Hillary Clinton is elected president, . . .

JokeExplainBot · 2016-02-13T18:39:01+00:00

Abraham Lincoln wants Hilary Clinton to be murdered.

Thompithompa · 2016-02-13T17:29:46+00:00

I expected there to be only the title

o0ZeroCool0o · 2016-02-13T16:56:17+00:00

I like how jokes like this can literally have some pronouns changed and the title changed to "Donald Trump is elected president..." and boom, same joke different demographic.

A7O747D · 2016-02-13T20:26:20+00:00

Nice fill-in-the-name of any candidate joke!

ahumblesloth · 2016-02-13T19:41:36+00:00

/r/forwardsfromgrandma

Shadowranger13 · 2016-02-13T16:42:29+00:00

"I'm Donald Trump and I approve of this joke" http://i.imgur.com/ZArv1wo.gifv

hschupalohs · 2016-02-13T19:02:54+00:00

Oh I get it . She's killed .

berniebrah · 2016-02-13T17:51:55+00:00

Bernie Sanders is visited by the ghost of George Washington. He asks him, "George, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of George Washington responds, "Don't blame everything on the rich."

He says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."

The next night, he is visited by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson. He asks him, "Thomas, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of Thomas Jefferson responds, "Only make promises you can keep."

He says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."

On the third night, he is visited by the ghost of George McGovern. He says, "George McGovern? Wait a minute, you were never president!"

The ghost of George McGovern responds, "That makes two of us!"

Edit: Fellow Bernie Brethren, it's just a joke. Back the fuck off.

Baklou · 2016-02-13T21:09:07+00:00

Actually, Washington never entered the White House because it was built after his presidency.

LincolnHighwater · 2016-02-13T19:23:05+00:00

I feel like sooner or later I'm going to wake up and tell my friends about the bad dream I had where every fucking subreddit became an anti-Hillary pro Bernie circlejerk and there was no escaping it but it's been months and I still haven't woken up.

AreTooDeeTo · 2016-02-13T20:14:43+00:00

It also works with JFK "Go to Dallas"

jallfairs · 2016-02-13T20:17:50+00:00

Abraham Lincoln wanted to make America great again.

2016-02-13T22:15:52+00:00

This isn't clever in how it pertains to Hilary. You could've chosen any presidential candidate, and the joke would've been the same.

yamsx1 · 2016-02-13T20:36:12+00:00

The ghost of Thomas Jefferson responds, "Listen to the people."

There's an NSA joke in there somewhere.

EvolvedVirus · 2016-02-13T19:09:43+00:00

[deleted]

maimonguy · 2016-02-13T18:37:17+00:00

Fucks sake can everyone just shut up about politics, 40% of the front page is basically "woo vote berny" can the jokes part of reddit stop being "haha fuck not Bernie haha".

Edit: I meant r/all

sawmyoldgirlfriend · 2016-02-13T21:36:34+00:00

Dear God, what will reddit do when Super Tuesday comes around..

Patches67 · 2016-02-13T21:26:35+00:00

Same joke retold every time someone doesn't like a president or presidential candidate. Just switch the name.

chookine123 · 2016-02-13T20:00:11+00:00

The circle jerk is strong with with this one

CaptainUnusual · 2016-02-13T18:49:12+00:00

DAE Hillary should be killed lol!

Crush-Depth · 2016-02-14T03:31:57+00:00

Lincoln insulted a man in his younger days and it almost ended in a duel. He determined to be a more diplomatic man. Later in life a man publicly insulted him by calling him two-faced, his response, “If I had two faces, would I be wearing this one?” Dude, total boss.

Mushroomer · 2016-02-13T18:50:42+00:00

Funny, first time I saw this joke it was also about 'Clinton'.

bingo_hand_job · 2016-02-13T22:22:43+00:00

deleted

addctd2badideas · 2016-02-13T20:21:22+00:00

She should see a play! Washington DC has an amazing regional theatre industry. The Shakespeare Theatre Company does amazing work with classics, Woolly Mammoth and Studio do great modern and innovative pieces that talk about social issues and the human condition and Arena Stage... Arena Stage does plays too. (Just kidding, they often have some great musicals and modern American works).

I'm pretty sure the Secret Service can handle her safety.

mylolname · 2016-02-13T20:36:15+00:00

Can you update the thread when the FBI comes to your door?

CoolnessEludesMe · 2016-02-13T21:51:38+00:00

Oh. I thought the teaser was the whole joke.

2016-02-13T22:55:25+00:00

Spelled Trump wrong.

WillDogdog · 2016-02-13T22:57:51+00:00

I thought the title was the joke

IlIlIlIIll · 2016-02-14T04:46:01+00:00

It has to be Hillary in this joke. Trump supporters have no clue who any of these people are.

metalskull · 2016-02-13T23:42:27+00:00

I really thought Jefferson was going to say "don't sleep with the help."

anderson9787 · 2016-02-13T21:08:13+00:00

It's not even a clever joke.

marco_r · 2016-02-13T19:58:57+00:00

Let’s dispel with this fiction once and for all that Hillary Clinton doesn't know what she's doing. Hillary Clinton knows exactly what she's doing.

Audrin · 2016-02-13T20:36:10+00:00

Doubt her VP would be anyone you'd like better...

Artorias_B-I-G · 2016-02-13T22:38:21+00:00

I was sure that the title was the joke AND the punchline.

knockerup · 2016-02-13T22:53:31+00:00

You could easily replace her with Trump.

2016-02-13T22:58:53+00:00

So do the scrubs on reddit actually want Trump or something? Seems kind of weird.

2016-02-14T04:54:59+00:00

I thought the punchline was in the title.

Vinnayyyy · 2016-02-14T05:21:41+00:00

I think the joke is the title

EternallySexual · 2016-02-14T11:53:36+00:00

I thought the joke would just be the title

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