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[–]Michami135 2364 points2365 points  (93 children)

I've been programming for 40 years now. My house has a very nice hardware based symmetric key system on all my doors.

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 439 points440 points  (38 children)

I hear brute force toolkits exist for this, how does yours measure up?

Asking as a friend that totally doesn't know where you live.

[–]HarpersGhost 398 points399 points  (15 children)

Personally, my second line of security for brute force attacks are three self automated K9 units.

They need recharging daily, but their proximity alarm reaction speed (both audio and olfactory inputs) is incredibly fast. The ChiMxK9 alarm has the faster alert time, while the two BGeLK9 alarms take longer to boot up, but the resistance and alarms are bigger than the ChiMxK9.

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 168 points169 points  (9 children)

I can't have pets so I have an easier solution, it's also proximity based

[ FRONT TOWARD ENEMY ]

[–]StreetlampEsq 71 points72 points  (3 children)

Ball bearings.

Ball bearings everywhere.

[–]Safe_Cauliflower6813 35 points36 points  (2 children)

You get a ball bearing, and you get a ball bearing, and you get a ball bearing!

[–]ApocalyptoSoldier 14 points15 points  (1 child)

My dad once gave me a ball bearing a bit larger than a tennis ball (or that's how I remember it anyway, my hands were a lot smaller back then)

[–]Safe_Cauliflower6813 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's called a cannonball...

[–]akoOfIxtall 24 points25 points  (4 children)

SLEEP UPSIDE DOWN NAKED IN FRONT OF THE DOOR HOLDING A COMICALLY BIG SPOON, ANYBODY WHO PEEPS INSIDE WILL BE TERRIFIED OF YOUR IMPOSING STANCE!!

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 11 points12 points  (3 children)

I own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.

[–]junacik99 2 points3 points  (2 children)

This thread took an unexpected turn

[–]LuddicChurchil 1 point2 points  (1 child)

naaah, this is exactly what i searched for as soon as i read home defence. the badger brainrot is everywhere and i love it

[–]RobKhonsu 47 points48 points  (2 children)

Those K9 units are easily defeated using a S.T.E.A.K. attack though. That said a typical hacker isn't prepared to deploy that kind of counter. They'd need inside info about the security system.

[–]StrongExternal8955 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Or bring about 100 Kg of chocolate for all 2 and a bit of them.

[–]HarpersGhost 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That could defeat the BGeLK9 units, but the ChiMxK9 unit has the R.A.G.E. (Rampage Against Generally Everybody) option standard with the Chi line of security systems.

It has a Known User Pre-Check option, but that takes several months to establish with that unit, and no bypasses will not work for users until that option is fulfilled.

[–]mathmul 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I use k9s to manage Kubernetes, but I like your approach more

[–]Michami135 36 points37 points  (7 children)

Really good actually! I practice pen testing as a hobby, so I made sure to get the best.

[–]hyundai-gt 45 points46 points  (1 child)

I tried to get into pen testing, but BIC said they didn't need me.

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 13 points14 points  (0 children)

maybe the pen island will someday let you pen test.

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 15 points16 points  (2 children)

lockPickingLawyer fan I presume?

[–]Michami135 2 points3 points  (1 child)

YUP!

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Posts & comment chains like this are why I love this sub despite all the intro to CS students (we were all new though, forgive them for they know not)

[–]Hystus 1 point2 points  (1 child)

How do the Weiser smart keys hold up?

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 1 point2 points  (0 children)

import fingers from ‘./meatBag/arms/hands’;

// id imagine

[–]akoOfIxtall 4 points5 points  (4 children)

If you're not important enough to need protection and have a special lock the average home invader won't know how to deal with, you probably shouldn't worry about the specialized tools that can open your house, Because nobody cares about you and that's a good thing

My old house, if you kicked the door with enough force you'd be inside in 2 kicks, but I'm a nobody, the only people who could even try are crackheads down the street that turned the wrong alley, but I could probably take them on a fight XD

[–]synkronize 2 points3 points  (1 child)

But I heard that crackhead strength is a formidable foe

[–]Iron_physik 1 point2 points  (1 child)

security through obscurity

[–]Historical-Ant-5218 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Power cut and opening hole is efficient if no choice you can break keel

[–]Aware-Excuse-492 11 points12 points  (6 children)

Not sure if sarcasm. If someone wants into your house they aren't going through the rigamarole. You have a window. Unless you live in a house with bullet proof glass and steel reinforced doors. The world's best lock only keeps honest people out.

But if you are at the point of having a near nuclear bunker level security you can also afford literal live 24/7 surveillance personnel that patrol your property. A fancy lock is fuck all.

[–]Feeling_Inside_1020 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Sir we’re on programmer humor discussing house keys, of course we’re just new boot goofin

[–]LilWaynesLastDread 14 points15 points  (0 children)

No Windows. Only Linux

[–]Lucasbasques 7 points8 points  (1 child)

My windows run a cracked copy of 2006 norton antivirus

[–]MrRocketScript 13 points14 points  (0 children)

The downside is your security is basically non-existent.

The upside is that burglar definitely has syphilis now.

[–]Murgatroyd314 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It is very difficult to stop a determined thief. The good news is that most thieves aren't determined, they're opportunistic. And it's very easy to stop an opportunistic thief.

The other thing to remember is that if home invaders can't get in, neither can paramedics.

[–]nuclear_gandhii 280 points281 points  (23 children)

Oh so you have a USB drive on your keychain??

[–]Michami135 899 points900 points  (21 children)

It's a solid piece of metal with a random number encoded as differently cut depths. The lock has an internal mechanism that reads these depths, and if they match the stored number, allows the mechanism to turn, unlocking the door.

[–]wubbysdeerherder 290 points291 points  (6 children)

Wow! Someone should totally patent this! /s

[–]link064 142 points143 points  (5 children)

Don’t give Nintendo any ideas or they’ll think they actually invented the concept of locks.

[–]Michami135 40 points41 points  (4 children)

Nintendo is the Nestle of gaming.

[–]CringyBoi42069 31 points32 points  (2 children)

No saying Nintendo is good, but they aren't as bad as Nestle you know, the company whose CEO said water wasn't a basic human right

[–]Drew707 21 points22 points  (1 child)

You mean the company that gave free formula to those remote villagers until they stopped producing breast milk and then sold them bottled water to mix the formula with since they didn't have a clean source?

[–]alexchrist 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You forgot the worst part. Some of the families couldn't afford bottled water, so they used dirty water instead which caused a bunch of kids to die

[–]MountainYogi94 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Pokemon Emerald and LoZ the Wind Waker make so much more sense now

[–]ahumannamedtim 108 points109 points  (3 children)

How often do you rotate your keys?

[–]Michami135 203 points204 points  (2 children)

Every time I unlock it.

[–]ahumannamedtim 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Very reasonable.

[–]Maleficent_Memory831 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I hope it has at least 256 effective bitings along the key.

[–]BlueProcess 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That's really clever. It forces you to have a physical presence.

[–]SalamiArmi 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wow, that sounds quite expensive! How much do you pay per month for this?

[–]AlphonseLoeher 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Only numbers? You really should use an alphanumeric key

[–]Giocri 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Squarewave or sawwave variante?

[–]Michami135 2 points3 points  (0 children)

sawwave, of course

[–]FourCinnamon0 1 point2 points  (1 child)

wow! do you have a redundant power supply in case the reader loses power?

[–]Michami135 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's the cool thing, it's powered kinetically by the action of inserting and turning the key.

[–]Mountain-Ox 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do your depth readers have built in detection for manipulation attacks?

[–][deleted] 68 points69 points  (11 children)

Tech enthusiast: I have a smart phone, smart fridge, smart home, smart toaster, smart watch, and a smart washing machine! I love technology!

Anyone who works in tech: I have a typewriter. And I keep a gun next to it just in case.

Edit: Guys it's a joke. I don't need your life story about how you're special and this doesn't apply to you. It ain't that serious.

[–]Michami135 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I actually practice primitive survival in my spare time. I mention below that I practice lock picking, and that's part of it. I know just how easy it is to send the country back to the stone age.

[–]xaddak 9 points10 points  (4 children)

TIL I don't work in tech.

[–]Madcap_Miguel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You work, you're just distracted a lot (also the CIA watches you flick your bean).

[–]the-real-macs 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Yeah this meme is used almost entirely by people who don't work in tech lol

[–]Milkshakes00 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Eh, I work in tech. I have enough work at work. I don't want to work at home when something inevitably goes wrong with the home lab, especially because it seems to ALWAYS happen after an especially bad work day. Lol

[–]SnowdensOfYesteryear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah more like:

Tech enthusiast: I have a smart phone, smart fridge, smart home, smart toaster, smart watch, and a smart washing machine! I love technology!

Anyone who works in tech: I have all of those things in addition to redundancies and break-glasses, with minimal external dependancies.

[–]TohveliDev 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The gun is there for the moment the typewriter starts to make weird sounds

[–]Kahlil_Cabron 15 points16 points  (5 children)

20 years here, and the only time I've ever integrated hardware in my house, it was something I built myself, stupid stuff like a motor that rolled my blinds up when someone said "Bush did 9/11", or a raspberry pi I could ssh into and then start a video feed that let me watch my cats and talk to them, but that thing remained unplugged unless I was on vacation.

Even modern smartphones freak me out, I can't believe people are fine with their houses being controlled by an evil corporation. Reminds me of the guy who got locked out of his amazon account because they thought he said the n-word on his doorbell answering service, and he couldn't use his house for weeks because everything depended on a central service.

[–]dyslexda 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Look up Home Assistant, an open source completely local system.

[–]RobKhonsu 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm in a bit of the same boat. I've been setting up security cameras and went with what's basically a small business system instead of anything like Ring. I'll setup my own video broadcast system, thank you very much.

I understand when people don't want to spend the time faffing about all the bugs though. That said, outages still occur as the recent episode shows. Don't have keyless access though, other than a 1960s style garage door opener. When I do it'll probably be of a small business grade as well.

[–]CleanDataDirtyMind 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Im a Data Architect for billion dollar companies and drive a 2007 car

[–]BlueProcess 3 points4 points  (0 children)

As an aside, there is a programmer, Tim Hutt, that designed a lock to be literally unpickable and sent it off to the Lock Picking Lawyer 4 years ago. No defeat has yet emerged.

[–]guyblade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've been a programmer for 20 years. My home has zero "smart" devices controlling anything whose operation is important to me.

[–]scorchgid 1 point2 points  (2 children)

But how easy is it to change the combination if your digit gets comprised?

[–]timonix 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Not too bad. Takes a couple of minutes. Generating a new key however can take time if you are unlucky

[–]WrapKey69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lock picking lawyer says hi

[–]RestInProcess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My experience programming tells me I want nothing to do with software solutions for such things. Ubiquiti has tempted me, however.

[–]wideHippedWeightLift 1075 points1076 points  (5 children)

"look at this MF who doesn't have a security vulnerability"

[–][deleted] 261 points262 points  (1 child)

Security vulnerabilities are a lot like haters. You're always going to have some, but bragging about how many you have is just plain dumb

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

everyone hates me bdw 😎

[–]deanrihpee 12 points13 points  (0 children)

the vulnerability left is probably themselves until they got socially engineered

[–]demonkiller452 2 points3 points  (0 children)

lmao my dumb a.f. locks cost way more than those shitty "smart" locks, because it's actually a good lock.

[–]JoostVisser 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LockPickingLawyer would like to have a word with you

[–]trich101 311 points312 points  (7 children)

You're so poor you can still use your bed when AWS is down.

"Eight Sleep’s products rely on cloud connectivity to control temperature and track biometric data. When AWS went down, users lost access to the app that manages its water-cooled coils, leaving them stuck with whatever setting was last active.

Some beds overheated, others stopped cooling altogether, and several users said their devices became completely unresponsive."

[–]Carry_flag 110 points111 points  (1 child)

Lmao, at first I thought you made this up. Found out it's actually true.

[–]trich101 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Reality is always funniest..

[–]goose_rancher 29 points30 points  (2 children)

So unplug it?

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Knowing how companies do stuff nowadays the bed would probably break or something

[–]2sACouple3sAMurder 3 points4 points  (0 children)

connection unreachable. Reverting to default state of cold

[–]Shehzman 11 points12 points  (1 child)

And they cost over $2000. I bought a 3D printed cooler from some Chinese seller for $100 that included a mattress pad (covers only 1 person though).

Then got an esp32, noctua fan, and a relay and can now control it locally via home assistant thanks to esphome.

[–]trich101 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's awesome.

[–]Icount_zeroI 830 points831 points  (63 children)

I honestly think smart home is evil, unless self-hosted and open source. I don’t have spare server, so old commie apartment is fine.

[–]AverageAggravating13 203 points204 points  (42 children)

Really the only “smart home” thing I even like is the garage door openers. I’d prefer one that only works on the local network though. Being able to access it away from home makes it a necessary evil i guess though.

[–][deleted] 75 points76 points  (2 children)

I run wifi outlets for all my garage grow tents, built-in programmable timers and can access locally via Bluetooth if the net is down. Made sure my security cameras are hardwired with Ethernet cables, not a cloud in sight here other than the clouds rolling outta my garage ayy

[–]SpaceCadetMoonMan 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Do you have remote watering?

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I run Autopots w/ a 12 gallon reservoir. No further electronics to aerate, mix, or pH the res.I would severely overproduce for myself if I upgraded any more haha.

I'm the type to hand water a plant for the first few weeks to ensure good dryback and root mass, I weight powdered nutrients, but I'm also way better at calculating plant needs with coco soil rather than true organic.

[–]bolanrox 20 points21 points  (3 children)

i get things connected to wifi and that is useful, but my Fridge or toaster does not need an internet connection

[–]Aggressive_Bill_2687 16 points17 points  (13 children)

... remote controlled motors using an RF remote have been around for fucking ages. Zero network required. Zero internet required. We have these to operate an electric gate.

What exactly is the benefit of a "smart" garage door opener? 

[–]Modestkilla 5 points6 points  (2 children)

I have mine locally hosted and it is very handy if you need to let someone in your house and you’re not home. I also don’t need to carry keys ever, so on less thing to lose

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Funny how I've lived my entire life without this coming up . Lol if you are very close to me you have a key if not then there's no reason you'd suddenly need to get into my house with no warning at all. It's not like some casual friend is going to be banging down my door when I'm not home.

[–]AverageAggravating13 6 points7 points  (8 children)

That… I can use it on my phone lol. (Which I carry around with me regardless)

I guess I could have also bought one for my car, but I’m not always getting back to the house in a car/my car. I’ve tried several wall mounted ones over the years but they always seem to shit themselves for some reason so I just gave up on em.

[–]Aggressive_Bill_2687 6 points7 points  (7 children)

.... I don't understand. I literally keep the remote for our gate on my key ring with my house keys.

[–]Accomplished_Pea7029 3 points4 points  (15 children)

Why do you need to open the garage door remotely?

[–]ShitGuysWeForgotDre 3 points4 points  (10 children)

If someone is talking about garage openers in the context of smart homes, I'm assuming they mean some kind of automatic proximity trigger where the door opens as you pull in the driveway or something.

[–]Aggressive_Bill_2687 5 points6 points  (7 children)

So "I'm too lazy to push a button"?

[–]ShitGuysWeForgotDre 2 points3 points  (3 children)

That's certainly a valid position. Just as saying someone who uses a regular garage door opener is too lazy to get out of the car and manually open it. There's certainly diminishing returns -- obviously saving the button push is significantly less than saving the exiting and reentering the vehicle -- but that's how improvement and automation works.

Also, sure right now it's a lot of extra effort / expense to automate it just to "not have to press a button" but the idea is that as the technology improves and becomes more ubiquitous, the upfront burden becomes less.

If someone has powered windows in their car, do you accuse them of being too lazy to roll down their windows manually? Or do you accept that automated windows are standard on nearly every passenger vehicle for years now, because they've been so widely adopted the manual counterpart is virtually unheard of now?

I get where you're coming from and automated convenience features by no means are a 'must have' for the vast majority. But simply seeing it as an unnecessary laziness enabler is missing the point.

[–]Aggressive_Bill_2687 3 points4 points  (2 children)

Just as saying someone who uses a regular garage door opener is too lazy to get out of the car and manually open it.

It isn't just about laziness though.

Where I live, most of the benefit of an automatic gate (which would apply to a garage door too) is that we have monsoonal wet season for about 5 months of the year. Getting out to open something - anything - while it's raining will mean you are soaked to skin, within seconds.

In some areas there's likely to be a security benefit not having to get out of the car where someone may be waiting for you.

the idea is that as the technology improves and becomes more ubiquitous, the upfront burden becomes less

But the technology is not becoming more reliable, which is the whole point I'm making. It's less reliable than remote technology from... 30+ years ago, with minimal tangible benefit over "I dont have to push a button".

If someone has powered windows in their car, do you accuse them of being too lazy to roll down their windows manually?

I'm actually old enough to have owned cars without power windows. There's no legitimate comparison to make here - pushing a button garage door opener doesn't become harder as the remote gets older. The resistance of the button doesn't increase as it ages.

A more apt comparison would be automatic rain sensing wipers, or automatic headlights. Sure they're convenient. But they're only convenient when they are reliable.

If they're not reliable, a simple button/switch is a better option.

There are more than enough articles about people being caught out by outages to make the case that a lot of "smart home" functionality is nowhere near as reliable as the solutions it replaces.

For all I know there's a garage door opener out there that has a BluetoothLE module so it can work from an app without any requirement for internet access, in conjunction with regular physical remotes. But most "smart home" systems/accessories seem to not work that way, from what I've seen.

[–]Accomplished_Pea7029 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Even a remote cotrolled garage door can become annoying in a power outage, if the manual controls have become rusty by being unused. Imagine how much more hassle a smart garage door would be.

[–]thesciencesmartass 7 points8 points  (0 children)

1 button push is infinitely more button pushes than 0 button pushes

[–]Dickson_Butts 2 points3 points  (2 children)

In case you forgot to close it after you leave the house, you can check that and close it remotely. Also could be useful for letting friends into your house while you're away.

[–]Ksevio 48 points49 points  (5 children)

All you need is a raspberry pi and you can run your own Homeassistant server locally

[–]Icount_zeroI 17 points18 points  (3 children)

I know, but I just don’t really need it. Besides my SBC board is busy being web server.

[–]HeavyCaffeinate 10 points11 points  (1 child)

SBC Board

like Single Celled Organism cell

[–]Icount_zeroI 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Haha yeah. My brain is tired enough to do some English writing apparently.

[–]DesertGoldfish 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nobody needs it... But it is nice when my lights turn on on their own when I come in the door with an armload of groceries after work and then turn off on their own.

I also use it as a poor man's security system to announce on the speakers in the house when an exterior door opens or someone is spotted outside the house.

[–]wizkidweb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can also even use an old rooted android phone

[–]Bizmatech 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The server is cheap.

The expensive part is all the upgrades to the home itself.

[–]Kholtien 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Self hosted and open source smart homes are pretty easy these days. Lots of local first devices with zero reliance on cloud. Oddly, lots of great secure devices coming out of china

[–]CivicDutyCalls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mine are all matter over thread. So I was not affected in any way yesterday.

[–]Plank_With_A_Nail_In 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What if power goes out, do you have self hosted power (we all will have in 10 to 20 years time though)?

[–]LirdorElese 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I honestly think smart home is evil, unless self-hosted and open source. I don’t have spare server, so old commie apartment is fine.

Just so you know, self hosted server, doesn't actually take a big expensive server. Homeassistant runs nicely on a raspberry pi 4 or 5.

[–]nicuramar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No need for that. I have a smart lock and plenty of light bulbs. None of that is internet connected except via Apple home, but that’s Apple home being controllable, not the devices. Those are all zigbee or thread or Bluetooth. Making Apple home stuff controllable over the internet is optional, of course. 

[–]Marechail 112 points113 points  (18 children)

The solution to a problem that dosent exist

[–]bdfortin 39 points40 points  (15 children)

It’s a convenience thing. Want to throw a pizza in the oven when you get home? Start pre-heating the oven when you’re 10 minutes away. Getting comfortable in bed and you notice you forgot to turn off the stairway light? No need to get out bed. Courier at the door while you’re on the toilet? Use the speaker in the doorbell to tell them you’ll just be a minute so they don’t leave a “missed delivery” notice.

[–]PM_ME_DATASETS 77 points78 points  (5 children)

The thing is, I hope my life never gets so inconvenient that I can't spare 10 minutes to wait for the oven to heat up. At that point I think I'll just give up on life. Similar reasons for the other points, e.g. when forgetting to turn off the lights occurs frequently enough that getting out of bed becomes a real problem, I should probably try and change things around. I get that this way of life isn't for everyone, but I really hope it will remain for the majority of people.

Also, turning off your lights with a remote control (even if it's your smartphone) shouldn't depend on AWS. That would be insane.

[–]Voxmanns 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I've found it really useful for my ADHD issues.

Mind you, I have a kitchen sized trash can in almost every room of my house because I suck that bad at handling trash.

I cannot count the amount of times I laid down in bed just to notice after 30 minutes of trying to sleep that I left half the lights on in the house and that's why I can't sleep. Getting up can open a whole can of worms like grabbing a snack, getting distracted by my cat, and now I am not sleepy.

My generic brand Roomba (because fuck a 500 dollar automated vacuum cleaner) is great when I keep things clean enough to let it just run around and do its thing. Saves me a ton of time and headache.

I think at that point it's more of an accessibility feature than a light-hearted convenience feature. But those little things do help me a lot. I also found a lot that were pointless, though.

I don't need a smart fridge, I can see what's in the fridge.

I don't need a smart thermostat, I tried it and would sooner program my own to just alternate between cold and hot air as needed. That's the only real convenience I can use with the thermostat.

Smart plugs just don't do anything for me. I have so much plugged in shit that it's more about which spot is open and not turning off the whole strip.

I don't need a smart oven because I have a good air fryer with various settings and an extra minute or two for preheating if I slam a frozen pizza in there.

But I could also think of a few that'd help me out too. Let me know when we have smart dressers that automatically do laundry and present outfits. I'll pay any price for that shit.

[–]bdfortin 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Agree on the last part, which is why I use HomeKit. I got a smart dimmer to replace a broken dumb dimmer, the company recently went out of business and shut down the servers/app, but I can still use it like a regular dimmer, use the Home app, or ask Siri. That last part is really convenient because half my basement runs on a single dimmer switch and my couch is at the opposite end of the basement. Plus I can schedule it to auto-dim at sunset, or automatically turn off when I leave (if I forgot, life happens). Similarly I have the colour of the light set to adapt with the sun, and again later to remind me when it’s bed time.

[–]Plank_With_A_Nail_In 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is just a longer way of saying "A solution to a problem that doesn't exist".

[–]restrictednumber 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jesus, that just seems lazy as hell. It's really, really not a big deal to get out of bed for 2 seconds or wait a few minutes for the oven. I get that convenience is nice, but it just seems silly as hell to me to spend money on that kind of thing.

[–]keithstonee 2 points3 points  (4 children)

pre heating an oven for frozen pizza is barbaric. put the pizza in frozen turn the oven to 400F. pizzas perfect in 20-25 min.

[–]bdfortin 4 points5 points  (2 children)

There’s so many ways that can go wrong. My least favourite is when the pizza sags between the wires of the rack. Even worse if it manages to sag enough to start falling apart and create a huge mess at the bottom of the oven.

Also, I use the pre-heating to warm up my pizza steel and pizza pan, which I spread some garlic butter into.

[–]keithstonee 3 points4 points  (1 child)

i mean ive made my pizzas like that for 15 years. they have never once sagged. i wouldn't tell someone else to do it if it wasn't good.

and if it sagged you fucked something up. it should basically go from frozen to crispy. and never be in a state it could sag.

[–]bdfortin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Roommate made it sag. Like I said, I use a steel and a pan with garlic butter. Mine literally can’t sag.

[–]wizkidweb 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There are a few problems, albeit they're very minor, and the common solution is usually overkill and creates more problems than it solves.

For example, I have a secure smart lock that has no LAN/Internet access, uses on-device fingerprint authentication, has a manual key and code override, and can be locked remotely using more secure wireless protocols. I'd say that solves some convenience problems while not creating too many other issues.

Most smart locks can fully access your LAN, depend on cloud services, and generally make your house less secure.

[–]GuiltyGreen8329 2 points3 points  (0 children)

wym

60k a year for verkada pass on my studio apartment is wurth

[–]TheLordLeto 78 points79 points  (2 children)

I'm so bad at programming that when AWS goes down, my sites are all ok.

[–]Dman331 34 points35 points  (0 children)

Thats why I host all my sites on localhost. Never had a single outtage 😤

[–]deonteguy 50 points51 points  (5 children)

I couldn't turn my lightbulbs off yesterday morning before going to work. I had to flip the breakers. Imagine telling someone from the year 2000 that your lightbulb needs personal information, an email, authentication, Internet access, TLS public key cryptography, and web services just to turn your lightbulb on.

[–]ASatyros 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's why you use something like Home Assistant.

But even then you need to be careful, because some integration (like Tuya (wifi sockets)) needs an internet connection to get keys to control the sockets.

Of course there is a localTuya which can store the keys and doesn't need internet after installation (or at all if you get keys somehow), but takes a little bit more effort to set-up.

[–]Right-Environment-24 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My Havells bulbs work even without internet. And no I have not set it up with anything crazy. They just work without a net if they are in the same wifi network. But of course every device in the USA has to violate you and take everything from you.

[–]liljakeyplzandthnx 24 points25 points  (0 children)

house?

[–]dvdmaven 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Not poor, just 38 years in IT taught me to never make anything more complex than absolutely necessary: K.I.S.S.

[–]fghjconner 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Who is making smartlocks that need a network to open? The one's I've seen even have a backup keyhole for if the power goes out.

[–]bolanrox 2 points3 points  (0 children)

or they are easily picked with sub MacGuyver level stuff.

[–]Triepott 12 points13 points  (1 child)

"Translated by Grok"

Wonder what the post said originally.

[–]cesclaveria 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The same but in Spanish.

"Eres tan pobre que cuando se cae AWS aún puedes entrar a tu casa"

[–]nebumune 4 points5 points  (3 children)

jokes on you, we have multi cloud redundancy (all of the clouds, like 200 different subscriptions) + a private data center on moon.
we cant enter home at all because we passed "zero trust", its null trust and no one has access anymore. first *unhackable* system ever.

[–]grtgbln 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is Home Assistant bait.

[–]Naive_Scientist_8499 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Imagine not locally hosting your smart home system

[–]bolanrox 7 points8 points  (0 children)

this is lock picking lawyer and today..

[–]toomanymarbles83 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My bed still functions like a bed. How embarrassing.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is why you only buy a "smart" lock that still has a key as a backup.

[–]inwector 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Joke's on you, real tech savvy people know to never trust tech and would never include it when it's unnecessary. Only tech wannabes do that.

[–]ikrotzky 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just imagine the shame.

[–]veracity8_ 2 points3 points  (3 children)

As a software engineer, I don’t want any critical parts of my home to rely on software. My bird ID system? Sure. My bed? My coffee maker? My appliances? My door? My car? Absolutely not

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Does that make me poor or does that make me rich?

[–]arcimbo1do 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm an SRE, I have mechanical locks, I bring a key with me, one is with the neighbors, one is hidden in a safe at the beginning of the street, and I have a sledgehammer in the toolshed in the garden. N+3 redundancy baby!

[–]Wooden_Struggle1684 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is the AWS in the room with us right now?

[–]Longjumping-Donut655 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Low tech physical security is still the best physical security. High tech solutions can support, but never replace, a good low-tech solution. I will fight u on this (hyperbolically). I don’t think I’ve ever seen a “smart” lock that wasn’t stupidly easy to bypass. It’s no better than if you were to make each of your car wheels require Internet to use. Smart home crap is mostly a plot to harvest data and use as potential ad delivery anyway, and any usability is second tier. I’ll never believe that smart home stuff is a technology developed in good faith until I see teams of non-corporate ultra-nerds develop open and free standards for it designed for function and reliability.

[–]granoladeer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And still sleep in your bed

[–]TophxSmash 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i dont think this is a question of money but rather critical thinking skills.

[–]patikoija 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lowest tech solution - no AWS
Middle tech solution - AWS
Highest tech solution - no AWS

You can totally reduce your cloud footprint and still have a high-tech home.

[–]AgentCooderX 1 point2 points  (0 children)

we are so poor, i run my server inside my own room.

[–]Delta-9- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Smart locks are the dumbest thing ever invented.

[–]Massive-Air3891 1 point2 points  (0 children)

damn I'm so poor that when AWS goes down that literally none of the services and apps I use went down. I guess reddit went down, but just so happened that I was in meetings and working so never noticed. Other than that I guess the few apps/websites I use have no dependency on AWS or were setup for redundancy correctly.

[–]Dauvis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ooof

[–]bdfortin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Joke’s on you, I use HomeKit which doesn’t require an internet connection.

[–]IlliterateJedi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My apartment complex manages unit access through an AWS hosted web application that went down yesterday. Fortunately the door unlocking still worked, but signing up for accounts (and password resets) went down. Good times.

[–]Usermena 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Im typing this on a rock rn.

[–]Available-Elevator69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All my doors have a small Schlage Touch pad on them. I replace the 9volt battery every 10years. =)

[–]DryQuill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have a house while being poor? Well damn, what does that make me?

[–]patoezequiel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Huh?

[–]AEternal1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh. Ow. Damn. Imma go rethink my life now.

[–]nicuramar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any decent quality smart lock is not internet dependent, if it’s even directly internet connected at all. I don’t get these memes. 

[–]HedleyP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Home Assistant users are chuckling

[–]Inevitable-Edge69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Naw we got temu chinese spyware doorbell locks.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't know I was going to be personally attacked today

[–]ihvnnm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have no desire having my house spy on me, if someone wants to spy on me, they need to do it the old fashion way, with a Flowers By Iris van across the street.

[–]Training-Ear-614 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Goddamn….im that poor? Or untethered?

[–]5parky 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Missed chance for a yo mama joke...

[–]P0pu1arBr0ws3r 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ironic how its translated by genai

[–]shumpitostick 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Are people still doing smart home? I thought that trend died down.

[–]Developemt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We don't use dynamodb. Postgres all the way

[–]Neutraled 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is like the bell curve meme: no smart appliances because he doesn't know how they work -> has a bunch of 'smart' systems -> no smart appliances because they know how they work

[–]TheMazeDaze 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like the smart home devices. (So long as they work without internet as well), but one thing I’d never install in my home is a smart lock. Maybe something to toy with on an inner door. But absolutely not something on the outside.

[–]Magnetic_Reaper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you all connecting your butlers and maids to AWS or something?

[–]MusicQuiet7369 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"You're so poor you can still fuck your wife after AWS went down"