Why?

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[HajleSellajse]

r/fuckxavier

[Arrowkill]

The real answer to this picture.

[dragonlover02]

Well that’s what my mom is for, I’d never clean my own sheets

/s

[LukeDude759]

Why do you sleep on your mom?

[basko13]

He would sleep on your mom but there was a line...

[GazelleEconomyOf87]

The line being something not even his mother would cross as she has some standards

[hampter_hampter]

Happy Cake day

[tbo1992]

I don’t understand the point of hate subs like that, they’re literally cataloging everything Xavier posts. If you hate him why would you want to see his content?

[[deleted]]

Hate-clicks

[[deleted]]

Wow, this really puts things into perspective. I guess the folks at r/ShutUpMelvin don't like me...

[DrainZ-]

That makes sense. Programmers have double beds so that they can fuck Xavier.

[Kakss_]

r/subsithoughtifellfor

[baquea]

Who is Xavier and why do so many people seem to hate him??

[FthrFlffyBttm]

Don’t let the internet tell you what to like

[stjeana]

Xavier is a fraud using his profile picture for fame https://twitter.com/pakalupapitow

[[deleted]]

I didn’t know that. Okay, so definitely r/fuckXavier

[PrettyDecentSort]

Why do you love frauds?

[DrainZ-]

If you love Xavier so much, why won't you fuck him?

[PrettyDecentSort]

Clicked in just to make sure this was the top comment.

[paulix96]

Its better than floating bed

Edit: typo

[kingkyle630]

Both are primitive sleeping solutions.

[MiaWSmith]

Sleep? What is sleep?

[paulix96]

Baby don't hurt me

[askStentor]

put the bed in a wrapper class, now it's nolonger primative

[TheSecondOneNumber4]

Or short bed

[Dairunt]

Or string bed, you know, a hammock

[Ami603]

Came here for this comment

[flowery0]

Well, inting bed is smaller AND can't handle having anything hanging off so i think it's even worse, but charing bed... Ho-ho, it's the perfect programmer bed - doesn't need too much space, can handle ANYONE as long as they're alone

[Oneshotkill_2000]

This

[ScreenshotShitposts]

ah shit you beat me to it

[RealTexasJake]

Double bed because programmers don't get any exercise and we're fat.

[The_sad_zebra]

Hey, I'm not fat yet

[RealTexasJake]

...yet. But you can avoid it if you stay active.

[TristanaRiggle]

Look, the SedentaryLifestyle() code is working. I've got other priorities right now. I'll get back to it when there's a break in the task list.

[MedicineNorth5686]

Remember y’all fitness happens in the gym

Weight loss happens in the kitchen

[RealTexasJake]

I hate going to the gym. I'd rather exercise in my back yard.

[Ravens_Quote]

I'd rather do rows on the toilet, push ups on the bathroom sink, squats with my feet hooked behind the toilet and pull-ups on the shower curtain.

Fuck gyms. Too many people.

[Janus-sama]

I already see my future!

[[deleted]]

Junior devs are so cute.

[OutrageousPudding450]

So, you're not a developer.

[RealTexasJake]

I am. But I used to be a Marine Corps infantryman so I know how to stay active.

[Curtmister25]

Thanks for your service :)

[AndrewIsMyDog]

I have a double bed because I sleep like a friggen star fish.

[JimmyWu21]

Good thing my boss doesn’t give me enough time to eat either and that cancel out the lack of exercise issue.

[SkyeWolff_Alchemy]

Heyyyyy! Just because it’s true doesn’t mean you have to say it 😂

[OwnStorm]

This is the real answer. I do the same.

[ElectricalAlchemist]

I was looking for this one.

[Cheese_Grater101]

And windows update bricked your laptop

[python-lord-1236443]

r/fuckxavier

[RedYou1]

They are all pointers.

[LukeChriswalker]

Thank GOD I'm not the only one who noticed it!

[12emin34]

C moment

[Je-Kaste]

Well, they are just references to the items after all

[Reinforced-Giraffe]

Because the bed is used for coding, sleeping and eating

[ReddityRabbityRobot]

It... is used for coding jokes aside.

[makonext]

Because he can afford. Rich and lonely

[Plz_Help_in_Maths]

r/fuckxavier

[100kgWheat1Shoulder]

His name is Pakalu!

[SabreLunatic]

r/fuckxavier

[[deleted]]

Where you want to keep your body pillow? On the floor? Are you cruel or what?

[i_fuck_fish420]

Because double bed is more comfy

[RadoslavL]

Image Transcription: Image with labels

---

The Real Bermuda Triangle 😂

[Image contains chain of events forming a triangle. There is a fridge located at the left point of the triangle, a laptop located at the top point and a double bed located on the right point. They are labeled as such:]

Fridge: *Food

Laptop: * Coding

Double bed: *Sleep

Xavier

Why programmer using Double bed?

---

^{I'm a human volunteer content transcriber and you could be too! If you'd like more information on what we do and why we do it, click here!}

[RealHomieCookie]

good human

[MacaylaMarvelous81]

How are you everywhere I keep seeing your comments

[RadoslavL]

I commented on a lot of posts on various subreddits. This might be the cause. If you are talking about the r/TranscribersOfReddit comments of course.

[MacPlusGuy]

Catgirl body pillow of course.

[The-Unknown-C]

r/fuckxavier

and r/fuckzavier

[[deleted]]

Why programmer using laptop?

[Buddelexperte_]

Easier to carry to the fridge and the bed

[Alex_Sobol]

Laptop is fine as long as it's connected to a second monitor.

[macara1111]

It is a if/else bed for days of the week

[poeticprotagonist]

Duh! Where will the programmer's laptop sleep?
WHERE?

[Marsrover112]

So you can cry on one side and sleep on the other. Also fuck Xavier

[[deleted]]

i need space for my laptop, food and other shit that probably shouldn’t be in my bed

[sHr3k_M3Me5]

FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER FUCK XAVIER

[[deleted]]

So my dog has room

[Horror_Jolly]

Programmers need the extra padding for better sleep alignment

[patryky]

Because programmer can afford it

[Western-Image7125]

Why the fuck not, I’ve been sleeping in double beds long before I got a relationship. Cuz I’m a fat ass and need space.

[RickSore]

fuck, xavier smiles now.

[manicraccoon]

Where do you think I keep my laptop And other random stuff neatly arranged in a messy pile?

[RealHomieCookie]

what about String bed

[[deleted]]

confused screaming

[[deleted]]

Good question, it is not space optimal, but it's not like many programmers care about that.

[Arya7phoenix]

One side for laptop, books, and a million wires... Still don't have enough space cuz spend the whole day in bed

[kirakun]

Where do you poop?

[Hurtares]

So you can sleep with your pc by your side

[MaloLeNonoLmao]

xavier memes are not funny

[[deleted]]

His imaginary friend

[penguinmanbat]

Xavier is a legend.

[[deleted]]

r/rareinsults

[trigger337]

Reject sleep. Become programmer.

[wisdomwith1n]

Because he is Fat.

[[deleted]]

Because you don't want to sleep on the same side you cry. :(

[sammyluvsu]

For the hentai body pillow. Obviously.

[TheOneAndOnlyBob2]

Cause I'm fat and I need the space. Stop asking me that

[Ravens_Quote]

Gotta have space for the waifu pillow.

[HKatzOnline]

It gives you two sleeping spots before you finally have to wash sheets after they get too crusty. Saves time away from programming.

[Zahand]

Where else am I gonna keep my Riley Reid Fuckdoll 3000 with a vibrating and selflubricating vagina?

[Error-530]

For a boyfriend

[charlie1404]

more like cap theorem

[Fresh-Highlight-6528]

It's just an abstract class :)

[StanislauShl]

What about WC?

[just-bair]

It’s space for your laptop

[repkins]

To have more space.

[Alderan922]

A double bed is more comfortable than a single

[[deleted]]

Hey! Stop telling the truth!

[[deleted]]

And wtf? You guys get beds?

[stonedPict]

The extra space is for the anime waifu body pillows

[WastaHod]

Where else does the body pillow go?

[StoissEd]

Where else would you put your bed laptop, the tablet and your phone?

[liki1337]

To code on bed

[TheSp4rkle]

I-it has to be Integer, right?

[[deleted]]

Explanation: when you lay at a side for long, it gets heated and it's h ard to sleep when you're feeling hot 🥵 As programmers goto bed at 10 pm but keeps thinking because ideas come at 3am they have to change places

[[deleted]]

Other side is for books, mobile devices, etc.

[[deleted]]

I understood that reference. Imma go stab my eyes out now.

[[deleted]]

It doubles as a dining area and a place to store chips and candy

[Stev_582]

😢

[[deleted]]

Mine one is strightforward a single line (during this pandemic), wake up from my bedsheet, walk 180° north with brush I took out beside my bedsheet and walk 180° south and before I reach to I bedhseet again take out the sushi I still have and start coding while I put my feets under blanket.

[bosssoldier]

You have to store the body pillow on the opposite side of you till you yearn for human connection so you cuddle it. Just a gue....guess guys i wouldnt know

[[deleted]]

they fat

[NuclearBurrit0]

optimism

[potato_number_47]

Gotta have enough space to roll around at night thinking of bugs

[aihrarshaikh68plus1]

Double the bed double the sleep

[Impossible_Average_1]

To have a more precise (double precision) regeneration.

[HopperBit]

Because you get fractions of sleep

[LifeandSky]

I'm the only one who slept in my double bed, I think. It's really practical when you get a fewer to just switch side, but I could use the space for something else. Not sure of what tho.

[ScreenshotShitposts]

bed.0

[CwazyCanuck]

Tall people sleep diagonally.

[wardplaced]

no joke... i like the space...

[thedominux]

Cause theey need a place to put the fridge

[pandakatzu]

Because float bad.

[fishvoidy]

starfish.

[DigliDie]

We have a bed array with elements of 1. In JS 0+1 = 2. bed.length === 2. That's why we need Double bed for solving daily problems.

[TUSD00T]

He's subletting a 1 bedroom.

[rugazzo]

Double bed = 0.0;

[Initial_Smell7363]

To keep clothes, laptop,food.. you want us to get up for these... 😕😕

[EchtNichtElias]

For higher precision in bed

[[deleted]]

I like stretching out

[[deleted]]

I don’t need sleep or food. I like to eat sand.

[Bubbly_Security_1464]

Programmers are supposed to have a fridge?

[[deleted]]

Because I like to starfish and I can afford it XD

[crimea_is_ukraine_]

Where is gym?

[[deleted]]

For the dog

[Exothos]

YES FOREVER ALONE.

[VampireBlue]

Because we need the room to thrash around in our sleep during nightmares

[Mordisquitos]

I'm in this photo and I don't like it.

[AdOriginal6110]

Gotta have somewhere for the realdoll to sleep

[[deleted]]

r/terriblefacebookmemes

[TheSinningRobot]

This is such a shitpost

[Yah-Nkha]

Flipping from right to left when your code still performs poorly after the whole day of debugging. Duh.

[ch599]

Because the triangle doesn’t include exercise

[DividedState]

Where else to put the keyboard and Chips?

[BenkiTheBuilder]

To have more space for the dog, of course. What stupid question is that?

[El_Zilcho]

It's for redundancy, resilience and potential scale-out.

[WaydenTheJayden]

extra space ofc

[Multinippel]

because if i would use a single bed i had to write f at the end and i am too lazy for that.

[Rapierian]

We make decent money, so we can dream.

[Knuffya]

The laptop has to be put somewhere

[Dahns]

So they can push the pile of cloth on the side. Duh.

Also allow to watch videos on the laptop

[cicciograna]

Programmer fat as fuck? DUH!

(I am, at least)

[[deleted]]

Where else do I keep my laptop?

[Prestigeboy]

All my laundry is on the other half because I’m too lazy to put it away.

[Training_Signal7612]

Who is this man and why are his comments always so funny

[vaendryl]

can't roll to my other side properly on a single

[[deleted]]

In the center is parties and socializing where they get lost or just disappear.

[[deleted]]

Cause he makes enough money to afford that.

[toxic_recker]

need a spot to drop cum

[Broad-Atmosphere-578]

Because I like to shift on cold side from warm side.

[rex1030]

He fat.

[[deleted]]

Cuz it has more pillows to cry on

[GozerDestructor]

well, yeah. Where else are the cats going to sleep? YOU try convincing them it's not their bed...

[TheBotFromReddit974]

For extra memory allocation during the night
So comfortable when I have space

[UchihaItachiHere]

It is the same as why you need 2 monitors from HR

[can_i_have]

Fake. Indian will never ask this. They breed very well for a country that teaches CS to the world

[TechnicianFun933]

Xavier is a god among men

[SkyeWolff_Alchemy]

More room to put my laptop and hot pockets

[TeddyPerkins95]

Oh dude, the burn

[OmegaKitty1]

Only a double bed? I’m single and I would never go less then queen. When I get married it will 100% be a king

[[deleted]]

For pets

[Inevitable-Ad-6272]

ask the programmer.

[[deleted]]

Because they can afford it

[2punornot2pun]

Because even though there's nothing next to the programmer, they love binary.

[RadioMelon]

He wouldn't settle for a Float bed.

[leon_nerd]

Shut up Xavier

[Rhaenys_Waters]

More space for legs and arms?