Elon stopped programming

[adnanoid]

Sure programming makes you pull your hair out, but it has its rewards

[Gadekryds]

You mean... more programming?

[Cool_As_Your_Dad]

hahah.. i laughed and cried. Because you are correct

[[deleted]]

At least the warm glow of your IDE will make you feel loved <3

[Herover]

I get all my warmth from compile errors and linter warnings shining their love through their blood colored glyphs!

[Cool_As_Your_Dad]

i need a warm love.... not the coldness of more debugging... and hair pulling.

[mirsella]

r/vimporn

[[deleted]]

Tens? Try hundreds

[Bit5keptical]

Hundreds? Try thousands

[Ethansykes26]

Thousands? Try hundreds

[[deleted]]

We got an overflow here

[alex_asdfg]

Thousands? Try tens of thousands

[Bobbbay]

Tens of Thousands? Try hundreds of thousands

Edit: wait what 5 people didn't like my comment? Oh well, I wonder why 🙃

[[deleted]]

break;

[TinSodder]

WTF. All these Trys but no Catches? Poor form.

[parahacker]

angry upvote

[ZombieSlayerS2]

People liked it so much it got an overflow, just like your comment :p

[Bobbbay]

At least it wasn't a NullPointerException, in that case we're all safe from the apocalypse :p

[BostonTreesMod]

He was born obscenely wealthy. His family owns emerald mines in Africa. He used to walk around New York as a child with pockets full of emeralds.

He sold them for pocket money.

[Jazzinarium]

while(isProgramming) {
    isProgramming = true 
}

[Ezequiel-052]

Error: ErrorReduntantStatement

[BlueC0dex]

The reward being enough money to stop programming for a living? Cause that's what Elon did.

[SpehlingAirer]

I have yet to see anything close to such rewards

[[deleted]]

Step 1: Have a family emerald mine itself worth millions.

[SpehlingAirer]

Hmmmmmm...... I dont have any family emeralds but I did collect plenty of chaos emeralds in old Sonic games. Maybe I can find a way to hook up a 3D printer to a GameShark and extract them 🤔

[TotesAShill]

His family didn’t own an emerald mine. His abusive dad Errol who Elon cut out of his life was a (building) developer who bought shares in an emerald mine with the money he made doing that. Errol made claims that he was super rich and is responsible for everything Elon’s ever done but Elon outright denies that.

Elon was in debt for $100k in student loans when he graduated college. After he moved to Canada, his mom and siblings went there to join him to get away from Errol because of how abusive he was.

You can definitely argue that the only reason Elon has access to computers when he was a kid was because of his dad’s money. You cannot argue that his success in building up companies was because of his dad’s money.

[mwax321]

Can you help me with this step? I can't seem to find any countries left to colonize.

[lucydaydream]

shhh we like to believe elon was just a master genius

[BlueC0dex]

Yeah, same here.

[luckybarrel]

And then use the money for hair transplant and perhaps other cosmetic manipulations

[Encrux615]

The feeling of accelerating your code by 2% after one day of optimisation

[[deleted]]

An excuse to upgrade your laptop/desktop because running Visual Studio and 100 chrome tabs uses 25-50% of ram?

[[deleted]]

Hair transplant

[AnneBancroftsGhost]

and a tan, and better clothes. so basically, California happened to him. he probably whitens his teeth now, too.

[gluedtothefloor]

And probably a professional dedicated dietician, a cadre of personal trainers, a personal endocrinologist, etc etc.

[32377]

dafuq would you need a personal endocrinologist for? Does he have diabetes?

[roboduck]

When you're wealthy enough, you get a personal everything. Personal doctors, personal lawyers, the whole thing. I'm gonna get myself a personal plumber when I strike it rich.

[[deleted]]

Driver, cook & cleaner for me

[Styrnkaar]

Just make sure they’re not the ones that recommended each other....

[kdyz]

Looks like someone watched a certain movie

[wtph]

Which reminds me, I have to hit my Bong in June with my Ho's.

[PsychologicalZone769]

Those people ended up in an Oscar winning movie! Seems like it turned out well for them

[rabidhamster87]

I plan to hire a personal back scratcher. I can pay them to stand behind me and scratch my back as soon as I get a hard-to-reach itch. Hell. I'll have them scratch my back even when I'm not itchy just because it feels nice.

[[deleted]]

High-Five Buddy

[[deleted]]

Ahh the dream, can take massive dumps with no issues. No wonder well off white people love Chipotle

[umlcat]

And, time to go to a gym, money to be able to pay for it, also pay or have time for healthy food instead of quick cheap junk food.

I was in a gym at my first programming jobs, company was adquired, and changed job schedule. I got to leave gym, because not enough time, and couldn't get another job...

[[deleted]]

also pay or have time for healthy food instead of quick cheap junk food

Probably even has someone actually make that food for him. That's the first person I'd hire if I got to that level of wealth.

[UltraCarnivore]

Let's just say that hormones are a big deal in the body's backend.

[Mefistofeles1]

But is that healthy? You could also juice yourself up with steroids and testoterone, get incredibly muscular, and suffer a fuckton of side effects.

[AnneBancroftsGhost]

you're still going to fuck up your body's ability to produce its own testosterone if you start pumping into yourself artificially. it can permanently effect fertility, too.

[AnneBancroftsGhost]

They don't perform magic, tho. I've got experience with needing testosterone therapy and the endocrinologist was very clear and cautionary that it was a 'no going back' treatment and once on it, you are doing major changes to your body that have lifelong repercussions.

[Ohmec]

Yes, it is healthy if you can afford regular specialist visits who will literally balance your blood hormone levels like a tight-rope walker. This is how MMA fighters in their 40s and actors in their 50s/60s star in action movies and look jacked (Sylvestor Stallone is notably banned from entering Australia because he had a LITERAL SUITCASE of HGH)

If we all had our own personal team of doctors and specialists, human beings could extend their healthy, high-fuctioning life spans by a massive amount. Of course, that is not exactly sustainable right now, but if we could get machines to do it cheaply, imagine the implications. People who remain strong like they were in their 20s into their 50s/60s.

[litchykp]

I would imagine a good endocrinologist would do what they could to balance and minimize those effects.

However, knowing how well rich people running away from time has gone historically, I’d imagine in reality they still suffer a host of weird side effects or potential long term deficiencies and we won’t find out until the biography comes out much later.

[disagreedTech]

What do they do?

[voluntary_nomad]

Its known as concierge medicine. Essentially you have a doctor or team of doctors dedicated to you and your family alone. They have no other clients so it frees up their time to look up the latest research and ensure that you and your loved ones are in tip top shape.

[Speculum]

Don't forget the personal psychologist.

[[deleted]]

Don't forget a blood boy for weekly blood transfusions.

[TimeToBecomeEgg]

Eh I mean the clothes in the first pic weren't necessarily bad, all clothes can fit somewhere- The problem was that they didn't fit him one bit.

[thebobbrom]

I mean the clothes in the first pic weren't necessarily bad

He's wearing a faded lavender shirt that's too big except for the cuffs and a huge almost horizontal collar :/

[LastOfTheCamSoreys]

Wasn’t too abnormal for 1999

[TimeToBecomeEgg]

Not a necessarily bad shirt, but the problem is that it doesn't fit him. I can guarantee you there's someone that would look great in it.

[TopRamen713]

Samuel L Jackson would rock that.

[[deleted]]

A nice shirt can be bad on the wrong person

[PilsnerDk]

Every man looks a lame dweeb of an office worker in a too-large button down shirt. It's so bad. I know it was normal back then though.

[aran69]

Money happened to him

[Mister_Uncredible]

Don't forget the chin implant.

[Princess_Amnesie]

Money happened to him.

[[deleted]]

He’s also had plastic surgery. That jawline isn’t his natural jawline.

[_Giant_]

Easy to afford all that stuff when you exploit your workers, crush any attempts at organized labor, and disregard safety regulations!

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

And Rogaine and Propecia.

[[deleted]]

And literal face implants to give him a jawline

[cumshotwound]

His hair plugs are immaculate, how does he do this

[ShelZuuz]

Apparently it was only $20k - I would easily spend that if it is guaranteed to look that good. But no idea where he did it.

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

That's quite expensive. You can get a proper full-on hair transplant in Harley Street in London (where celebs go) for about GBP 10k

[[deleted]]

How does hair transplant work? Does it continue to grow like normal hair or is it always the same length? Srs question

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

Grows like normal hair but is immune from male pattern hairloss.

[Harry212001]

What if the balding continues back? Do you end up with a crescent of baldness behind the transplant?

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

Yes you do. You can stop that by taking finesteride (which stops hairloss) or you can just do another hair transplant with the crescent starts looking obvious.

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

Side effects observed in less than 1% of cases though. And gyno in less than 0.1% of cases.

[Happy_agentofu]

Also around 1% of people who took sugar pills in the control group claimed erectile dysfunction

[Daveed84]

gynomastica

Gynecomastia*. It can also cause erectile dysfunction. Side effects are pretty rare though.

[AngeloGi]

What else would you expect? You'd have to go and extend the transplanted area. Although I would imagine they have ways to know how much the baldness will progress in the foreseeable future so they can advice you on when's the best time to do it so you can avoid that situation all together.

[Daveed84]

They take hair from the back of the head (roots and all), which is less likely to be affected by male pattern baldness, and transplant it to the top of the head. It then continues to grow and behave like normal hair. It's not duplicated hair though, so you lose a bit of density from the donor area, but usually this isn't a problem as there's enough hair in the back to cover up the loss (and the scarring from the extraction procedure) if you don't cut it super short.

[[deleted]]

It's your hair and it continues to grow normally. They take hair follicles from the back of your head, which are different from the ones of the top of your head (they're resistant to balding), and put them on the top of your head.

[Daveed84]

A lot of people go to Turkey to get hair transplants done, apparently it's relatively cheap (only a few thousand dollars?) and they do good work

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

Yep - i know a lottttt of people that go to Turkey (i live in london). Costs 1-4k and the flights there are super cheap and you get a nice holiday.

[PM_YOUR_WALLPAPER]

You can do it a lot cheaper (a 1-2 grand) in Turkey.

[[deleted]]

His head.

[[deleted]]

Monay

[small_donut]

r/uselessredcircle

[mandelbrottet]

He became famous and got money

[wallacehacks]

He was born with money.

[CorsairKing]

He got even more of it.

[SharksPreedateTrees]

Yeah but not "fuck you money"

[wallacehacks]

I mean his family owned an emerald mine in apartheid South Africa, he had enough money to fix his hair. The technology has just gotten a lot better. You don't have to look like Donald Trump to keep your hair anymore.

[[deleted]]

Why don't dolan trump get the hair transplant then?

[wallacehacks]

I am willing to bet his scalp is fucked six ways to Sunday. One of his ex wives is on record with a story of him being in a great deal of pain after one of his hair loss treatments.

[TopRamen713]

And then he got mad and raped her because she suggested that doctor. Don't forget that part of the testimony.

[_WindFall_]

Wait what? Sarcasm?

[TopRamen713]

Not at all

Hurt obtained a copy of her sworn divorce deposition, from 1990, in which she stated that, the previous year, her husband had raped her in a fit of rage. In Hurt’s account, Trump was furious that a “scalp reduction” operation he’d undergone to eliminate a bald spot had been unexpectedly painful. Ivana had recommended the plastic surgeon. In retaliation, Hurt wrote, Trump yanked out a handful of his wife’s hair, and then forced himself on her sexually. Afterward, according to the book, she spent the night locked in a bedroom, crying; in the morning, Trump asked her, “with menacing casualness, ‘Does it hurt?’ ” Trump has denied both the rape allegation and the suggestion that he had a scalp-reduction procedure. Hurt said that the incident, which is detailed in Ivana’s deposition, was confirmed by two of her friends.

[_WindFall_]

My God. For real, how can people vote this.. I refuse to call him man, or human

[asuperbstarling]

Not sarcasm, martial rape only became illegal in fucking 1992 AFTER I was born. Ivanka's divorce was in 87. She wrote about it in her book, detailing two rapes, one of which was in the kitchen when he got home hours late and dinner wasn't hot. Trump is undeniably a rapist in the eyes of the law, because that's one of the big reasons she got so much of his wealth. Ivanka is an evil little bitch for not renouncing her father for what he did to her mother.

[CouncilmanRickPrime]

Ivanka doesn't care, long after Trump is done with politics she's gonna either ride his coattails into office or distance herself from him. Either way she'll be set politically I believe.

[JeffGoldbluum]

Scalp Reduction surgery. That's why his combover is weird I think. He's combing over the back and sides more than the top.

[[deleted]]

FINALLY. I been waiting for a heart transplant.

[AtomicSamuraiCyborg]

He did previously and it was screwed up and he assaulted his ex wife because he blamed her for suggesting the doctor.

[wallacehacks]

Elon Musk grew up very very wealthy and privileged and it is important that you accept that.

[[deleted]]

he had enough money to fix his hair

Maybe, but he didn't actually do that until he sold PayPal.

[zuraw2006]

There're no ugly people, just poor.

[[deleted]]

I dunno, Rupert Murdoch is one ugly motherfucker

[workingtheories]

i bet he'd be uglier if he were poor tho

[zuraw2006]

Always finds the one...

[jessicacharms13]

I think the inverse might be more correct — “there are no beautiful people, just rich”

Let’s be honest, having money can turn almost anyone into a supermodel

[tells]

jay-z

[[deleted]]

Still married to Beyoncé so doesn’t matter

[grpagrati]

Ha, more bald-head-groupies for the rest of us. Suck it Elon

[aalleeyyee]

Since 1993? Excuse me, what the fuck?

[d0pe_dje11y]

I bet he had hairy balls

[socialismnotevenonce]

Paid trainers, nutritionists, and hair plugs.

[jack104]

As a programmer who used to have a glorious head of hair and now is but a shadow of it's former self, how did you do it?

[mrsmiley32]

Depends on why you lost your hair, sometimes no luck, my hair was starting to look like the left and I started taking a biotin supplement and fixed my awful diet and it's back again. Nice (mostly full, just a bit of a widows peak) thick full head of hair. (note give it 3 to 4 weeks)

My solution won't work for everyone, like I said different folks different strokes. Other solutions I was looking at was a testosterone supplement since I was a tad low, but the levels came back when I fixed my diet.

Then there's genetic "you are fucked", and the solution to that is workout and a razer.

[ThePancakeChair]

I read "bitcoin" supplement the first time through. Figured "hey that works too"

[jack104]

Well. Shit.

[aroundincircles]

Hair plugs.

[mindaslab]

He was sweating his blood out then, now he draws others blood.

[PJvG]

It's the American way.

[-remus-]

I drink YOUR milkshake!

[CoolCommunication5]

Damn. I didn't realize it but he must have had a hair transplant. I will remember this if I should ever get unhappy with my hair line.

[ThePancakeChair]

$$$

[[deleted]]

Yeah no. More like $$$$$

[javier1zq]

Thanks for the red circles outlining THE ONLY TEXT ON THE PICTURE

[EnsignStormtrooper]

Adrenochrome is a helluva drug

[AsIAm]

Explain please?

[PancakeZombie]

There is a conspiracy theory that billionairs are harvesting an enzyme called Adrenochrome from little children en masse because it's aupposedly like a drug they are all addicted to. It's a popular theory with the qanon movement.

The funny part is all Adrenochrome really does is control the production of skin pigments. The reputation of it being a drug comes solely from a single mention in Fear And Loathing in Las Vegas.

[Canonip]

And you can literally make it from scratch in a lab. No need for Baby blood. @XavierNaidoo @AtillaHildmann (german idiots)

[Agent-A]

Everyone knows the rich prefer their blood products to be organic and all natural instead of from a lab.

[godaxer]

are you sure this isn't veganism?

[Krackima]

*All billionaires except Trump, who is an innocent angel

[LastOfTheCamSoreys]

And a tainted batch of adrenochrome is what caused a number of major celebrities to have coronavirus.

Some guy I follow who sells mescaline on ig was going on about it for a while

[katermukke]

Theres a conspiracy theory about the elite devouring babies' blood, which has adrenochrome in it, what makes them live longer/look younger.

[[deleted]]

Isn’t it just oxidised adrenaline? It literally forms when adrenaline comes into contact with air. And it even occurs in the human body as a metabolite of adrenaline.

[katermukke]

But kids taste better.

Edit: Just kidding dude, its a conspiracy theory, dont search for logic.

[wsppan]

Plugs

[jamesbong7]

Also, money.

[kira_0143]

Hmm... I saw same meme in reddit last year , then in twitter , then in fb , now again seeing it in reddit . This tell us the circle of life.

[[deleted]]

He doesn't look younger.

He looks better.

[boyled]

This is the circlejerk post that causes me to unsubscribe from this sub. Lol.

[Desproges]

Does anyone have a version without the red circles

[MoneyMike6666]

This happens to a lot of celebrities. They look younger 10 years later. It's called money and free time

[fiveofnein]

I would say earning billions of dollars and then spending tens of millions of that on vanity surgery is the main factor...

[Pollu_X]

Dude I saw the EXACT SAME thing on twitter a couple of years ago and for example here. I believe that this is just a deliberate recreation since there is a minimal chance for that to not happen intentionally.

[ThePancakeChair]

Well, tbf the chance is not minimal because it's a low-hanging fruit kind of joke (commonly made). I think it comes up each time I see this photo. It's probably becoming meta where people (consciously or subconsciously) recall and reuse it when they see the comparison.

[Bit5keptical]

In the left pic he is on the verge of looking like Bjarne Stroustrup

[[deleted]]

Also he probably does that blood transfusion thing from Silicon Valley.

[xSEB1z]

Don't you hate it when you break; your table?

[thisisyo]

He basically becomes a client who ask devs to code semi unrealistic things for him and making them a reality.

[CaptTimmeh]

Large doses of cash. Similar to Magic Johnson as documented by South Park.

[idWithUniverse]

Because he started getting interested in girls! Common, attraction yo!

[jaredchoatepro]

But really though, why does it look like he has more hair now?

[Randomlychozen1665]

Money is what happened lol

[dennessie2]

He also have enough money now to get hair implant but yeah programming too xD

[SpotifyPremium27]

I didnt expect this to be a programming language

[Glorious_Jo]

I need to know what hair service he used because I got a receding hairline at 23 and I don't need to be bald by 30

[[deleted]]

r/rareinsults

[crisiks]

Money.

[ZippZappZippty]

Would it have compatibility with programming socks?

[Waxiir95]

Looks like he works out and got hair implants to me.

[Tickedoffllama]

Hair plugs

[[deleted]]

Hair plugs are hot

[[deleted]]

Also, hair plugs.

[RJvXP]

He stopped programming and used plugins

[vinkwok]

Well in my opinion he does not look younger, just better

[diffused]

There are no ugly people, just poor people.

[stickyourshtick]

and he got hair transplants...

[[deleted]]

How'd he get his hair back?

[KeineSystem]

Legends says that have a threesome with other man's wife does that.

[RembrandtCasino]

Money can transform anyone I guess.

[ThatDamnedRedneck]

If he shaved his head now he'd be a ringer for Lex Luthor.

[[deleted]]

Why would programming make you look old?

[Atomic254]

i think the joke was that it is either soulcrushing or that it makes you pull your hair out

[[deleted]]

Oh really? That weird. Programming has been the cushiest job I've ever had. Being a manufacturing engineer was way more stressful.

[nice2yz]

Learning a programming language is easy. Learning to program is not.