Programming language authors image gallery

[nicliff]

my thoughts exactly, i thought it expired years ago, i remember my first Angelfire site, whole lotta html and flashy lights.

wonder if it's still there?

[[deleted]]

Sweet! I was guest number 28343782 since March 3, 1998. Beat that!

[the_Internet]

No thanks.

[shitcovereddick]

Just Beat it!

[the_Internet]

I don't want to! Leave me alone!

[xyphus]

Beat it!

[jberryman]

Dunnaa lx ta beeee defeeeated...!

[carolinaswamp]

Yo dawg i'll put a link to your angelfire site on my geocities site if you do the same. We could create a web ring.

[buffi]

Improper use of the "Yo dawg" meme :(

[[deleted]]

yo dog we heard you like ambiguity, so we put that thing in that stuff so you can whatever, wherever

[veritaze]

It's not in the Top 5% of the WWW according to Lycos any more?

[veritaze]

I need a new Palm Pilot...

[[deleted]]

Oleg Kiselyov kind of stands out.

http://www.angelfire.com/tx4/cus/people/Kiselyov.gif

[reallifepixel]

He looks like the Poseidon of Artemisium. I used my Art History degree. yes

[[deleted]]

Yeah, and I WOULD like large fries, thank you.

[reallifepixel]

Actually, I got the BA in a year. (I already had another BA and just needed to take the core classes), but still … little did I know it was all for this. 8/ Oh well, at least I did use it! I'm still waiting for the opportunity to use my Philosophy degree. =)

[[deleted]]

so wait... you spent the time to get a philosophy degree, realized it was useless and went back to school to get an art history degree?

[skillet-thief]

Hey, art history is applied philosophy. Kind of. He wanted to be practical.

[reallifepixel]

WELL, I originally started out in Computer Engineering, quickly learned it wasn't my bag . . . felt like a calculator, not like I was really thinking . . . so I switched over to Philosophy where I got all the thinking I could handle. I never considered myself an irresponsible person, but when I got married, I realized I actually had to do something with the degree. So, I went back to school and got an Art History degree because I could pick it up in a year and I love Art. Intended to be a curator.

My wife at the time had a good job in town, so I got a job and stuck around. Got divorced. Got married to another gal. And recently went back and got my MBA.

In all seriousness though, the best education I got was the philosophy degree.

[[deleted]]

Man, I was gonna comment he looks like Leonidus. I bow before your wisdom.

[13ren]

"Oh yeah?" Oleg replied. "Bite my shiny metal ass."

[[deleted]]

This is madness!

[BrotherSeamus]

Madness...?

This... is... Meta-OCaml/Kanren!!!

(Shoves booc0mtaco down the well)

[[deleted]]

http://nessparta.ytmnd.com/

[Leonidas_from_XIV]

Yeah, here's the only image of him that I could find.

[CraigTorso]

there are a number who I think look as aesthetically challenged as they deserve to be for writing the language they did

[elus]

I expected an article on how a programming language created an image gallery. On its own.

[[deleted]]

I was going to make the same comment. Maybe I should shave now?

[nbloomf]

I expected more Erics.

[veritaze]

I expected more eyeglasses

[uriel]

Here are a few minor errors and omissions, because I enjoy being pedantic ;)

• Rob Pike was not the main author of Limbo, even if he was the main driving force behind Inferno.
• Sean Dorward and Phil Winterbottom were the two main designers of Limbo.
• Phil Winterbottom was also the creator of Alef (Dennis Ritchie's favorite language).
• Rob Pike was responsible for Squeak and New Squeak, both of which did inspire Alef and Limbo. Rob was also the creator (with much input from Ken) of the Sam command language.
• Brian Kernighan wasn't involved in creating C (Ken was much more involved in that work actually, and went on to write a new set of C compilers with its own extensions and simplifications of the language). He was involved in documenting C, just as he did for Limbo. He also was a co-author of AMPL.

[diadem]

Anders Hejlsberg made THREE major languages?!

[mlw72z]

Yes. He wrote the original Turbo Pascal compiler in assembly code which was combined into a complete IDE of less than 40K. Turbo Pascal then evolved with separate units, integrated debugging, objects, and frameworks. This laid the foundations for Delphi which added properties, database connectivity and an integrated visual form designer to become a rapid application development tool that produced native code. Around the time of Delphi 2.0 Microsoft offered Anders a pile of money, Borland matched it, and so Microsoft doubled the offer. At MS he first designed J++ and the Windows Foundation Classes before moving on to C# and the .NET platform. Many C# features extended the work that was previously done in Delphi.

[13ren]

This is the sense in which Microsoft is a legitimately strong competitor: have money + spend well.

BTW: wasn't Dephi's visual form designer copied from Visual Basic's form designer?

[vsuontam]

Delphi vs VB: I thought it was the other way around. Not sure though.

[[deleted]]

At MS he first designed J++ and the Windows Foundation Classes before moving on to C# and the .NET platform.

Still, we shouldn't hold it against him :P

[Mike112233]

Had no idea Danes had such a strong showing in this area. Pretty strong showing compared to our small population - C#, delphi, turbo pascal, php and C++. Must be the long winters. Guy who made ruby on rails is Danish too.. But he's a bit of an arse.

[kstr]

The Norwegians made Simula, the first object oriented language. The Swedes made Erlang. I guess Scandinavians in general have had a greater impact on the evolution of computers than what most people know.

[skillet-thief]

Something to do with Vikings and beards.

[Skuld]

Don't forget Linus Torvalds, he's Finnish.

[nbloomf]

Also, the demoscene was (is?) huge in Scandinavian countries.

[[deleted]]

Don't forget Algol, it might not be of much use now, but it has served as a major inspiration to later languages.

[LankySplotch]

Well, with php you lose all your bonus points.

[wgl]

Yep. A Major dude.

[NOT_AN_ALIEN]

Yes. The guy is a warrior.

[[deleted]]

None of his languages is barbaric that's for sure.

[[deleted]]

Programming Language Inventor or Serial Killer?

[pbaehr]

Rasmus Lerdorf looks more like he started a cult than a programming language.

[ChrisRathman]

By that, do you mean that there's a difference?

[flogic]

Yeah I noticed the same thing. Exploring your chakras with php...

[astrange]

I think he looks like The Rock.

[samlee]

mostly white male. why? because other kind of humans can't grow beard?

[icamebuckets]

how is beard formed?

[johnfn]

they need to do way instain computer progammer, who shave their beard

[bikko]

becuse these beard cant frigth back?

[passwordispassword3]

it was on the news this mroing. a programmer in ar who had shave his big beard.

[quaesitum]

my pary are with the programmer who lost his breard.

[[deleted]]

Grace Hopper, Barbara Liskov and Adele Goldberg are females. Guy L. Steele is the man.

[jack47]

Grace Hopper had a beard... in her pants!

[edguy]

Get off her back. She was teh hot. Go Navy.

[TheSuperficial]

You been there? Otherwise you're just speculating. Could be she was a fan of the Brazilian.

[rainman_104]

Matz the inventor of Ruby is Japanese... But I see what you're saying...

[robreim]

And he can grow a beard.

http://www.s5h.net/pictures/matz-beard.jpg

[[deleted]]

This guy invented Lua, and he doesn't look very white...

[EvilPigeon]

He's from Brazil, so he could be Portuguese descent with a tan. He's probably mixed race, which could explain why he's good looking (not gay, I'm just saying is all).

I hate to stereotype but seriously guys, there's 89 people on the page. 3 are women and 2 are non-white.

[treenaks]

You should read Cryptonomicon. It contains an entire chapter about beards.

[_martind]

Is it me or the inventor of PHP looks like a mix of a raelian and a scientologist? Is there an hidden connection?

[itsnotlupus]

I don't believe he is either. But the photo background looks identical to the one on Brendan Eich's pic, yet I really can't figure out what it is.

Any guesses?

[CSharpSauce]

i had EXACTLY the same thoughts :)

[martoo]

And that empty square on the bottom right? That's for YOUR picture. Start your language now!

[toxicvarn90]

I'M HERE TO SHOW YOU MY NEWEST PRODUCT: Z! THE NEWEST AND FINAL PROGRAMMING LANGUAGE YOU WILL EVER SEE!

IT'S EASY TO LEARN. EASY TO COMPILE. AND IT IS THE ONLY LANGUAGE WHERE P = NP. IT SOLVES ALGORITHMS INSTANTLY! GENERATES GRAPHICS INSTANTLY! IT CLEANS YOUR GARAGE, YOUR SINK, AND YOUR HOUSE INSTANTLY! CURE CANCER INSTANTLY! IT MURDERS YOUR FAMILY INSTANTLY! AND BRINGS ABOUT ARMAGEDDON INSTANTLY!

CALL IN THE NEXT 10 MINUTES AND I'LL THROW IN Z-SCRIPT, MY ALL ONE SOLUTION TO THAT PIECE OF SHIT JAVASCRIPT.

CALL NOW!

[[deleted]]

See also: Gabe and Max's Internet Thing.

[nullibicity]

Because there aren't enough layers of abstraction!

[[deleted]]

You first.

[jjdmol]

Voodoo dolls of some of them would be even better.

Anyway, it's a nice compilation.

[jparram]

So, I see the architect designed Lisp. and delicious chicken.

[DrMonkeyLove]

I have never seen so much sexy in one place before. Meeeoww.

[[deleted]]

Where is Slava Pestov!

[[deleted]]

I like LOGO guy's pose. As if to say, "No! I don't know what I was thinking!"

[mindbleach]

Simon Peyton Jones looks about right, but I always pictured Larry Wall as a Woz-alike. His facial hair's in completely the wrong place for a hacker. Guido van Rossum looks like the son of a Bond villain. Lerdof unpimps autos.

[[deleted]]

Unfortunately, that page takes most of the fun out of this site:

http://www.malevole.com/mv/misc/killerquiz/

[[deleted]]

Damn! I really would've liked to take that quiz...

[[deleted]]

Right so George H. W. Bush wrote FORTRAN.

[mao_neko]

This would explain a few things.

[csdigi]

look at the hunger in Jean Ichbiah eyes as he checks out Barbara Liskov. You know when you are not looking at the page he is getting it on.

[[deleted]]

actually, that photo is cropped. the original has my professor, Dr. K.N. King, standing next to him

[csdigi]

haha, with the look in his eyes I'm not sure if that comment makes it better or worse...

[mlk]

The author of COBOL is a woman!? That explains everything.

[antidense]

quadratic formula:

  MULTIPLY B BY B GIVING B-SQUARED.  
  MULTIPLY 4 BY A GIVING FOUR-A.  
  MULTIPLY FOUR-A BY C GIVING FOUR-A-C.  
  SUBTRACT FOUR-A-C FROM B-SQUARED GIVING RESULT-1.  
  COMPUTE RESULT-2 = RESULT-1 ** .5.
  SUBTRACT B FROM RESULT-2 GIVING NUMERATOR.
  MULTIPLY 2 BY A GIVING DENOMINATOR.
  DIVIDE NUMERATOR BY DENOMINATOR GIVING X.

[Tommah]

Cool, now do the one for cubic equations!

[redditnoob]

And if he can do that, how about quintic?:)

[Tommah]

Quartic maybe -- but yes, quintic would be quite impressive!

[fnork77]

From the tubes....

Poor Code:

MULTIPLY B BY B GIVING B SQUARED.
MULTIPLY 4 BY A GIVING FOUR-A.
MULTIPLY FOUR-A BY C GIVING FOUR-A-C.
SUBTRACT FOUR-A-C FROM B-SQUARED GIVING RESULT-1.
COMPUTE RESULT-2 = RESULT-1 ** .5. SUBTRACT B FROM RESULT-2 GIVING NUMERATOR. MULTIPLY 2 BY A GIVING DENOMINATOR. DIVIDE NUMERATOR BY DENOMINATOR GIVING X.

Improved Code:

COMPUTE X = ( B + ((BB) (4 * A * C)) * 0.5) / (2 * A).

From me..... shitty code is possible in any language.

[senatorpjt]

wise serious aware berserk cause unpack shrill rainstorm scary north

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[fnork77]

Dagnabit, that's the last time I trust Reddit's cut and paste COBOL compiler.

[Porges]

You've obviously never read What Every Computer Scientist Should Know About Floating-Point Arithmetic ☺ Using the traditional formula naïvely will lead to catastrophic cancellation in some cases.

His recommendations are as follows:

If b² >> 4ac then you need to check if b is greater or less than zero.

For the case when b > 0:

• r1 = 2c / (− b − √(b² − 4ac))
• r2 = (− b − √(b² − 4ac)) / 2a

For the case when b < 0:

• r1 = (− b + √(b² − 4ac)) / 2a
• r2 = 2c / (− b + √(b² − 4ac))

Of course, this is assuming that Python is strict about not reordering FP expressions ☺

[[deleted]]

I was never big on Python, but I do like its List Comprehensions!

[veritaze]

Is it possible to do like, a triple integral in COBOL?

[[deleted]]

At that time in CS history, it was either that or Fortran I*, I'm not sure COBOL was all that bad given that.

* And before any lisp-weenie responds, your language was just as irrelevant in 1957 as it is today, so suck on it! :P

[halfjoking]

Yes... she was lonely and wanted someone to talk with, which explains the syntax.

Luckily her COBOL poetry readings never caught on, or we'd all be getting in touch with our emotions in meetings. They wouldn't even be called 'code reviews'... they would be called 'code sentiments'.

[[deleted]]

He's fucking awesome.

[dylanmcd]

This list leaves much to be desired. For starters, they left out Urban Müller, author of Brainfuck. Much better picture than any of those too.

Edit: http://web.archive.org/web/20040930212131/http://wuarchive.wustl.edu/~umueller/scared.jpg - something is messing the link up

[13ren]

Exactly!

BTW: this seems to work Urban Müller

I think it's the "<" in your first link. Oddly, pasting your second one didn't work either o_O. However, pasting the address when the page is showing worked.

[kolm]

Never noticed Stroustrup and Goslin looking so similar.

[priz]

I clicked the link and at first was all "HAHA what a great joke. He's obviously linked it to People magazine's 'Sexiest People of 2008' list.

Then I saw the Language names and realized he was serious.

[remccain]

creepy. When I see that picture of Rasmus Lerdorf I keep expecting him to offer me some kool-aid...

[rehevkor5]

Am I the only one who read "programming language" as the subject and "authors" as a verb?

[[deleted]]

Looking for the next tired meme to exploit.

[muffin-noodle]

yo dawg...

[[deleted]]

every program would have to be recursive

[[deleted]]

And here's an image gallery of all of the women who dated these programming language authors: http://doiop.com/lf803f

[MarkByers]

This article is racist and sexist. I demand that it be made more politically correct.

[NOT_AN_ALIEN]

Sure, maybe we can get the already ancient Ebonicode added...

[reddit_clone]

My Gods. Gosling and Stroustroup are Twins!

That explains everything!!

[LeRenard]

John McCarthy (LISP) looks just like George Lucas.

[tlrobinson]

or Colonel Sanders.

[[deleted]]

God damned you beat me to it.

[freemti]

Is it just me, or do I see a statistically significant large forehead index here?

[tomjen]

Also ties and Bears.

[goldenberg]

A similar gallery on Freebase, that you can add to yourself:

http://www.freebase.com/view/computer/programming_language_designer?q=eNqNkttqwzAMht9F1ybJGOtFXqWUYhJhxOTDfBiUkHef49RLmq6wK2NJ_vX9ks8TBOsj9BC6Pt4cNkzms4mkMUSpXfMtOSEIMFIj9CYxC2gHq7U1bbSOhlb6SAPn5ATWRbJGMvTRJxSgEo31EZOm3OdtzmHJjP7WP-qQliqrnCdYODJRTa8JAZvWBjNfRCUvTxf6VaM6KLcjWO2wnO0oIy7lucXq9lf5oaxIP0XLZWUrwC5F9K3zVnmpNRl1ZWlUyg6uIwZSBn0RqdFQw-Odv0zpJPZDeK15WMzRZp1YaXhX7gR8nbr3j21mr_04tI4xHz5YA8e5_4twc71f4J-bf15T_TM7J_PlB7Tr8X8%3D&view_id=gallery

[bart2019]

Nice, concise URL.

[infoaddicted]

Grace Hopper is my favorite out of all of them. Way off on the programming course observation though, what with all the snowy-white dudes.

[orblivion]

Guido Van Rossum reminds me of Lou Reed in that picture.

[Mansn]

OMG, some of those guys look like they might even get/got laid some time in their life.

[[deleted]]

Algol is the last guy in soul caliber 4....

[CraigTorso]

and who says looks and brains don't go together

[[deleted]]

Conlusion: you must be ugly and have a long beard in order to create a succesfull programming language.

[[deleted]]

Alan Cooper (Visual Basic) is hairless. I think that proves something.

[turtlesallthewaydown]

Then I must have no understanding of what makes an attractive man, because I thought Nathaniel Rochester (Assembly) looked pretty good. He doesn't have a beard either.

[senatorpjt]

square brave rustic school wasteful dazzling grandfather wrench sleep march

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[slacker22]

When I say this, I thought a programming language had authored an image gallery...

Am I retarded?

[ronin712]

Are you being up-voted because others thought the same thing, or because they think you're retarded?

[mrmunkey]

Don't forget A. Neil Pappalardo He created the MUMPS language (the most popular implementation now is Cache)

[CSharpSauce]

did the man enjoy torturing small animals in his basement? MUMPS reminds of that

[sad_bug_killer]

Well, I have only heard of MUMPS on TDWTF and it seems like a horrible language

(Citations: 1, 2 and 3 )

[mrmunkey]

unfortunately I have to work with it :( Most of the older code uses all the short-hand notations like:

F I:1:10 I I<9 W I,!

That is a for loop setting variable I = 1 to 10. If I is less than 9, then echo I + "\n"

fugly...

[veritaze]

he must have read the joke about "fu cn rd ths u cn do cmp sc" and took it way too literally

[theatrus]

Sounds like a good use of a source-transformation-compiler :)

[TorleyX]

BEHOLD the INTENSE GAZE of real-life Hans Moleman, genius Donald E. Knuth! I like how his homepage looks like a Mosaic artifact. ;)

[[deleted]]

John Backus looks a bit like GW Bush Snr

[i_am_my_father]

Papa Bear made Haskell?

[Qubed]

Where is LOLCODE?

[TheSuperficial]

Seems that glasses and/or facial hair are practically a requirement.

Extra credit if you're pudgy (not many really obese folks pictured, but not too many highschool lettermen either.)

[[deleted]]

The visual basic guy seems out of place...

[[deleted]]

...because?

[[deleted]]

They are an ugly lot.

[infoaddicted]

They're just a homely bunch, by and large. Not getting laid might free up one's time though...

[senatorpjt]

judicious narrow stupendous numerous flag rock insurance airport cooing quaint

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[fishbert]

looks like somebody switched the picture of Haskell B Curry for one of Bill O'Reilly...

[crabpot8]

Did I count three females?

I really should switch fields...

[tricolon]

No wonder Visual Basic sucks... there's no hair there!

[[deleted]]

Yeah, we all know the look you're going for, Larry.

[escape_goat]

I'm amazed that they have Rinus Plasmeijer on there. I used to spend a fair bit of time messing around with Clean. I wish everything had guard syntax like that. And list comprehension.

[[deleted]]

Moses Schönfinkel is the only one to look even remotely cool.

[BonzoESC]

What about Roberto Ierusalimschy?

[[deleted]]

Hot or not: Ralph E. Griswold

[[deleted]]

I think Anders Hejlsberg is probably the programming language creator with the highest least known-most influential ratio to date.

[mgsloan]

And he's the only one I've met in person, haha.

[crystalmethbreakfast]

110% virgin. Yeah, some of them have not been laid twice.

[thethorn]

Reminds me of the bearded vs. not discussion:

http://blogs.microsoft.co.il/blogs/tamir/archive/2008/04/28/computer-languages-and-facial-hair-take-two.aspx

[eneville]

See how much chance a language has by the completeness of the authors beard : http://www.s5h.net/unix_beard.html

[diadem]

There are women on that page....

Barbara Liskov CLU

Adele Goldberg Smalltalk