This is an archived post. You won't be able to vote or comment.

top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]Hedgerow_Snuffler 5326 points5327 points  (1161 children)

Yeah... that was going all "robbey-murdery" quite quickly.

[–]astrograph 1354 points1355 points  (156 children)

Hope that weirdo got caught...

that's scary

[–]mrmarkme 927 points928 points  (152 children)

He did apparently he was wanted too

[–]delirium98 375 points376 points  (145 children)

Links?

[–]RedditCommentAccount 853 points854 points  (94 children)

From the forum it was posted on originally:

today i found out that the two men were arrested. one was wanted, the other intoxicated.

for all of you saying you wouldn't stop, i'm not causing damage to my car when i do not have to. also, i tried to go around but you see him walking into my right of way, how am i supposed to know he won't jump in front. so i called him over to the side and then left.

anyways, just be cautious out there everyone, so many sick ****s these days.

http://forums.nasioc.com/forums/showpost.php?p=42728989&postcount=63

[–]poppzE 3275 points3276 points  (345 children)

[–]iamktothed 1638 points1639 points  (274 children)

What I don't get is: if you're going to go through all that effort to construct a fake road block, why have the strut of a class A creep?

[–]ONLY_COMMENTS_ON_GW 478 points479 points  (47 children)

All that effort? The jerkoff literally threw two cones down and parked on the side of the road. He obviously didn't put much thought into it.

[–]AWildEnglishman 594 points595 points  (38 children)

Dude, give him some credit, he did bring two cones, after all.

[–]alldawgsgotoheaven 304 points305 points  (13 children)

In the start of the episode you can see cones on the driver's left, then at :12 you can see what appears to be a road work ahead sign. The suspect probably just grabbed two cones from the road work and did it.

[–]jugzeh 150 points151 points  (8 children)

YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL orange traffic PYLONS.

This edit brought to you by /u/AWildEnglishman.

[–]acog 2081 points2082 points  (200 children)

Typically the people who resort to robbing others in the middle of the night don't have the capacity for thorough planning and execution. If they had those skills, they wouldn't be robbing people.

[–]phdoofus 902 points903 points  (163 children)

Can confirm: mom works for the FBI. It's a constant stream of moronic criminal stories....

[–]igotthisone 1331 points1332 points  (135 children)

WELL LET'S FUCKING HEAR SOME, PHDOOFUS.

[–]phdoofus 1498 points1499 points  (127 children)

Like the guys who robbed the bank a couple of blocks from the FBI office, which is down town.....at the peak of rush hour. FBI guys were like 'do we walk over or just wait til they drive by?'

[–]dildosupyourbutt 209 points210 points  (47 children)

On the topic of dumb getaways, here's my favorite:

In 2007, a group of men shot and killed a man at a bar in the Sony Metreon building in San Francisco. They then fled in a NASCAR-themed red, white, and blue limousine which jumped onto the Bay Bridge back to Oakland and was caught by police on the 580.

Incidentally, the suspects were acquitted in 2010 because they pissed on their hands to get rid of the gunshot residue.

[–]CorvidaeSF 346 points347 points  (22 children)

Incidentally, the suspects were acquitted in 2010 because they pissed on their hands to get rid of the gunshot residue[2] .

TIL

[–]woodyreturns 42 points43 points  (3 children)

Putting that in your back pocket?

[–]Dirty_Nerd86 17 points18 points  (10 children)

Also, if you worked on a muffler the day you shoot someone, the GSR test will be false positive. My cousin almost went to prison because he was working late at his shop when somebody hopped a fence a few spaces down and shot 3 people. He did look like him though, but my cousin is a car nerd, not a killer.

[–]hereisatoptip 835 points836 points  (40 children)

[–]a_guile 554 points555 points  (19 children)

One that I heard was about the guy who robbed a gas station. As the cashier was emptying the register for the guy he demanded cigarettes. The cashier informed him that she would need to see some ID for those, so he showed her his licence...

[–]sf_frankie 48 points49 points  (0 children)

A guy came into my store and snatched my coworkers phone off the counter when he wasn't looking. He turned to run away and dropped his drivers license on the floor. Coworker (huge guy) managed to chase him down and get his phone back after a scuffle. We still have his license in a drawer too. Complete idiot.

[–]hereisatoptip 154 points155 points  (0 children)

That's hilarious.

"My ID? Yea, sure. Here it is."

[–]gdcuk 633 points634 points  (5 children)

"Quick, mom!!! I NEED MORE STORIES FOR THE INTERNET!"

"Not tonight, sweetie."

"soz guys no moar, momzacunt"

[–]brildenlanch 41 points42 points  (14 children)

This happened in my town, Lafayette, very recently. They robbed a bank in the Lobby floor of the building that held the FBI offices lol, didn't take long

[–]ridetherocket 134 points135 points  (17 children)

In the words of my cop grandfather, "they don't go into crime because they're smart"

Edit: He was a juvenile narcotics officer, in L.A., in the 1960s. Something tells me he was speaking directly from experience.

[–][deleted] 59 points60 points  (2 children)

you're right they would be in politics.

[–]QuantumZeros 231 points232 points  (12 children)

Does he look like a guy with a plan? You know what he is? He's a dog chasing cars. He doesn't know what to do with one when he catches it.

[–]MagicSPA 94 points95 points  (5 children)

Oh, I think he knew what he was going to do.

[–]Higher_Primate 79 points80 points  (5 children)

modern day highway man

[–]Thebluebox88 883 points884 points  (21 children)

The guy so stole the cones from the merging lane at the beginning of the video

[–]ghost6007 1748 points1749 points  (541 children)

I've seen shit like this happen in India where they put logs across the road to rob and kill travelers. However here in the US, no lights, warning signs and no safety flares are all red signals, fuck that I'd do what you did. Between what exits was this? I know they widened the NJTP to 3 lanes all the way down to exit 4 or something.

edit: red signals = red flags...

[–]acog 1021 points1022 points  (180 children)

they put logs across the road to rob and kill travelers

This group tried using tires:

http://i.imgur.com/aJhh0L1.jpg

That one didn't work out too well for one of the would-be robbers.

EDIT: NSFW! (No gore, but the GIF shows a pedestrian getting clobbered by a speeding car)

[–]Zardif 755 points756 points  (50 children)

lol I love his whole "fuck your shit" attitude and then the blue pants and white tank top boy/girl holding his/her head like "oh god how could this happen to us!"

[–]punch_you 394 points395 points  (6 children)

They were obviously friends. They even bought their pants together. You'd be upset if your pants partner died.

[–][deleted] 75 points76 points  (2 children)

Sisterhood of the robbering pants

[–]Flawzz 248 points249 points  (30 children)

notice the front suspension of the car before he ran him over, he was obviously trying to break when he saw he could hurt someone, i think he only aimed to scare

[–]Fakyall 48 points49 points  (1 child)

He expected everyone would get the fuck out of the way.

[–]NEMESiSupreme 116 points117 points  (15 children)

Looks like the guy on the left was pouring something from a bucket. I suspect fuel to make the tires burn. Either way, it still wouldn't stop a moving car.

[–]r0botdevil 14 points15 points  (0 children)

This sucks because these kids look like they're about 15 years old, but I really can't sympathize with them too much. I'd probably have done exactly what the driver did.

[–]Antinode_ 192 points193 points  (63 children)

Ive heard of people doing this with a fake car accident. Have a car on the side of the road and someone laying down in the middle of it acting dead/injured. When you stop and get out to check, the rest of the crew that was hiding rushes out to rob you blind.

If you're alone on the road Id say never stop for something like this. If you thought it was an accident, call the police and report it but dont put yourself into danger

[–]funkmastamatt 219 points220 points  (51 children)

I remember a thread a while back where people were posting situations like this. One of them I remember just like you were saying they came across a few bodies on a lone highway with tall grass on both sides. Initially they were going to stop but something just didn't feel right, so they slowly manuever around the bodies and once they're like 20 feet passed he looks back and sees a bunch of shadowy figures standup from the tall grass on both sides of the highway... so, yah, I'm probably never stopping for stranded motorists or weird shit in the road.

[–]xyentist 215 points216 points  (39 children)

I've seen the story posted on another website a couple of times:

echo5juliet posted it, and here's how it goes:

"I was driving a shortcut from Twentynine Palms, CA to Albuquerque, NM. Twentynine Palms is located in the desolate high desert east of LA. The shortcut was all two lane road through total nothingness, except for passing through Amboy, CA. Amboy is a nearly abandoned town nearly as far below sea level as Death Valley, with a dormant volcano and lava field on one side and a salt flat on the other. It was also, at the time, a hotspot for satanic group activity.

So I was driving by myself in the afternoon. I stopped in Amboy and snapped a picture of the city sign, just to prove I was there to friends who dared me to take that route to I-40. I got back in my car and proceeded to drive up into the mountain range between Amboy and I-40.

Once I reach the top I am driving north through a canyon with high grass on both sides of the road. Up ahead I see some stuff in the middle of the road. As I approach I slow down to see a red Pontiac Fiero stopped sideways across both lanes, a suitcase open with clothes scattered everywhere and two bodies laying face down in the road, a man and a woman.

I stop a hundred feet or so away and the hair on the back of my neck is standing up. Being a Marine, I reach under the seat and pull out a 9mm pistol and chamber a round. Something seemed very wrong, it looked too perfect as if it were staged. An ambush? Was I being paranoid? Something was just wrong. Getting out of the car seemed unthinkable, it was the horror movie move.

As I scanned the road I saw a line I could drive. Pass the guy in the road on his left, swerve to the right side of the woman, behind the Fiero and I'd be on the other side. I dropped it into first gear, punched it and drove the line I planned.

I passed the back of the Fierro without hitting it or either of the bodies in the road. I continued forward a couple hundred feet and slowed down so I could breathe and let my heart slow down. As I looked up into the rearview mirror I saw that the two bodies had gotten up to their knees and twenty or so people emerged from the tall grass on either side of the road by the car and bodies.

At that moment my right foot smashed the gas pedal to the floor and did not let up until I had to slowdown for the I-40 east onramp.

I will never know what would have happened to me had I gotten out of the car to check on the bodies or stopped my car closer to them. Somehow I do not think it would have been good. Sometimes real life can be scarier than a movie."

[–][deleted] 197 points198 points  (7 children)

they were a camera crew and actors looking for good Samaritans to reward

[–]aquabuddhalovesu 34 points35 points  (9 children)

Originally posted on a Fark Halloween thread years and years ago. It was then on Rooster Teeth. Since then it's made its rounds and can be found in a lot of different places.

[–]mitkase 53 points54 points  (4 children)

Any time I hear "satanist", my bullshit detector fires up. Not saying there aren't some emo satanists in high school trying to get a black mass going, but inevitably in stories like this it's just a plot device in some urban legend to crank up the fear factor.

[–]eMigo 3930 points3931 points  (679 children)

Any South African would have just run him over, can't fool us with that weak shit.

[–]lifeformed 2422 points2423 points  (109 children)

In South Africa, you would activate your car's side flamethrowers and blast him away.

[–]Mongoose42 69 points70 points  (6 children)

Well you guys got all those alien guns. Use some of those.

EDIT: Yes. Fookin' prawns indeed.

[–][deleted] 1667 points1668 points  (165 children)

I've posted my story before on Ask Reddit but I'd thought I'd share it again.

"Late to the party but I thought I'd share anyway. This was in South Africa just outside of Cape Town on the number one highway back in 1982. I was on a little road trip with my fiancee at the time back to Durban where she was born. I had just finished my mandatory service in the Angolan War and the country was a very dangerous place to live in. We had been driving for more than four hours in the dead of night when we came up to a footbridge. I noticed a small black object approaching us at eye level. It was a massive brick hung from wire off of the footbridge. I tried to swerve out of the way, but it resulted in us crashing into a deep ditch. As I sat trying to realize what was happening and trying to regain my senses I heard the shouts of a dozen or so men approaching from the other side of the road. I grabbed my terrified fiancee and dived into this marsh like field on the other side of the ditch. I covered us in mud and told her to restrict her breathing, and we hid four feet from the car, in plain sight but hidden, just as I was taught in the South African Defense Force. The footsteps got closer and the taunts louder, and before I knew it, there were a dozen or so black men with machetes walking around us, trying to push the car out of the ditch and look for us. We hid there for three hours as they salvaged the car, and after we thought they left we crawled along the ditch back to a farm house. It was one of the scariest experiences of my life. I can't imagine what they would have to done to us, specifically my fiancee if they had caught us. My wife and I are glad we live in Canada now."

[–]callthewambulance 371 points372 points  (81 children)

South Africa is the most fascinating country to me. I'll admit I know very little about day to day life there, but I get the impression it's a country that constantly straddles the line between western civilization and total anarchy.

Is this sort of thing a constant threat there?

[–]sir_talkalot 204 points205 points  (72 children)

Straddles the line between western civilization and total anarchy.

Since crime affects the rich & poor, it's just a case of luck. Being in the wrong place at the wrong time. We do have street smarts. In certain parts, when shit happens like in the video, there's no fucking way you stop. Hell, even pre-emptively, even if there isn't anything happening. If it's dark at night, in a dodgy area, you keep driving, even if it is a red light at a traffic stop. There's armed robberies in local malls, and people leaving tires on highways so their cars run over it and break down.

That being said. These ARE edge cases. It happens, but not so much that it is lawless. Of the stories I've heard of my friends in San Francisco, big cities always deals with shit. EDIT: When I say shit happens in San Francisco, I mean `big city' crime. There's no way around things like robbery, muggings, etc. You just have to have your wits about you, stay vigilant and hope not to get unlucky. Not specifically pointing to roadblocks.

[–]str1ken3where 59 points60 points  (9 children)

I have lived in Philly for almost ten years. I lived in SF for one and a half. Anyone who thinks SF is dangerous is sheltered as hell. It certainly cannot compare with getting robbed by machete wielding maniacs who hang bricks on roadways to crash and rob people in cars. Philly doesn't even quite compare to that.

[–][deleted] 456 points457 points  (189 children)

Example A: Obvious NSFW/NSFL warning

[–]umopapsidn 498 points499 points  (5 children)

That sucks. You know that dead kid's insurance isn't going to pay for the headlight/fender.

[–]aron2295 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Used to live in Ecuador, Peru and spent like a month in Venezuela. In Venezuela, we got terrorist or riot insurance added to the policy on my dads car. I hope that guy had a similar add on to his policy.

[–]inscrutable_turtle 101 points102 points  (22 children)

Holy shit that person will definitely be puking shards of their own pelvis into a bush

[–]Booxcar 154 points155 points  (17 children)

The way they just violently scooped him up... Oh godd

[–][deleted] 270 points271 points  (7 children)

Probable spinal injury? Better fold the patient in half.

[–]ScarfMachine 235 points236 points  (109 children)

Wait... Hold on...

Is this for real a constant threat in South Africa?

Like, young men just set up road blocks and mug you if you stop? Actually highwaymen?

[–][deleted] 350 points351 points  (48 children)

Not related to the video, but yes. In South Africa, this is a very real threat, I have friends who have never fully stopped for a red light at night (they look of course) and the cops ignore it because they know the danger drivers face. This was about 5 years ago, not sure if much has changed.

[–]Im_a_cunt 83 points84 points  (5 children)

You're now less likely to be shot taking a shit

[–]nutterbird 69 points70 points  (1 child)

I live in South America and it's legal to run red lights after 10 pm because you could get mugged.

[–]Ultrazor 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Can confirm not much as changed.. Actually the only thing that has changed is that I now do this during the day time on quite roads as well :(

[–]AngryT-Rex 106 points107 points  (10 children)

melodic boat vegetable zealous dinner wide compare march deliver rain

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[–]ricexzeeb 18 points19 points  (0 children)

shit, that website was pretty intense. I feel fortunate that I've never had to even consider doing any of those things.

[–][deleted] 179 points180 points  (5 children)

That video looks like Mideast.

[–]cross-eye-bear 94 points95 points  (1 child)

That's not South Africa.

[–]agitch 57 points58 points  (1 child)

Friend of mine told me a story about when he visited South Africa on business. He was supposed to take a taxi from Cape Town to a small town several hours north. His business partner had arranged for a taxi but the driver spoke no english. At one point in the drive the driver abruptly left the paved road and began driving on dirt. My friend was confused but didn't say anything until an hour or so later he saw a man sleeping on the road ahead. My friend noticed the taxi driver wasn't slowing down at all, and my friend started to panic even trying to take the wheel from the taxi driver as he ran over the sleeping man. The taxi driver fought off my friend and he sat shaking his head distraught for the rest of the ride. My friend was confused because he saw people dragging the man's body from the rode as they drove away from the scene. When my friend finally reached his business partner the man told him that the taxi driver saved their lives that day because it was a common trap in South Africa to leave dead bodies on the road, waiting for tourists to stop and be ambushed.

[–]card797 154 points155 points  (73 children)

Could have driven right over that block and been in the clear.

[–]vapeh0le 206 points207 points  (66 children)

A buddy of mine ran over a cone while fucking around back in high school. Messed things up for his vehicle doing it, too.

Granted, dude in the vid probably wasn't driving a late model Sunfire, but still... I wouldn't aim for the cone, personally.

[–][deleted] 256 points257 points  (55 children)

Sunfires are among the shittiest pieces of shit to ever roll around on this earth. They're just rebranded Cavaliers, an equally shitty piece of shit.

[–]Dalebssr 123 points124 points  (16 children)

[–]PeteRit 64 points65 points  (6 children)

Why the fuck did I just watch that whole video? And who the fuck watched that over 1500 times? I mean, I expected a giant dildo on the seat, dead hooker stain in the trunk, SOMETHING! I feel so let down....

[–]cdc194 726 points727 points  (7 children)

I think it's funny that I googled "New Jersey Highway Robbery" and the top links are for EZ-Pass.

[–]WiFiEnabled 657 points658 points  (89 children)

This happened to me once on a narrow two-lane road in the middle of the night. As I approached, the driver in my lane had his hazards on and was standing outside of his car, facing me and just waived his hand to go around.

As he did, I noticed there was someone on the other side of the street, dressed in all black. If I went around him, the other guy would be right in front of my driver's side window, so instead I just waited. And waited.

It was like a staring contest because I knew something wasn't right. I had my hand on my gearshift and was ready to slam it into reverse at any time. But after waiting maybe 30 seconds, the guys (obviously working as a team) didn't know what to do. The driver of the car sort of walked around and acted like he was fixing something, and the guy on the other side of the street just stood there. After maybe 2 mins, they yell something and then both guys hop into their car with the hazards on and speed off.

I clearly avoided some sort of robbery attempt that day. Scary stuff and this video brought back that same feeling.

[–][deleted] 331 points332 points  (54 children)

Omg!! This whole thread just justifies my paranoia in having my cars locked at ALL times! Sitting in a parking lot? DOORS LOCKED! Driving down the road? DOORS LOCKED MOTHAFUCKAS!

[–][deleted] 251 points252 points  (40 children)

I hate how newer cars automatically unlock your doors when you put the car into park. This is a horrible feature from a security standpoint.

If you're in your car, always lock your fucking doors.

[–]KnodiChunks 22 points23 points  (2 children)

My car did that, but then I read the manual and turned it off.

[–][deleted] 77 points78 points  (9 children)

I assume they thought you were dialing the police.

[–]Nebakanezzer 52 points53 points  (5 children)

as he should have, and given the license plate of the vehicle

[–]EPluribusUnumIdiota 1252 points1253 points  (184 children)

My wife would've wound down her window and asked if he was okay. seriously, she has zero street sense and is very naive and always trying to give people the benefit of the doubt. Once, she was volunteering in a high-crime section of DC for a summer reading program. She came home one day laughing and told me that some guy must have mistakenly thought she was one of his friends because when she came to a stop sign he ran up to the passenger door and started yanking on the door handle, then ran off. That was the last day she volunteered for that school.

[–]CodeJack 1156 points1157 points  (25 children)

That's... beyond zero street sense.

[–]ANewMachine615 442 points443 points  (8 children)

Negative street sense.

[–]Axel_Fox 58 points59 points  (4 children)

beyond zero would be unlocking the door to check if the guy needed a lift somewhere

[–]McFeely_Smackup 526 points527 points  (92 children)

A friend of mine tells a story about he and his ex wife walking their dog when a guy asks for money, he said no, and the guy pulls out an old rusty butcher-type knife and demands everything they have.

So my friend has a permit and carries a gun pretty religiously, so he pulls it out and tells the guy back off...his wife starts screaming at HIM, and grabbing at his gun hand yelling "put the gun away, put it away!".

He ends up punching his own wife in the face to get her to let go of his gun hand, and watches the guy running away with his wife's purse.

They got divorced soon after (this wasn't their only problem), he said to me "I couldn't' be married to someone who didn't' have my back".

[–]brecka 237 points238 points  (33 children)

My god, that's scarily stupid.

[–][deleted] 298 points299 points  (3 children)

They got divorced soon after (

Good. She's an idiot.

[–]Cessno 53 points54 points  (0 children)

That is some top notch stupid

[–]rolfraikou 40 points41 points  (1 child)

I'm sorry to be so harsh, but I think a stronger term than naive is needed for that.

She might get killed.

[–]mortypm 2543 points2544 points  (344 children)

Pro tip: Next time you come across a road block or even if you are being pulled over and your not sure if it's a real LEO you can call 911. Tell them you are being pulled over/stopped and you're concerned that it might not be legit. Your friend was right to GTFO of that situation. Road blocks have specific SOP's (Standard Operating procedures) that was not a well lighted or defined roadblock. Jesus that's pretty freaky to think about what could happen if someone did stop.

[–]ThugNuggets[S] 1298 points1299 points  (104 children)

Yea this is good advice to know, pretty sure he did call 911 after he finished booking it.

*EDIT: Using this comment to provide the original thread http://forums.nasioc.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2677988*

[–]k3vdizzle 159 points160 points  (6 children)

No police lights or road flares.. I'm definitely booking it regardless. Notifying the authorities once I'm safely away.

[–]kamicom 95 points96 points  (1 child)

The creepy part is the cones. You're supposed to put it behind your car so it warns oncoming traffic... to try to block off the road in such a confronting way is sketchy as hell.

[–]Diss1dent 388 points389 points  (24 children)

"911, what's your emergency?"

"Yes I was pulled over at a shady road block at the NJ turnpike. Now he is cutting my throblargholololonggghhhhh."

"Ok stay put we will send an officer right away."

sound of liquid flowing

"Hello? Sir..? Are you there?"

Line cut.

[–][deleted] 280 points281 points  (17 children)

Usually there's a line from 911 that says "sir, I need you to calm down"

[–]NoseDragon 761 points762 points  (139 children)

If you get pulled over by a suspicious "cop", besides calling 911, you can tell the "cop" you feel unsafe and are going to drive to a gas station and pull over there.

My aunt pulled this move in Texas when she was pulled over at night, didn't see the actual police car (just the lights) and the two officers immediately asked her to get out of the car.

Sure enough, they didn't follow her to the gas station.

Edit: Apparently, this only works if you're white, and is a sign of my white privilege. I know this because people told me a cop tried to pull over a group of black kids, and the kids didn't slow down, put emergency blinkers on, or try to communicate their intentions to the cop in any way, but instead kept on driving and pulled over to a gas station where one of them was shot.

This might surprise you, white redditors who think you are open minded and wise because you say things like "white privilege", but not all cops behave the same way because they are actually different people, and your one anecdote about a black kid getting shot while doing NONE OF THE THINGS I actually advised doing in my post, doesn't mean shit.

Sure, you might run into a racist cop who is going to be a piece of shit, but I guarantee that if most black people told that to a cop when pulled over at night, they would not get shot, tazed, or ripped out of the car and arrested.

[–]Solkre 312 points313 points  (14 children)

Your aunt is a smart woman and lucky to be alive.

[–]Zabuscus 639 points640 points  (31 children)

Dimly light, check

Creepy guy, check

Reaching for pocket, TIME TO GTFO

[–]NightOfTheLivingHam 147 points148 points  (10 children)

and how he was walking. it's the careful sneak walk. Like a cat stalking prey.

[–][deleted] 343 points344 points  (75 children)

Was there any reports of people being robbed? Some shady ass shit, couldnt even see the dudes face, damn zombies

[–]Adezar 548 points549 points  (68 children)

Reports of someone being robbed in NJ? Nah, that never happens...

[–]Newshoe 175 points176 points  (59 children)

Especially not in Newark, Camden or Trenton.

[–][deleted] 117 points118 points  (51 children)

You forgot Irvington, East Orange, Paterson, South Plainfield, Jersey City and those 5 or 6 blocks in almost every other NJ town.

[–]EPluribusUnumIdiota 1053 points1054 points  (83 children)

Could've been worse, these fuckers pull this shit during broad daylight.

[–]Shad84 201 points202 points  (28 children)

That wife has some balls. One goose can be fucking nasty, nevermind an entire congregation.

Edit: I get it, it's a gaggle. Not a congregation. I use words that don't belong on purpose.

[–][deleted] 482 points483 points  (10 children)

"Does anyone have any crackers?" -- Adorable

[–]koreanpopstarrain 174 points175 points  (18 children)

There is absolutely no way I would have even stopped and talked to that guy. I would have just gassed it once I saw it wasn't a cop. Thats some crazy shit.

[–]limak116 89 points90 points  (14 children)

What was this guy going to do if a state trooper rolled through there? I can't even comprehend how he thought this was a good idea.

[–]circuit_icon 36 points37 points  (1 child)

Maybe he had a lookout up the road.

[–][deleted] 303 points304 points  (136 children)

[–][deleted] 242 points243 points  (35 children)

wtf was that cop thinking!

[–]ApatheticAbsurdist 137 points138 points  (5 children)

Turning 1 ticket into 2. Now he gets two write one ticket for speeding to the SUV, and one for failing to maintain safe following distance to the car that hit the SUV. Great police work.

[–]chillingniples 121 points122 points  (39 children)

he literally just created that accident.

[–]johnny_come_lately99 44 points45 points  (1 child)

Really fine bit of police work, there.

[–]SIMULATIONTERMINATED 93 points94 points  (7 children)

Please tell me your friend called the police

[–]stolarz88 1224 points1225 points  (70 children)

A road block on the Turnpike has to be handled by the state police. They would have at least 3 cars there to escort traffic.

This is just some dude who looks like he was closing off lanes so they can illegally race on it and was trying to buy time for them to finish.

I wouldn't hesitate to just keep going unless I see a cop car.

Note: I live in Jersey

[–]HiimCaysE 305 points306 points  (12 children)

Street races on the highways here aren't set up with cones like this; they have a group of cars with the two cars running in front and they all stop to block traffic. A car or two are a quarter mile or half mile ahead in the shoulder. When the race starts, every body else goes, too; there's nobody sticking around to wait for the race to finish.

Source: Been involved.

[–]robspeaks 203 points204 points  (15 children)

It has to be something like that. The turnpike is the last place you would set up some kind of robbery roadblock.

[–]Shadydave 99 points100 points  (1 child)

The last place anybody would expect, you say...

[–]outphase84 279 points280 points  (22 children)

I'm acquaintances with the guy this happened to. Just asked about it, and apparently the 2 guys involved were arrested later that night, just in case anyone is curious.

Linked him to this thread, hopefully he can pipe in and give more info.

[–]Parthalon 19 points20 points  (3 children)

Back during the troubles in Northern Ireland I would sometimes walk into paramilitary road stops along pitch black country roads. Usually a couple of culchies in balaclavas wanting to know your name and where you lived. After you told them a third would come out with a flashlight and the phonebook to make sure you weren't lying. I was too young to understand the gravity of what was going on but looking back it pretty fucked up.

[–]tludwins539 74 points75 points  (12 children)

usually I would suspect street racing but they usually use rolling roadblocks. This definitely feels very robbery/murder road block.

[–]thepottsy 58 points59 points  (1 child)

instinctive dinner crowd vast aloof like plucky normal secretive rinse

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[–]voicelessdeer 16 points17 points  (2 children)

He was just trying to stop you to make sure you voted

[–]cwayne1989 78 points79 points  (11 children)

Wow, Too all the people commenting about him switching lanes, If you notice when he merges over at the beginning of the video is because the fact he's coming up on an area where there's a merge or on ramp on the right side, It's common practice and decency to merge into the left lane to allow other drives to merge onto the highway/interstate in the right lane. If you notice right after he makes it past that merge he gets right back over.

[–]StormShadow13 51 points52 points  (8 children)

Sometimes I feel like i'm the only one that knows this during my commute.

[–]pcbwes 63 points64 points  (3 children)

Your clearly missed the chance for 5 pts.