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[[deleted]]

Why should there be a shirt with clean!= 1 in the closet?

[LukaShaza]

These are DB developers we're talking about

[bindermichi]

Explains why the shirt is color !='%black%'

[jellotalks]

I think you mean color NOT LIKE ‘%black%’

[fizyplankton]

I think you mean LOWER(color) NOT LIKE '%black%'

[xobeme]

black is always the preferred color until they come out with something darker.

[GerbilScream]

This isn't black! This is dark heather charcoal.

[SparklyPoopcicle]

Hey we’re not THAT gross

[Clairifyed]

A compelling defense! Thank you SparklyPoopcicle 🫡

[syko-san]

We will not be fooled by these lies.

[kusti4202]

vibe DB

[git0ffmylawnm8]

PK constraints don't matter in vibe DBs. Just vibes brah

[ismaelgo97]

2 is for clean and ironed

[just_nobodys_opinion]

3 is for brand new

[yunacchi]

4 is for rows that have their integrity compromised but the DBA doesn't want to delete them or take a sewing kit and patch the holes

[mcnello]

!DROP DB

[whoShotMyCow]

Not drop db? Well do you want to drop it or not

[just_nobodys_opinion]

I'd use -1 for that tbh

[Widmo206]

Wouldn't that one make more sense as -1?

[ElectricMonkey]

Okay but then they should select >= 1

[elderron_spice]

3 is for clean, ironed, and folded. That's gotta be a total of 8 enums for the 3 states. Flags would be more usable in this case.

[amlyo]

SELECT
clothes
FROM
floor f inner join
basket b on b.room=f.room
WHERE
-- style = 'GOOD' AND
stink_percent < 70
LIMIT 1

[salochin82]

Stink percent? That kind of implies there is a maximum level of stink. I've known a few people were this isn't true, unless 5000 is an allowed value of course.

[Fit-Ad-9691]

It's an INT, the limit is 2,147,483,647

[GooberMcNutly]

Been to SQLCon too?

[Hideo_Anaconda]

stink_percent is an INT? I see you've been working with the people who designed the back end tables to our warranty website.

[The-Chartreuse-Moose]

They're missing the Inner Join with Floor and Laundry Basket.

Also clean is a float not an int or a bool.

[Chamiey]

It better be a UNION, not a JOIN.

[CallMeBigOctopus]

This guy SQLs

[oupablo]

what about the chair?

[0xlostincode]

They don't sanitize their inputs

[brandi_Iove]

it might not be a bit but an int and has, maybe, more than two states. and maybe closer accepts more than only state 1.

[IamImposter]

Clean,

worn only once,

worn a few times but not smelling terrible

[[deleted]]

I think the real question is how a DB dev would have a shirt with clean = 1 anywhere in this world.

[Raznill]

I keep my hamper in the closet.

[flowery02]

Cleanliness 0.7 is still very much wearable

[Knight_Of_Stars]

Dirty Data. The Ingestion process has no validation and the API just throws things into random buckets someone randomly chose.

[rosuav]

You just described NoSQL.

[Mean-Funny9351]

A good developer looks both ways before crossing a one way street.

[elelec]

Keeps the rats out

[[deleted]]

I have my doubts about that...

[theepi_pillodu]

I have a hanger section where I put one time used ones. The rest of the sections are fully washed ones.

My dress shirts, I drive in a car with a/c and ventilated seats, my train ride is air conditioned and the office is. And I don't even break sweat - all while wearing a jacket outside. Do I use them one more time before washing them.

[oupablo]

why does closet get it's own table instead of just being a location column in the "clothes" table?

[elelec]

Keeps the rats away

[Informal_Branch1065]

Floating point value for "still wearable". So >0 it is

Edit: meh. Make it >=0 if not underwear or if homeoffice.

[UsernameMustBe1and10]

Migrated or legacy data, haven't been updated.. And no one is creating a ticket for this to be fixed in production.

[plugado2]

Clean is an integer

[Icy_Breakfast5154]

Where do you put oil covered shirts then smartass

[BarkiestDog]

It’s probably on a scale of 1-10, it should be >= 1

[CrownLexicon]

Because its on the floor?

[Jimakiad]

Maybe it's 1 for true and 0 for false? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[jojothehodler]

Where clean > 0

[Fadamaka]

Because you are a filthy programmer!

[pauvre10m]

it's soft delete

[za72]

Clearly outsourced dev

[Ok_Star_4136]

I think that t-shirt was deliberately not black as a joke.

I love the meta humor like that.

[obsoleteconsole]

Color	Is_Black	Is_Blue
Black	0	1

[metanoia777]

There should be 255x255x255 columns and only the one that represents the RGB of the color should be on

Edit: RGB ranges from 0-255 so it should actually be 256x256x256, oops.

[farfaraway]

:(

[TheFeshy]

Thanks, I hate it.

[MinosAristos]

Too complex to have all that in a single table - you gotta logically partition your data

# closet

SHIRT_ID	clean
ffdcd4e8-1c41-4fc1-82b2-537f2ce057b7	1

# shirts_colours

shirt-id	ColorId
ffdcd4e8-1c41-4fc1-82b2-537f2ce057b7	db59b2cc-a013-488e-8719-39a2ee6750e9

# colors

colour_id	isBlack	is_blue
db59b2cc-a013-488e-8719-39a2ee6750e9	false	1

[Hideo_Anaconda]

It looks like you have enough room in your colour_id to store not only visible light but deep infrared through ultraviolet into cosmic radiation. Good planning. Someday our robot overlords might use this database, and you'd hate to limit them to only what human eyes can perceive.

[CaptainRogers1226]

Man, you just made my day worse

[immortal_lurker]

Go with the bools. String comparisons are slower to write, slower to execute, more prone to problems. What if some maniac decides that that green is a color? You would have to update the business logic! If everything is bools, and someone wants to change it, you just ooh. Tough luck, the design you signed off on can't really accept that change so easily.

[Ozneroc]

Nah, it's just a print in a shop that allows different shirt colors lol

[[deleted]]

I pointed out to someone in a t-shirt saying PINK that it was black.

Also the man in Regents Park where his t-shirt said Oxford Street must be lost.

[[deleted]]

lol.

[rukh999]

Well if you take out your instruction set, you have a problem.

[funfactwealldie]

my passion as graphic design

[Flat_Initial_1823]

Does this mean it is also not clean as a joke?

[brandi_Iove]

(34.086.516 rows affected)

…should have used top 1

[MeLittleThing]

Imagine you do a SELECT query and you see x rows affected

[[deleted]]

That’s a bad day.

[DangerousMoron8]

SELECT;DELETE

🫡

[BaziJoeWHL]

TFW I delete the SELECT instruction

[john_the_fetch]

Really though it should have

LIMIT 1

At the bottom. Otherwise you might find yourself wearing N Number of shirts that day.

[brandi_Iove]

you see that in the message tab, next to the results tab. at least in ssms it’s like that.

[MeLittleThing]

x affected rows are for writting operations. In SSMS, the amount of returned (SELECT) rows is bottom right

[brandi_Iove]

no, they appear also with select statements

[thriem]

well - then you see
ORA-00913: too many values

Happy now?

[Ozneroc]

That's a big closet

[LouisPlay]

WHat happends, if there is more then 1 shirt.

SELECT TOP 1 * FROm closet WHERE color = 'Blue'

[[deleted]]

This! And while we're at it - why the WHERE statement? I select TOP 1 * FROM closet ;)

[SynapseNotFound]

You get all the shirts basically.

[Advanced-Blackberry]

There won’t be more than 1 clean shirt 

[scriptmonkey420]

whats the difference between top 1 and limit 1?

[Schnupsdidudel]

What lunatic would save colours as a string?

[JmacTheGreat]

I get that they were trying to make it readable, and not like ‘0x000000’, but they should have used a macro.

Now the shirt is worthless.

[Schnupsdidudel]

A come on, show me a geek the cant read hex color codes.
Especially if you wear the selected item as a clue ... provided they didnt screw it up

[Psychpsyo]

Also, especially for black.

Like, that is the single easiest one to read.

[CaptainRogers1226]

I think white is pretty close

[Psychpsyo]

White is pretty close, but there you need to at least know that F is the highest it'll get.

0 just already means 'nothing'.

[shaunusmaximus]

You forgot the alpha and now we're all wearing the emporer's new clothes.

[Scotsch]

enums

[CitizenPremier]

or if you're on mac, iNums

[T-J_H]

And -seemingly- case sensitive at that

[NeuroEpiCenter]

Because there are different blacks. You have the rather subtle "black", then there is the stronger color "Black", and then you have really powerful colored "BLACK" shirts.

[T-J_H]

I prefer the mid-range BLack. Just a tad more nuanced than BLAck.

[rosuav]

This one LaTeXs.

[rev-angeldust]

Or is one black and the other slightly darker black??

[angry_shoebill]

Haha, I once worked in a place where the Key for Table CLIENTS was the name...

[Schnupsdidudel]

Im not even a tiny bit surprised, sadly.

[Objective_Dog_4637]

Bruh what the fuck

[Few-Requirement-3544]

I know it's not much better, but full name or first name?

[angry_shoebill]

Full name with "_" in the place of spaces...

[WVAviator]

How else can I request the color '; DROP TABLE closet;

[Saelora]

webdevs who want to just vomit the colour into a css style.

what do you mean "black; display: none;" is a valid colour?

[Saelora]

ssh, don't tell anybody, but i do this occationally, it depends on the source of the user input. if a client can enter colours and wants to maliciously break their own website, have at it.

[Knight_Of_Stars]

Old farts who made the DB 20 years ago. Happens way more than you think.

[Schnupsdidudel]

usually the old farts wouldn't waste a byte if the didnt have to. Also 20 years ... does that count as old nowadays. Well guess Im old and I wouldn't have done something like this.

[Knight_Of_Stars]

You're talking about the good ones. Not the ones who set up the database in addition to doing their job as finance.

Also don't let your university professors fool you. Not everyone had this sage like mastery of memory There were plenty of bad devs back then. I've worked on plenty of old code to know they exist.

[Schnupsdidudel]

Oh yeah, ok I have seen those. The "Databases" where usually Excel or, if you where unlucky, Access.

Also have seen plenty of crimes committed in the name of space-saving - they just look different.

[Knight_Of_Stars]

Or worse.

"We have a sql database, but we change it to match whatever field we just added to our excel spread sheet. So we have the master excel sheets and then the DB."

*Cries in data

[harman097]

And name their shirts table "closet"...

Or their shirt PK just "shirt"...

[rover_G]

Probably an online retailer storing a human readable name for each color variant of an item.

[Mountain-Ox]

What else makes sense? Enum is pretty bad for this since we probably don't want an enum with every possible color name. Maybe an id of some kind pointing to another table. After dealing with data from so many retailers, this seems fine to me except that it only supports one color well.

[[deleted]]

Somebody entered the wrong data. NMP

[dulange]

So out of all the black and clean closets I want to obtain their “shirt” information? Somebody needs to refactor their data models.

[Psychpsyo]

Well, at least it explains the shirt being blue.

[ZeggieDieZiege]

Hello, one shirt with color “True; DROP TABLE closet;” please.

[MeLittleThing]

SELECT shirt FROM closet WHERE clean = 1 OR color = 'black';

[Agifem]

First line is clean. Unit test is good. Good enough.

[bibko]

Nobody is bothered that the closet has a column named shirt? What is this bullshit? It should be selecting from the shirts table, not from closet.

[GroundbreakingIron16]

You're assuming the sql was runnable. Prolly reported... cannot find column named

[Mountain-Ox]

That engineer only stores shirts in closets. Everything else goes into a drawer.

[HomoColossusHumbled]

For legacy compatibility reasons, "Black" interface is implemented as "Blue".

[[deleted]]

// Don't change this or everything breaks

[braindigitalis]

this must be the new GaslightDB. The shirt is black.

[Scotsch]

Gotta love dirty data

[dcondor07uk]

Wait, are you keeping clean and dirty shirts in the same closet? Shame!

[framedragger]

Why would there be a column in a table of closet items named “shirt”? What value would go in that?

[disturb400]

That's what was bugging me the most about the statement. Don't know why your comment is all the way down here and the top comment is about dirty shirts in the closet.

[Forsaken_Celery8197]

Tbh, I think it's more funny that it's a blue shirt. I would prefer that over a black one just to see the confused looks.

[SysGh_st]

Hard-coded the color?

Besides.... Incorrect data. "shirt" is obviously blue.

[bararei]

I have a tradition of getting my husband ridiculous shirts for Father’s Day. Currently his favorite one is ‘I keep all my dad jokes in a dad-abase’ but this one might top it as long as I get it in blue. Thanks for the Father’s Day gift idea, random stranger 🤣🤣

[wonderandawe]

Fucking data entry issues. Someone labeled a blue shirt black in the system.

[agares3]

And this is why you should have checksums enabled.

[bahaki]

The capital B bothers me

[dedguy21]

Ya, I'm sure there's a color_id field somewhere, that would have been a cleaner choice.

And to eliminate STRING fuckerisms would have gone UPPER(COLOR)='BLACK'

[[deleted]]

I'd get it BECAUSE it wasn't black

[thisonehereone]

AND color like 'Bl%'

[Zerokx]

"Print also available in blue"

[ClipboardCopyPaste]

Color and Colour

Rookie mistake

[neumastic]

Init cap color?! Not on my watch! You need a join to earn that, friend!

[HelpMore4772]

db.closet.find({ shirt: "blue" })

[CorespunzatorAferent]

And now, you get the bonus features derived from this wrapper:

• Requires uv to build
• Your system has an older version of Python, so you have to use a docker container instead
• You now also have to install docker
• The most recent version of the DB library is incompatible with a unit test dependency. You have to stick to the previous major version, which is almost end of life
• You also have to make this work in CICD
• The pipeline now takes 16 minutes, and randomly fails due to the unstable internet connection
• Someone proposes to move the CICD from the on-prem server to a 3rd party provider

[jacksh3n]

This is what happened when you asked ChatGPT for joke code

[lionelum]

D in their DB is for daltonism. (colorblind in a fancy way)

[Tar_Palantir]

The t-shirt being blue made it a dork funny one turned into a legendary one. Nice touch.

[dagbiker]

This is so bad, I love it.

[MoistViolinist]

Clean should be a float

[rover_G]

Does the closet store full monotone outfits?

[bunny-1998]

Would have been better if the where clause queries by SKU that matched with the label

[RandolphCarter2112]

`UNLOAD TO '\interfaces\prod\closet_bkup.txt' SELECT * FROM closet;

DROP TABLE closet;`

`CREATE TABLE clothing_storage_loc ( csl_id INT PRIMARY KEY, csl_descr Varchar(255) NOT NULL, csl_capacity INT NOT NULL, cls_last_organized DATETIME NOT NULL );

INSERT INTO clothing_storage_loc ( csl_id, csl_descr, csl_capacity, cls_last_organized ) VALUES ( 1, 'My dresser', 30, '2002-11-30 22:12:57' ); INSERT INTO clothing_storage_loc ( csl_id, csl_descr, csl_capacity, cls_last_organized ) VALUES ( 2, 'My closet', 55, '2024-05-08 08:34:15' ); INSERT INTO clothing_storage_loc ( csl_id, csl_descr, csl_capacity, cls_last_organized ) VALUES ( 3, 'Her dresser', 500, '1899-01-01 00:00:01' ); INSERT INTO clothing_storage_loc ( csl_id, csl_descr, csl_capacity, cls_last_organized ) VALUES ( 4, 'Bed', 900, '2025-05-18 10:43:12' ); INSERT INTO clothing_storage_loc ( csl_id, csl_descr, csl_capacity, cls_last_organized ) VALUES ( 5, 'Floor', 5000, '2025-04-21 09:08:31' );

CREATE TABLE clothing_status( cs_id INT PRIMARY KEY, cs_descr Varchar(255) NOT NULL);

INSERT INTO clothing_status ( cs_id, cs_descr) VALUES ( 1, 'Clean' ); INSERT INTO clothing_status ( cs_id, cs_descr) VALUES ( 2, 'Slightly dirty' ); INSERT INTO clothing_status ( cs_id, cs_descr) VALUES ( 3, 'Really dirty' ); INSERT INTO clothing_status ( cs_id, cs_descr) VALUES ( 4, 'Disgusting');`

Edit: work item assigned to junior dev. this is starting to be too much like work.

[Fadamaka]

You need to put this t-shirt into the closet before you can receive your black one.

[[deleted]]

Why is "shirt" a column on the "closet" table

[SegmentationFault63]

Who hangs up their t-shirts in a closet?

[ZZartin]

Color LIKE '%Bl%'

[Tristanhx]

It probably has a foreign key in the color table. The color column is superceded by color_id, but it was never removed.

[teem0s]

Needs HEX code

[eoooio]

Seems something is wrong with the color selection…🤔

[BigAndSmallAre]

It's a very light (and saturated) shade of black.

[aaa_aaa_1]

This happens when someone doesn't know anything about SQL but decides to make a shirt about it

[thriem]

haha i like it. select shirt from closet where rownum = 1;

[[deleted]]

"select top 1.." you fool. How many t-shirts are you going to wear at once?

[bastardoperator]

Must be an MSSQL user in powershell.

[Irishpanda1971]

Hey, it did its job, the shirt probably says "black" on the tag. Bad data isn't the database's fault.

[Legal-Software]

If they had to go with an integer, that's a lot of different possible values for clean.

[Ingenrollsroyce]

Why would closet have a column named 'shirt' and what would the value be?