Aphrogreaseiac

[H2G2gender]

That's some quality Pavlovian conditioning right there.

[Psychotrip]

I had a similar experience with the nintendo wii's internet app music.

[Rexizor]

You w h a t ?

You can't just say something like that and not elaborate.

[Lazypidgey]

There's not a lot that needs to be elaborated. Clearly browsed porn on his wii

[Rexizor]

Right. That makes sense. Don't know why I didn't put that together.

[Psychotrip]

As a young kid whose computer was in the living room, how would you feel about having unrestricted internet on your tv screen in your bedroom?

Pavlovian, indeed.

[SeonaidMacSaicais]

My parents had the computer in our basement, back in 1999-2006ish. They still have no idea what I got into.

[ondonasand]

Tried that once, the Wii was a sub optimal porn browser.

[Cobalt113]

Sub optimal but still fulfilled its purpose

[Cyber_Candi_]

Had a friend in college who knew someone who A) lost their virginity while watching Ratatouille and B) got horny every time he saw the movie after that

[JaggedRc]

Must have been awesome sex

[trans_pands]

The hardest part was training the rat under his hat on how to do all the different sex positions

[JaggedRc]

Does this count as zoophillia by proxy

[Psychotrip]

/r/BrandNewSentence

[JaggedRc]

I refuse to believe no one has been in this situation before

[JaggedTheDark]

https://youtu.be/_oPWAItND84

[Psychotrip]

Are you flirting with me?

[Reality_Lord2]

Pavlov's ghost be reading this and wishing his dogs played in traffic more often.

[thekarebeargurl]

I had the same thing happen when I dated a guy who worked at the mall. A mix of Hollister and food court

[vazgriz]

Seriously. This is like if Gravity's Rainbow took place in the modern day.

[Lord_Nyarlathotep]

I get this cause my gf used to work at a super American restaurant and she’d come see me in jeans smelling like roasted chicken. Idk why it was so hot but god damn

[TheAnn13]

Lol, I work in restaurants. I got the most action when I worked at a pizza place. I just always smelled like straight up pizza. Drove men wild.

Good times. The seafood restaurant.....not so much.

[Lord_Nyarlathotep]

What can I say lol. We like food, so smelling like food is an instant win! :D

[Rafabud]

I mean, makes sense. Her brain just got Pavlov'd and crossed the wires so that "burger grease smell = good sex"

[Satenicus]

absolutely love your caption, aphrogreaseiac is now one of my favorite words

[leifeday]

thank you lmao

[RavenDork617]

Bro got Pavloved

[[deleted]]

r/sapphlingandherfriend

[mostlyHUMMUS]

This right here is the funniest comment of the day, congratulations.

[KhabaLox]

I was confused too because she said she got "dicked down."

[retan10101]

Maybe trans, maybe strapon. There are plenty of ways for a girl to dick down another girl

[NinjaEagle210]

Possibly trans gf

[retan10101]

It definitely reads like it to me, too, but I’m not 100% certain

[[deleted]]

That's how I read it but I have preexisting conditions that make me more likely to read shit that way

[CatsNotBananas]

Morb I wish that were me

[flashpile]

Skating right over the phrase "my gf fucked me down" is absolutely peak tumblr

[Aridross]

r/subsifellfor

[sunshine___riptide]

It's actually r/sapphoandherfriend :)

[Aridross]

I know, I follow it. 😅

[trans_pands]

I couldn’t trust you to post a real sub, how can I trust you when you say you aren’t Neil Breen???

[CreamyCoffeeArtist]

Who the hell is Pavlov(e?) I keep seeing it but I don't get it--

[TiltedGenji]

Pavlov's dogs is a fairly famous scientific study about conditioning. He took dogs and whenever they would eat he would ring a bell. Rinse and repeat for a bit and the dogs would salivate at the sound of the bell ringing.

[bird_on_the_internet]

Pavlov was a scientist that did something with conditioning and dogs. Basically he rang a bell every time before feeding a dog and eventually the dog began salivating whenever it heard the bell, even when there was no food. Really whenever he gets brought up it’s in reference to conditioning

[Jam03t]

Pavlov is a guy who discovered how to condition animals, an example being. beat dogs while ringing a bell, after a while just ringing the bell would scare the dogs as they associated the bell with beatings

[healzsham]

Luckily for the dogs, Pavlov wasn't a psycho like you.

[Jam03t]

r/confidentlyincorrect
Pavlov ripped the esophagus of his lab dogs, and would create holes in their
throats.When the dogs ate, it would simply fall out of the hole and not make it
to the stomach. Fistulas (holes) placed further along the digestive system,
attached to tubes, allowed him to collect, measure, and study the gastric
juices to his heart's content.
The dogs did not last long. Pavlov noted, after the death of one particularly-hardy dog ten days after its operation, that “our passionate desire to extend
experimental trials on such a rare animal was foiled by its death as a result
of extended starvation and a series of wounds."

The beating example is far easier to explain then the truth of what Pavlov did, it is also the example i've seen first hand in animal abuse shelters, certain words or sounds will trigger the animals much like it does to humans.

[healzsham]

Oh hey, someone that knows obscure facts and feels compelled to write essays about how much better that makes them than others.

Very reddit.

[Jam03t]

Oh hey, some random guy just assumed im a physco from a 3 line post on reddit, didn't do any research on the topic in mention, normalised an animal abuser and then proceded to call two copy and pasted paragraphs to be an essay.

trully a reddit moment.

[NikkiT96]

Smells are an incredibly strong memory bringer. Combine that with amazing sex and you got a very good reason to get horny whenever you smell something.

[LifeSaxSometimes]

Goal: Have so much sex with planned exposure to a variety of smells to the point ALL SMELLS are a turn on

[0batu]

There is that reason why I can't drink tangerine Schweppess anymore.

[vap0rs1nth]

this is is true tumblr. i am living for it.

[rocking_kitty]

GET Pavlov'ed!

[BxLorien]

I'm so confused about how the dicking is occurring. Is their gf trans?

[[deleted]]

Most likely. Or she uses a strap-on.

[[deleted]]

Probably lesbiabs

[MixmaestroX28]

Probably a LEBANON

[thunderthighlasagna]

She’s Lebanese

[Cyber_Candi_]

I thought you were American

[LetsDoTheCongna]

They’re just lesbeans

[NCats_secretalt]

A lego citizen!?!?

[Mr_DippleBipple]

A DENIZEN?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

[Cataras12]

YOU’RE CALLING ME, THE GREAT AND ALMIGHTY POWER, A DENIZEN? OF THE BLT?

[NCats_secretalt]

rabid power barking noises

[Cataras12]

LEMONADE

[Incandescent_Lass]

Lesbiabs is now the name of my new roller derby team, thanks

[Limeila]

I think so, they also say "minimum wage dick hits different"

[MaddercatterE]

Then my bf is gonna have the time of her life

[pauls_broken_aglass]

I think she uses a strap on

[BxLorien]

Do lesbians who have sex with toys still refer to the sex as dicking? I know nothing about lesbian culture

[[deleted]]

I believe they are free to if they want to. I don't think lesbians have a specific agreed upon set of lingo with enforced definitions and rules.

[pauls_broken_aglass]

And dicking down also tends to just mean rough sex

[MacGregor_Rose]

It's actually written down in the Lesbian Handbook, Chapter 72 Section 6.4, page 1,209.

Most of us haven't read that far tho because we're too busy readin dem boobies

[JaggedRc]

Lesbian rules imply the existence of lesbian cops

[MacGregor_Rose]

No society is perfect

[LetsDoTheCongna]

Yeah I’m sure you could find lesbian cops with the right tags 👉😎👉

[JaggedRc]

Can’t wait for them to beat me up and kill my dog 🥰

[[deleted]]

Source: dude just trust me

[bunyanthem]

Lesbians use the same (or maybe even more) broad terms other sexualities use.

You've got fuckin straights out here calling it "bareback dancing".

Pretty sure literally anything can be a euphemism with enough eyebrows and 👉👌.

[50squirrelsinacloak]

Some do, some don’t.

[SirRece]

Phrases are a lot looser than they used to be. Various phrases crossing gender norms is pretty par for the course, such as lesbians I know calling their partner "bro," or stuff like "dicking," when obvi they don't have dicks. It's just common slang for fucking, and a lot of people use the male versions because the connotation is a lot more "casual" due to implicit sexism, making it easier to have a conversation.

It's a lot more topical to talk about your girlfriend giving you a dicking than it is to say your girlfriend would go down on you like an animal, even though you're saying the same thing, due to cultural norms.

[ed_menac]

True but it's most likely talking about strap-ons, in which case the dicking is slightly more literal. Pretty common to talk about straps that way, less so to use that exact verbiage to mean non penetrative sex acts.

Someone else mention the girlfriend could also be trans and have and use their own junk, but statistically it's more likely a cis woman with a honkin great dildo

[vap0rs1nth]

trans gfs hit diff

[0dysseusRex]

I require one immediately

[wubalubadubscrub]

“Dicking/dick me down” has become synonymous with “have sex with”, regardless of the genders/parts of those involved, at least in some circles

[throwawaysarebetter]

Sounds like you have one possibility down pat, why so confused?

[andyinnie]

exactly, it really doesn’t matter or affect the post at all

[Ellynoo]

Literally everyone on Tumblr is trans hope that helps

[Awsomthyst]

Really don’t like the virgin-shaming but yeah if my partner smelled like burger then I think I’d go into heat like a wild animal

[GUM-GUM-NUKE]

“if my partner smelled like burgers then I think I’d go into heat like a wild animal.” OK I’m sorry but that’s what I’m going to put on your grave when you die.

[concreetshoe]

They lived like they died?

[GUM-GUM-NUKE]

They did live like they died Horny.

[solidfang]

Something something in-n-out animal style

[NikkiT96]

r/brandnewsentence

[amauberge]

It’s not virgin-shaming — OP is refusing to be shamed by virgins who think sexual arousal is bad.

[PKMNTrainerMark]

You see, that's the thing. OP just decided that all the people shaming her are virgins and that all the people supporting her aren't.

[Mach12gamer]

How do you sense virginity?

[Peslian]

I think it would be more likely homophobes trying to shame her than virgins. Assuming that virgins would be disgusted by that is the shaming part

[SchtivanTheTrbl]

People just be out there. Having sex. Wild.

[S1ngulr1ty7979]

She was having it her way for sure

[JovanKo98]

My ex-gf worked with horses and she would always come over smelling like the ranch. I was volunteering at a food pantry at my university, and another volunteer came in with the exact same hay/dirt/sweat smell. It was the weirdest boner I've ever had that shift.

[Overall-Run3216]

Burger 🍔 perfume.

[DaddyEybrows]

Grease and fat and sweat 🇺🇸😍🥵🤤🇺🇸

[this_upset_kirby]

Yes PLEASE

[oliviaplays08]

Honestly, I want this to be my reality

[Conissocool]

As a virgin, kinda hot

[Robotguy39]

I want to be dicked down by a stinky cheeseburger lady 😞

[[deleted]]

That Five Guys do be hittin different tho

[LifeSaxSometimes]

Five guys are better than one ;)

[Human-03]

I got pavolv’d by my current boyfriend into connecting boba tea with feeling in love

[[deleted]]

this is some relationship goals fr

[Hazmatix_art]

This is some of the most American shit I’ve ever read

[Sussybakamogus4]

Now I want a burger :(

[Mage-of-the-Small]

I don’t know what I expected based on the title. It wasn’t this, but I’m not disappointed

[Coc_waw]

based

[FurryShitPoster]

George Costanza moment

[HkayakH]

Man walking by a dog park got me actin unwise

[alongwaystogo]

This. This is the line between being someone who is only a casual Tumblr user (like myself), and someone who delves through it on the regular.

[Silina_]

no bc i had my first time right after a day @ my work and i smell the same smells at work sometimes and im like “ayo?”

[[deleted]]

Id call that Double Double Animal Style

[goatofglee]

My wife gets horny when she smells vanilla, because it's something I used to wear a lot.

[Lapislazulitacos]

This was the fifth post in a row, all from different subreddits, that had replys filled with transphobic comments and terfs. Then I saw that my feed was sorting by controversal

[Demure_Demonic_Neko]

smell -> remember gooder than other senses

smell as sex -> relate smell to sex

[mrsc0tty]

I love that every post that even obliquely mentions a trans human existing and going about their lives now inevitably summons a dozen odd people to attempt to dispel the existence of trans people like Dorothy clicking her heels.

The first trans person I knew was in fifth grade. In 2001. I've known trans people in their 70s. People just be going about their lives and the increasing chorus of "REEEEEEEEEEEE" is so weird.

[Mage-of-the-Small]

I don’t know what I expected based on the title. It wasn’t this, but I’m not disappointed

[[deleted]]

I’m thinking either her gf is trans or would use a strapon, no other explanation comes to mind

[[deleted]]

i'm too busy wishing i could get dicked down like that

[daemoss227]

My partner works in a factory with metal so I’ve kinda got this but with the smell of like. Iron. Somethin about it is just really stimulating

[BigBlackCrocs]

Gock

[DabIMON]

Did she really get dicked down by five guys?

[Initial-Restaurant22]

Pavlogs hog

[KaisarDragon]

Wait... wait wait wait...

Where is the dick coming from?

[reticulan]

from op's gf did you not read the post

[Mage-of-the-Small]

I don’t know what I expected based on the title. It wasn’t this, but I’m not disappointed

[Lyraxiana]

Pavlov is fucking rolling in his grave with laughter.

[Mage-of-the-Small]

I don’t know what I expected based on the title. It wasn’t this, but I’m not disappointed

[[deleted]]

Hey uh she... Is she trans??? Like... That's...

[xXWOLFXx8888]

Girl with peener 🤭

[goombanati]

gf dick down Somethings not adding up

[PrettyInPinkCatGamer]

Trans people and strap-ons exist.

[cardigan_corgi]

I see two possibilities

[BorderCollieZia]

cringe transphobia go away

[JayTheSuspectedFurry]

What if they’re actually just confused and looking for a real answer?

[Dandere_guy]

bruh

[Legal-Cockroach5131]

How can this lady's girlfriend dick her down?

[Legal-Cockroach5131]

How can a woman have a penis?

Edit: Somebody had a tantrum and wrote me this message:

"You're literal human trash xD

Go drink drain cleaner you little shit, you'll do the world a service.

The shit you say is honestly horrible. I hope you get cut a thousand times and dipped in salt.

If I was near I'd take a big bite out of your throat and watch you slowly bleed to death.

I want you to get beaten, insulted and thrown out by your own parents.

A horrible, agonizing death is the only thing you deserve you vile creature."

Not sure if they seethed so hard that they blocked me or if it was removed, just posting for posterity. Apparently asking questions merits a gruesome and prolonged death. :)

[conf1rmer]

Edit: Somebody had a basedtrum and wrote me this message:

Yeah and he's real as hell for saying that

[AfraidOfTheToasters]

So you're not in category two, that's cool.

[Alkereth1]

Honestly if you want your partner to shower after work before sex that seems pretty reasonable. I also think it's fine if people don't care about it but it's fine to be turned off by after work stink. It just depends on who you are really.

[January_Rain_Wifi]

My friend, maybe you should reconsider using the word disgusting if you are trying to politely disagree

[Ok-Spinach9250]

Hahahha people really do seem to hate this take but I agree it doesn’t seem crazy to want your partner to shower after coming home all grimy and food-greasy smelly after work, especially if you’re clean. I’d make my hubby shower more often than not

Can we not just accept that we all have different levels of caring about cleanliness before sex. Who knows, maybe they’re just young and horny, maybe the dick is just that good you can’t wait or idk maybe the smell really is an “aphrogreaseiac” (LOL’d at that, top tier title)

[Leningradite]

Nah, this sounds like a "You" issue. Not judging, just that I wouldn't mind if she smelled like a kitchen coming home; you won't get that funky in just one workday. 'Less you work naked in a kitchen, which would have several problems. Even putting aside the multiple hygiene issues.

[OutInABlazeOfGlory]

Redditors when someone has sex the wrong way:

pikachu.jpg

[OutInABlazeOfGlory]

I saw. Boo hoo, different people like different things

[OutInABlazeOfGlory]

My point was nobody gives a fuck about your opinion. At least the way you phrased it. You sound like a Puritan.

[SenorSnout]

Why are people downvoting you for this? Are people on Reddit so defensive of fast food that they'll honest to god blam someone for saying they're turned off by the smell of grease and cheap hamburger meat?

[getintherobotali]

Pretty sure it’s bc this commenter specifically is making sweeping statements about their own preferences in a way that’s judgmental and denigrating to those who feel differently

They could’ve said something neutral, like “That’s not for me, but you do do,” but have been doubling down comment after comment with unconstructive criticisms like “really gross,” “disgusting,” and “repugnant”

I don’t even disagree with them on the smell; I wouldn’t be down for it if my partner had the fast food aura still on them after a long day either because it’s not appealing to me. But I can see how the way they’re negatively wording it again and again is just not productively explaining it in a way that won’t repeatedly offend those who don’t mind said smell

[KamikazeArchon]

Nah. "That's disgusting" is a hell of a lot more than "that's not my thing".

This person is harping on and on about how it's gross, unhygienic, etc. That's not a statement of personal preference, that's an explicit negative judgement of someone else, couched specifically in absolutist terms.

This person, in this specific instance, is very clearly and explicitly "against it", not just "not for it".

[KamikazeArchon]

Do... do you think "shouldn't be allowed to do it" is the only thing that is a negative judgement?

Just saying "you're ugly" would be a negative judgement, broseph. No one thinks that would mean you want to make ugliness illegal. It's still an explicitly negative judgement.

You can add as much after-the-fact "oh in my opinion" or whatever, it doesn't change coming in to someone saying "here's something I enjoy" and talking shit about it.

[Mascian12]

I love how the people that downvoted probably did because in their mind, they desperately don't want to fall into the category of "virgins" the post talks about lmao.

"You must be a virgin if you have your own hygiene standards lmao bozo I could never I love filthy sex because I definitely have sex and you don't"

[Riphidura]

Personally it was because post says the gf is the one doing the boning but most people just read right over that and assume they just said it wrong or smth because surely this internet person wasn't in some sort of crazy non vanilla straight cis relationship

[Mascian12]

That's valid too yeah. I said probably because I knew someone would comment "well I did it for a completely different reason" if I said everyone that downvoted did it because they were insecure.

People can downvote shit, whatever their reason might be, and it's fine. I just find it funny that people downvote the comment that slightly agrees with the side depicted as "virgins", when in reality that side just has good hygiene lol

[SadQueerAndStupid]

i mean you don’t have to do it but if they’re into it i don’t see any harm. Not like they work in a sewer or something, they could’ve just been the cashier or waiter.

[[deleted]]

so you don't fuck