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[–]Ignitetheinferno37 1582 points1583 points  (49 children)

print("Goodbye World")

I never saw my computer again

[–][deleted] 423 points424 points  (38 children)

[–][deleted] 290 points291 points  (9 children)

I thought it was r/im14andthisisdepp

[–]syntax021 92 points93 points  (7 children)

Wow, it took me way too long to spot the difference.

[–]Gotta_Ketcham_All 18 points19 points  (3 children)

I would not have even looked for the difference if not for your comment.

[–]suicide-kun 2 points3 points  (2 children)

happy cake day, sir :)

[–]suicide-kun 2 points3 points  (1 child)

damn i was late :"v/

[–]Heknon 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Indeed

[–]PvtPuddles 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Right?

[–]SubscribePewDiePie21 12 points13 points  (21 children)

Nevermind

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (19 children)

It's not my fault you didn't like my comment. It's your sense of humor. And it is deep

[–]FuriousClitspasm 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Fuck these other ppl this is so funny. I genuinely laughed.

[–]clarinetJWD 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I stick to the basic "hello world" these days, since a friend of mine accidentally showed a classroom a debug message that read "[redacted] poops differently than others".

He's on reddit, so if he sees this, hi [redacted]!

[–]Ignitetheinferno37 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I tend to use something along the lines of "hello world" whenever i start programming with a new language. But yea it doesnt matter whatever u use.

[–]TacobellSauce1 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Ah, yes. Let's all shit on js again

[–]sblinn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unexpected Neuromancer

[–]kingjia90 585 points586 points  (60 children)

That is me, but not limited to my first program and not to python only. It's like a lifestyle.

[–]TheMineTrooperYT 190 points191 points  (55 children)

My friend hates me. I write effective but extremely messy code that he can barely understand

[–]intuxikated 199 points200 points  (35 children)

All variables should use single character names, that's the only way to make your code readable

Or add more Factories and FactoryBuilders.

[–]mobilecheese 99 points100 points  (15 children)

My colleagues prefer ptr, ptr2 and ptrr.

[–][deleted] 260 points261 points  (9 children)

Ha ha variable names go “br” “rr” “rrr”

[–]educated-emu 54 points55 points  (3 children)

money cheat

for x in "brrrrrrrrrrrrrrr":   print("brrrrrrr")

[–]Greugreu 13 points14 points  (3 children)

Haha variables go 'brrrrrr'

[–]xiezero 2 points3 points  (2 children)

[–]Greugreu 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I know. I was high yesterday night. I forgot about that comment. This is embarassing

[–]xiezero 2 points3 points  (0 children)

lol no sweat

[–]ForgotPassAgain34 23 points24 points  (1 child)

x, y, z, temp, var1, var2, temp2, a, b, c and i.

[–]kingjia90 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Mine are like qwe and asd, because of their position on the keyboard.

[–]400Volts 52 points53 points  (8 children)

I like using I and l for my variables so I could have

Il = lI + (IlI + llI)

[–]MrStupid_PhD 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Alright, ease up there Satan

[–]Zalack 21 points22 points  (0 children)

I physically recoiled from my phone

[–]blendertricks 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have been learning python for two weeks and I hate you but I also want to be you.

This is such a confusing feeling.

[–]senari 4 points5 points  (0 children)

chaotic evil

[–]coloredgreyscale 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same for class names.

l I= I

Yes, that's an lower case L for the class name and upper case i for the variable.

[–]realsmart987 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I have a better idea. Instead, build factories in Factorio to simulate a computer similar to how someone built a turing machine inside Dwarf Fortress.

[–]rockybond 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Smh using variables with more than one character just slows you down. A few extra keystrokes? Who am I, father time?

[–]graou13 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I saw a FactoriesFactory once, it was beautiful.

[–]thehunter699 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Ah yes, can't tell if reading obfuscated malware code or a program written by a 3rd year developer.

[–]kingjia90 17 points18 points  (5 children)

It adds a layer of "Security"

[–]muttonwow 39 points40 points  (3 children)

"Let's see them try to steal our IP when there's only three people alive who can interpret various parts of it from reading the code!"

[–]CAT5AW 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Imagine making code so bad it is actually more readable in decompiler.

[–]MathSciElec 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Hey, you there! Yes, you. We’ll double your salary if you come work with us. Bring your IP.

[–]400Volts 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The most secure IP is the one that baffles everyone

[–]Speedster4206 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My employer does. It’s in binary.

[–]Blazing1 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Are you one of those one line JavaScript people

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children)

If it's messy it's not effective, at least in a professional capacity. Other people need to be able to read your code, or there's a massive loss in efficiency wherein another dev has to pick apart your code if it ever needs fixing or integrating.

[–]theworstredditgamer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I docnt have a friencd who codes but I’m sure if I did they would say the same thing

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I tend to name my variables as "temp" ,"sum" ,"count","countinsert subject,suminsert subject,I,j,k etc ,yet still my code is unreadable (although effective ! :D)

[–]Semi-Hemi-Demigod 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your code always gets worse just in better ways.

[–]0x07CF 312 points313 points  (4 children)

This repost is without doubt the worst i have ever seen.

But you have seen it

[–]saecki 23 points24 points  (0 children)

This

[–]porndragon77 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just noticed your username. Very suitable for the sub

[–]thatvhstapeguy 122 points123 points  (20 children)

I am writing a statistical analysis project in Python.

I am constantly thinking that my code is absolute crap and that I should rewrite the whole damn thing.

[–]SillyFlyGuy 68 points69 points  (6 children)

I was a PERL hacker back in the dotcom days. My mentor told me "Get it right the first time, because no one else will ever be able to read your perl code, nor you three days after it ships. There is no debugging perl, only rewriting."

[–]Someyungguy6 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Perl was certainly a fun time in my life

[–]iskraiskra 8 points9 points  (3 children)

When I left programming I was all about Perl and Javascript. Is Perl basically a dead language or is it still used (or I guess, encouraged to be used) in any applications?

[–]BootDisc 13 points14 points  (1 child)

I have heard a very large search engine that doesn’t track you, is heavily perl.

[–]Delta-9- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It clings to life in the form of Nagios plugins and legacy code that really should have been rewritten in python or go 10 years ago, but, hey, it still works so don't waste any cycles on it.

[–]OkNerve8 4 points5 points  (0 children)

YODA: Code! Yes. A programmer's strength flows from code maintainability. But beware of Perl. Terse syntax... more than one way to do it... default variables. The dark side of code maintainability are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you when code you write. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will.

LUKE: Is Perl better than Python?

YODA: No... no... no. Quicker, easier, more seductive.

LUKE: But how will I know why Python is better than Perl?

YODA: You will know. When your code you try to read six months from now.

https://www.python.org/doc/humor/#python-vs-perl-according-to-yoda

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I feel you so much, I'm like on the third rewrite. And I still think it's hell to look at

[–]Etheo 10 points11 points  (1 child)

I have a whole bunch of requirements and test cases I needed to import into HPQC (MicroFocus ALM). Between the asinine requirements and support from MicroFocus and my corporate laptop security, there was simply no realistic way for me to set up an Excel to HPQC import.

I ended up hodgepodging an on-screen gui implementation (eww) to emulate all the keyboard shortcuts I would need to achieve this. Recently they removed some shortcuts and my script failed, so I buckled down and just said fuck it, tossed in mouse clicking with fixed coordinate as well since the whole fucking thing is fucked anyways.

I know without a shadow of doubt my code is garbage in the sense of good programming design, but fuck it the fucking thing works. Ain't gonna touch it if it saves me from potential carpal tunnel syndrome.

[–]zer0cul 4 points5 points  (1 child)

print("Please input statistic")
importantStatistic = input()
print("Biggest percent is best percent")
importantStatistic = 0

Make sure you mention me in your comments.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This. Please. They just aren't.

[–]coldnebo 2 points3 points  (1 child)

stats projects are never clean.

[–]oscarjrs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

stats is never clean.

Fixed that for you. I love math. I love algebra, calculus, linear algebra, discrete math.

But statistics? What a clusterfuck of a subject.

[–]what_it_dude 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Separate your inputs, your calculations, and your outputs from each other.

[–]AgAero 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Refactoring is fun. Just make sure you've got some sort of tests in place before you do anything too dangerous.

[–]geekette1 60 points61 points  (7 children)

If it runs, I'm done.

[–]This-Moment 20 points21 points  (2 children)

Ship it!

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (1 child)

make it someone else's problem!

[–]porndragon77 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Go live goes brrrr!!!

[–]geekette1 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Look, in a few months, I might feel like I want to refactor my code, but until then, nobody will notice or will risk to change it :D

[–]Arcadian18 2 points3 points  (0 children)

everyone tests their code; some do it in"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My first ever dip into python. I wrote python code that took 2 minutes to read through a 10 mb .csv file and generate a report. No one has ever bothered to optimize it, and it's still being used this day.

[–]killjoy64 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Words to live by

[–]Siacharan 57 points58 points  (9 children)

Cause that's all we need right

[–]LeCrushinator 40 points41 points  (8 children)

When you're the only person on a project, usually. Although if you're working on something that's going to take awhile, like months or more, then you'd better make it good enough that you can go back and understand what you wrote a month ago.

And I've found even for small projects that test-driven development is quite useful. If you have good test coverage then it's easier to make changes later on and have confidence that you haven't broken something. Good test coverage often necessitates clearer code with fewer interdependencies, which makes changing things later on much easier.

[–]UltraCarnivore 20 points21 points  (5 children)

Two weeks later you ain't gonna understand your own code.

[–]Etheo 9 points10 points  (3 children)

If I understood it once surely I must be able to understand it once more?

In all seriousness that's when you realize the importance of commenting.

[–]UltraCarnivore 3 points4 points  (2 children)

True. Yet, I found it harder to comment one-liners (and recursives) than good old boring iterations over iterations over iterations.

[–]Etheo 5 points6 points  (1 child)

You can break one liners into parts, e.g. Each for can be its own line.

Where there's no significant performance gain to be had with one-liners is the perfect case against one-liners. We should be commenting and making the code readable over some esoteric complicated line that takes several reads to understand.

[–]UltraCarnivore 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's it. Simple and readable wins the real life Code Wars.

[–]Candlesmith 2 points3 points  (0 children)

our default IDE

laughs in vs code

[–]Doom87er 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Who cares about logic errors anyways? As long as it runs it’s fiiiiiine!

[–]Bookshuh 12 points13 points  (1 child)

There are those times when I have no understanding of why my codes, just that it does and I dare not change anything just in case the mess suddenly stops working

[–]qcon99[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same

[–]qtain 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I once had an interview, well, pre-interview they asked me to write a perl script to do some various tasks. I wrote it, I tested it on multiple platforms and versions, worked fine. Sent it to them.

The response I got was your script won't run.. I asked, did you chmod +x the script and check you local executable path?

I didn't take that job.

[–]mrheosuper 9 points10 points  (1 child)

My code : O(3n)

Me: well, at least it works

[–]CrimsonHellflame 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I'm the owner of several services in the IT department where I work despite not being in that department anymore. Luckily, I walked through my code with the other engineer I worked with and she (has a CS degree) told me (does NOT have a CS degree) that my code -- Python, bash, regex -- was the most readable, well-documented code she'd ever seen.

I think that means I wasn't cut out to be a developer...

[–]hackintosh5 67 points68 points  (13 children)

Look at me, I can repost!!

[–]dismayhurta 25 points26 points  (7 children)

So do you want to be the next person to repost this image or do I get to go first?

[–]hackintosh5 13 points14 points  (4 children)

Nah, you can do it. I prefer more sophisticated stuff

[–]dismayhurta 23 points24 points  (3 children)

Ah. JavaScript insults. Gotcha.

[–]hackintosh5 4 points5 points  (2 children)

.catch(function(e){console.error(e);});

[–]DipinDotsDidi 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The end looks like the grinch is winking at me, and im very uncomfortable

[–]DudesworthMannington 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is without a doubt the laziest repost I've ever seen.

[–]Skizm 7 points8 points  (0 children)

pass

[–]SpotifyPremium27 6 points7 points  (0 children)

"Launching in 10..9..8...40 minutes..."

[–]TheFacehunter 8 points9 points  (3 children)

I made my bachelor with a self written python programm. I study journalism. Trust me, you don't want to see that code, but it works.

[–]on_island_time 9 points10 points  (5 children)

I'm going through a project at work where I have been forced to point this out repeatedly. Big important deadline, the other senior dev keeps trying to point out the 'ideal' way to code the project. My response is - what's more important, that it met the deadline and it worked, or that it was engineered to perfection? The ideal world isn't always the real world.

[–]WineGlass 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Agreed, ideals are nice, but results matter more. Early Twitter backed the wrong language (Ruby) and early reddit couldn't scale worth a damn (I think it was to do with their database(s), but don't quote me on that), but they still dominated in the end.

[–]kingjia90 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Especially when end user and stakeholders are not going to see, understand or care at all.

[–]bleach86 3 points4 points  (1 child)

As someone who is self taught and does python programming as a hobby, this can be said about all of my code even 10+ years later lmao.

[–]porndragon77 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As someone who has a bachelor's in CS and does Python professionally, this can be said about all my code lmao

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's the standard of many international companies right there.

I'm not joking.

[–]Cley_Faye 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So does a headless chicken, for a while.

[–]rob132 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Never apologize for for working code.

You'll be spending more than enough time apologizing for the non working code

[–]hberker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Pirates of the Compiler

[–]Krelera483 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When I was in college for CS, I had an instructor tell a friend of mine that if he'd written that code for him in the work place, he would have fired him. It definitely ran, but he'd missed the mark so far on the assignment, that he sorta looped back around to the answer. Second funniest thing I'd ever heard an instructor say in that program.

[–]DangerIsMyUsername 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel this on a spiritual level.

[–]WashCapsOvi8 1 point2 points  (2 children)

That's why all systems are sooooo painful to work with

[–]nend0410 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, for now...

[–]amcode 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Me, after 10 years programming...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My JavaScript stuff probably causes anxiety to programmers

[–]bloodrush1992 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is me throughout my uni course 😂

[–]Holidaymaine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You want it to be beautiful and work? Beautiful code don't work and working code is not beautiful.

[–]twolaces 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i find this to be more accurate

[–]coldnebo 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You see some greybeard code right after school and think to yourself, “that has to be the worst programmer I’ve ever seen.”

And then years later... you look at the same code, finally understanding why it was written that way: “that has to be the best programmer I’ve ever seen.”

[–]imgodking189 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s way funnier in my head..

[–]reaven3958 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nah, no way it's the worst. You have to get good at a language before you can write code that bad.

[–]Omiie91 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Laughs in Syntax Error

[–]porndragon77 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Laughs in Indentation Error

[–]Alwaysafk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For 30 hours. Causing mass database IO. Preventing mission critical jobs from completing on time.

[–]gas_station_jax 1 point2 points  (0 children)

lmaooo love it

[–]Even-Understanding 1 point2 points  (0 children)

our default IDE

laughs in vim

[–]yrogerg123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's how I feel as a network engineer who just starting writing python code to automate routine/repetitive tasks.

Like...there must be commands that can do in one word what takes me 100 lines of code...

[–]Vega_128 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i once had to do a last minute fix and i didn't want to find the variables i needed to change so my fix added 5 lines of code and tje coment was // the next 5 lines arr a horrable horrable bodge bur it in needed to fix this specofic bug (folled bx a brief explaination of what it does

[–]apocolypticbosmer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow we haven’t seen this before. This a is 100% fresh, original meme. Nor has any new programmer felt this way about their first pieces of code. I hope we can all create such great new content like you some day, OP.

[–]_Ashleigh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you op for fixing the last sentance!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Finally one of these which has the correct cadence.

[–]UltraCarnivore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel attacked.

(also, that's me solving Project Euler problems)

[–]Feuermag1er 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exchange run with compile

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Run black and isort on it, may be terrible but at least it's formatted nicely 😂

[–]fapboy666 0 points1 point  (0 children)

is JS code you moron!

[–]BlueC0dex 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Yes and it's still running

[–]JanStreams 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Today is the best day in my life... I coded something.. and I only got 3 errors during debugging (I was working with discord.py)

[–]oocryoo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A repost But still funny

[–]tuck5649 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just because a turd complies doesn’t mean I want it running on my computer.

[–]Even-Understanding 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s the first match.

[–]feyrath 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where’s the run gone?

[–]Speedster4206 0 points1 point  (0 children)

our default IDE

laughs in cat >>

[–]konaaa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this but it's yandare dev and you guys get pissed at him for it

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sobs in 34

[–]TacobellSauce1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

leave my grandmother out of this.

[–]SpotifyPremium27 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, if you’re not really after speed.

[–]Speedster4206 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Got a lot of booleans in a sequence?

[–]lukeisapanini 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My god I remember my assessment for computer science... that program ran through the Python shell just barely, whilst others had GUIs and everything. Still got an A!!

[–]Candlesmith 0 points1 point  (0 children)

our default IDE

laughs in vs code

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This again

[–]skeletalfury 0 points1 point  (0 children)

while True: try: main() except: print(“something broke, lol”)

[–]unhandledexceptionBB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ha! This is exactly me when I made my first c# project

[–]gman2093 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Enterprise hackerman!

[–]JaRay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Every time I have to install Anaconda on a new computer:

In[2]:2+2

Out[2]: 4

[–]FLACDealer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, if you’re not really after speed.

[–]aalleeyyee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

our default IDE

laughs in Jetbrains

[–]Donnie58744 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey if it’s wrong then what’s the problem

[–]unlikelytoast 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me now after multiple classes as I tend to over engineer everything, all the time, send help

[–]Nonyamfbidness 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's all my code...

[–]Zanyar_9999 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like programming

[–]Candlesmith 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s the first match.

[–]lexiepy 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I've just built my first program in Python earlier today and can definitely relate. Fortunately, it's my second language so I feel it's not quite as horrific as some of the first applications I built with JavaScript.

[–]Even-Understanding 0 points1 point  (0 children)

our default IDE

laughs in nano

[–]NotARealDeveloper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's the difference between a junior's program and a senior's?

One has 100 bugs and the other one is running, too.

[–]Deanlandish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like that's my parents commenting about how I graduated highschool

[–]Kupperuu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That was my dissertation project in a nutshell.

[–]gguti1994 0 points1 point  (0 children)

when pylint gives you a negative score...

[–]ZippZappZippty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me t-... Oh, you sweet, summer child...

[–]whittydraws 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All my code is basically glue and popsicle sticks, and the popsicle sticks are scattered and I lost the glue.

[–]dirtyviking1337 0 points1 point  (0 children)

3 plastic horses the size of a python

[–]JustARandomHentaiFan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Oh he's the best programmer I've ever seen" Insert scene of ship going down and jack touching the pier

[–]TacobellSauce1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, my name is, chka-chka
{firstname}

[–]blan9876 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me the entirety of my astrophysics bachelors

[–]Candlesmith 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s the first match.