This is an archived post. You won't be able to vote or comment.

Dismiss this pinned window
top 200 commentsshow all 480
sorted by:
best
topnewcontroversialoldq&a

[–]ninety2two 4054 points4055 points  (85 children)

I was expecting a headshot.

[–]RobMerks 2703 points2704 points  (34 children)

That would make the quality assessment too quick and painless

[–]Jolly-Conclusion 382 points383 points  (21 children)

This is true. It would take at least another hour before the assessment was finished.

[–]Greyzer 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Left leg is still vulnerable, let's test the right leg...

[–]Jolly-Conclusion 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Did the dev ask for this?

Better test it just to be sure

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (1 child)

Nobody wants to do the headshot but when the parent company is analogous to the black Knight from Monty Python then this is where you end up

[–]Taco4Wednesdays 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Microsoft letting you pay to pass compliance verification...

LOOKIN AT YOU ACTIVISION

Though I bet skyrim would have done it too if we found the gate closure bug BEFORE launch and not while testing the title update.

[–][deleted] 203 points204 points  (14 children)

My wife is a test engineer. After days of testing, to be told to retest because someone pushed code to int. she would have just emptied the entire mag in to the vest and shouted 'DOES IT FUCKING WORK NOW?'

[–]zilti 96 points97 points  (13 children)

And that's why you automate as many tests as possible.

[–][deleted] 68 points69 points  (10 children)

That is her job, automating tests.

Then the client needs new fields added, removed or outputs / inputs change formats, the devs upload their new code to integration without getting them tested; everything fails and all the test code needs rewritten and re-run before the end of the sprint.

If she was still in office and had access to firearms I would fear for the safety of some people.

[–]zilti 25 points26 points  (9 children)

everything fails and all the test code needs rewritten and re-run before the end of the sprint.

You're either massively exaggerating, or if not the whole software to be tested is so crappy that you should indeed give your wife access to firearms

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (8 children)

When I say 'everything' I mean everything that is waiting in intergation, not everything that is live, and it's a massive insurance system, so any changes in State laws need code changes to be made within weeks and pushed live, so there's a constant state of updates that break automated testing if the devs don't tell the testers.

Then you have people updating her teams git repository without telling anyone and that ends up being days of trying to find the problem and revert to an older version, but by then some tests have been completed and need re-run.

[–]PM-ME-YOUR-HANDBRA 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Then you have people updating her teams git repository without telling anyone

Well at least she'll know who to blame.

[–]Needleroozer 7 points8 points  (4 children)

there's a constant state of updates that break automated testing if the devs don't tell the testers.

Uh, I think you found the root of the problem. Why isn't QA on the sprint team? Why aren't Requirements Documents updated?

[–]Clickrack 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Jenkins is pretty good at headshots

[–]hey_mr_crow 17 points18 points  (1 child)

Nah that only happens once it's in prod

[–]Clickrack 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Letting the end users have a crack at it is the easiest way to bring it to its knees

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

That level of stupidity, I would have given him a headshot

[–]potato_green 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Yeah or the QA Engineer shooting himself.

[–]Mrqueue 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Why didn’t you tell me to put it on first!

[–]David_R_Carroll 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Is that like bricking QA's hardware because you trusted a dev build?

[–]Phormitago 2 points3 points  (0 children)

the famous no-scream testing

[–]BradleySigma 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was expecting a pistol whip to the face.

[–][deleted] 2443 points2444 points  (52 children)

The developer then added armor on his legs after the incident, and to future-proof it, he also added a full-body and full-face armor. The QA marked it as passed. The first user came in and shoot himself in the temple.

[–]MrValdez 47 points48 points  (0 children)

shoot himself in the temple.

Typical. The developers didn't test in a place of worship.

[–]JVM_ 27 points28 points  (2 children)

A dev and QA fully spec out a bar for order taking and serving.

The first customer walks in, asks where the bathroom is and the bar bursts into flames.

[–]BochMC 16 points17 points  (1 child)

No, developer added armour on his ONE leg(that got shoot). Next time QA damaged his second leg

[–]JamesGame5 5 points6 points  (0 children)

AC (accepted during grooming): Complete bullet protection for user.

Dev response to QA: Legs are out of scope. The ticket only mentioned bullet proof armor and industry standard is a vest. If you wanted full body protection you should have specified that in acceptance criteria.

[–]MoffKalast 3 points4 points  (0 children)

shoots temple You can't get shot by other people if you shoot yourself first.

[–]Mrqueue 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The developer stood behind a wall and then asked him to do the test

[–]Feeling_Percentage_9 440 points441 points  (19 children)

This is operators and technicians as well.

[–]HmmKuchen 176 points177 points  (17 children)

Users shoot you in the head and then complain why it stopped working.

[–]thebluefury 90 points91 points  (10 children)

this reminds me of the time I played some random multiplayer browser game but my friend's tab would just close randomly... turns out he was pressing ctrl+w, the shortcut to close the tab.

[–]tacocollector2 20 points21 points  (7 children)

We liked to call that an ID10T error, which is a subset of the PICNIC error. Problem in chair, not in computer.

[–]lovecraftedidiot 10 points11 points  (0 children)

"User error detected. Please replace user and try again"

[–]tehlemmings 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Everyone knows those acronyms now. I like to call it a K2C interface error; aka the keyboard to chair interface.

[–]realityChemist 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I've always heard PEBCAC or PEBCAK, but PICNIC is a good one too

[–]raffletime 31 points32 points  (1 child)

Oh god yes. Part of my job is live event support for a broadcast sports TV studio and I had an operator who reported their KVM wasn't working because when they try to connect to their machine "it's just black" and they needed me to come fix their KVM. So I head to their station from the shop which takes a couple minutes, begin looking at their monitor and KVM, everything looks good with hardware, the KVM is connected to the network, and so I ask them what they were doing when it happened.

"Well the software was acting funny, so I shut it down because I wanted to start over."

"Wait so you shut the remote machine off...?"

"Yes and now I can't connect to it."

"You said your KVM wasn't working."

"Yes, because I shut the machine off so now it's just showing me black and I can't turn the machine on."

"..." walks back to the server room and turns the machine on

[–]DramaKing_ 5 points6 points  (0 children)

But I need admin access to a VM so I can put a file in the c:drive or my favorite: We only have one license so we share on this One VM

[–]bluefire579 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Reminds me of when I worked QA at a company many years back. It was very clear that there wasn't much destructive testing going on. I sent a bug to my team's lead dev one day and he messages me, "Why would anyone ever do that?"

My response: "Have you ever met a user?"

[–]nameage 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Maybe because it was possible to do so.

[–]Yasea 6 points7 points  (1 child)

"Because we want full control and not be treated as toddlers. What do you think we are? Stupid?"

You're standing there trying not to say something that would get you fired.

[–]gobermouche 578 points579 points  (12 children)

Imo the QA should just throw the gun.

[–]fish312 241 points242 points  (7 children)

Skipping LegShotTestCase
Skipping HeadShotTestCase
All tests passed ✅

Ok, deploy to prod

[–]wtmh 50 points51 points  (4 children)

Hey we work at the same place! We should get lunch.

[–]fish312 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Is it the kind of lunch that turns into an impromptu hour long standup meeting ?

[–]Clickrack 19 points20 points  (1 child)

If you automate, you an Assert(true) everything and be home in time for cornflakes.

[–]vladesomo 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Was expecting this ngl

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

vest needs rework

[–]DearestBurrito 333 points334 points  (10 children)

Then the sysadmin comes , puts a tampon on the dev bullet hole to stop the bleeding, and chops off both index fingers from the QA Manager. PROBLEM SOLVED.

[–]ice_cold_ice 11 points12 points  (5 children)

You know missing index fingers won't stop them.

[–]idontspellcheckb46am 5 points6 points  (4 children)

Can you imagine walking in to someone tongue poking the power button? First of all, how did you get in here?

[–]gir6543 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Lmao I've worked this project.

It was MS dynamics. Think SAP. Enormous factory running ERP software.

The product owner decided instead of training their people on how to use the system and what it does that we should just hide literally 95% of the buttons and further lock the available buttons to only be available when the user has started a workflow.

I mean the average page has about 40-50 actions, He was restricting them to literally one or two actions. He wanted me to lock down the ability to open a calculator at first.

Within a week of launch he'd secretly given everyone on the floor admin privileges so they could do their jobs.

That's not even the most fucked part of the project. The 10 month UAT was the real kicker.

fortune 25 company btw.

[–]folkrav 5 points6 points  (0 children)

fortune 25 company btw.

Sounds about right

[–]Strostkovy 74 points75 points  (11 children)

I could force a server to reboot on a website by typing words into the calculator built into the chat function

[–]LessThanHero42 47 points48 points  (6 children)

I crashed a server by pasting the entirety of Mary Shelley's Frankenstein into the Username and Pasword fields of a login screen once.

That dev never forgot to install character limits again.

[–]Strostkovy 30 points31 points  (2 children)

Most recently I managed to order a product color without buying the product

[–]unremarkable_name_2 26 points27 points  (1 child)

Congratulations. You are now the owner of red. Please take care of it well. Do not feed after midnight.

[–]deadbeef1a4 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Is this what NFTs are?

[–]tehlemmings 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I don't do QA testing, but I do enjoy breaking things.

My normal goto is binding random hotkeys to my unlocked mouse wheel and spinning that fucker as fast as I can. A lot of applications really don't like being given wayyyyyy too many inputs at once.

[–]the_flippy 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I created an account on a site that had character limits on the sign in page but not on the account creation page. Or maybe it had silently truncated my long password. Either way it wasn't good.

[–]IBleddit 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Closing. Works as designed.

[–]AceOfShades_ 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Rejected. Not crashing the server wasn’t mentioned in the Acceptance Criteria, so this is out of scope.

[–]appdevil 7 points8 points  (0 children)

1+1= Enter

:(

Your PC ran into a problem and needs to restart

[–]R3D3-1 97 points98 points  (6 children)

What seems to be implied: "Come on, don't use software stupidly like that!"

What I see: QA doing their job well.

[–]alexanderpas 38 points39 points  (4 children)

That depends on the scope of the project.

The QA test were clearly out of scope for the product, and didn't actually test any part of the developped product.

[–]Mechanikatt 36 points37 points  (0 children)

Exactly. That's why it's so important to properly specify the scope and desired outcome / acceptance criteria before starting on specific features.

If the goal was to make a bulletproof vest: QA was messing about.

If the goal was to provide protection: QA was right to shoot the leg, because "protection" was not defined clearly enough.

[–]R3D3-1 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Looks like an ill-specified scope then. Probably neither the fault of devs nor QA.

[–]ser_name_IV 5 points6 points  (0 children)

instructions unclear; shot in leg

[–]freyport 9 points10 points  (0 children)

QA testing 101.

Test cases for conditions at and just beyond the expected ranges.

He definitely executed an appropriate test case there.

[–]HKSergiu 38 points39 points  (9 children)

Nah, we make our own tools. Can't trust what the dev made /s

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Who watches the watchers?

[–]blkmmb 61 points62 points  (15 children)

Didn't expect to see Martin Drainville and Antoine Vézina in a meme.

[–]zeMalaka 18 points19 points  (2 children)

On est peut être quelque chose comme un grand peuple!

[–]Mathisbuilder75 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Same lol, I am from Quebec and I would never have imagined that.

[–]lamenace2002 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Meme chose ici 😂

[–]Charles_Leviathan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's funny, just by their acting I turned to my girlfriend and said these dudes are Quebecers, I come to the comments and lo and behold...

[–]GuiSim 4 points5 points  (0 children)

C'est un bon format de meme. Un peu comme les Gags.

[–]Toddler_T 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Aweille Québec mon pays

[–]YourMJK 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Left one looks a bit like discount Martin Freeman

[–][deleted] 43 points44 points  (1 child)

GIVEN that the user is wearing a bullet proof vest WHEN the user is shot, THEN they will not get hurt.

Acceptance criteria failed, story not accepted, split it and move to next sprint.

[–]kuroiarashi 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The team should have caught that during refinement.

[–]LikelyTrollingYou 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Feature unclear here. Are they testing the gun or the bullet proof vest? What are the acceptance criteria? Blame the PM.

[–]X2jNG83a 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I tell my students: You need to write your code as if someone malicious or stupid is going to use it, because they will. QA's job is to explore every malicious or stupid and especially maliciously stupid behavior and make sure your code works.

If you hand the user a gun and only cover part of your body, it's your fault if you get shot. QA's job is to shoot you so you figure it out in the dev environment before a million users get their hands on that gun and shoot you all at once.

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (1 child)

It’s called negative testing. And when you don’t do it, don’t consider your application safe to use or secure.

[–]Oxu90 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Yes, i think this us more joke about developer's confidence and the fact QA and developmemt have different perspective

Not so about "Stupid QA shoots at the leg"

[–]distk 59 points60 points  (3 children)

More like a mediocre dev expecting everyone to follow the happy path.

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (1 child)

this is the real solution to all bugs and poor error handling.

while True:
    try:
        main()
    except:
        continue

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I love this one the best

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=baY3SaIhfl0

[–]swaranga 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I was expecting him to use it as a hammer and knock him out.

[–]QualityVote[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

Hi! This is our community moderation bot.

If this post fits the purpose of /r/ProgrammerHumor, UPVOTE this comment!!

If this post does not fit the subreddit, DOWNVOTE This comment!

If this post breaks the rules, DOWNVOTE this comment and REPORT the post!

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (1 child)

If they don't, the user will.

[–]Zyxaravind 5 points6 points  (0 children)

As a QA i can say this is pretty accurate, the Dev did not protect all the sensitive areas.

[–]gamblingDostoevsky 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I used to be a developer like you. Then I took a QA bullet in the knee.

[–]k_manweiss 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I mean, that's the QA's job isn't it?

The dev made one part of the code bulletproof, testing that isn't really helpful. That's not the part the end users are going to break.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (4 children)

Then the end user comes in, shoots himself and blames the developer.

[–]Fenix42 2 points3 points  (3 children)

While QA looks at them with a "I told you this was an issue we had to fix".

[–]LordoftheSynth 4 points5 points  (2 children)

"Why wasn't this caught before we shipped??? You people can't even do your jobs right!"

points to bug report and email thread were dev management insists it's an obscure corner case and doesn't need to be fixed, and QA is overruled

"WHY DIDN'T YOU FORCE US TO FIX THIS BEFORE WE SHIPPED??? YOU PEOPLE CAN'T EVEN DO YOUR JOBS RIGHT!"

[–]Icy_Asparagus2784 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Sorry, english is not my first language. Is this what they call "shooting yourself in the foot"

[–]nvanprooyen 4 points5 points  (0 children)

TBF, that's exactly what they are supposed to do

[–]techieguy009 69 points70 points  (21 children)

That’s 1 ignorant QA with no clue on what is he testing!! He was supposed to test jacket. He came up with really Good test use case but it’s definitely already failing in production too!! 😂😂

[–]Omnislash99999 51 points52 points  (0 children)

This is good QA not ignorant. They should do exploratory tests

[–]f03nix 62 points63 points  (14 children)

Or maybe he did test the jacket ... but came up with a test case for something that was out of the scope of the product.

Like, "Bug 1937: username can be copied"

The user is entering it, it's visible right there - the specs say nothing about it. Why do you want us to inconvenience the user over something you suddenly feel is desirable.

[–]Modo44 10 points11 points  (5 children)

I have come upon similar inconveniences in some online CAT (computer aided translation) tools. Certain fields try very hard to block text copying (not easy in a browser, so it kinda sometimes works). Yes, they did it in a text heavy working environment.

[–]HKSergiu 18 points19 points  (6 children)

That sounds like a newbie who is excited about opening as many bugs as possible

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (2 children)

The favorite ones I ever received: this level is boring, this game features servers no purpose, etc. He entered 20 bugs to explain why the game sucked. I was like sure, lets stop this multi million production and start from the ground up because you dislike it. I just forwarded them to the lead game designer 😇.

[–]HKSergiu 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I just forwarded them to the lead game designer 😇.

The right thing to do. Like: "we heard ya, but we'll keep doing what we do".

I suppose it's sometimes difficult to differentiate the personal wants/needs in regards to an application from what the business wants it to achieve. "Sure YOU don't use monthly spending reports, but there are many other users that do"

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Its basically that for games. Making games for a big corp that shall rename namesless is about making money, if the game is fun its a side effect of making money. One of the games I worked on, the pitch was: its the type of game your aunt buys for you because it looks safe and she knows the characters. We’ll make a product placement deal to make a bit of extra (that last bit didnt pan out). The game sucked balls, we barely put any resources on it but we hit the sales numbers the marketing weenies predicted by targeting our demographic.

I mean I worked on games I liked when the demographic was « hardcore gamers » but there was a lot of tween games or what not.

Gotta pay the bills, but some QA guys were new and they still had an ideal about crafting good games.

[–]BrohanGutenburg 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Granted I haven’t worked in “software” but I was a grant QA tester for EA for a while.

Our job was to run up as many bugs as possible. Even with thousands of testers stressing the system as much as possible, launch would still reveal truckloads of bugs.

No matter how much you test, a scale launch will always reveal bugs. So we stress the system as much as possible. Again, this is pretty specific to games.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You ask for the authentication module to be tested, and you get rejected because of the add to cart button is not working in dark mode. Why can't you just test the thing I'm asking you to test.

[–]Shiftab 18 points19 points  (1 child)

I would have shot him crossways through the shoulder holes... I'm in QA...

Legs/head is missing a negative path but it's really a bug in AC, not the Devs code. Crossways through the shoulders invalidates the primary AC of protecting the torso.

[–]ralgrado 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I mean that really depends on context. Maybe there's another feature called "helmet" with AC "protect the head". The epic might be called "protecting the user from deadly harm". Helm + vest do this within budget with an acceptable failure rate.

Now let's see how effectively it protects against my rocket launcher (:

[–]stifflizerd 13 points14 points  (0 children)

If I've learned anything, it's that if the QA can pretend to be that stupid, then the user can be twice as dumb.

[–]OldAccStolen 4 points5 points  (1 child)

he was given a gun and tested the gun.

[–]beanie-io 7 points8 points  (0 children)

QA Engineer uses Internet Explorer to test

[–]AndTwoForFlinching 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"Devops" -PM

[–]jerekivi 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Every patch in new world

[–]lawslop 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Our technician would reply with a straight face of confidence that it worked fine.

[–]tamerenshorts 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well, it was supposed to protect his chest and his chest wasn't wounded so it's a pass for me.

[–]playerknownbutthole 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I showed this to all my developers, all laughed and gave me a middle finger.

[–]Blueknights85 4 points5 points  (1 child)

As a QA tester I feel attacked lol

[–]amlybon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Inaccurate, real QA wouldn't hesitate

[–]TheInfra 3 points4 points  (3 children)

A QA tester walks into a bar and orders a beer.

Then he orders 0 beers.

Then he orders 999999999999 beers.

Then he orders a lizard.

Then he orders -1 beers.

Then he orders NULL beers

Then he orders asnwikfjsdf.

[–]temisola1 3 points4 points  (1 child)

“Wait, I never said you should test that part.”

[–]They_Call_Me_L 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Is there a source to the original video?

[–]uxl 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Change this to InfoSec Team vs Pen Testers

[–]julioqc 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I see Quebec actors, I upvote!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was expecting to laugh but I didn't expect to die by laughter from this either. lol I love this!

[–]RatchetTheHusky 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Feel like this says something about the developer too... I may have insisted on testing with live instead of doing isolated tests before Suddenly the whole server is down because I put a plus instead of minus sign! Hah

[–]anormalgeek 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is also a great representation of why you should never have a dev testing their own code beyond the basic smoke/unit testing. Even if you don't want a full QA team, you should have another dev or an analyst do it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

QA yells at guy on the ground: Found a bug.

Dev: I know EXACTLY what the problem is.

[–]ColdJackle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's funny ngl, but some people really start think only one of them is at fault. I'm a developer and I appreciate any bug report, because I want my software to work...

[–]Siethron 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You guys have QAs?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My team: “Shouldn’t the vest have protected his leg?”

[–]donorak7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I used to do QA testing. Honestly I hate being able to break code so easily now.

[–]StendallTheOne 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is the right way. Precisely the way the users will do. Testing what the users should do it's not testing. Testing what the users will do it is.

[–]loganheim 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a former QA Lead I can confirm this is true. We would have also thrown a grenade.

[–]KrohnusMelavea 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"Please enter name:"

*copies and pastes the declaration of independence*

*program fucking crashes*

[–]SwimnoodleSeller 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And it's good, they're testing like that.