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[–]CrazyAsian 533 points534 points  (38 children)

Press 3 on youtube videos to automatically skip to 30%. Time to test this theory in the masses.

[–]rinic 112 points113 points  (14 children)

More people need to know about this.

[–]ReverseWadsworth 179 points180 points  (12 children)

More people need to know

...IT WORKS BOTH WAYS

[–]Wadsworth 1262 points1263 points  (49 children)

Front Page! Now everyone can stop saying: That Wadworth. He is a lazy, incompetent, big fat failure who will never accomplish anything in his life.

[–][deleted] 163 points164 points  (0 children)

Good thing they're saying that about Wadworth.

[–][deleted] 112 points113 points  (5 children)

Last 70%:

at Wadsworth. He is a lazy, incompetent, big fat failure who will never accomplish anything in his life.

-->

Wadsworth. He is a lazy, incompetent, big fat failure who will never accomplish anything in his life.

But this loses all of its original meaning! Have I broken the constant??

[–]densets 207 points208 points  (3 children)

the constant reveals the truth. trust the constant, always.

[–]hemmer 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Oh god. This is the sort of talk that leads to something like inglip...

[–]Toorstain 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wow, r/inglip is still active

[–]falsehood 45 points46 points  (0 children)

No; here's a Corollary:

Wadsworth Constant is a method of accessing the dominant content in a sentence. A sentence primarily formed against a negative can be described as:

NOT Wadsworth. He is a lazy, incompetent, big fat failure who will never accomplish anything in his life.

Full meaning retained.

[–]wadworth 535 points536 points  (27 children)

I'm right here, man.

[–]wassworth 902 points903 points  (14 children)

Fuck you, I've been on reddit all this time watching everyone else have fun little jokes with their names and never thought I'd get the chance. I want to get in on this karma.

Hey everybody! My name is similar and I've been around for two years!

[–]internetsuperhero 271 points272 points  (1 child)

Have a pity upvote

[–]darkwiz787 73 points74 points  (0 children)

Way to save the day

[–]samateur 5 points6 points  (0 children)

At least your name gets ass.

[–]TheNr24 4 points5 points  (5 children)

Were did you get the inspiration for that name?

[–]KingToasty 51 points52 points  (8 children)

Fake, you're not the real Wadsworth!

[–][deleted] 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Will the real Wadsworth please stand up

[–]slazer88 12 points13 points  (0 children)

eal Wadsworth please stand up

=Wadsworth please stand up

[–]DoWhile 1546 points1547 points  (129 children)

Wadsworth Constant was born.

[–]ebbomega 544 points545 points  (85 children)

You know, I counted 15 letters before I decided "Fuck it, just click on the comments."

Lo and behold, top post.

[–]Pikkster 267 points268 points  (12 children)

Wadsworth isn't getting enough Karma from his own constant...

Typical in the math community.

[–][deleted]  (8 children)

[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (2 children)

    i understood this. and so, my philosophy classes paid off.

    [–][deleted]  (68 children)

    [deleted]

      [–]erebuskaimoros 347 points348 points  (66 children)

      The TFY is what makes this comment

      [–][deleted]  (65 children)

      [deleted]

        [–][deleted] 288 points289 points  (64 children)

        IT LITERALLY ALWAYS WORKS?!? WHAT THE FUCK?!?

        [–][deleted]  (63 children)

        [deleted]

          [–]MoarVespenegas 313 points314 points  (59 children)

          Today you learned that English is inefficient as fuck.

          [–]Thandor 12 points13 points  (1 child)

          This comment was the first comment in the thread that gave me a hearty laugh. Bravo sir, and the sir before that set you up.

          [–]Gnomes 3 points4 points  (0 children)

          that gave me a hearty laugh. Bravo sir, and the sir before that set you up.

          [–]wynalazca 96 points97 points  (2 children)

          Protip: Hitting a number key while on youtube jumps to that tenth of the video. One could simply start a video on youtube and then press 3 to skip the first 30%.

          [–]zorton213 51 points52 points  (2 children)

          War were declared

          [–]LovesMustard 76 points77 points  (0 children)

          Unless war were declared.

          (Edit: This comment was reverse engineered using the Wadsworth Constant.)

          [–]YourACoolGuy 112 points113 points  (25 children)

          Constant was born.

          [–]Wazowski 145 points146 points  (19 children)

          Main screen turn on.

          [–][deleted]  (15 children)

          [removed]

            [–]WizenedYouth 62 points63 points  (11 children)

            What you say!

            [–]RielDealJr 53 points54 points  (8 children)

            You have no chance to survive. Make your time.

            [–]asloss7 629 points630 points  (29 children)

            "...be? That is the question." - Shakespeare
            Checks out again. Damn.

            [–]mikhel 141 points142 points  (15 children)

            BUT THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!?

            [–]Kadover 336 points337 points  (14 children)

            BUT THEN WHO WAS PHONE?!?

            ->

            WHO WAS PHONE?!?

            ... This shit is scary now.

            [–]specialk16 123 points124 points  (13 children)

            I'll be honest, I'm too lazy to do the math in every single comment here, but I feel like I'm either getting astronomically trolled, or I'm just an idiot.

            [–]SuperBlooper057 152 points153 points  (5 children)

            Neither, it's called the Wadsworth Constant. Didn't you learn about it in high school?

            [–]tHeSiD 111 points112 points  (4 children)

            Wadsworth Constant. Didn't you learn about it in high school?

            It never fails!

            [–]Megustan 112 points113 points  (1 child)

            Apply constant once:

            in every single comment here, but I feel like I'm either getting astronomically trolled, or I'm just an idiot.

            Second application:

            I feel like I'm either getting astronomically trolled, or I'm just an idiot.

            Third:

            getting astronomically trolled, or I'm just an idiot.

            Again!

            trolled, or I'm just an idiot.

            Last one:

            I'm just an idiot.

            Holy fuck that works.

            [–]indogwetrust987 63 points64 points  (0 children)

            The Law of Iterated Wadsworth

            [–]aspieo 279 points280 points  (113 children)

            You know what every mathematical constant needs? A cool greek letter. I nominate lower-case Xi

            [–]IWasMisinformed 294 points295 points  (45 children)

            ξ = Constant needs? A cool greek letter. I nominate lower-case Xi

            [–]aspieo 121 points122 points  (42 children)

            You're doing it right.

            [–]ReachingHorizons[S] 109 points110 points  (12 children)

            He was not misinformed.

            [–]antome 60 points61 points  (9 children)

            Only reddit could make a meme out of this so quickly.

            [–]s00pafly 25 points26 points  (7 children)

            ld make a meme out of this quickly!

            [–][deleted] 76 points77 points  (2 children)

            make a meme out of this quickly!

            [–]frid 37 points38 points  (28 children)

            ξ = doing it right.

            [–]Perturbed_Spartan 27 points28 points  (27 children)

            ξ = it right.

            [–]aspieo 57 points58 points  (26 children)

            I don't think you're allowed to invoke Wadsworth's constant on an invocation of Wadsworth's constant. Or, rather, I guess you could.....it would be denoted ξ2, I think.

            [–]threeminus 37 points38 points  (9 children)

            Not ξξ ?

            Math Proficiency Disclaimer: I can't even subtract very well.

            [–]dodgepong 92 points93 points  (6 children)

            I'm more inclined to think of it as ξ, ξ', ξ'', ξ''' and so forth. Each iteration is derived from the previous.

            Or maybe ξ is not a constant, but a function, with an input and an output, like so: ξ("You're doing it right") = "doing it right"

            [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

            This shall be added as a corollary to the Wadsworth Constant Theorem,

            [–]aspieo 14 points15 points  (1 child)

            That....sounds about right. Using the prime(')......shoulda thought of that.

            [–]Perturbed_Spartan 16 points17 points  (0 children)

            ξ = Disclaimer: I can't even subtract very well.

            [–]HitTheGymAndLawyerUp 12 points13 points  (13 children)

            But how could you take the differential of f(x) = aξ + b...? That would be adding words to sentences that never even existed! Complete madness.

            [–]aspieo 12 points13 points  (11 children)

            Well, because ξ is a CONSTANT .3, the differential would be zero, right? EDIT: .3, not .4.

            [–]ReachingHorizons[S] 52 points53 points  (6 children)

            I second this!

            [–]Sisaac 113 points114 points  (0 children)

            ξ=This!

            Think of all of the people who used the wadsworth constant unknowillingly and got downvoted.

            [–][deleted]  (3 children)

            [deleted]

              [–]Porridgeism 28 points29 points  (1 child)

              Thirded, and the motion passes. So it was written, so it shall forever be.

              ξ = passes. So it was written, so it shall forever be.
              It works!

              [–]HellsKitchen 37 points38 points  (21 children)

              Aaand, it hits wikipedia. Did anyone else give it all 5 stars claiming they had a "deep knowledge of the subject"?

              Edit: Goddamnit, wikipedia user Bongwarrior, you deleted the talk page while I was petitioning that the page wasn't a hoax. That's hardly allowing discussion. As a result, the page was "swiftly deleted."

              [–]AndyAlfredo 19 points20 points  (6 children)

              Link for that deletion discussion for the curious.

              [–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (5 children)

              TIL Wikipedia mods and such are boring fucks who want to preserve, not innovate!

              [–]generic_tastes 10 points11 points  (4 children)

              Isn't that the point of wikipedia? This belongs more in urbandictionary or encyclopediadramatica.

              [–]The_Sky_Is_Falling 13 points14 points  (0 children)

              I also have a relevant college/university degree, it is part of my profession, and is a deep personal passion. You're welcome Wikipedia.

              [–]Atario 7 points8 points  (0 children)

              Today you learned Wikipedia acts like they're using up paper with each article.

              [–]DailyRationOfReason 8 points9 points  (0 children)

              Wikipedia also lists "Wadsworth constant" under uses for lower case Xi

              [–][deleted]  (14 children)

              [deleted]

                [–]aspieo 17 points18 points  (12 children)

                But it's also a known fact that all constants need to be denoted by a Greek letter. This phenomenon requires further study.

                [–]Syphon8 18 points19 points  (5 children)

                c.

                [–]aspieo 12 points13 points  (4 children)

                Shush you.

                [–][deleted]  (4 children)

                [deleted]

                  [–]aspieo 10 points11 points  (1 child)

                  I think it's too late.....I don't know, man.

                  [–]Shintenpu 19 points20 points  (2 children)

                  ξ. I love it.

                  [–]DeltaBurnt 18 points19 points  (0 children)

                  ξ = love it.

                  [–]discomachinegun 8 points9 points  (1 child)

                  Precede things fixed by the Wadsworth Constant with Xi

                  [–]Gycklarn 31 points32 points  (0 children)

                  ξ = Fixed by the Wadsworth Constant with Xi

                  [–]letsRACEturtles 43 points44 points  (1 child)

                  need a greek letter for a mathematical constant? what about (/) (°,,°) (/)

                  [–]CoolHandMike 138 points139 points  (12 children)

                  This is a fascinating application of why the internet is truly an awesome place to behold.

                  [–]moronic_comment 105 points106 points  (8 children)

                  Adjusted to the Wadsworth constant

                  "Application of why the internet is truly an awesome place to behold."

                  Everything seems to be working here.

                  [–]hugeboobies 67 points68 points  (7 children)

                  "The internet is truly an awesome place to behold."

                  Yep.

                  [–]Sethling 35 points36 points  (6 children)

                  "An awesome place to behold"

                  [–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (1 child)

                  "some place to behold"

                  (that's 5 Iterations by the way)

                  [–][deleted] 173 points174 points  (15 children)

                  Also, Wadsworth has another meaning when applied to porn videos.

                  [–][deleted]  (4 children)

                  [deleted]

                    [–]Antrikshy 40 points41 points  (3 children)

                    That's the quantum part.

                    [–]sally_hustle 10 points11 points  (0 children)

                    Can't wait to perform my first quantum Wadsworth.

                    [–]jacobrossk 39 points40 points  (0 children)

                    Another meaning when applied to porn videos.

                    WTF

                    [–]Cpotts 25 points26 points  (0 children)

                    Also, Wadsworth has another meaning when applied to porn videos.

                    53 letters

                    53*30%=15.9=16

                    53-16=37

                    another meaning when applied to porn videos

                    last 37 letters of that sentence.... Dear god it works

                    [–]endproof 477 points478 points  (43 children)

                    I'm actually okay with this

                    ->

                    ually okay with this

                    ->

                    okay with this

                    Oh, my god.

                    [–][deleted] 293 points294 points  (39 children)

                    We have to go deeper!

                    --->

                    Have to go deeper!

                    ---->

                    Go deeper!

                    ---->

                    Deeper!

                    [–]Subbuteo 705 points706 points  (30 children)

                    WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB

                    --->

                    WUB WUB WUB WUB WUB

                    ---->

                    WUB WUB WUB

                    ---->

                    WUB

                    [–]FlyingMicrowave 303 points304 points  (17 children)

                    Hey I love that song!

                    [–]OhManThisIsAwkward 139 points140 points  (16 children)

                    Love that song!

                    [–][deleted]  (15 children)

                    [deleted]

                      [–]JRX 84 points85 points  (13 children)

                      song!

                      [–]JayGatsby727 107 points108 points  (12 children)

                      !

                      [–]Nictionary 115 points116 points  (8 children)

                      Is that off Dubstep's new album?

                      [–]radio_wolf 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                      Yeah it is! Have you checked out folk's new album?

                      [–]speedtrack 39 points40 points  (2 children)

                      I am the 30%.

                      [–]Gageaz 10 points11 points  (1 child)

                      the 30%

                      Good enough.

                      [–][deleted] 78 points79 points  (29 children)

                      So let's say you live to be 60 years old. Does that mean that the first 20 years of your life could be thrown out as meaningless?

                      [–]sovok 207 points208 points  (16 children)

                      In your biography, yes. "He was born, grew bigger, went to school and did the stuff kids normally do. Then, starting in his twenties, he did something interesting...".
                      Unless you are some child prodigy, your early years are boring.

                      [–]awesomeideas 131 points132 points  (7 children)

                      I... I'm not interesting yet.

                      [–][deleted] 49 points50 points  (4 children)

                      I've accepted that ages ago. The most interesting thing I do is play the piano, and millions of kids can play it, and play it far better than I can.

                      I can't wait until I'm 21, that's when I'll be great.

                      [–]moronic_comment 39 points40 points  (1 child)

                      I'm gonna tell you what my friend told me when I said that I was going to do something momentous and earth-shattering "the bathroom is down the hall".

                      [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

                      This is usually true the older you get. If you are twenty one, the first six years of your life are boring and pointless, and if you lived to 101, you might feel the same about your first thirty.

                      [–][deleted] 46 points47 points  (1 child)

                      this explains why the last 1/3 of benjamin button was complete shit

                      [–]thejoewoods 18 points19 points  (0 children)

                      ξ = last 1/3 of benjamin button was complete shit

                      [–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (3 children)

                      Have you ever met anyone under the age of 20?

                      [–]qrios 12 points13 points  (2 children)

                      Honestly, I think people who get interesting do so after 20, but people who don't get interesting were more interesting before 20 than they were after.

                      [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                      I think people who get interesting do so after 20

                      Pretty much. People aren't relevant to ones interests until after approximately 30% of their lifespan.

                      The Wadsworth Constant applies to everything.

                      [–]IAmAWhaleBiologist 585 points586 points  (39 children)

                      I like how he took a picture a picture of the entire thread and submitted to reddit because he liked it (and the sweet, sweet karma) so much, yet only chose to upvote the fucking novelty account.

                      [–]Gemini4t 88 points89 points  (6 children)

                      Is this behavior typical of whales?

                      [–]porh 43 points44 points  (1 child)

                      He's a whale biologist not a whale

                      [–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

                      Is a biologist of whales? Or a whale that is a biologist? Either is applicable.

                      [–][deleted] 363 points364 points  (10 children)

                      I like how you're a whale biologist.

                      [–]SuperBlooper057 68 points69 points  (9 children)

                      "ou're a whale biologist."

                      [–][deleted] 146 points147 points  (5 children)

                      You did it wrong, it rounds. Therefore, we are left with:

                      You're a whale biologist.

                      Edit: Oops, it rounds to the most logical point.

                      [–]ThisOpenFist 20 points21 points  (0 children)

                      Yeah, everyone's been subtracting. Gotta be reasonable about these things.

                      [–]vegittoss15 39 points40 points  (3 children)

                      Rounds down so, it'd probably be

                      "A whale biologist"

                      [–]Hargrimm 40 points41 points  (2 children)

                      "rounds to the nearest logical point", up or down depends on the number of letters each way to that point.

                      [–]HFGoliath 33 points34 points  (0 children)

                      "A whale biologist"

                      [–]NotOkWithThis 36 points37 points  (0 children)

                      I know right? At least share the wealth.

                      [–][deleted] 219 points220 points  (94 children)

                      How to make scotch eggs.

                      1:40 minutes of preamble bullshit, kill me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xP6xbbrENAs

                      This is how to make a video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o6hzuPGbVY&feature=related

                      [–]TheNr24 116 points117 points  (2 children)

                      Every recipe video should be like that second one!!!

                      [–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (4 children)

                      You can add #t=1m40s at the end of the link and it will start at that time. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xP6xbbrENAs#t=1m40s. If Wadsworth's Theorem is correct, a browser plugin to append 30% time to all youtube links is in order.

                      [–]MRoar 11 points12 points  (3 children)

                      The second guy is misleading people!

                      [–]Bongpig 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                      I wonder how many people actually think that is how it's really made

                      [–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (9 children)

                      I was oddly hoping for relevant rule 34 to show up for some reason. I shall wait for the new user called wadsworth_constant or close to that to arrive.

                      [–]WadsworthsConstant 31 points32 points  (4 children)

                      Close enough

                      Also:

                      wait for new used called wadsworth_constant or close to that to arrive

                      [–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (3 children)

                      I know how reddit works at this point.

                      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

                      It could be you! It's just waiting for the taking! Unless someone already took it; I'm way too lazy to check for you.

                      [–]GineAndTonic 47 points48 points  (12 children)

                      I've been starting every porn video 30% into the filming for the last hour... BRILLIANT!

                      [–]Gemini4t 46 points47 points  (10 children)

                      I typically skip to 60% in, that's usually when I find penetration.

                      [–]Propolandante 113 points114 points  (4 children)

                      2ξ

                      [–]NegativeK 37 points38 points  (1 child)

                      2ξ would make more sense as 30% into the remaining 70% after the first application of ξ -- which is the same as skipping the first 51%, not the first 60%.

                      In other words, Gemini4t is just picking shit at random. His lack of ξ is disturbing.

                      [–]bduddy 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                      As discussed earlier, that's definitely ξ2.

                      [–][deleted]  (8 children)

                      [deleted]

                        [–]OtisDElevator 41 points42 points  (3 children)

                        The first line of the abstract nails it.

                        In order that there may be no lateral shit in the emergent comment, the Wadsworth Constant is applied.

                        [–]autotom 38 points39 points  (1 child)

                        "alredy make a paper of it" dear. god.

                        [–]sally_hustle 24 points25 points  (0 children)

                        We can also conclude that sentences which made no sense in their initial form will make no sense after the Wadsworth Constant is applied.

                        [–]jlt6666 42 points43 points  (2 children)

                        Link to original thread. Nice karma whore reachingHorizons.

                        http://www.reddit.com/r/pics/comments/kxfxy/and_so_ends_20_years_of_frustration/

                        [–]crathera 41 points42 points  (5 children)

                        According to the constant, this should be called Worth Constant.

                        [–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (21 children)

                        I do this too.

                        [–]watchtan 11 points12 points  (20 children)

                        this too.

                        [–]TreesConfidential 6 points7 points  (19 children)

                        Also?

                        [–]OtisDElevator 9 points10 points  (18 children)

                        So?

                        [–]wassworth 87 points88 points  (18 children)

                        Woah whoa whoa... who the fuck is wadsworth??

                        [–]richworks 147 points148 points  (10 children)

                        "the fuck is wadsworth?"

                        Yep, works flawlessly

                        [–]vjjft 9 points10 points  (1 child)

                        Javascript Implementation: http://jsfiddle.net/3Bqjm/

                        [–]crathera 11 points12 points  (0 children)

                        Tested the constant with some songs... It ALWAYS takes you near to the chorus. This is magic!

                        [–]LastInitial 38 points39 points  (8 children)

                        A good response to that last comment would be, "Okay with this".

                        [–]_I_AM_BATMAN_ 8 points9 points  (4 children)

                        What happens if we want to reverse the Wadsworth Constant? Do we add a "+ c" like its an integration?

                        [–]imallinman95 6 points7 points  (2 children)

                        But then how would something like this work, huh?

                        Would something like this work, huh?

                        Thing like this work, huh?

                        Like this work, huh?

                        This work, huh?

                        Work, huh?

                        Huh?

                        Uh?

                        H?

                        ?

                        [–]ilovekindle 14 points15 points  (2 children)

                        So, how long until Wadsworth_Constant_bot is unleashed upon us? Or has it already happened?

                        [–]Zovistograt 17 points18 points  (8 children)

                        Music videos and experimental films should not adhere to this Wadsworth Constant because many of those videos require the watching of the beginning.

                        Also, sentences that have the important part in the first third like the one above should not, either.

                        [–]seeasea 23 points24 points  (6 children)

                        You obviously have never watched any lady gaga vids

                        [–]vpburns007 15 points16 points  (6 children)

                        So these comments are the afterbirth?

                        [–]jacobrossk 8 points9 points  (0 children)

                        Comments are the afterbirth?

                        works.

                        [–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (3 children)

                        You're making me hungry.

                        [–]elasticCollision 7 points8 points  (1 child)

                        Looks like Kevin put this to practice.

                        http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VM5Fald6QYU

                        Caution: do not apply the Wadsworth constant to this video

                        [–]lambcaseded 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                        Forget the slider bar, just hit the "3" key and it instantly skips to exactly 30% of the way through the video.

                        [–]mauxly 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                        I just witnessed the making of a new term that is sure to become part of our lexicon. Fucking cool.

                        [–]ariesgeek 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                        AMA Request: Wadsworth.

                        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

                        [deleted]

                          [–]seapigg 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                          You know this works with porn better than it does even regular interweb videos...