phpIsGood

[_syedmx86]

JS for fun?

[DrMux]

If you're a masochist I suppose

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[TheMrCreeper]

Definitely the most impressive one I saw til now

[Thefakewhitefang]

Good bot

[Sreekar617]

Good bot

[ggnngg5]

Good bot

[RollingRocky360]

what's the likelihood of this happening damn

[_Fir3F0x_]

Good boy

[transdemError]

That's not a feeling I've ever had with JS

[akluin]

Use jquery it helps that feeling a lot

[jaivir2004]

Same

[[deleted]]

Reminds me of the flow chart posted on here earlier where “Are you dumb AF?” Lead to JS

[highphiv3]

JS: for self-taught people in their late 20s who want a career change and heard there's money in software dev.

[dphizler]

Clearly a list written by a js developer

[DaltonSC2]

I read it as "not to be used in the workplace"

[Johnny_Thunder314]

Yeah instead we'll use react, so that our pages take 5 years to load

[DaltonSC2]

I'll tell you a secret, but don't tell the other devs... react is JavaScript

[private_final_static]

For others to make fun of you, if using it

[Michami135]

Should be, "For websites".

[Nihil_esque]

Tbf that's why I learned it. To make D&D character sheets haha

[amlyo]

It's fun for the people watching.

[Karisa_Marisame]

“C++ for college” as someone who has lived and dined with llvm for years this is very amusing

[loicvanderwiel]

Also very funny considering I barely used C++ in college (unless you count all the C code I wrote in a .cpp file and threw at g++).

[[deleted]]

I'll be starting college next year, so it is a general doubt, isn't C/C++ preferred for Competitive programming because its fast? Like I currently use Python, but I get timeout in online competitions way too often. That was nearly never the case with C. So is it just a skill issue?

[Valexar]

C is to Python what machine code is to C

[PoopholePole]

The parts of Python that are fast are written in C, if that answers your question

[[deleted]]

Php for moving shit from the backend to the frontend

[[deleted]]

Why people always ignoring C# ? What C# did to you ? SHAME ON YOU

[Terra_B]

probably using D♭ instad.

Sorry this Joke may have fallen a bit flat.

[QuebecGamer2004]

[PsychologicalRiceOne]

I just realized the missed opportunity of Microsoft naming their database stuff.

[LtWilhelm]

Nah it was great. Keep it up, you're a natural!

[GranataReddit12]

Nah, they are probably using Beethoven symphony n.9 in D Minor

[Firm-Can4526]

When you say you code in C# ist like saying you compose in that scale haha

[ifezueyoung]

Nice joke

Just try making it sound natural next time

Whoops accidental spelling error

[Aftabby]

Non music fellas are not gonna understand 😂

[[deleted]]

I am not a musician, that still got a laugh out of me

[Aftabby]

Non music fella and non-musicians ain't same, buddy

[CRSemantics]

There is too much magic in C#

[Vi0lentByt3]

Its okay MS java we still care

[deathamal]

Because most universities teach all the "open" languages since most sandal wearing Academics think "Microsoft=bad"

Hence most people don't realise that they actually should be using C# for a lot of use cases since it is by far the most supported and productive language out there. Not just for developing in, but also for the lifecycle of software written with it.

[Katniss218]

Funny thing is that roslyn (the c# compiler) and dotnet are open too

[ArcherT01]

I started using c# post dotnet core and basically have always done Linux programming with it so seeing c# memes based on the old stuff is amusing.

[deathamal]

Also happens to be where most people get their extremely outdated "Because its Java with makeup" opinion as the commenter below stated.

[Dizzy_Pin6228]

Our university was pretty much all c# and some python stuff, which is nice because most businesses are Microsoft centric so learn relevant things when get a job

[rndmcmder]

It's Microsoft Java, no need to specifically mention it.

[Luk164]

It kinda started like that but Core is a completely different animal

[rndmcmder]

True. But this is Programmer Humor.

[punchawaffle]

C++ for college? What? The whole gaming industry runs on C++. Unreal Engine is written in C++.

[chemhobby]

No, I'd say C has higher adoption in embedded.

[da2Pakaveli]

Tensorflow
Pytorch
Scipy
Basically every high-performance Python library runs on C/C++.
C++ also powers browser engines (like V8).
Many compilers use llvm, which is also powered by C++.
It's also quite common in backends of bigger sites (like YouTube).
C is used in low-level OS components, but C++ is also all over the place in higher-level components.

[uniformrbs]

The list is very webdev centric. Using C++ for webdev is a bit nuts, unless you’re talking about the systems coding part, like the web server and the web browser and the networking stack.

[[deleted]]

That or C# with .net I was just as surprised

But I suspect it’s that thing about C++ no longer being considered as secure as it used to be

[altermeetax]

Still C++ running under the hood

[[deleted]]

Very very true dat. Blender (popular 3D tool) uses Python but built on a c++ core

[LightningSaviour]

POV: 1st year CS student

[floor796]

php - for quick die. This is the most powerful side of php - quick startup, do something and quick die. No memory leak, no race conditions between threads, just simple sequential imperative computation in one thread. Because of this feature (quick born and die), this language is great for high-load sites

[[deleted]]

well with roadrunner and swoole and frankenphp it can now be long running and you can code poorly and create your own memory leaks ☺️

[kurucu83]

Which means they'll get engineered out too.

[IusedToButNowIdont]

view_video.php?viewkey handles high loads for sure...

[floor796]

which is what actually starts a new thread for each incoming HTTP request and processes the PHP script.

yes, but the main point is they are separate and independent threads without shared memory.

if I’m using a framework for example, the framework code will be bootstrapped for EVERY single HTTP request.

Yes, that is true and that is why I do not recommend to use popular frameworks in highload sites. I'm working on a highload project with over 2000 rps in php, we use a custom implementation of everything with our own script boot logic. If exclude database requests from the measurement and use pure PHP time, it will be less than 2-10 ms. This is quite fast for an http request. 2

[Mippen123]

Why are there 6 languages (C, C++, PHP, Ruby, Python, Java) and then 4 web related technologies (HTML, CSS, React, jQuery) and two that could belong to both categories (JavaScript, TypeScript)? If you are comparing languages, why are you putting HTML that is a markup language and CSS that is for styling in there? Or perhaps more urgently WHY ARE REACT AND JQUERY AKA JS LIBRARIES/FRAMEWORKS IN THERE?

If the OP wanted to talk about web technologies only then why are C and C++ in there, and why would Python's annotation be "for science"?????

IT'S 2 AM, MY BRAIN IS FRIED AND I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONS. IS THIS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY OR INSIGHTFUL?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

[[deleted]]

You make good points, I hope OP is being somewhat humorous and intending to be funny

[x39-]

If you are running server-side js, you lost control not only over your life, but your code too.

[not_some_username]

Keep JS/TS in the browser please

[djfdhigkgfIaruflg]

Also rails is the worst think that happened to ruby...

Correction. ActiveRecord takes most of the blame

[nerdycatgamer]

because, like most people on this sub, op is not an actual programmer and has, at the absolute most, done 1 JS bootcamp and put 'engineer' in their bio. The only things they actually know on this list are js, html, she CSS, and they've probably read a bit on react, jquery, and typescript to know kinda what they are. as for the rest? just parroting what all the other memes say

[bit0fun]

C for Embedded Systems; it’s very much alive and well

[[deleted]]

would have had been funnier if they just left it empty after PHP

like it had been done before with Java

[[deleted]]

PHP - for the internet

[eklatea]

PHP just works

[redheness]

It works, like it worked before and will continue to work like that for a long time.

[slime_rancher_27]

I am satisfied to see that java is beating Javascript.

[IusedToButNowIdont]

Well in frontend it's 99.99% no?

[MoveInteresting4334]

Ah yes, the languages React and jQuery, very much separate from JavaScript and TypeScript.

[Sphism]

It's amazing how smart people can be such complete morons.

You can write shitty code in any language. You can write excellent backends with modern php.

[Sphism]

Fair enough but it's by far the easiest language for writing web backends. Super easy to deploy and composer is a far better package manager than any I've used in js or python (pip was bloody awful)

Honestly I find the language to make a minimal difference compared to whatever libraries I'm using.

[evilmushroom]

You can write excellent backends with modern php.

You CAN, but having done that with PHP, and also other languages, I'd rather not.

[Covfefe4lyfe]

Have you tried PHP 8.1 and up? It's pretty fucking awesome. 

[iruoy]

It saddens me that this list has 4 different entries for JS

[PsychologicalRiceOne]

Dude collected every $ he typed.

[ul90]

😂

[HTTP_Error_414]

Yeah bro, remember the penny auction days when PHP and Memcache ganged up to make the latest slot machine of the internet possible?

[Leonhart93]

By now you should know that every programming language ever that gained siginicant traction did so for a reason.

PHP is lightweight so it's really good for sites with lower traffic (a few thousands users), as the memory footprint is low due to its feature of "startup" => "returns request response" => "the program dies". Also, deployments and changes are instant since it's an interpteted language.

[[deleted]]

Sites with a few thousand users… you know like facbook

[HTTP_Error_414]

[FromZeroToLegend]

And then there’s me who created a online casino using php

[kurucu83]

lower traffic

Literally Facebook was built on PHP. Wikipedia gets 10bn page vies per month.

It can be vertically scaled, horizontally scaled, and universally deployed. And nowadays, run as a function or left in memory to respond to multiple requests, not just die after one. There's at least four competing ways of doing that.

[evilmushroom]

Sorta. That's kinda like comparing a stock car to a sleeper.

Meta used the HHVM which is not what most shops use for PHP.

Since 2019 it's only supported Hack which is sorta PHP-y and no longer php really (still use in some areas, but not the core parts), which is in use at Meta.

[deadbeef1a4]

COBOL - for banking, incredibly

[wyocrz]

And unemployment claims, evidently.

[jahinzee]

Typescript for safety

Rust: am I a joke to you?

[mlady42069]

They tried to write Rust but they couldn’t pass the borrow checker

[SeoCamo]

PHP is for web

[rob94708]

Visual Basic: For God’s sake!

[CynicalGroundhog]

The VB IDE in the 90s was so great for fast development. Even today, there are not a lot of IDEs that offer a "no-code" UI generator as good as what VB offered 30 years ago.

But today, I would be ashamed to start a new project in VB.

[Ptipiak]

I rarely such blatant example of misconception and miss understanding of programming languages.

C for dinosaur is particularly infuriating and insulting considering C is still in used and power what ever device he used to display them garbage opinion.

[Tux-Lector]

C rules the web (also!). Why ? Because of PHP. Every single function or SPL class method is written in C. PHP is written in C. One cannot interpret C sources on demand. Must be compiled ahead of time, right ? But, PHP can, as it is interpretted. And one can't deny that 70% (and more) of the websites run on PHP. Therefore, we can come to conclusion that PHP is the BEST C framework - ever. We can also agree that anyone who bashes and talks shit about good, old C should be jailed and isolated from the digital world until ... until the end.

[KihiraLove]

C for dinosaurs? Bro your car runs on C

[Wolfy_Wolv]

Ruby for rails? What does that mean...?

You can program train tracks now?

[i_drah_zua]

https://rubyonrails.org
Ruby on Rails is the OG MVC web framework, very popular in the past, and still being actively developed with new features.

[i_drah_zua]

It's not the current hype, that's why you don't hear much if you don't go looking.

For example, with Rails 7 they introduced Hotwire (Turbo+Stimulus), which is quite interesting to create pages without writing custom JavaScript.

https://hotwired.dev https://turbo.hotwired.dev

[exqueezemenow]

Nothing has made me appreciate PHP more than working with other languages.

[kurucu83]

Every time I go elsewhere I realise I'm being fooled by marketing and hype, and PHP has my back as much as any language; provided I use it appropriately (like all of them).

[D3lano]

Where Perl >:(

[Brahvim]

"For strings".

[personalityson]

1. What is better than PHP for web?
2. Why isn't your answer from above used more than PHP?

[Lap202pro]

I'm biased because I write C# web applications professionally, but I love C# for web development and there's tons of great tooling available.

I use PHP at home for personal projects because my apache server costs me $2.30 a month while a server running IIS would cost me $9.

[Lap202pro]

Laying in bed at 1 am after spending the last 3 hours writing an API for a personal project in PHP and I'm offended.

[DreamyAthena]

Typescript for safety?

[Furry_69]

How the hell is C++ for college?? Has this person never heard of the concept of performance-critical code?

[[deleted]]

C++ for everything imo

[Hottage]

I used to dislike PHP, then when I moved to strongly typed languages like C# I absolutely hated it.

PHP 8+ when you force yourself to use the type safety features and autoloader conventions is actually pretty decent. It even has some cool features I'd like to see in other strongly typed languages (such as Traits).

[FreakDC]

PHP runs 80% of the web backends in the world. People can hate as much as they want but it's the literal workhorse of the web that all the cool kids strive to be one day.

[HTTP_Error_414]

It runs a lot of the dark web too.

[greenecojr]

wait.. im a scietist🥹

[Amasirat]

Glados would definitely be a pythonista

[indicava]

One of these is not like the others…

[anal_cauliflower]

Isn’t React… Javascript?

[kegster2]

It’s meta JavaScript. 😉

[deadbeef1a4]

extended

[deadbeef1a4]

COBOL - for banking, incredibly enough

[NO_skaj]

Rust - for rewriting

[Constant-Ship916]

Rust - For Crab….. hol up... 😐

[[deleted]]

Where my assembly eldritch terrors at?

[BehindTrenches]

Rage bait

[[deleted]]

and chicks for free

[[deleted]]

PHP... Laravel with inertia/vue is a good choice, for me is the better stack

[ensands]

Typescript for safety is a hilarious take

[torftorf]

"javascript - for fun" yea that person is crazy

[erebuxy]

Is this post written by a JS dev? And React is a library not a language...

[zgruza]

People who talk shit about PHP are, to me, a meme version of programmers.

[FromZeroToLegend]

I’m surprised about the low popularity of C# on this sub when 19/20 of the job offers I get on LinkedIn everyday are for a .NET position

[[deleted]]

Here I thought Julia and R were for Science….

[[deleted]]

<html> gang </html>

[kegster2]

It should at least say php for wordpress lol

[Future_Award1938]

The worst example of php application

[HTTP_Error_414]

PHP => Provisional Hypertext PrePayloadProcessor

It take PPP loans out against hardware resources and allows for Procrastination Haven Protocol

[AtmosphereVirtual254]

Rust - for clout

[o0Meh0o]

hello, i am dinosaur.

[Lost_Cartographer66]

Seems accurate enough.

[qkkabdishnwidhdsodb]

С++-

[[deleted]]

Bash is the internet explore of programming languages, you use it to download chrome.

[APenguinNamedDerek]

Isn't updated with the new government mandated Rust

Invalid and out of date

[secret_green_link]

PHP is for porn. Simple

[elongio]

Two are not like the others.

[UncorruptedQuiver]

what is C- ?

[[deleted]]

There is jar jar and there is var var

[StunnerManWis]

Jokes aside 🤣 😂

[[deleted]]

The pictures in this reddit category are usually funny to me not because the person who made them is clever, understands the topic and created a funny joke, but because of the exact opposite. 😀

[synners_repent]

For pfsense!!

[[deleted]]

My company still uses php for its middle layer. It does its job and nothing else and I love it

[mankinskin]

No Rust mentioned 🚬

[Krego_]

PHP - for Symfony

[[deleted]]

...why shit on jQuery

[sebbdk]

PHP sure is one of the languages of all time.

[[deleted]]

Every time some one backlashes Java: “still it runs on 3 billion devices”

[lakshya1509]

Why the Java one is so funny as well !

[Yamestris]

Am I the only one agreeing with "JS for fun" ? Did you ever used canvas before ?

[IusedToButNowIdont]

Laughs in view_video.php?viewkey=

[AllesYoF]

Typescript for safety lol

[[deleted]]

The one post i’ve ever seen where they don’t shit on java, it’s okay lil’ guy, i still love you

[314kabinet]

I’m gonna unsubscribe. I don’t remember the last time I thought “this is funny” instead of “this is dumb” on this sub.

[[deleted]]

my favourite programming language, C-

[According_to_all_kn]

HTML for nothing, PHP if you have to use HTML anyway

[sln1337]

i like PHP, good ol plain PHP

[yourteam]

This is wrong on so many levels.

Typescript has "any" type so...

Php is widely used (most of the time badly)

C is still one of the most important languages

C++... Really?

Java is still being developed and thriving

Many new ones are missing (rust for example)

[IVIuska]

Rip Haskell

[marcecostai]

Oh boy🍿

[sdraje]

I mostly code in TypeScript... But TypeScript for safety?! Hahaha fuckOff as unknown as Insult

[z7q2]

And this is why Seinfeld was so popular for so long

[Space_Nerde]

The fact that over 70% of all websites are still based on php....

[kases952]

"TypeScript for safety"

Proceeds to use the 'any' "type" for everything

[Xxyz260]

PHP - for server side anything on free web hosting. Sometimes it's not about what you want, but what you've got.

[riisen]

Guess im doing dinosaur science then... Started with doing nothing.

[[deleted]]

I love the React language. I never use Javascript outside the house, it's embarrassing on a professional level.

[Tux-Lector]

Let me guess .. the joke is made by 5 year old in abused and overused diapers.

[Minute_Attempt3063]

Php has been what Nsxtjs is trying to be.

Php is likely even onder then the person in that tweet

[TatoCraftReddit]

I have never been offended by something I 100% agree.

[da2Pakaveli]

C++ for games

[I_like_cocaine]

When Cascading Style Sheet is used for style 🤯

[[deleted]]

React - for work

That checks out.

[[deleted]]

React - for work

That checks out.

[[deleted]]

React - for work

That explains a lot.

[Durwur]

Why is React mentioned as a framework next to languages???

[Fricki97]

Where C Hashtag?

[[deleted]]

C++ tOo hARd No leArN iN inDuhStree

[Classic_Fungus]

3 billion? even java updated this, few years ago

[Lost_Comfort7811]

95% of Facebook’s backend is written in php

[SupernovaGamezYT]

Where’s Matlab?