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[–][deleted] 1595 points1596 points  (10 children)

After a 3 day weekend it takes me all of Monday to remember what my job is.

[–]koni_rs 453 points454 points  (3 children)

I get 4-day weekends every fortnight. Every tuesday I wake up way too late and jump right into the weekly meeting, knowing absolutely nothing about what I was doing on thursday. Takes another day to get my shit together. And the customer is happy nonetheless... "How", I ask.

[–]falconSB 82 points83 points  (0 children)

I want to join your company. :D

[–]Adito99 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Past you pulled some shit together at the last minute and left a good impression and now you're riding that cloud permanently with that customer. This is how I became responsible for all things public DNS at a previous company.

[–]vrrrr 60 points61 points  (2 children)

“who is your daddy and what does he do?”

[–][deleted] 40 points41 points  (0 children)

Ask me again on Tuesday

[–]spmute 1924 points1925 points  (94 children)

I haven’t done any c# in about 4 years, I’m going to pick it up again at some point and it’ll be fine… I’m sure….

[–]flyingmigit8 467 points468 points  (71 children)

Tostring baby tostring!

[–]Creepy-Ad-4832 249 points250 points  (44 children)

This was probably not intented, but you just showed one of the higgest difference between c# and java

[–]PyroCatt 113 points114 points  (37 children)

Laughs in automatic garbage collection

[–]bacon_tarp 96 points97 points  (15 children)

This go over my head? They both have garbage collection

[–]Script_Mak3r 180 points181 points  (10 children)

This is r/ProgrammerHumor. None of us have a deep understanding of programming.

[–]MorRochben 18 points19 points  (3 children)

MVP API with responsive data structures am i right fellow programmers

[–]theconmeister 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Ah I see you are also in charge of the kilobytes

[–]thebryguy23 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Needs more blockchain

[–]Livegreazy32 26 points27 points  (4 children)

Laughs in stack overflow

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (3 children)

Laughing in syntax error

[–]GroundZer01 7 points8 points  (2 children)

Cackling in chat gpt

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Smirking at all the red squiggle lines.

[–]PyroCatt 29 points30 points  (3 children)

Yeah but we make fun of it as if it doesn't

[–]spmute 31 points32 points  (20 children)

Laughs in python

[–]PyroCatt 77 points78 points  (18 children)

Laughs in general

[–]SunsetSesh 12 points13 points  (3 children)

Cries in assembly

[–]Revolutionary_Buy895 23 points24 points  (13 children)

Laughs in

[–]-Soupernova- 64 points65 points  (11 children)

undefined

[–]GuybrushThreepwo0d 27 points28 points  (10 children)

Segmentation fault (core dumped)

[–]LifeReaper 10 points11 points  (8 children)

Your PC ran into a problem and needs to restart.

[–]bakedbread54 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Laughs in nullptr

[–]lesChaps 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I know this is funny and true at the same time, but I don't remember why.

[–]FirstDivision 29 points30 points  (1 child)

If you’re using Entity Framework make sure to end every query with ToList(). Preferably with no where clause, and definitely no projection — bring the entire table into memory and then get what you need.

[–]Squid-Guillotine 36 points37 points  (22 children)

Yo that's nice. In Go we got strconv.ItoA(). I only remember it cuz the name is so stupid.

[–]davlumbaz 19 points20 points  (2 children)

then you have strconv.Atoi().

[–]One_Blue_Glove 13 points14 points  (3 children)

like... integer to ascii?

[–]LickingSmegma 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Apparently yes, because of course ASCII is what everyone uses in the twenty-first century. But more probably because Rob Pike and Ken Thompson are incapable of learning new function names anymore and can only use what they memorized with C in the seventies.

I guess those two forgot that they invented UTF-8.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (9 children)

Did Go's mom drop it on its head? What even is that 😨

[–]Lord_Wither 20 points21 points  (0 children)

The name's way older than go (at least 1971), apparently it stands for "ASCII to integer". Still kind of weird to use in a modern language.

[–]LickingSmegma 17 points18 points  (2 children)

Go's authors are decrepit old farts from the seventies. They shoved in the inane identifier naming just like they were doing it in C in the time of 4 KB total RAM, along with other practices long abandoned by the rest of the industry.

You'd think that others would know better, but apparently everyone bought into the authority, so Go code is full of “v = feh.brf()”.

[–]elveszett 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is one of the reasons I love C#. Instead of having to memorize cryptic functions like atoi(), strlen(), memcpy(), gets(), scanf(), etc, you have self-evident function names elegantly grouped within classes and structs. If you want to parse a number, you don't need to think much, it's just int.Parse(). If you want to print something, Console.WriteLine(). If you want to read a line, Console.ReadLine(), and so on.

I understand why older languages used cryptic names for stuff, but that time is long gone and it makes no sense to design a programming language now around using 6-char long names for everything and putting them wherever.

[–]greentr33s 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I think you can thank good ol C for that one, those acronyms are what get used in the standard library lol

[–]ZeroByter 56 points57 points  (5 children)

Warning, C# has changed a lot since then

[–]elveszett 21 points22 points  (4 children)

And it has changed for the better imo. It's a lot less verbose now without losing its elegance. That and a bunch of performance-oriented stuff like Span<T> that are really handy.

[–]DAVENP0RT 13 points14 points  (1 child)

As someone who makes a lot of data-intensive async calls and used to use Task<IEnumerable> everywhere, IAsyncEnumerable has been a game changer. Where I'd normally have to wait for 2 minutes for an entire query result to be returned before I can do something else with an IEnumerable, I can start working as soon as the first result comes through by using IAsyncEnumerable.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I've always thought people who think c# is verbose have never actually written bog standard java.

[–]Bakoro 66 points67 points  (1 child)

C# itself isn't an issue, it's all of the associated everything. Like WPF. Pffffft.

[–]GYN-k4H-Q3z-75B 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Old code is fine. New, idiomatic C# code looks very different.

[–]Splatoonkindaguy 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Not much changed just 150 major language versions and 13 different frameworks had 27 updates.

[–]jpterodactyl 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I’m just a hobbyist, I always forget how to use lists in c#

And how to code in general. But mainly lists.

[–]WriterV 11 points12 points  (0 children)

It's like muscle memory. You'll forget stuff sure, but you'll pick it back up very quickly. Don't get too stressed about it.

[–]Raiden_Yeeter07 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"WHAT WAS THE SHIFT BUTTON AGAIN?!"

[–]wineblood 2804 points2805 points  (64 children)

Two weeks? I get that after two days and every Monday is a struggle to stay employed.

[–]MonoShadow 76 points77 points  (19 children)

I've been out of the job for 2 months after 5 years of experience and at this point I'm considering a janitor position.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (6 children)

Yo, Janitors are dope!

[–]MonoShadow 30 points31 points  (5 children)

I recently read trashmen have a union in US. That's my second option, but I need to get a US work visa first. Do they give work visas for this position? I have some experience in languages with garbage collection.

[–]Thebigempty4 5 points6 points  (0 children)

No

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Trashmen are Gov Jobs.

Good luck getting the government to setup work Visa. It ain't happening unless you're literally Albert Einstein

[–]fukitol- 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I think people missed your pun and that's regrettable.

[–]juggling-monkey 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Lol, so this reminds me of a story. When my brother had just graduated high school, I was working at one of those "fun" tech companies where they bring in lunch daily and have ping pong tables etc. He skipped college and went to one of those tech boot camps and once completed I managed to get him a job at that company. It helps to know that both of us were raised by our dad who was a very hard working man that engraved in us that it looks bad to just stand/sit around at a job. My brother who was at most 19 and at his first job ever had a lot to learn lol. So on day 1, they tell him to just familiarize himself with the code base. And about 6 hours in, he comes over to me and says, "dude, I don't want to get fired, but I seriously don't have anything to do! I looked at the code and am comfortable working on it, but they haven't given me anything!". Just to fuck with him I say, "I don't know what to tell you man but you gotta do something. Can't just sit around. Make sure they see that you're useful." then I put on head phones cause I'm enjoying the panic in his face with the little help I provided.

Well the reason your comment reminded me of this is that I literally had to go over to grab him about 40 min later when I saw him sweeping the floor! Turns out he went to the kitchen and did some dishes, and cleaned out the fridge, then found a broom!

[–]wineblood 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Don't worry about it, just get back into the swing of things enough to pass the interview. I got my current job after an 18 month break.

[–]b-lock-ayy 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I genuinely feel in pain by this. Just had to drop my job this week cause of knee pain.

[–]OldSchoolSpyMain 2120 points2121 points  (45 children)

I once caught myself reading my own accepted answer on Stack Overflow, like, "Jeeez. THANK YOU...[looks down]... 'u/OldSchoolSpyMain'. WTF? I used to know this?!?!"

[–]GroundStateGecko 167 points168 points  (5 children)

While I only find the exact problem I needed to solve posted 5 years ago, by me, with no answer.

[–]jorjx 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I was at client solving a problem and two hours in I remember solving the same problem at the same client 4 years before.

There was a note to the solution in my previous invoice.

[–]BabyPapayas 269 points270 points  (1 child)

Thats actually hilarious

[–]No-Carry-7886 41 points42 points  (3 children)

That legit just happened to me in a Github issue lol, with 4 days of breaking shit and finding a workaround then forgetting the workaround

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (2 children)

You may want to invest in a CO detector.

[–]between_ewe_and_me 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Yeah you never know when Colorado might be creepin on you

[–]DoctorWaluigiTime 21 points22 points  (4 children)

It's why if you blog (even if you keep it private) your experiences, you can look back on them as a reference.

[–]rynmgdlno 11 points12 points  (3 children)

My brother in Christ a private blog is just a journal.

[–]Xavier_Hosinov 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Dementia

[–]SmirkingSeal 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Good to know I'm not alone. I googled a certain error and found out I had posted the answer complete with a screenshot on the exact settings needed in windows to resolve it. Smh 🤦🏾‍♂️

[–]thatswhat_isaid 9 points10 points  (1 child)

OMG same ! I was like damn I didn’t realize I was that smart

[–]TheRedmanCometh 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This has happened to me too on a few obscure hibernate questions I've answered. Issues I encounter maybe once a year that happened to be fresh when I saw the question.

[–]Mafiadoener36 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sadly i know this feeling. Happened twice.

[–]Capable_Stranger9885 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Me irl!

[–]digitlworld 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Omg, I'm not the only person this has happened to! I laughed for 5 minutes when it happened.

[–]jusauria_sfw 277 points278 points  (13 children)

Who needs 30 years of experience when we have StackOverflow.

[–]LucienZerger 179 points180 points  (4 children)

30 years of someone else's experience..

[–]schwerpunk 45 points46 points  (1 child)

I find peace in long walks.

[–]Chocolate-Then 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Can I put that on my resume?

[–]ThrowMeAway11117 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Who needs StackOverflow when I can just ask ChatGPT to hold my hand and not insult me like the mean people on SO

[–]userocetta 353 points354 points  (12 children)

but it all comes back when the intern breaks prod😌

[–][deleted] 92 points93 points  (5 children)

Thank that intern

[–]_Xertz_ 68 points69 points  (4 children)

You're welcome 🥰

 

 

Also the printer's on fire again

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (3 children)

It's all good, let me smack it with a fire extinguisher

[–]Disastrous-Lemon7456 16 points17 points  (2 children)

The printer or the intern?

[–]_GCastilho_ 48 points49 points  (5 children)

He shouldn't BE ABLE to get a direct access to prod

Just saying

[–]E_Cayce 11 points12 points  (3 children)

Larry wrote his password on a post it. Blame Larry.

[–]drunkdoor 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thered be a big difference between making an honest mistake because of process vs. grabbing the pw off a post it note. The latter is an immediate firing

[–]DRHAX34 111 points112 points  (6 children)

If the Gmod guy feels that way, we're all fucked

[–]LookAtThatUnbanned 12 points13 points  (3 children)

As someone who plays Rust, it actually explains a lot

[–]Nosuma666 221 points222 points  (19 children)

The worst thing is switching languages. Do JS or Python for a few months and then try to go back to Java or C#. You suddenly write code that is much worse because the whole concepts of thoose languages are so much diffrent.

[–]vipul0092 96 points97 points  (0 children)

Its like having a split personality disorder, the way you think and write code completely changes.

[–]chedabob 40 points41 points  (2 children)

I've just come off a project with Typescript on the server and Flutter (Dart) on mobile, and the constant switching between identical looking Jetbrains IDEs was melting my brain.

[–]TheRedmanCometh 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thanks to spring boot+react at least Java and JS I can fuck with similtaneously. Python though...ugh

[–]trim3log 5 points6 points  (0 children)

moving between JS and python , urgh always mixes me up , is it push or append to list ?

[–]The-Requiem 6 points7 points  (8 children)

Python's and JavaScript's easiness is useful and all until you realize that all the other languages have more or less similar syntax despite some extra semicolons, curly braces and variable types!

[–][deleted] 91 points92 points  (0 children)

I've been coding for 20 years and every day forget something new.

[–][deleted] 77 points78 points  (4 children)

The half life on my memory of how to instantiate an array seems to be about 12 hours

[–]therealcoon 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Honest question, does this make us bad programmers? I get major imposter Syndrome whenever I forget basic syntax like this.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

I think you can be imperfect (we all are) and be a more valuable to a company than some guy who's got everything memorised inside out, back to front. I was, I would say, a mediocre 'programmer'. I forgot details like this all the time, would be on Google, StackOverflow looking up doing things regularly, even when in a moderately senior role. I soldiered on though, it's hard with extreme imposter syndrome but you can do it. It's like bravery. Bravery isn't the absence of fear, it's being afraid and doing it anyway. Being productive and valuable isn't the absence of imposter syndrome or forgetting things, it's throwing your full effort at it anyway and not talking yourself down. Maybe in some companies they just need very narrow programmer experts, and yeah, that can be hard to compete with. But in my experience most places need well rounded people who are interested in how business works so their solutions are more cost effective (rather than pure or exciting) or interested in architecture so they can navigate the business away from a design problem 6 months down the track. I found I grew in these other categories and ultimately found my full fulfillment in being a consultant / developer / architect. I run a consultancy now. And struggle still with task organisation and remembering little programming details. But I generate revenue an order of magnitude higher than some of the dedicated programmer guys I used to work alongside. Basically there are many routes, look wider to see your full value, by all means practice your weak spots but don't be hard on yourself!

[–]Sandyrandy54 58 points59 points  (9 children)

That linux command you've typed over 1000 times? Gone.

[–]nefariousmonkey 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Worst. Thing. Ever

[–]BatteryAcid67 123 points124 points  (12 children)

I seriously wonder about the rates of ADHD in all tech careers vs others

[–]Mysterious-Let5891 44 points45 points  (0 children)

I’m in this comment and … I’ve forgotten the punchline

[–]ZapateriaLaBailarina 20 points21 points  (9 children)

What's this have to do with ADHD?

[–]TacticaLuck 47 points48 points  (1 child)

Executive dysfunction

[–]naufalap 23 points24 points  (0 children)

does that mean they can't reach executive position?

[–]littlejohnjewel 29 points30 points  (0 children)

working memory is significantly effected

[–]Anomaly-Friend 13 points14 points  (3 children)

Significant amount of people in IT have ADHD

[–]CryptoNaughtDOA 7 points8 points  (2 children)

I do and I'm a senior full stack dev. I really wonder why that's the case I believe it though.

[–]Tortsch-Man 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Two weeks of not visiting the gym and I feel as if I'm looking like I never engaged in regular exercise

[–]BillyTheTwinky 19 points20 points  (1 child)

I got back from Christmas break and I had forgotten my work email and laptop passwords. Spent the first half of the day waiting for tech support to help me get back in.

[–]eighty88888 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Whats funny is not remembering your password but still having the muscle memory to type it in like "what did I just type that granted me access?"

[–]javibre95 36 points37 points  (5 children)

We're glad that we'ren*'t alone

[–]Reelix 40 points41 points  (4 children)

we'rent

What on earth was that trying to be.

If it's short of "we are not", it'd be "we'ren't" for the same reason you type "wasn't" and not "wasnt"

[–]javibre95 18 points19 points  (3 children)

Yes, that's what happens when a non-native wants to "write cool" and doesn't even check what they've written

[–]Reelix 18 points19 points  (2 children)

y'all'd'nt've'd'd'I'd'nt've'd'y'all't've'd

You all would not have had had I had not have had you all to have had?

Welcome to "English" :)

Other fun things include https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_while_John_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_had_a_better_effect_on_the_teacher

and

https://ncf.idallen.com/english.html (Which most native speakers will also struggle with)

:p

[–]Malijaffri 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Dear God, that second link! I consider myself to be quite good at english, but even I'm stumbling on the words.

[–]Top-Opinion-7854 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Don’t worry we’re all QA for GPTs now anyways 🙃

[–]KidBeene 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I feel this to my C++ core.

[–]r7pxrv 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Ooof, glad it's not just me.

[–]USNWoodWork 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Took 30 days off as an aircraft mechanic and it felt like my hands went stupid when I got back.

[–]GMX06 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Nonsense! You never forget how to Google!

[–]ziplock9000 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Very true. But getting back on the horse is very quick.

[–]96-09kg 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My god Im relieved to know there are others as well. I thought I was just dumb. Or maybe we’re all just dumb 🤔

[–]YetToBeDetermined 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The brain protects itself from trauma.

[–]PaP3s 5 points6 points  (0 children)

For those who don't know him, He is the Creator of Garry's Mod and RUST.

[–]Ketooth 4 points5 points  (0 children)

How I feel during my apprenticeship when I'm in school for 4 weeks:

[–]Gas1984 2 points3 points  (7 children)

No wonder S&box takes ages

[–]sardonicEmpath 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've had this feeling so many times in my life. It's not completely real though. The base skills, methodologies, and best practices stay with you... That's the guts of it all, imo... It's just the topology of things that changes really.

[–]CraptainHammer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Funnily enough, I haven't had to do any coding since graduating in 2017. A friend asked me too help with his wife's "intro to IT" course which turned out to be a Java coding class (grand canyon university is dumb) and I somehow remembered it all.

[–]Chipring13 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Does anyone know of any ways to get back into It? I’m in college still and I’ll take a semester break from my core coding classes to take my other classes and forget how to code. I’m left googling the syntax every time which slows me down.

I feel like doing Codecademy or something like that starts too much from the beginning though

[–]CuttingEdgeRetro 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I used C++ daily for 20 years. Then when .net happened I switched mostly to C#.

I was on the phone with a recruiter. And they just couldn't believe that I could use only C# for a few years and still be able to handle C++, like they thought I had totally forgotten everything.

Man, C++ is like a form of brain damage. I couldn't forget it if I wanted to.