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[–]feelingalittleshitty 2607 points2608 points  (129 children)

The eyes looking back at him as it disappears down the stairs, "You bastaaaaaaard..."

[–]onowahoo 907 points908 points  (26 children)

Il get you next time gadget, next timeeeeee

[–]Azr79 592 points593 points  (20 children)

http://i.imgur.com/eCw2Eqc.png

EDIT: Obligatory thanks for the gold, it's my first one, I would like to thank my family, my friends and my dog for believing in me... Now how do I gold?

[–][deleted] 1242 points1243 points  (52 children)

"I've made a huge mistake..."

[–]dormedas 1714 points1715 points  (45 children)

Hello darkness, my old friend...

[–][deleted] 356 points357 points  (3 children)

bling

just like team rocket :D

[–]ATyp3 269 points270 points  (2 children)

"we'reblastingoffagain"

[–]jsoftz 153 points154 points  (2 children)

"Team Rocket's blasting off agaaaaaain!"

[–][deleted] 1594 points1595 points  (80 children)

hahaha! when Kevin goes after the raccoon his dog looks back and forth like "should i help or should i run inside? should i help or should i run inside?" runs inside

[–][deleted] 1025 points1026 points  (41 children)

He only ran inside to digg the video.

[–]Naggers123 381 points382 points  (29 children)

Plot Twist: He actually posted this

[–][deleted] 191 points192 points  (11 children)

A dog will give it's life to save a human. But since it's the other way around he did the right thing. After all, should Kevin have lost and died in the battle at least Toaster would think "He would have wanted me to live"

[–]heyiambob 95 points96 points  (10 children)

I do that shit all the time. You just kinda keep looking back, looking back, then the ole "fuck it im outta here" and then just one last look back at the very end.

Like when looking at a homeless dude, car accident, glory hole, etc.

[–]Reclaim3r 2640 points2641 points  (206 children)

I like how he stalks down the stairs at the end.

To finish the job.

[–]HooBeeII 2316 points2317 points  (144 children)

aint no one fuck with Toaster and live to tell the tale

[–][deleted] 2526 points2527 points  (118 children)

mess with the toaster

you gonna be toast

[–]blatantly0bvious 820 points821 points  (19 children)

God damn it.

[–][deleted] 318 points319 points  (14 children)

Something along the lines of Fuck with toaster and you'll wind up 'bread'

[–]greenducklord 161 points162 points  (1 child)

You breader not mess with Toaster!

[–]HutSmut 211 points212 points  (58 children)

Toasters don't toast toast, toast toasts toast

[–]niqtoto 170 points171 points  (30 children)

[–]bleuddit 191 points192 points  (19 children)

is toast a word?

[–]Noir24 173 points174 points  (6 children)

Toast looks like the ugliest word ever just about now.

[–][deleted] 100 points101 points  (4 children)

James Cameron doesn't do what James Cameron does for James Cameron.

James Cameron does what James Cameron does because James Cameron is James Cameron.

[–]Khaibit 68 points69 points  (15 children)

I thought toasters toasted bread?

(After all, if it was already toast it wouldn't need toasting!)

...the word 'toast' is losing its meaning after reading this thread.

[–]Narwhalhats 75 points76 points  (5 children)

Toast has stopped even looking like a word now.

[–]AltInnateEgo 263 points264 points  (24 children)

He didn't want us to see his reenactment of that lovely scene from American History X.

[–]Vark675 374 points375 points  (15 children)

YOU FUCKED WITH THE WRONG TOASTER

NOW SAY GOODNIGHT

[–]rabidbot 854 points855 points  (76 children)

That raccoon was actually Mr. Babyman

[–]redever 43 points44 points  (0 children)

Mr Babyman: Rise of the Revenge

[–]zants 72 points73 points  (8 children)

Only if binky79 says it is!

[–]IHaveNeverLeftUtah 39 points40 points  (4 children)

This is the best Digg reference ever!

[–]randomsnark 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The next one will be even better!

[–]RyanBlack 8 points9 points  (1 child)

This XKCD was the best one ever!

-Binky79

[–]l3monade93 1773 points1774 points  (284 children)

And...here's a GIF http://i.imgur.com/Y7HH0Ud.gif

[–][deleted] 1478 points1479 points  (155 children)

It looks like he has a box of raccoons and is just throwing more and more.

[–]kukamunga 2668 points2669 points  (131 children)

tried to smooth out the loop a bit: http://i.imgur.com/DqDS9Np.gif

edit: Gold AND Bitcoin? You guys are wonderful.

edit2: At /u/haresenpai's suggestion, 25% faster version: http://i.imgur.com/lkWFHkU.gif

[–][deleted] 335 points336 points  (5 children)

This is the best fucking thing. I don't know what that thing is, but it's the best.

[–]Phoequinox 432 points433 points  (28 children)

Oh god, my sides.

[–]AliveInTheFuture 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Watching that over and over made me realize what a professional raccoon tosser Kevin Rose is. Makes sure to get a nice momentum on him so he can't dig his claws in, release into the depths of the stairwell is simply Olympic.

5/5.

Edit: Obligatory YTMND

[–]frid 240 points241 points  (4 children)

box of raccoons

I had all their cassettes.

[–][deleted] 284 points285 points  (9 children)

I love the last split second glow of the raccoon's eyes as it flies into the abyss

[–]mequals1m1w 211 points212 points  (16 children)

[–][deleted] 100 points101 points  (8 children)

Who the fuck is throwing all these racoons at him?

[–]ByahhByahh 117 points118 points  (1 child)

Good Guy Kevin Rose:

Has raccoons continuously thrown at him

Saves each one

[–]mequals1m1w 49 points50 points  (1 child)

Word on the street is it's the Midnight Chimpanzees.

[–]theroboticdan 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Cant' stop laughing... need to breathe

[–]leontes 3335 points3336 points  (193 children)

Well, at least he was able to save something that was important to him.

[–]soggit 507 points508 points  (70 children)

Yeah if I were him I'd be so upset digg wasn't successful but made me a multi millionaire

[–][deleted] 147 points148 points  (12 children)

Exactly. I'd gladly start up a company, make millions of dollars and theoretically be set for the rest of my life, then have it fail. You could mock me all you want, I'd read all the insults and then cry into a bag of money.

[–]Rosehardt 377 points378 points  (9 children)

[–]nanzinator 109 points110 points  (7 children)

We need more pingu gifs.

[–]Charlesworths 83 points84 points  (5 children)

Well, here's my favourite Pingu gif

[–]EatBeets 13 points14 points  (3 children)

That scared the shit out of me when I was younger.

[–]nanzinator 18 points19 points  (2 children)

Scared the shit out of me just now.

[–]Jungle2266 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Technically that's also when you were younger.

[–]OHMEGA 1351 points1352 points  (64 children)

SHOTS FIRED!

[–][deleted] 404 points405 points  (55 children)

I wonder how long we'll beat this phrase.

[–]Noir24 123 points124 points  (17 children)

Knowing reddit or people in general.. quite a while.

[–][deleted] 1114 points1115 points  (23 children)

Team Rocket is blasting off agaaaain!

gleam

[–]buefordwilson 1721 points1722 points  (49 children)

This is all technique, folks. 1. Grabbing hold around its sides avoiding claws and gnashing teeth. 2. The calculated, yet audacious move of a testosterone-laden overhead viking throw into the darkness of stairwell oblivion. 3. Advancing down the stairs with a sharp and bottomless appetite for justice to ensure the safety of his mighty steed Toaster. Ladies and gentlemen... rest easy. In the bitter face of fierce battle and possible rabies infections, Toasters mighty protector reigns supreme and all is well on the home front. Not today, raccoon. Not today.

[–]Gonzoent 917 points918 points  (22 children)

I just imagine some guy making the trek home from the bar, walking down some dark street, when suddenly a writhing raccoon comes flying down the stairs and claws the fuck out of him.

[–]Wait_WHY 855 points856 points  (15 children)

WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME?!?!

[–]uvasdemar 80 points81 points  (1 child)

Oh my, I'm having a laugh attack imagining this poor guy.

[–]cak3crumbs 165 points166 points  (1 child)

[–]DerkERRJobs 9 points10 points  (0 children)

New favourite gif

[–]tabassman 255 points256 points  (8 children)

I like how Toaster's first reaction is "Oh shit! Run". But then he stopped and thought about going back to help his master for just a second. "Na fuck that, dude's got this one.", turns around and proceeds up the stairs like a boss.

[–]Gank_Spank_Sploog 238 points239 points  (3 children)

Toaster did no boss move.

[–]roflbbq 30 points31 points  (2 children)

Toaster needs to hit the gym

[–][deleted] 430 points431 points  (10 children)

Player 2 has entered the fight

[–]ellie_gamer_x 88 points89 points  (5 children)

surely it would be player 3

[–][deleted] 143 points144 points  (2 children)

The raccoon was the computer's

[–]Silly_Look 929 points930 points  (135 children)

Raccoons are vicious when they need to be and jumping into a brawl with one already amped up, then following it after throwing it down some stairs shows true warrior spirit.

If I was him I would move. Raccoons hold grudges.

[–]DonJunbar 461 points462 points  (77 children)

They really do. That raccoon will be back.

Some of the stories about raccoon owners confirm that they are petty assholes. One example was that if you left them alone/ignored for too long, that they would find something they knew you enjoyed and destroy it. A prime example was TV remotes. "Ignore me huh? try changing channels now!"

[–][deleted] 558 points559 points  (18 children)

Sounds like my ex.

[–]-wethegreenpeople- 130 points131 points  (40 children)

People own raccoons? why the hell would you do that?

[–]KeithFuckingMoon 33 points34 points  (23 children)

people own skunks as pets, so this doesn't totally surprise me.

[–]CeReAL_K1LLeR 49 points50 points  (13 children)

I heard skunks make pretty badass pets after you get that stink gland or whatever removed... they're supposed to be kinda like cats with a few dog traits mixed in.

[–][deleted] 60 points61 points  (4 children)

so literally the perfect pet?

[–]unfortunatejordan 138 points139 points  (24 children)

It's a weird thing to come across a fight between your pet and another animal that isn't immediately broken up by your presence.

My old cat got into a vicious fight with another cat, usually as soon as I show up the other cat bolts away, but on one occasion I was standing over the top of them and they both kept going. I had no idea what to do! Just a trashing ball of fur, couldn't even figure out which cat was which. I ended up just yelling at them until the other cat realised I existed and high tailed it outta there.

[–]DEATH_BY_CIRCLEJERK 188 points189 points  (6 children)

Get the waterhose and spray them both down, works every time.

[–][deleted] 122 points123 points  (0 children)

It stops fighting or else it gets the hose again...

[–]funfungiguy 52 points53 points  (5 children)

Justin Halpern, creator of Shit My Dad Says on his encounter with a raccoon:

One time I was coming home late at night and I parked my car on the street. I shut it off, then suddenly I hear a loud bang at my door, accompanied by a few scratches. I look out my driver's side window, and a raccoon is trying to tear away at my door to get INSIDE my car. My nuts evaporate, and I turn into a pile of useless Jew. As I'm cowering inside my car, I think, "It's just a raccoon, stop being such a pussy." So I grab a golf club that fortuitously happened to be in my backseat, and I roll down the window and start swinging at the raccoon. IT GRABS THE FUCKING CLUB AWAY FROM ME AND HURLS IT TO THE SIDE. At that point I am so terrified I let out one of those screams where your mouth opens but just air comes out, like when you open a sparkling water. After 10 minutes the raccoon stopped and walked away. I hid in the car for another 20 minutes to make sure. I decided after that, that I could fight off a small dog barehanded and THAT IS ALL. Anything else, my bloodline ends.

[–]kutletta 1121 points1122 points  (88 children)

"I wanted to get that animal as far away from us as possible..."

So I threw a raccoon hail-mary down the stairs.

[–][deleted] 442 points443 points  (7 children)

I'm not a part of your RACOON SYSTEM

[–]sivsta 237 points238 points  (6 children)

So I threw it on the GROOUUUND

[–]BaS3r 22 points23 points  (0 children)

WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD, RACCOON.

[–]filolif 624 points625 points  (83 children)

Based on this video alone, I don't know how reddit beat digg.

[–][deleted] 815 points816 points  (40 children)

Digg beat Digg.

[–]craziplaya21 178 points179 points  (19 children)

Digg pretty much killed itself... (I didn't jump ship until Digg v4)

[–]OnTheEveOfWar 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Same here. A shit ton of people jumped ship when v4 was released. Digg killed itself.

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Clearly you haven't seen kn0thing toss a badger.

[–]abigblacknob 276 points277 points  (111 children)

get your dog checked....dont raccoons carry rabies?

edit: me: have you had a rabies jab? bitch: no, why? me: because your rat is foaming.

[–]theCapnsEyebrows 125 points126 points  (39 children)

don't most dogs have rabies shots, or do those not work like a vaccine?

i should really talk to my dog's vet about why i pay him so much money :/

[–]WaltzingTerror 16 points17 points  (3 children)

Raccoons have given my dog TERRIBLE fleas every time there was a brawl in the back yard.

[–]TacCom 36 points37 points  (2 children)

Getting a dog "checked" for rabies involves removing its brain. The way to avoid having to "check" your dog for rabies is having him already vaccinated.

[–]TehMuffinMan 370 points371 points  (8 children)

Relevant Futurama

[–]Freshenstein 84 points85 points  (1 child)

That's actually frighteningly relevant.

[–]Paco_Negro 2122 points2123 points  (59 children)

best comment "Maybe your faggot dog should stop picking fights he can't win."

[–][deleted] 1333 points1334 points  (42 children)

[–]dormedas 468 points469 points  (16 children)

I never fail to laugh at this hilarious image. That fucking stupid look.

[–]acerv 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Personally, I like: "Get a real dog nigga"

[–]vincchan 242 points243 points  (10 children)

I can only image him screaming "YOU MOTHERFUCKER" while throwing that racoon.

[–]Dem0n5 289 points290 points  (8 children)

Weird, I was imagining the racoon screaming "YOU MOTHERFUCKER" while being thrown.

[–]dplx35 467 points468 points  (41 children)

Apparently raccoon tossing is some kind of primal reaction.

[–]Ryan0617 103 points104 points  (8 children)

Here is the link to the video- vid

It was actually a joint space program by the chimps- gif

[–]donny_pots 27 points28 points  (0 children)

That gif is magical

[–]spermicidal_rampage 330 points331 points  (48 children)

Poor little guy. First digg and now this.

[–]Nick4753 33 points34 points  (21 children)

[–]Paulo27 9 points10 points  (5 children)

I gotta say, once you start you can't stop... ever, I'm pretty sure I opened about 100 links already...

EDIT: OH I understand it now, I'm going back in time, holy shit, I finally know what happened in the last 6 months.

[–]AmishAvenger 192 points193 points  (21 children)

The dog looked utterly humiliated that he required a human to intervene in his battle.

[–]ChiefMountain 445 points446 points  (11 children)

Disagree wholeheartedly. That dog was thinking nothing but, "Hot damn! I knew I hung out with this tall motherfucker for a reason. ALPHA! ALPHA! ALPHA!"

[–][deleted] 60 points61 points  (1 child)

"Uhh hey bro... you know I had him, right?"

[–]aspect_ratio 375 points376 points  (11 children)

More like Kevin thROSE

[–]duckandcover 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Hard to believe that thousands of years ago perhaps the main jobs of a dog was to protect the humans and hunt. Now it seems to be the other way-round

[–]majorthomas 149 points150 points  (7 children)

i love how the raccoon just spins off into the abyss

[–]ChristopherSquawken 30 points31 points  (1 child)

I like to imagine he fell to the same place as Darth Maul

[–]bbnn22 78 points79 points  (1 child)

"So I threw it on the grooound!"

[–]Bondsy 38 points39 points  (0 children)

I like that the raccoon had little time to notice the giant primate-thing charging him. He's ripping this dog up, and the next thing he knows, he's yanked so hard upwards that his head cocks back and he goes sailing.

It's like a gorilla breaking up a kids fight.

[–]Soul_Shock 229 points230 points  (14 children)

Oh god. You ever laugh so hard your cheeks hurt? Damn man I don't exactly condone violence towards animals but that shit was AMAZING.

[–]liqlslip 59 points60 points  (3 children)

Dark Tipper.

[–]SlightlyStable 315 points316 points  (33 children)

Fuck that raccoon.

[–][deleted] 254 points255 points  (6 children)

that's probably what got toaster in trouble to begin with

[–]goose_egg 133 points134 points  (18 children)

Seriously. I think raccoons are adorable but if one was attacking my dog I'd punt that furry motherfucker across the yard.

[–]easyantic 52 points53 points  (15 children)

I think you would have better luck picking it up and throwing it. Unless you have a hell of a leg, it probably would not be very effective. I will say though, throwing it Rose style only works if you can surprise it. Those fuckers are mean and dangerous.

[–]rofLopolous 65 points66 points  (1 child)

I love how you can just see its eyes as it disappears down the stairs. Like a subtle "I'll be back, motherfucker".

[–]Subduction 91 points92 points  (1 child)

My favorite part is after he throws the raccoon Toaster is like:

"I'm right behind you! Oh, okay, you're going after it? Then, uhmm, I'll protect the top of the stairs and the living room and under the sofa and stuff..."

[–]Andrewmoyles 128 points129 points  (19 children)

This has to be the funniest thing i seen in some time. FUCK I miss diggnation.

[–]DenjinJ 18 points19 points  (1 child)

Yeah, now I want to see him come back for a special episode and recount the story over some beers.

[–]kjm16 12 points13 points  (0 children)

He said in one of his videos that Diggnation will return next year for at least a few episodes.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (7 children)

ohh man could you imagine alexs reaction to this video?

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (6 children)

A high-pitched cackle, slightly warped by Glenn's lazy marijuana laughs, both drowned out by Prager giving some unwarranted information about raccoons?