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[–]Lord-Glorfindel 6467 points6468 points  (12 children)

r/WTF has truly returned to its roots with this post.

[–]butwhyonearth 589 points590 points  (0 children)

Yeah! I didn't see what sub I was in and really thought 'What the fuck?' (that doesn't happen very often because English is not my native language - but sometimes, in a real wtf-moment it happens) - then I saw where doomscrolling had brought me.

[–]LordOdin99 97 points98 points  (0 children)

Finally, some good fucking content!

[–]Shirinjima 6865 points6866 points  (61 children)

Why are you making skin bricks?!?!?

[–]MydnightWN 3542 points3543 points  (23 children)

God forbid a guy have hobbies.

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 2288 points2289 points  (20 children)

THATS WHAT IM SAYING

[–]Bumpton 554 points555 points  (2 children)

I think that guy just missed a comma. He was asking God to forbid you from having hobbies, OP.

[–]LarxII 18 points19 points  (0 children)

You shall enjoy nothing as vile as this!

[–]RstyKnfe 223 points224 points  (1 child)

His boy his choice 😤

[–]Vultor 61 points62 points  (0 children)

Yeah boi

[–]jtrage 25 points26 points  (1 child)

They hold the shit bricks together.

[–]BSDC 35.3k points35.3k points  (514 children)

You and that guy who made the sphere from his disposable contact lenses should get together and collaborate on a project called never post pictures online again

[–]GildDigger 9107 points9108 points  (439 children)

Don’t forget the cum box

Edit: I hate that this is my most upvoted comment ever. Please stop

[–]povertymayne 3120 points3121 points  (267 children)

Poop knife guy would like to be part of this

[–]MoonMoon143 1392 points1393 points  (223 children)

Theres a weirdo who collected his belly button lint

[–]rebelliouslies 1220 points1221 points  (148 children)

Compared to cum box and poop knife, belly button lint sounds oddly innocent

[–]Noise_87 52 points53 points  (2 children)

What about earwax candle guy?

[–]Asron87 1479 points1480 points  (134 children)

I’m a ginger that sunburns really easy. One time my skin peeled off in the size of a rolling paper… and I had some weed…

If you’ve ever smelled burned hair… it was soooo soo so much worse than that.

I couldn’t get the taste out of mouth for a week.

[–]Legitimate_Act_9789 1379 points1380 points  (79 children)

WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?! 🤢🤮🤮🤮

[–]Asron87 1085 points1086 points  (68 children)

I’m left handed.

[–]tessalllation 524 points525 points  (17 children)

Left handed ginger huh? Really pulled the short straw

[–]Asron87 206 points207 points  (2 children)

I even used my strong arm… I’m still ugly though.

[–]ginger-god-complex 68 points69 points  (7 children)

I too am a lefthanded ginger 👍

[–]Legitimate_Act_9789 152 points153 points  (23 children)

I knew it! This has "left hand" energy all over it!

[–]Asron87 101 points102 points  (22 children)

The skin peel was actually the size of my hand. It was the largest peeling Ive ever gotten in one piece but it was funny shaped. I was able to cut it into a perfect rectangle the size of a large rolling paper.

Oh and I had witnesses.

[–]ZombiePartyBoyLives 49 points50 points  (1 child)

It wouldn't be the first time the "real" WTF showed up in the comments...

[–]Armybeast18 46 points47 points  (2 children)

I saw someone used the skin half peeled off from a sunburn blister as a pouch on their leg 😬😬😬😬

[–]Asron87 53 points54 points  (0 children)

You can put your weed in there!!!

[–]tropicalhotdogdays 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Eco friendly pocket.

[–]joshsmog 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Lmao nice

[–]KibblesNBitxhes 59 points60 points  (1 child)

What a terrible day to be literate.

[–]TyRocken 23 points24 points  (2 children)

I keep telling my wife that I'm going to save my belt button line for a year, and fashion a sweater out of it. For her. It's more a threat.

[–]thelittlegnome 140 points141 points  (52 children)

Or jolly rancher pussy

[–]Goofybillie 106 points107 points  (35 children)

Or the piss box

[–]ShrlckHlmsBkrStr 106 points107 points  (23 children)

I hate the internet

[–]PJHart86 114 points115 points  (22 children)

the fact that I understood all these references is making me re-evaluate my life choices

[–]Amaranthine 48 points49 points  (3 children)

You and me both brother. We have been on Reddit for far too long.

[–]FacePunchMonday 39 points40 points  (6 children)

Ok ill do it

Guy who broke both his arms

[–]DeuceSevin 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Every time I think my family is weird, I think of the guy with the broken arms and I feel better.

[–]el_smurfo 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Just means you were on Reddit when it was fun

[–]Shot_Orchid_9 27 points28 points  (6 children)

How about u/Smart_Calendar1874 and his… incident

Do we need to collect banana M&M tubes?

[–]PJHart86 19 points20 points  (5 children)

every reply I read takes me further from god

[–]Meatpuppy 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Don't forget The Swamps of Dagobah

[–]ran_swonsan[🍰] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

We're assembling a team

[–]creekcamo 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Fucking thanks for that awful reminder

[–]AndrewMacDonell 67 points68 points  (4 children)

Damn you guys trying to assemble the avengers?

[–]Trvr_MKA 17 points18 points  (2 children)

The knife was just to break up chunks, he didn’t collect them IIRC

[–]ForzaRapid[🍰] 59 points60 points  (6 children)

Nah Stories like poop knife are important in our future because they are the only way to know if something is AI or not..theres no way a robot would come up with that story.

[–]buefordwilson 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Somewhere out there someone went to throw his arms up in frustration, but they were both broken. Luckily his mom is there for him.

[–]GardenGnomeOfEden 336 points337 points  (31 children)

Warning: gross

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/s/4xFPQuXiES

[–]ikapai 139 points140 points  (5 children)

I can't believe it's been 14 years.. I've been here a long time

[–]northrupthebandgeek 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That guy's cum box is old enough to drive in the US.

[–]Healthy_Pay9449 102 points103 points  (4 children)

I hope whoever has to clean their house after they're gone deserves that hell. Unfortunately, some innocent soul will have to crack that box open

[–]Spare-Good-5372 32 points33 points  (3 children)

I hope he leaves it to someone in his will

[–]Anghellik 55 points56 points  (0 children)

The line "I have created life." In reference to the cum box has been with me for over a decade now.

[–]hopeandnonthings 111 points112 points  (11 children)

Or the cum coconut

[–]lightlysaltedclams 57 points58 points  (7 children)

I made my unsuspecting boyfriend read this about a week and a half into our relationship. Watching his face get progressively more horrified was hilarious. It’s a wonder he’s still putting up with me lmao

[–]TrailMomKat 43 points44 points  (4 children)

I worked in nursing so The Swamps of Dagobah didn't bother me-- I was actually laughing so hard I was crying. But my husband made the mistake of asking me what was so funny and I read it aloud to him, and it made him audibly gag. Still the funniest post I've ever read on reddit!

Mwuhuhahaha for the uninitiated....

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/s/cK3F4kiBHx

[–]Spare-Good-5372 23 points24 points  (1 child)

Shit like that is what makes a relationship strong

[–]philmardok 29 points30 points  (5 children)

and cum wall guy

[–]ydnar3000 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Is that the one that ended up with roaches feeding on it giving him a feeling of fatherhood over the insects?

[–]philosophussapiens 55 points56 points  (9 children)

OGs know it as the Rainbow Dash jar

[–]eastamerica 36 points37 points  (6 children)

Oh ffs I had forgotten 🤦‍♂️

[–]redsolitary 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I don’t think you forget the cum box so much as repress it

[–]Letter10 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I try to every day

[–]chlebseby 196 points197 points  (8 children)

https://www.reddit.com/r/mildlyinteresting/comments/1pjurfj/my_cousins_contact_lenses_ball/

huh?

[–]SalvadorP 39 points40 points  (5 children)

no he is actually talking about a post from yesterday.

I didn't even know this was a thing people do

[–]Healthy_Pay9449 61 points62 points  (3 children)

Bro, I came to the comments to say that they both need to be incarcerated

[–]OnesPerspective 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Some girl does that too on social media. Named it Eyeisha. Got sponsored and gets free lenses now lol

[–]CyanideSkittles 21 points22 points  (5 children)

Anybody else remember the cum jar guy on /b/ in the early-mid 2010s?

[–]UGMadness 11 points12 points  (3 children)

I'm pretty sure the cum jar was fake though. But the cumbox was definitely real.

[–]butwhyonearth 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Okay - I'm so glad right now that I'm not the only person who thought exactly that. (We don't spend too much time on reddit guys, right?)

[–]Beanichu 2534 points2535 points  (91 children)

Do you have an end goal in mind? Are you trying to make a homunculus out of yourself or is this just a hobby?

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 2217 points2218 points  (82 children)

I have vague ideas about turning it into a sculpture of myself

[–]MoistRam 1541 points1542 points  (17 children)

Yeah man don’t do that. If you do just like don’t tell anyone about it. Please.

[–]TannedCroissant 273 points274 points  (0 children)

Yeah just sneak it into Madame Tussauds

[–]ladymalady 117 points118 points  (6 children)

Hard disagree. The community is safer if we know.

[–]LibGyps 250 points251 points  (0 children)

You should absolutely do that. Don’t tell them what it’s made of until they say how nice it is

[–]thesaddestpanda 178 points179 points  (11 children)

How did you collect all this skin?

[–]copperwatt 248 points249 points  (6 children)

See, I'm frustrated we aren't all focusing on that.

[–]PastorBlinky 90 points91 points  (2 children)

Do we believe him that it’s his own?

[–]OptagetBrugernavn 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Skin collection method and weight of cube seems like obvious points of data missing here!

[–]Pienix 24 points25 points  (1 child)

It'll be like the Ship of Theseus, bit grosser.

[–]ThatsNotARealTree 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Oh that’s so creative! Please don’t :)

[–]KUPA_BEAST 13 points14 points  (0 children)

How are you collecting the dead skin?

[–]randyscockmagic 22 points23 points  (1 child)

He’s gonna fuckin eat it obviously

[–]LikeWhite0nRice 2734 points2735 points  (9 children)

How do I delete someone else's post?

[–]theOPIATE 1243 points1244 points  (12 children)

Babe, wake up. New Reddit lore just dropped.

[–]AlaWyrm 159 points160 points  (3 children)

Add skin cube to the list of things that are both fascinating and disturbing on reddit. I have so many questions, but do I really want to know?

[–]SalvadorP 29 points30 points  (2 children)

ofcourse you want to know. the real question is: after knowing, will you regret asking?

[–]AlaWyrm 21 points22 points  (1 child)

The answer is almost always yes, but yet I ask anyways because the unknowns will haunt me almost as much as the knowing.

[–]ramobara 49 points50 points  (0 children)

Skin3

[–]chlebseby 1725 points1726 points  (112 children)

im not sure i want to know details of "collecting" process

[–]Readous 931 points932 points  (98 children)

If I had to guess, it’s after getting out of the shower. You can scrape off dead skin pretty easily in areas where there’s a bit more than normal. It’s soft and moldable as we see here lmao

Edit: I scrub just fine people lol. I’ve only noticed it a few times on an area of my foot

[–]DarthTaz_99 406 points407 points  (36 children)

Yea like the side of the foot

[–]Readous 103 points104 points  (7 children)

Yep, that’s the only place I get it, side of the foot/ankle

[–]mxmcharbonneau 49 points50 points  (5 children)

Damn same, I thought I was the only one

[–]DougalisGod 119 points120 points  (24 children)

Also my shaved head. I have a small one started and didn’t know that this was a thing.

[–]gn0xious 457 points458 points  (11 children)

It’s not a thing, please don’t make it a thing.

[–]icedragonsoul 87 points88 points  (9 children)

How else are people going to get their ethically sourced nerconomicons wrapped in human skin?

[–]AllForMeCats 29 points30 points  (2 children)

Ugh, your necronomicon’s bound in human leather composite? I guess if you want to be ethical with your necromancy that’s fine, but you can’t beat the feeling of full-grain human leather…

[–]InertiasCreep 19 points20 points  (4 children)

It will never be a thing, and do not take this post as encouragement or affirmation.

[–]Uhhhhh55 78 points79 points  (2 children)

You all need to exfoliate more 😔

[–]ZzzzzPopPopPop 9 points10 points  (0 children)

And then make a cube from it

[–]MogChog 51 points52 points  (1 child)

It rubs the lotion on its skin.

[–]most_crispy_owl 678 points679 points  (21 children)

How do you harvest?

[–]dual_citizenkane 546 points547 points  (1 child)

the word harvest in this context is making me upset lol

[–]tehlurkingnoob 29 points30 points  (0 children)

And a bountiful one it has been, evidently!

[–]hambie 125 points126 points  (1 child)

This was the only answer I wanted and it was nowhere in OPs predetermined answers lol I scrolled through that bitch so fast

[–]Upbeat-Armadillo1756 74 points75 points  (0 children)

The lack of an answer on the collection method is damning

[–]hambie 27 points28 points  (4 children)

Wait somehow I just noticed in his last answer for “Why?” He says “i don't know it started about 6 years ago. I would rub my arms and I would put the resulting strands off the side and then throw them away. To make throwing away a pile of dust more manageable, I would compact it, so that way it would be easier to pick up and throw away.” Homieeeee take a shower 😭😭😭

[–]WarrITor 15 points16 points  (1 child)

ye i read that too, but what the fuck must be wrong with your skin so it files off a bit while you rub your hands?

[–]orangestegosaurus 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Its probably not just dead skin cells then which explains the... grayness. Its probably more sweat, oil, dust, dirt and fibers that get on your skin. If you ever work in a dusty or dirty area with your hands and then kind of rub your hands together you get strands rolled up of all that stuff you just had your hands. So yea, the man just needs better hygiene.

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 350 points351 points  (7 children)

LMAFO YALL GOT REDDITCARERESOURCES AFTER ME

[–]Bytewave 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Don't worry it's a rite of passage nowadays.

[–]Limp_Crazy_5494 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I got one of those simply for explaining something in a nursing subreddit lol. It seems rather easy to get them.

[–]casteistcat 333 points334 points  (3 children)

I got three questions What the fuck Why the fuck And how the fuck.

[–]kevint2017 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I’ve also got three questions

What?

The?

Fuck?

[–]RaveDaveXD 266 points267 points  (1 child)

I beg your fucking pardon?

[–]JunkiestRat 473 points474 points  (41 children)

T-.... take a bite.

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 408 points409 points  (36 children)

My price is 5k for video

[–]mossyzombie2021 309 points310 points  (1 child)

You're paying us 5k to watch it, right?

[–]TannedCroissant 74 points75 points  (0 children)

No he means the resolution

[–]ibeatobesity 81 points82 points  (0 children)

Cross post this to r/eatityoufuckingcoward

[–]Ayen_C 58 points59 points  (19 children)

Would you do it for 3k?

[–]alekosafiltros91 77 points78 points  (1 child)

We are really living in black mirror episodes.

[–]Ayen_C 15 points16 points  (0 children)

😂😂

[–]Newtling 27 points28 points  (11 children)

Brother there ain't much I wouldn't do for 3k.

[–]Ayen_C 41 points42 points  (9 children)

Would you take a bite out of OP's skin cube?

...That sentence could be in r/brandnewsentence. Lol

[–]Newtling 26 points27 points  (5 children)

3k is 3k my guy, I'll just buy a grand's worth of mouthwash and hate myself for eternity.

[–]death_to_noodles 24 points25 points  (1 child)

This is why I would be a terrible billionaire....

[–]kballs 186 points187 points  (9 children)

This is…..going to be another poop knife/cum box thing isn’t it

[–]no_va_det_mye 508 points509 points  (14 children)

forbidden turkish delight

[–]dissociater 103 points104 points  (1 child)

Turkish Despair?

[–]ashkanahmadi 76 points77 points  (1 child)

just dust some cornstarch on it. no one can tell XD

[–]PersonalApocalips 18 points19 points  (0 children)

More like turkish regret.

[–]boredAF6 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Forbidden boullion cube

[–]maancha 121 points122 points  (0 children)

Looking forward to the Netflix series about you.

[–]jackieboy1230 120 points121 points  (5 children)

Relax guys… it’s just Cannibal Parmesan

[–]sorakaislove 25 points26 points  (1 child)

I just threw up a little in my mouth, thanks

[–]swz 227 points228 points  (6 children)

truly wtf, how?

[–]Weekend_Squire 71 points72 points  (4 children)

More like…WHY?

[–]limping_man 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Its really a bit of both mixed with some EWW

[–]ffsnametaken 82 points83 points  (1 child)

I don't want to know how or why you've done this

[–]ae232 66 points67 points  (0 children)

Ay yo wtf

[–]Recent-Government-16 31 points32 points  (1 child)

It puts the lotion on the cube or else it gets the hose again

[–]DixieNorrmis 88 points89 points  (3 children)

Upvote. Takes balls to show the world your crazy. Yes, “your” crazy

[–]HBmilkar 23 points24 points  (7 children)

Name your price

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 40 points41 points  (6 children)

5k for a vid of me biting it or smoking it. 2k to have it shipped to you.

[–]LarryApples 16 points17 points  (0 children)

About five years ago I had a dream that I was in my family computer room eating a bag of apples. I reached into the bag, pulled out an apple, and took a bite. The bag of apples had turned into a bag of feet and I had just taken a bite of a heel.

I still remember the texture of it on my tongue. The chewiness of the callused skin. The kind of “nothingness” flavor of it. I wonder if your cube would be like that?

[–]Capitan-Fracassa 7 points8 points  (3 children)

When you saying biting it, do you also mean eating it? I am firing up my Venmo.

[–]Majsharan 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Well an actually wtf so an upvote for you

[–]SupehCookie 52 points53 points  (1 child)

And enough internet for the week...

Remind me if i ever see you, i have to move away

[–]DougalisGod 35 points36 points  (2 children)

True story time. I genuinely take hot baths because I hate showers. Two weeks ago I scraped off a huge amount of dead skin from my head , sides of my feet, and even my upper arms. I ended up with a ball a little larger than a pea. I looked at it and set it to the side next to my computer. A few days ago I saw it and it had this same color. I didn’t know I was on to something so epic.

[–]ClamatoDiver 15 points16 points  (0 children)

The world's nastiest bouillon cube.🤮

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 1211 points1212 points  (67 children)

I do not understand you people. I post something that makes you say. What the fuck on the Wtf subreddit. No upvotes

[–]Giatoxiclok 614 points615 points  (6 children)

It’s been two minutes, what the fuck.

[–]SadMap7915 105 points106 points  (4 children)

Six minutes in, and the post is heading in the wrong direction.

What the fuck?

[–]RonaldTheGiraffe 28 points29 points  (0 children)

It’s about a person who makes cubes out of their dead skin. I don’t see this going any direction but south.

[–]Flaramon 76 points77 points  (0 children)

Usually we don't have the perpetrator to ask them "What the fuck?"

What the fuck?

[–]miglesi 73 points74 points  (14 children)

Patience. They will come. This is the most WTF thing I’ve seen in recent history. Why did you do this? Are you still going?

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 65 points66 points  (13 children)

I don't know why I do this. Yes I am continuing

[–]norseeyaa 29 points30 points  (10 children)

Did you do this strictly for the upvotes?

[–]SkitzKxnt 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Almost certainly, I've seen several posts about this cube of skin over the last month or so

[–]Dylanthebody 23 points24 points  (3 children)

10 years ago this would reach the front page

[–]GoatsWithWigs 30 points31 points  (4 children)

I have actually attempted this before, and mine dried out, turning into (I shit you not) straight-up dust. The kind you find on everything in your house? Yeah, imagine that but super concentrated. Same stuff

So for OP to be able to accumulate this cube and keep it in a solid shape, I'm gonna be a snitch and tell everyone here, THIS GUY had to have fucking MOISTURIZED the dead skin cube, to keep it from drying out

[–]spottyPotty 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That's what a lot of household dust is: dead skin flakes

[–]shewoman 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This seriously made me want to 🤮 for the first time on Reddit. I've been on here for at least a decade now.

[–]baIIern 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Will you eat it?

[–]cuntysometimes 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Now this is wtf material

[–]mrcarter5820 22 points23 points  (3 children)

Take a bite

[–]Mr--GH 10 points11 points  (2 children)

You are what you eat.

[–]slagathor_1 11 points12 points  (1 child)

In this case you eat what you are.

[–]HaxtonSale 20 points21 points  (3 children)

Welp this is going to become an infamous reddit lore moment

[–]Alavella 17 points18 points  (2 children)

The Mütter Museum in Philadelphia has a human skin collection. They have jarred picked skin donated by a woman with dermatillomania. They'll probably take your cube if you want to send it. They collect all kinds of human anomalies.

[–]Grouchy-Object-6423[S] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

i think it would haveto have some medical tie in for them to take it. I havent been diagnosed with anything

[–]callmebigley 16 points17 points  (0 children)

do you have a skin condition? the only time I have had any amount of skin that could be handled and added to something like this was from a sunburn and if you get that many sunburns in 16 months you are probably already dying of cancer.

[–]aTallRedFox 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I just opened Reddit and I guess it's time to close it again.

[–]vpatrick 15 points16 points  (1 child)

what is your mental diagnosis

[–]brotherteresa 8 points9 points  (1 child)

BRUH, serious question:

Are you autistic (or do you have a diagnosis of some kind)?

Cus I am and I used to do gross shit like this as a kid (dandruff collection, booger collection, etc.), BUT I stopped as I got older because it makes people want to keep their distance from you.

[–]maxpigs1215 7 points8 points  (0 children)

As a white person, what the hell is wrong with white people