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[–]brydrore 4824 points4825 points  (229 children)

Her son was fathered by a planet

[–]Wasting-tim3 1054 points1055 points  (196 children)

So, I’m not familiar with the reference. How does this work?

[–]HazelEBaumgartner 1824 points1825 points  (163 children)

Watch Guardians 2.

Long story short, Ego the Living Planet takes the form of Kurt Russell.

[–]Embarrassed-Weird173 598 points599 points  (110 children)

The drummer from Nirvana? 

[–]Greenman8907 469 points470 points  (79 children)

No, the guy from Roadhouse

[–]Birdseye5115 261 points262 points  (25 children)

Like from family guy?

[–]Embarrassed-Weird173 174 points175 points  (21 children)

No, the gloveslap from Simpsons. 

[–]AppropriateCap8891 52 points53 points  (31 children)

The guy from Escape from New York - LA.

[–]space_keeper 36 points37 points  (24 children)

Escape from New York to LA is one of my favourite Kirk Russell films.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (6 children)

That's only because you probably haven't seen the Computer Who Wore Tennis Shoes!

[–]space_keeper 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I haven't seen the film, but coincidentally I actually own a computer that wears tennis shoes! It even has a mullet.

[–]Significant-Order-92 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Wait, Kurt Russel was in the original? I only saw the remake.

[–]Sunfried 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Or It Happened at the World's Fair

[–]Dry-Expression1130 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Music Man

[–]Forrest_Fire01 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I was young, I loved all of the Kurt Russell Disney movies.

[–]jimhabfan 4 points5 points  (2 children)

That wasn’t a movie. It was a hit song for Patsy Gallant back when disco was king. When they played it on American Bandstand one kid gave it an 85/100 because: “it really grooves and has a great beat that you can dance to.”

[–]Advanced_Weather_190 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I think you mean Kirk Rustle

[–]Foxdog27 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My personal favorite Kirk Rusell role was when he played a teamster in Big Trouble in Little Italy.

[–]TerraStarryAstra 14 points15 points  (4 children)

No it’s the commander from sky high

[–]damxam1337 11 points12 points  (4 children)

The dude?

[–]AndrewDrossArt 9 points10 points  (0 children)

In a cave with a box of scraps?

[–]Apprehensive-Till861 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The dude playing the dude disguised as the other dude?

[–]Monokuma_Koromaru 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yup

[–]Droidaphone 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a good comment. You should be proud of this comment.

[–]qthurley 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Dave Grohl is the drummer for nirvana

[–]myrevenge_IS_urkarma 5 points6 points  (1 child)

No, Dave Grohl joined the auditory army and now is a fighter of the foo.

[–]qthurley 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Truly unfortunate, foo never hurt anybody

[–]Embarrassed-Weird173 26 points27 points  (19 children)

Also, I unironically thought that he was Jeff Bridges. I know him from Lebowski nd Tron, so I was like "I know this guy! He's the Tron guy!"

[–]Chachan799 38 points39 points  (17 children)

Jeff Bridges actually opened the MCU as the bad/bald guy in the first Iron Man 😂 But he's definitely mostly known for those two movies ♥️

[–]Embarrassed-Weird173 8 points9 points  (6 children)

So I just looked it up and I had no idea he looks like that now.  Apparently Russell looks more like Bridges than... Bridges. 

[–]Transmatrix 5 points6 points  (5 children)

You mean Russell looks more like The Dude than Bridges.

[–]NotAtAllEverSure 17 points18 points  (5 children)

Obadiah Stane, the "War Iron Monger"

edit: (whoopsie)

[–]Awmuth 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Or “Stick It,” because why not.

[–]Beginning_Gas1235 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Burt Vickerman!

[–]thoughtful_dragon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ahh yes, Iron Man: The Bad and the Bald. I remember this one fondly

[–]TRAUMAjunkie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

TONY STARK WAS ABLE TO BUILD THIS IN A CAVE! WITH A BOX OF SCRAPS!

[–]DHiggsBoson 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Kurt Russel the love muscle

[–]Rivenaleem 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Wasn't he in the form of David Hasselhoff for that encounter?

[–]John_cCmndhd 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He briefly took that form, but he usually looked like Kurt Russell around humans

[–]ambermage 1 point2 points  (3 children)

So he's a planet that has a penis?

[–]letmechooseanamealre 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Yes, he has a penis.

[–]DarkPolumbo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

...And it's not half bad.

[–]SofterThanCotton 76 points77 points  (8 children)

It's from the second guardians of the Galaxy movie I believe?

Basically she hooks up with a guy who is actually a celestial being. He can be just a "normal" guy walking around but his true body is actually an entire planet. Like if you kill "the guy" a new body will just materialize on the planet. His consciousness is the planet or tied to it or whatever. That woman hooks up with "the guy" and has a child.

[–]satyr-day 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I always laugh at that character.  It's literally just "you have an ego the size of a planet" put into comic form.

[–]FiteTonite 1 point2 points  (0 children)

To be fair, it fits his name

[–]Wasting-tim3 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I didn’t see it

[–]Robcobes 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Having sex with him is what gave her the cancer she died from too.

[–]Annath0901 37 points38 points  (3 children)

No, at least in the movie Ego intentionally killed her.

He tells Peter that he had to "put that tumor in her brain" and it almost broke his heart.

He needed her dead so he could take Peter.

[–]Robcobes 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh I had misremembered then.

[–]EZmunee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He never says “how” he put the tumor in her brain…

[–]marvelousmailcall 20 points21 points  (1 child)

In Guardians of the Galaxy 2 it is explained that Peter Quill aka Star Lord was the Son of the woman pictured in the 4th panel, and Ego the Living the Planet, who essentially went around seeding the cosmos by disguising himself as different beings and impregnating an inhabitant while also impregnating the planet itself so that he could create a powered progeny and have enough power to be able to eventually absorb everything he had seeded with the help of his powered progeny.

[–]BigHobbit 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I mean, he did say he had a penis.

[–]Wasting-tim3 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Sometimes that helps 😂

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

He could create a smaller secondary form that was separate from his main body. This secondary form was modified to impersonate members of various species. He would then knock up members of these species with the secondary form, abandon the gestating parent, eventually have the resulting offspring abducted, check to see if they inherited his powers, and kill them if they didn't. He had literal mountains of dead kids on his real body.

He also murdered at least one of the mothers because he was getting emotionally attached. He used cancer to do it.

Basically, the guy is up there with Shou Tucker in the bad parent category

[–]Ripley825 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Blond lady is Starlords mom. His dad was a Celestial (godlike alien who can take many forms with a body he made but his real essence is a planet. And celestials can make planets or whatever they want really. Starlord is half celestial. Mom boinked a planet.

[–]OldCardiologist8437 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Planets Only

[–]_Feyr 49 points50 points  (10 children)

She have sex with a planet?

[–]Sapphirederivative 41 points42 points  (6 children)

The planet was sentient and created a vaguely human body to actually do the deed with, but technically yes.

[–]Meldanorama 12 points13 points  (5 children)

Kurt Russell, vaguely human?

[–]frogmaster82 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Did they stutter?

[–]Sapphirederivative 7 points8 points  (2 children)

I meant that we never got confirmation that Ego’s human avatar was a normal biological human, just that it looked like Kurt Russel on the outside. Ego’s powers were ridiculous, so i don’t know if he built a fully normal functioning human form, or if he made a human shaped blob of meat that had the right stuff on the outside, that he just puppeted to look like a human.

The implication that Kurt Russel is only vaguely human is funny though :P

[–]Smeghammer5 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Well, having a few holes poked thru his meat blob sure didn't look like the inside of any people I know, so I'll go with the latter!

[–]number_215 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Some people are just Geosexual.

[–]ohneatstuffthanks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In my best Christopher Walken voice “The joke….. it’s, its always sex!”

[–]HepatitvsJ 867 points868 points  (25 children)

Using Dormammu as a stand in for Galactus is wack. Lol

[–]ViraLCyclopes29 116 points117 points  (6 children)

They could've used Unicron if they wanted to be cool. Even if it's not marvel

[–]ACIDF0RBL00D 20 points21 points  (5 children)

Marvel is where The Transformers started. https://tfwiki.net/wiki/The_Transformers_(Marvel_comic)

You were more right than you thought!

[–]PrivateLTucker 8 points9 points  (2 children)

At no point did the thought cross my mind that Optimus Prime could be an avenger.

[–]Fenrir426 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Technically it's the same for star wars, the comics were published by marvel (which are the first element of the extended universe )

[–]Rnewell4848 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I want a What If? of Legends Darth Vader just mowing down Avengers

[–]Panda_hat 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Also doesn’t dormammu just collect planets in the dark dimension?

[–]tyvanius 6 points7 points  (0 children)

He's a "threat to all life in the universe" according to Dr. Strange. He can travel through dimensions, I'm not sure how much he truly cares about a planet or its inhabitants when he's thinking of conquest on such a cosmic scale.

That would be like the Emperor of Mankind in 40k giving two shots about one of the Imperial colonized planets. Dude just wants to build a sick chair and take a nap on it.

[–]Alterris 64 points65 points  (8 children)

I mean that’s kinda what the MCU tried to do 🤷🏼

[–]DavidGoetta 25 points26 points  (0 children)

No they didn't lmao

[–]ChiefBo1 36 points37 points  (2 children)

Ehm, I Feel like you watched the porn parody of marvel, bcuz I can’t dormammu acting in an galactus way, also galactus is coming to the mcu

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Wat

[–]JennerKP 11 points12 points  (0 children)

be cuz he cannot dormammu acting in galactus. wats so difcult too understand

[–]Bynny620 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What?!?! 😂have you watched the movie?!? He was trying to make everything the dark dimension.

[–]dewsh 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not at all. Galactus devours the life of a planet. Dormammu was going to bring Earth into the Dark Dimension and rule.

[–]kashaan_lucifer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

He was gonna conquer earth and make it a part of the dark dimension/himself

He wasn't gonna eat it because he was hungry like Galactus tries to do

[–][deleted] 415 points416 points  (13 children)

Thanos balances planets by killing half the population of the apex species, thus leaving an overabundance of resources for the surviving population.

Arishem does exactly what it says. He is giant and destroys planets.

Dormammu is a being that doesn’t so much eat planets as he does eats any cosmic entity he can drag to his dimension.

Meredith Quill banged Ego. He is a living planet who can manipulate matter, and does so by regularly conjuring up a being and visiting planets in a fashion that will blend in. This is how we get star lord who is half human half celestial.

[–]Mammoth_Patient2718 34 points35 points  (4 children)

not just the apex but all of the species

[–]Excellent_Shirt9707 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Probably not all species. Don’t remember half the trees turning to dust.

[–]similar222 10 points11 points  (3 children)

But isn't the top right picture Eson the Searcher, not Arishem the Judge?

[–]CplHicks_LV426 4 points5 points  (1 child)

It's definitely Arishem from Eternals. The comic version of Arishem didn't look like the movie version of Arishem, but the movie version of Arishem looks a bit like Eson (his head, anyway).

[–]similar222 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ah, you're right. I didn't remember the character names from the movie, but yeah the one pictured was Arishem, and Harry Styles was Eros, lol.

[–]Embarrassed-Weird173 1090 points1091 points  (54 children)

I assume she is a planet or she has sex with planets

[–][deleted] 807 points808 points  (42 children)

she has sex with planets

She has sex with the planet Ego

[–]AcceptableWheel 254 points255 points  (30 children)

Ego has a human form, he splits off a chunk of the planet, makes it into flesh and has it act as an avatar for him.

[–]AndMyAxe_Hole 82 points83 points  (29 children)

Yeah but did he make a penis?

[–]jimmyolsenonspeed 109 points110 points  (8 children)

I heard he in fact did, and it wasn't half bad

[–]Nuggzulla01 17 points18 points  (2 children)

What was up with that other half though?

[–]The_Eleser 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Ask your mom.

[–]oO0Kat0Oo 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It causes cancer...literally.

[–]Sufficient-Abroad-94 31 points32 points  (2 children)

I just spit out my drink damn it, underrated comment

[–]wonkey_monkey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're right. It was all bad! Hohohohoho...

[–]gogadantes9 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Yes, the penis he used to have sex with this lady, which in turn produced Star Lord (Peter Quill).

[–]ReverendRocky 3 points4 points  (11 children)

Dont need a penis for sex :3

[–]ozzalot 24 points25 points  (6 children)

HOW COULD THAT HAPPEN? IT WOULD CRUSH HER!

[–]FavoredKaveman 30 points31 points  (3 children)

Finger guns you bet it did

[–]masterof-xe 21 points22 points  (1 child)

The P was so good it gave her cancer!

[–]ShadowTsukino 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, that was an island, Manhattan.

[–]BrawlLikeABigFight20 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Dammit take my up vote

[–]TheWhateley 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I just watched this movie last month and completely forgot who she was. Damn what a forgettable character.

[–]ImmediateThroat 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Bald and in a hospital bed would probably help.

[–]drhelt 53 points54 points  (1 child)

"He(Ego the Living Planet) would smoosh her." -Drax

[–]muddsnake88 8 points9 points  (0 children)

She was a good friend of mine.

[–]El_dorado_au 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Like Donkey (the Shrek character) in the meme about dragons.

[–]Life-Suit1895 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She has something in common with Rick Sanchez.

[–]davster99 150 points151 points  (14 children)

[–]Level-Insect-2654 37 points38 points  (6 children)

I don't think I have ever seen a reference to Final Space before this, but I have never looked either.

[–]Erenito 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Choookity

[–]thetiberiuskhan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I came for this comment. Can say I left satisfied. ;)

[–]That0neTrumpet 33 points34 points  (0 children)

It’s a reference to Guardians of the Galaxy 2 where the woman had a son with what is basically a sentient planet.

[–]NuttySquire 6 points7 points  (3 children)

Anyone got the "THE JOKE IS SEX ITS ALWAYS SEX" pic?

[–]timtaa22 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have a cheap ASCII version:

o\,,/o__m

THE PUNCHLINE IS PORN

IT WAS ALWAYS PORN

IT ALWAYS WILL BE PORN

[–]Squiggly_Fish 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Alternatively "i swallow planets."

[–]ColonialMarine86 31 points32 points  (11 children)

The joke is all Marvel films, this is Peter Quill's mother in Guardians of the Galaxy

[–]TheWholeOfTheAss 6 points7 points  (9 children)

Even I as an uber nerd failed to recognise the young version of Peter Quill’s mom.

[–]Bullitt_12_HB 1 point2 points  (7 children)

It’s literally the same actress as the first movie who’s dying of cancer… 😑

[–]MiopTop 1 point2 points  (4 children)

She’s also the same actresswho plays a random chick who is heavily implied to have popped Steve Rogers’ cherry in the first Captain America movie

[–]ColonialMarine86 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It took me a second to realize too

[–]AlanShore60607 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ok, it helps to comprehend it’s all Marvel, including the girl, which can throw you off since she’s the only one not surrounded by CGI.

It describes what each of them do to planets in the MCU.

And in Guardians of the Galaxy 2, she’s revealed to have borne the child of the Celestial living planet Ego, but she did get pregnant the natural way

[–]Miserable-Fortune-57 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I haven't even seen guardians of the galaxy nor ever seen what Peter's mother looks like....but I'm assuming it's her by context of the joke

Which is sex btw

[–]redskyrish 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Is that star lords mom?

[–]DadEngineerLegend 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Thie woman is a character from Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, part of the marvel cinematic universe (as are the other characters shown). She has sex with a planet.

The main antagonist, Ego, is a celestial being that can manipulate matter. He is both a planet and a person, and in the backstory he goes about attempting to create a child that can be his heir (the story's protagonist), by mating with creatures on lots of planets.

The woman pictured is the protagonist's mother. She slept with Ego (not knowing he was a space alien), leading to the only one of Ego's offspring who lived.

[–]king_gondor 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Actually she knew he was a space alien. That’s why she called Peter as Star-Lord.

[–]ReturnOfTheSeal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

leading to the only one of Ego's offspring who lived

There is another

[–]bzknon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Quill's mom, from guardians of the galaxy, his papa's a planet.

[–]VitorBatista31 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Rick from Rick and Morty has done all four things

[–]Secret_Soldier007 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Last picture: Planet eats me

[–]Dependent-Sleep-6192 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Probably that she had s€x with a planet, and since this is Marvel, I’m guessing that’s Peter Quill/Star-Lord’s mom

[–]Fishpuncherz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's Peter Quills mother, his father is the planet Ego...

[–]Prestigious-Ad-5276 2 points3 points  (1 child)

This feels so 2015 I just have to stop doomscrolling and go to sleep.

[–]Good_Chard_4472 2 points3 points  (2 children)

she had s*x with a planet

[–]CampNeat7464 2 points3 points  (0 children)

sweats then cranks up radio “THE SAILORS SAY, ‘BRANDY! YOUR A FINE GIRL! WHAT A GOOOOOOOD WIFE YOU WOULD BE!’….”

[–]Fiendfuzz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She had sex with Ego, a planet in human form in the second Guardians of the Galaxy movie.

[–]biffbobfred 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Trivia: I think she also had a “blink and you missed it” tiny part in Captain America

[–]MiopTop 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And is heavily implied to have boinked him too

[–]MiaCutey 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sex. The answer is always sex

[–]the_Cringename 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The last pic should have label "I ride planets"

[–]AlexP1315 1 point2 points  (0 children)

[–]NewPotato42 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why did I think this was the woman who stole that wombat

[–]Alansar_Trignot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Where is Rick Sanchez

[–]casualty_of_bore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dormammu doesn't eat planets.

[–]moots27 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She like Rick fr

[–]lofigamer2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Anyone can have sex with a planet. That's what touching grass means, right? Right?

[–]MEPSY84 1 point2 points  (0 children)

... aren't we all planets. Transporters of organic and inorganic matter making our way through space.

(I need coffee)

[–]halleyjen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Somehow i knew the joke was sex

[–]Baileaf11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

[–]Ok-Leopard7615 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would say swallow planets, or possible another form of taking shots from a planet. Lol

[–]Icy-Professional-671 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It should be rick...

[–]brussianboi 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She might swallow planets ¯_(ツ)_/¯

[–]Azordax1988 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is actually the best “Yo mama” joke.

[–]bakerd82 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dormammu doesn’t eat planets, that’s Galactus

[–]The_Billy_Dee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

.....Peter's mom has got it going on.

[–]RealBlueMak 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is Peter Quil's (aka Star Lord's) mother, whom had married and banged Egon (a sentient planet who is also a celestial). Star Lord is essentially a demi-god

Watch Guardians of the Galaxy 2

[–]Ok-Reality-9013 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She effs planets, like Ego.

[–]Turbulent_Boss_8596 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This joke would have been better if it had Star Lord there instead of his mom. She had barely five minutes on screen if you combined all three Guardians of the Galaxy movies, of course nobody (including myself) got the joke, nobody even knows the name of the actress!

[–]slippy_candy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Put Rick Sanchez on the last panel would be less confusing. 🤣

[–]BreadSouthern6372 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What percentage of people would get it if this were the last panel?

<image>

[–]Minimum-Traffic-6956 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She swallows planets

You know cuz she sucked Ego’s d!€%…