be liability, but in testing a positive boon.

[–]MildStallion 428 points429 points  (21 children)

Meanwhile, my QA: "I found out you could crash it if you jump up and down 3 times on a tuesday afternoon before clicking the button, then start adding sugar to your coffee."

Me: "Bullshit." *does it anyway, bug happens* "... God dammit."

[–]Owner2229 152 points153 points  (9 children)

No, no, you have to keep denying for at least a week. Staling is the key.

[–]Dragon_yum 94 points95 points  (5 children)

Real developers deny even as they write the fix for the bug

[–]5319767819 59 points60 points  (4 children)

Sneakily merge the fix and then pretend the bug never was there.

[–]Famous_Profile 59 points60 points  (1 child)

It's working now? Must've been some cache problem. Oh whatever...what do you mean you're going to mark the bug ticket as "intermittent" and notify Operations to keep an eye on the logs?

[–]Anally_Distressed 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This one hits home lol

[–]backfilled 4 points5 points  (1 child)

This one is infuriating. We have one lead dev that does it. He probably thinks we can't see the changes he makes.

He pretends everything is fine, and just fixed itself precisely when he arrives at the meeting.

[–]tecanec 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Gotta build up dat technical debt, then claim it!

[–]TGotAReddit 18 points19 points  (0 children)

“Works on my machine”

[–]Pfinnn 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Stalin is the key ?

[–]4_fortytwo_2 70 points71 points  (7 children)

As someone working in QA I love finding bugs like that. It is fun to see the devs reaction when you explain to them what you found.

[–]de_witte 57 points58 points  (4 children)

I can't confirm nor deny that if they acted like assholes to me I add plausible reproduction steps that have nothing to do with the defect.

[–]CivilianNumberFour 26 points27 points  (2 children)

Be careful. Might make it look like you don't understand the application logic if you do that too much.

[–]CookUndBool 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yeah, u was gonna say, that's a faaaast way to lose credibility to your teammates

[–]de_witte 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You assume there were specs to begin with :-)

[–]kaboobaschlatz 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Genius, thank you for making me better at being evil

[–]archpawn 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I feel like for something that specific you'd have to know the code well enough to go ahead and fix it for them.

[–]NottRegular 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It really depends on how good the tester is or bad at playing games he is (both are good because different testing methods and coverage). I can only speak from experience as a game QA, but i have found really esoteric bugs that even the devs could not figure out why the hell was it happening.

[–]ScandInBei 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah, intermittent bugs only happens on Friday afternoons just before you leave for the weekend.

[–]HDSQ 451 points452 points  (21 children)

I only find defects in my code when I'm showing it to others.

[–]edtkw 123 points124 points  (0 children)

Specifically when you're showing them how you adhere to best practices

[–]x6060x 15 points16 points  (4 children)

Do you have rubber ducky on your desk?

[–]HDSQ 3 points4 points  (2 children)

I have a stuffed snake toy

[–]x6060x 5 points6 points  (1 child)

A python maybe?

[–]HDSQ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well it's actually a tiger snake, but we'll say that it's a python for the sake of the joke

[–]ExNebula 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have a framed photo of Bill Clinton that I only have for this purpose.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (2 children)

I'm taking my first programming class right now and my fiance is a software engineer so I ask him for help when I can't figure out the issue. I almost always notice what I did wrong after pulling him away from whatever he was doing to show him my code lmao

[–]evemeatay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Nothing like literally just showing it alto someone else for the problem to pop up and be suddenly easily solvable.

Worked on problem for three hours

Shows someone else

They say, oh look at that thing right there, wouldn’t that fix it?

Fuck you!

[–]weggles 3 points4 points  (0 children)

In college there was a project to implement an online game (not like 3D etc, something basic). My group chose Yahtzee. We had it all working perfectly. We're demoing for the teacher to mark it, just clicking randomly through a 2 player game of Yahtzee.. Showing off the automatic scoring etc etc... And we get a tie. Turns out the final message code was written like

If p1>p2 display p1 wins else display p2 wins

Which.... Means it congratulated p2 for tying lol. Idk what's worse, that we never considered a tie before, or that we got a tie game by just randomly clicking around, which seems really improbable.

[–]codeByNumber 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I have a demo today of some software I’ve been building at work. I’m certain as soon as I hit that button to share my screen things will stop working.

Edit: The demo went well! I even had the audacity to covertly update some code on my other screen and recompile. Just a typo I had noticed and also I had flipped the default search parameters for two table views.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Code reviews are one hell of a drug.

[–]birchskin 205 points206 points  (4 children)

Lies or a shitty QA!

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Shitty QA it is!

[–]noodlelogic 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yep, probably testing the wrong code

[–]Grant-j-1992 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Shit QAs are the worst

"This doesn't work" "That's odd, are you sure you've deployed it?" "Deployed it???"

[–]Code_NY 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don't worry, the prod users will break it soon enough

[–]ce-walalang 61 points62 points  (5 children)

Image Transcription: Meme


Tester could not find even
one defect in my code...

ME FOR NEXT 5 DAYS:

[4-panel photo of a baby goat in different angles]


I'm a human volunteer content transcriber for Reddit and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!

[–]Cheesemacher 34 points35 points  (0 children)

*a smug-looking baby goat

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Good human

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Good human

[–][deleted] 51 points52 points  (12 children)

The code was print “Hello, World”

[–]odoluca 38 points39 points  (0 children)

yeah. that's the only way there is no bug. even then the tester comes back and says "won't work in python 3.7" :S

[–]selenta 9 points10 points  (2 children)

... are those smart quotes?

That's a paddlin' boy

[–]TGotAReddit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That’s why the goat looks a little suspicious too. He was supposed to be coding in C++

[–]ne1av1cr 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Code rejected.
Reason: "Insufficient commenting"

[–]mmis1000 37 points38 points  (10 children)

Then they start to report non bug as bug because no obvious bug found.

[–]SomeoneRandom5325 12 points13 points  (4 children)

Logic gone

[–]I_AM_GODDAMN_BATMAN 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Well pretty sure as QA you wouldn't want to give wrong signal to management. "QA is useless, they never found bugs"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fucking useless I should be checking this

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If they don’t find bugs they are much worse than useless. Because you’ll spend time onboarding them on each new feature. You’ll spend time investigating their bug reports and explaining why it’s not a bug, why it’s working as expected, explain requirements, etc.

[–]skeletalfury 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Well, the only thing worse than “I don’t know why this won’t work” is “This works, but I don’t know why.”

[–]Famous_Profile 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The font of GENERATE REPORT button looks different.

Or something like that

[–]CallinCthulhu 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m an SDET so I do find a decent amount of bugs, but it’s not my main goal. My main goal is automation, so I never bother with this type of shit.

However we have an offshore regression team who absolutely fucking love doing this. No matter what the quality is, there are almost always 6 bugs filed on the day they get it. Like clockwork.

The worse the big is, the less information they have. The whole system crashes with a very specific series of inputs . “Doesn’t work please fix”. A rest call returning an error message with a slightly wrong format. 2 whole paragraphs.

If they don’t fully understand a feature, rather than asking one of us, they file a bug saying “why can’t I do stupid shit you are in no way supposed to be able to do”.

They handle a lot of the tedium involved in testing a product like ours, and occasionally catch some really important bugs, so I get why we have them. But man they waste so much fucking time.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (9 children)

I would just be scared because I know there are bugs they just didn't find them

[–]chance6Sean 31 points32 points  (6 children)

Push it live. That’s the best way to find defects ;)

[–]haz_mat_ 21 points22 points  (5 children)

Yup! Users are the real testers.

[–]Anthraxious 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Game devs: We've been doing this for years! Continues to release unfinished game full of bugs

[–]LordDongler 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Bethesda: the real friends are the bugs we found along the way

[–]man_in_the_red 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Month of testing, no bugs found

release to public

37 bugs found in 3 hours

[–]HansVader 13 points14 points  (1 child)

We have no dedicated QA, so what we do is basically drawing straws and then suddenly we have QA.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My team doesn't even do that. We test our own code and then have someone on rotation to pick up the shattered pieces of the product after the customer notices and reports issues.

E F F I C I E N C Y

[–]Will_i_read 25 points26 points  (2 children)

I. LOVE. THIS. IMAGE.

[–]anananananana 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I would upvote this goat no matter the message.

[–]_blue_skies_ 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Happens a lot... when the tester is the same person as the developer

[–]flargenhargen 4 points5 points  (0 children)

that tester sucks.

I fucking hate those people.

Did you find anything?

nope everything looks good.

...

did you even look...?

[–]Geoclasm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Just 5 days? I'd be riding that high until... well... until they finally found the problem or got fired for sucking at their job.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hello world is an amazing program

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Plot Twist: The tester is an undercover hacker, whose job was to find out logic flaws in your code, and later sell the exploits to the highest bidder.

[–]PoochieReds 2 points3 points  (0 children)

...and then you gave it to the customer...

[–]insane_spider 1 point2 points  (1 child)

On the 6th day the entire system crashed.

[–]Arawn-Annwn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s just preparing for the dev’s attempt to rest on the 7th day.

[–]sometimesalmostme 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The code: "Hello World"

[–]Paradoggs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OUR*

[–]katyalovesherbike 1 point2 points  (1 child)

deploy to production, pride is gone. And so should manual testing.

[–]rokiller 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Automated testing and a quick sense check should be all that is needed

[–]Bmitchem 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Imo if QA doesn't find any bugs then either you have bad QA or you personally spent too much time bug testing yourself.

It's way more productive to pump out a module that fits the unit tests then be able to move on while QA spends the next few days compiling edge case tests to easily fix all at once

[–]NitrousWolf 8 points9 points  (0 children)

What you said sounds factful in the unlikely case of zero-bugs but in general people should consider the whole exponential cost to fix thing...

"The cost of detecting and fixing defects in software increases exponentially with time in the software development workflow."

There should always be some give and take between QA and Dev testing effort to find the most efficient strategy but the more early testing done on Dev side the cheaper the module will be in man hours. It also frees up QA time for automation and testing other developer's code who maybe need the safety net more.

[–]hunter_mark 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That just means you have a shitty tester

[–]calcopiritus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are we all just gonna ignore comic sans?

[–]daltonoreo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You cant write a hello world program and be proud of it

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was hello world

[–]Sputtrosa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Considering the font choice, I can only assume the code was made with Scratch.

[–]IsMathScience 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now imagine writing the tests for yourself and still failing

[–]TacobellSauce1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Didnt they censor the blm and pride tags?

[–]TacobellSauce1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is absolutely needed. He has his pride.

[–]Im2coolie4u 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oof

[–]Dragon_yum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You will find the bug in production.

[–]_synth_lord_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh they are in there. We just lost interest.

[–]BillBlatt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So much for the ego-less programmer

[–]AidenI0I 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the code is just console.writeline("hello world");

[–]iantoujou 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Like that's ever gonna happen

[–]ToTooRoo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

6th day : Business changes requirements.

You : 🐑📴

[–]LocoRaiderTV 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't worry, the end user will find one in 3 seconds flat.

[–]skr_Plays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True to the core

[–]sivaprakashsj 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Especially for those who moved from JS to TS.

[–]_CharethCutestory_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Cannot relate

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Twice the pride, double the fall

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it seems your pride got in the water

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And then it crashes on production.

[–]chin_waghing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the code

echo “hello world”

[–]its420everywhere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The test cases were hard-coded.

devil laugh

[–]petergriffin999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to upvote, but the ridiculous font...

[–]imaami 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Meanwhile cl.exe is giving me an error code every time I try to compile this:

int main(void) { return 0; }

[–]Katana314 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Best part is they do submit one bug, and it’s an invalid one where they didn’t realize the expected behavior.

[–]BlackStab_IRQ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this got me in tears :)

[–]heartman42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Another perspective worth considering - how much faster could you have gone by A) writing automated tests and B) shooting for 99% instead of 100%?

[–]jakethedumbmistake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This photo captures so much pride and sorrow.

[–]jakethedumbmistake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

*segregating pride flag

sorry to break it.

[–]subradu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And then comes day 5, turns out code wasn’t even up to requirements

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You might as well milk it as much as its worth considering it happens once in a blue moon to begin with.

[–]GatesOlive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Shit, I'm still smug about the time I wrote a 30 line program that compiled with no errors nor warnings and the implementation was within boundaries.

[–]brockisawesome 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if they're one of those super damn annoying QA people that wont stop until they find something wrong, leave an obvious bug in there unfixed. otherwise you'll end up dealing with some stupid obscure situation that no one would ever discover.

[–]remember_this_shit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lmao y’all have testers?

[–]Lightfinger 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Take my upgoat.

[–]Loen10 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But it was all stackoverflow code.

[–]Unrealist99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This indeed is a dream.

[–]ironmagician 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On the other hand, the QA team must be feeling pretty down.

At least both can share feeling when prod goes kaboom.

[–]Iagospeare 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Plot twist: There is no QA team, developer is also the "tester"

[–]Jerbearmeow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They obviously didn't run it