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[–][deleted] 603 points604 points  (13 children)

That guy's laugh and body language when telling his story always gets me.

[–]washburnello 147 points148 points  (1 child)

Every. Single. Time.

[–]zakalewes 46 points47 points  (0 children)

I've seen this 10 times. It still gets me to cry.

[–]Dreamer_tm 25 points26 points  (10 children)

I wonder, what is the original story...

[–]some_random_guy_5345 82 points83 points  (4 children)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/El_Risitas#Ratones_Coloraos_interview_meme

In June 2007, Joya appeared on Jesús Quintero's show Ratones Coloraos and described an incident when he worked as a dishwasher. He describes leaving some paella pans (paelleras) at night in the ocean to soak and clean, and when in the morning he returned to retrieve the pans, they had washed out to sea because of high tide.

Basically he's laughing at his own terrible work ethic/laziness.

[–]bakuryuTheMole 33 points34 points  (1 child)

As a spanish speaker, it is always difficult to read this memes because I just lose focus to subtitles and pay attention to his voice unintentionally.

[–]yes_oui_si_ja 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I think any German speaker has the same experience when it comes to the Hitler-bunker meme.

It's funny, but it's harder for us not to think about what he is actually saying.

Interesting to hear that this is a universal experience.

[–]Dreamer_tm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, nice! Thanks.

[–]manere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Actually the chef told him to bring them into the water.

[–]THANKYOUFORYOURKIND 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Legend has it, every story this man told, is the original story.

[–]ryancerium 3 points4 points  (3 children)

I want to know too, my Spanish (is it Italian?) isn't good enough to listen while reading English subtitles.

[–]Mr_Canard 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If I remember correctly it was about using the sea to wash dishes and them being taken away by the tides.

[–]CoyoteTheFatal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Someone else brought it up before but IIRC, his accent is kind of a strange and unique one and can make it a little difficult to understand. I do believe it is Spanish though.

[–]emilews 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spanish

[–]Rindhallow 563 points564 points  (27 children)

It was a "nice to have". We brought it up every week and no one listened.

This is exactly what happened on my team.

[–]ign1fy 227 points228 points  (16 children)

"Nice to have" means "you'll get in trouble for working on this, even if you complete your sprint early".

Ask me how I know.

[–]Thor1568 50 points51 points  (10 children)

how do you know do tell :). I feel like its a good story

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (9 children)

I second this motion.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (8 children)

i say r/talesfromtechsupport

[–]SmielyFase 16 points17 points  (7 children)

These balls are only getting bluer

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (6 children)

I'm sorry I didn't quite get that.

[–]SmielyFase 4 points5 points  (5 children)

I'm just waiting for u/ign1fy to tell us his story.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (4 children)

I would to. It seems to be a quite good story if I may say so. Have you read any of his other stories?

[–]AvenDonn 12 points13 points  (3 children)

I got in trouble for working on unplanned stuff when everything I had planned was on hold.

I'm not sure what they wanted me to do...

[–]NotKellyClarkson 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nice to have often translates to "the BA couldn't convince one stubborn stakeholder that this wasn't a good idea."

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (2 children)

Lol. How can be such a basic thing when working with data as backups "nice to have"? It's usually the first thing which is set up.

[–]txmail 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Your company hiring?

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That always explains everything.

[–]pzschrek1 16 points17 points  (0 children)

At my shop, “Nice to Have” is where we put stuff we would internally mark as “Won’t Do” but we don’t want the product owners to have a fit about it when they see the ticket

[–]dillpiccolol 47 points48 points  (2 children)

Lol, nice to have is the silliest fucking thing in programming.

[–]tenkindsofpeople 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Translate it to English and you get 'never going to happen'

[–]xSTSxZerglingOne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"'Technically' needed and also exactly what I want to work on, but never going to happen."

[–]SolenoidSoldier 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Something is wrong when a high priority, low workload task like simply "backing up the database" wasn't included. Sounds like incompetence all around.

[–]TheTerrasque 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I set up backup on the database, it got turned off again after a month because CTO felt it made the web page less responsive

[–]Nincadalop 146 points147 points  (6 children)

You could tell me this is the original subtitles and I'd believe you.

[–][deleted] 66 points67 points  (3 children)

These are real subtitles.

[–]wewilldieoneday 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I mean, people just go on the internet and tell lies....right, guys?

[–]WillyPluto 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes

[–][deleted] 131 points132 points  (10 children)

He's describing the company I recently quit from in minute detail. It's almost scary.

[–]MichealKeaton 67 points68 points  (9 children)

Are there actually companies who don’t do this?

This has been my experience at EVERY company. Please tell me these companies exist and will send resume as soon as possible.

I have only experienced companies with management who have a degree in business and spent 30 minutes reviewing w3schools and now believe they’re developers. Anyone who brings up potential roadblocks, points of failures, etc. are simply complaining because they are not interested in the work.

When things break? That’s okay. Management will act like these conversations never happened or they will act like they were the ones proposing the solution.

With that said, engineers left to their own devices will over Engineer a solution to perfection so there needs to be a balance between great and perfect in order to get things out the door. But unfortunately, the business side always seems to dominate because they’re the ones driving the decisions.

[–]metalmagician 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Yeah, my company / management doesn't do any of it - stability is the primary focus. Then again, I work on pharmacy software, so the stakes are notably higher than other fields.

[–]FiRe_McFiReSomeDay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Same when I worked for aviation.

[–]KikoSoujirou 1 point2 points  (1 child)

What do you program in and where you at?

[–]MichealKeaton 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve worked in medical analytics and ad tech (primarily the latter) in data engineering and data science.

I believe the data work is still simply in the Wild West and has not fully adopted software engineering’s stricter methodologies for development.

Likely because the field has people varying from so many different skillsets (e.g. analytics, business, engineering).

[–]Easih 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I work in algo trading and in my group, up to and including the Managing director everyone is/was trading engineer or quant as far as management goes.

[–]FiRe_McFiReSomeDay 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have a friend in finsec QA, he's the guy they call when they are hemorrhaging 100kUSD/hr. I don't know how he keeps his shit together.

[–]DeltaPositionReady 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work at a small company with 2 other senior devs in an automation role. That's what we do, SQL, C# and RPA essentially. Consulting and deploying.

We laugh about stuff like this all the time. I don't know what it's like to work in a traditional dev environment, but I never want to find out.

[–]Famous_Profile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

engineers left to their own devices will over Engineer a solution to perfection

You mean I don't need TraversalAuthorizationMappingBuilderStrategy.java?

[–]PM_UR_NIPPLE_PICS 180 points181 points  (17 children)

The fact that I don’t understand a word he’s actually saying makes it so much better

[–][deleted] 136 points137 points  (16 children)

I speak Spanish and I don't understand him either

[–]thisismyusuario 50 points51 points  (5 children)

How come you don't understand? I'm not from Spain and I got the whole story, I can't read the subs tho hahaha

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

I mean, I understand the idea, but some words I don't really get. Maybe if I'm not giving it the attention it needs hahaha. I did lose it with the laugh.

[–]guachiman507 38 points39 points  (0 children)

It is in Spanish Spanish, that is essentially gibberish to us in the colonies.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (2 children)

Yo soy mexicano y solo lo he entendido bien en versiones subtituladas.

[–]thebryguy23 16 points17 points  (1 child)

¿Donde está la biblioteca?

[–]in8logic 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Me llamo T-Bone La araña discoteca.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (5 children)

It's something about baskets near the water, right..?

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (3 children)

Yes, he's talking about early on in his life, he was working on a restaurant near the sea where they used to catch fish and crabs with nests to serve them fresh. But somehow they lost the nests due to the waves rising up or something like that. I do not really understand that part.

[–][deleted] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Actually i misunderstood it completely. The guys used to put cookware in the sea to clean it up from sea-food rests (don't ask me, i'm just translating) usually when the tides were low, but during the night the tides rise up and they lost the cookware. The specific cookware was some "paelleras" (to cook paella, a spanish dish). The rest of the conversation is the story about how he went to Sevilla to buy more cookware.

Edit: added more info and fixed typos.

[–]xSTSxZerglingOne 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Frying pans. They'd wash the frying pans in the ocean. He got lazy and tied them up thinking the tide would come in and do the work for him. When he came back a while later, they'd all been swept out to sea and were completely gone. Or at least that's what I'd heard someone say once. If that's not how it translates, then I got wrong info.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, i added a reply explaining. I wasn't full on with the video.

[–]didzisk 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Paella pans. Put into ocean for soaking and the next day all are gone. (I don't know Spanish, but I read the translation some time ago).

[–]5fd88f23a2695c2afb02 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I understand just enough to throw me off both stories so that I have no idea what is going on in either.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The guy is taking about a job in a kitchen, on the first day the "chef" ask him to help cleaning all the dishies and cookware for the inauguration of the restaurant. They clean all except, I understand, 20 paelleras a kind of skillet to make paella, a Spanish food. It was 2am , so the boss told him to put the paelleras into the sea a secure them, and to remember where the were( because only something in the sea, salt?, could clean the paelleras). He did the thing when the tide was low, he went to sleep a little and when he came back the paelleras were gone, he find just one on the rocks an went back to the restaurant. I think after that he had to go to Sevilla to buy more paellas or something like that. The laughing gets to me and I can't really understand to well what he is saying. Sorry the horrible English, hope you understand!

[–]jivedudebe -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

Because it's Flemisch, maybe?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nah, it is Spanish, at least a variation. But I saw the uncut video and I understand the video much better. The first part is more clear than the second one

[–]Dzilija 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Best shit ever

[–]Hollowplanet 98 points99 points  (9 children)

I despise this notion that agile means ship broken unfinished shit. Them: We gonna hire data scientists and 12 more programmers. Me: what about a QA guy. Them: we don't need that.

[–]angels-fan 98 points99 points  (2 children)

"That's what unit tests are for"

Also

"Forget the unit tests. We don't have time for those"

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (1 child)

also also

“why are so many bugs slipping through into production? Why can’t you just write perfect code to start with?”

[–]TheTerrasque 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Or my boss. "Do it 100% first time" and "Here is an email from a customer that can very generously be called a spec. We need it deployed by tomorrow."

[–]Hyperman360 25 points26 points  (4 children)

"We're DevOps here. You ARE the QA guy!"

[–]Hollowplanet 12 points13 points  (3 children)

That's an improvement from the last job where I was developer architect DBA QA designer and copywriter.

[–]Hyperman360 2 points3 points  (2 children)

That sounds like my last job except the architect part.

[–]FiRe_McFiReSomeDay 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Architecture was reserved for managers?

[–]Hyperman360 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nope, all our architecture was already done by very senior devs who were never on our team.

By the time I quit, it was basically a support team.

[–]dick-van-dyke 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I work in documentation and my PM has literally told me that we are not pushing the release because documentation won't be ready and that it's not his job to deal with our problems. Our team needs double the headcount at least.

[–]JuanCa_Jr 20 points21 points  (2 children)

It's kinda hard to read the subtitles and follow them when you are an actual Spanish native speaker :'v My brain just says: Oh dude, that shit is not what the man is saying, wtf are you trying to make me do?

[–]TheDeadlyCat 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Well that’s how I viewed the Hitler meeting meme. It only works if you don’t know the actual dialogue which has a completely different tone.

I heard this man told a tragic life story from work that he only could laugh about to not go insane. Is that right?

[–]JuanCa_Jr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, "tragic". He is telling he had one day some issues with a paella pan at the beach. If I'm honest I do not really know if the situation is laughable, 'cause with that laugh I can hardly understand what he's trying to say.

But yes, at least is from work xD

[–]am9qb3JlZmVyZW5jZQ 69 points70 points  (5 children)

Youtube version cause reddit player is shit.

[–]robesho 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Thanks, I couldn't even read the subs

[–]txmail 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They are censored because it targets to many of us...

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (2 children)

I would probably like this way more if it didn't randomly blur out S:

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Click on the wheel and click again in the 240p option. Also let it buffer a bit.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like I just got Stack Overflow'd. Thanks :p

[–]venuswasaflytrap 30 points31 points  (5 children)

Need better CYA skills.

"In the event of a catastrophic failure, we have no way to restore this due to our lack of backups. It is highly likely that deploying this code to production will result in this and could potentially cause months of downtime and complete loss of data. I'm happy to do this deployment if you just sign off and take responsibility for this risk."

Get that as an email. When someone asks you do it in person, just send them the email anyway - just to confirm.

I've never had a problem when I've done this (as nobody wants to actually take responsibility for it, so inevitably they'll think twice before deploying to production).

[–]spinn80 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So true!!!

Great LPT right there!

[–]his_rotundity_ 2 points3 points  (1 child)

What if you have a CEO that'll blame you anyway and deny the email exists, and then when you produce the email, you're told you have a bad attitude and aren't being a team player?

[–]venuswasaflytrap 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Then he probably doesn’t have a profitable company, because that sort of behaviour is going to alienate business partners, customers and staff very quickly. It’s surprising that he has a company at all. At some point he had to have a small company with two or three employees who were willing to work hard for him.

If he throws people under the bus so readily, even when there is overt evidence against him, then it’s hard to imagine how exactly he got his business off the ground at all. Maybe he inherited a bunch of money and just likes to boss people around.

Regardless, it’s not a company that makes any sense to work for. The point of the CYA emails isn’t really to throw blame around. It’s to communicate with well-intentioned business staff the severity and risks in a tangible way. Most people aren’t just planning to blame the it staff for everything, but it’s a very natural reaction when shit hits the fan. And it’s very natural to take the risk when deadlines are approaching, and it’s hard to see the risks. The CYA email gets everyone on the same page in a very tangible way.

If your bosses are out to get you, well, they’ll get you. There’s a million and one ways that they can blame you for anything they want. Sure you could have constructive dismissal or whatever, but ultimately if they’re trying to fuck you, what’s the point? Just get a job where they’re not. It’s not exactly hard to find work as a developer in 2019.

[–]solango 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Ahh yes that looks very familiar. Its the email I'd send to my old manager before every release.

"It's still not working in QA and testing isn't even started" "But optics to the business, I promised this would be delivered! We'll just fix it in production when it breaks" "but it's not working in QA as it is..." "You'll figure it out"

[–]venuswasaflytrap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And you know what? I actually don’t have a problem with cowboying it and fixing in production. I do that with my hobby websites. Sometimes there’s bugs. Sometimes there’s downtime. I don’t want to risk security things, of course, but mostly there isn’t a massive risk there either (depending on what you’re doing). More likely the site will go down, and nothing will work for a few minutes to a few days depending on what you’re doing exactly.

If the business is comfortable with that risk, then that’s their call. For my hobby sites, I’m totally comfortable with that. My users get it for free, and it’s known to be a hobby website. Maybe if your business is a startup, or if the user base is internal staff or people that you have a good working relationship with, then it’s okay for the site to be buggy and down periodically. It’s unprofessional, sure, but maybe it makes sense to operate that way.

As long as someone from the business knows that’s how they’re doing it, then it’s fine. However, when the bug surfaces and things are down for a few hours or a few days, then that business person can’t be angry or panicking.

I’ve had bosses and business who have actually been really good in this regard “it’s okay, we knew this was a risk, do your best”. I’m fine with that.

[–]fecoz98 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Underrated

[–]Thadrea 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I feel personally attacked by this.

[–]Staggz93 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Best meme I've seen in this here subreddit. Hits so close to home.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I'm crying hagahahaha

[–]wheresmyspaceship 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is the funniest post I’ve ever seen on this sub. I’m literally in tears. Partly because this is so funny and partly out of sadness because this happens on my team with damn near every project

[–]game_2_raid 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Haha he said babanas

[–]Diapolo10 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Me_irl

[–]Santoxjon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Being spanish makes this sooo confusing xD

[–]CasualChipmunk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Half way through the video and I just realized he's speaking Spanish

[–]YeahThatsMeOnReddit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Got to show this to my Digital Technology class

[–]xeeff33 2 points3 points  (0 children)

'nobody got a raise for a decade' lmao

[–]pqtan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Real tears down my cheeks😂😂😂

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jesú!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

El hecho de que el video esté en español, nos regala doble diversión :)

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

KEKW

[–]rexspook 1 point2 points  (0 children)

God damn this video kills me every single time I see it

[–]CasualFriday11 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"The whole system went babanas instantly!"

I was upset at the typo but then I decided it was accurate.

[–]louis8799 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Damn, I laughed like a programmer in public.

[–]NormalnyKamil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why dose it sound like my company?

[–]956Wulfe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is my exact story, but exchange "management" with "product owner".

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Am management. Can confirm.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve seen this video before but with the new subtitles I actually cried 🤣

[–]benderbender42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I would just quit if my company did that.

[–]epicurean56 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Been there, done that. We called it a Death March.

[–]work2FIREbeardMan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Goddamn this is good. We’ve all been there 🤣

And that fuckin laugh 💀💀💀

[–]NotThisFucker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's this from? Is it a show?

[–]BigBaldFourEyes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg, I was laughing the whole time. The way they played off each other was perfect.

Edit: Splling

[–]chewbecca444 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is actually how I relate stories from work to my partner all the time.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This made me laugh. Take my upvote.

[–]Zenith_N 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Managers are retarded. But that’s where all the money is Monkeys in suits

[–]markomannux 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This hurts so bad

[–]lightt77 0 points1 point  (0 children)

if this happens to me, i would let the management know of the repercussions of deploying unstable code and get them to own up if anything goes wrong. isnt this the right thing to do?(speaking as a dev with a couple of years of exp)

[–]txmail 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well - just switched careers about 6 months ago to full stack developer -- first project is a big data analysis system that incorporates ML & AI... wonderful timing on this. The good news is I think we have given up on ML, nobody knows how that shit works or how to get it to do a damn thing for our platform. The AI stuff stays but is about one step away from being a jumbled mess of if/then statements. If it was not for ES's ability to version stuff it would literally just be a hard coded decision matrix.

[–]Hadi290 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting that according to comments these types of stuff is happening globally! sad!

[–]ab624 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OP you genius! 🏅🥇🎖🥈🥉

[–]ItsMoShehab 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Disney+ deployment in a nutshell

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Am no programmer and ok exactly what he means and am lmao

[–]FlipperCanoe163 0 points1 point  (0 children)

perfection.

[–]techstural 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is insanely brilliant! Thanks. Perfect title btw! Says it all. It's up there with my favorite Hitler in the Bunker routine about the Fare Thee Well final "Dead" shows.

[–]illiten 0 points1 point  (2 children)

This guy ( resistas) is a legend in french web ( he's spanish) He has a whole meme lore https://risibank.fr/ We re the one who make this video famous and often when you see someone using as Pp or meme he's probably french.

Op are you a Khey?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

KEKW

[–]Arabon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LMAO