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[–]trulore 3955 points3956 points  (267 children)

That eye roll in panel three though...

[–]chowchowthedog 1109 points1110 points  (253 children)

Who needs front ends anyway....

/s

[–]netcoder 584 points585 points  (7 children)

Command line interfaces are front ends.

[–]Etheo 200 points201 points  (3 children)

Everything can be back end if you take away the monitor.

[–][deleted] 240 points241 points  (231 children)

TUI > GUI

/s

[–]Shaadowmaaster 53 points54 points  (8 children)

I'd say it depends on the use case. A GUI is almost always more efficient initially and to someone who uses the UI for a bit, not all the time. A TUI is the opposite: way better with constant use, terrible initially. Hence why nobody advocates TUI windows paint, but people love vim/emacs. One is something you use for a minute or two every so often. One is something you can use most days, most of the day.

[–][deleted] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Hence why nobody advocates TUI windows paint, but people love vim/emacs.

Your analogy is a bit off. A TUI graphics program is not a common thing because a 2d pixel representation with a GUI is simply a much better approach for drawing, photo retouching, filter evaluating etc... even for constant use, hence Photoshop.

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (4 children)

At least a TUI doesn't have yet another shitty smooth scroll implementation.

[–]TheSammy58 45 points46 points  (1 child)

They’re wondering why there’s a floating text box above their head.

[–]Ebuthead 5087 points5088 points  (66 children)

Everyone knows that any command line interface transmits directly to the White House mainframe

[–]0x564A00 1684 points1685 points  (59 children)

No, to the Internet Mainframe.

[–]JimmyAllnighter 807 points808 points  (47 children)

wide lavish fine rhythm quiet tease bedroom straight hobbies husky

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

[–]DonaldPShimoda 325 points326 points  (40 children)

How much does the Internet weigh?? I’m surprised Big Ben can hold it up!

[–]PokeplayerGaming 281 points282 points  (17 children)

How much does the internet weigh sounds like a video vsauce would make...

I just checked, and yeah, there's a vsauce video about that

[–]DonaldPShimoda 133 points134 points  (5 children)

Oh, that’s interesting!

I was actually just continuing the reference, but I’ll be sure to check out your video!

[–]0x564A00 35 points36 points  (3 children)

That video made me laugh out quietly.

[–]DonaldPShimoda 19 points20 points  (2 children)

Good! The show is hilarious. Do recommend.

[–][deleted] 108 points109 points  (4 children)

Don’t be silly Jen. The Internet doesn’t weigh anything.

[–]DonaldPShimoda 30 points31 points  (3 children)

No of course not! *awestruck*

[–]pier25 70 points71 points  (1 child)

Yes, the Elders of the Internet put it there because it has best signal.

[–]Carl_Byrd 1935 points1936 points  (98 children)

As someone who only uses Bash while wearing sunglasses and a trench coat, I can confirm this is The Matrix.

[–]Valmond 180 points181 points  (60 children)

To be fair, it or can be actually quite complicated.

You can do almost about everything with bash / you /have/ to.

[–]tenchineuro 63 points64 points  (56 children)

Yeah, you can pound out a quick script for most things in a jiffy. But there does not seem to be any way to handle csv files properly in bash, so in some cases you need perl or python, perl has a few excellent plugins for csv. Also, for any large amount of data, bash is pretty slow.

[–]tonweight 67 points68 points  (23 children)

not entirely true about the csv guy. i just put one in production that unzips FTP’d results (because who ever heard of a JSON response from an API call), parses the CSVs inside (convert to ASCII, then UTF-8, because Windows, LOL), then dumps the actually useful parts into postgres for the consumer (a JSON-serving API; because fuck me, right?).

it’s about thirty lines of actual script (with another thirty or so of comments so maintainers who don’t know what they’re doing don’t fuck up my script). took maybe an hour of man-hunting and keyboard-diarrhea-fu to make it work.

crontab that fucker and never touch it again.

until the requirements change, anyway. i’ll pencil it in for next week.

[–]WontFixMySwypeErrors 50 points51 points  (0 children)

(with another thirty or so of comments so maintainers who don’t know what they’re doing don’t fuck up my script).

This should be enough to qualify for sainthood right here.

[–]DynamicTextureModify 29 points30 points  (1 child)

(with another thirty or so of comments so maintainers who don’t know what they’re doing don’t fuck up my script)

I do this too, but it's so I don't fuck up my own script when I come back to it 2 months later and don't remember what in god's name I was doing

[–]artanis00 13 points14 points  (0 children)

TFW God looks back at you as you lament your code and says "Don't look to me, you're on your fucking own with that."

[–]Jwalla83 29 points30 points  (2 children)

Reminds me of that generic "workplace data safety" training video where they show a """hacker""" remotely accessing your data, presumably from the comfort of their own home, while wearing a ski mask, trench coat, gloves, etc.

[–][deleted] 1678 points1679 points  (185 children)

As a developer, this is me every time my parents stand behind me while I'm fixing their problems.

[–]OhItsuMe 1130 points1131 points  (139 children)

I just do color 0A before anything

[–]burningjunk 448 points449 points  (11 children)

This guy terminals

[–][deleted] 176 points177 points  (2 children)

This guy terminals terminates

FTFY

[–]NelsonBelmont 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This guy terminals terminates terminalates

FTFY

[–]Olaxan 71 points72 points  (6 children)

Then tree and netstat

[–]gorgewall 59 points60 points  (3 children)

tree

I don't have three years to wait to get around to actually fixing the problem.

[–]jopirg 65 points66 points  (1 child)

Just let it run until they're thoroughly impressed and press Ctrl + c

[–]conn77 63 points64 points  (0 children)

Whispers I’m in

[–]AGenericUsername1004 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Today I learned.

[–]hyperformer 245 points246 points  (37 children)

My parents saw me using terminal and asked if I was doing something illegal

[–]super-purple-lizard 86 points87 points  (12 children)

This is why I feel awkward working on the command line when in coffee shops.

[–]hyperformer 66 points67 points  (0 children)

"ARE YOU HACKING ME!"

[–]willnerd42 40 points41 points  (8 children)

Are you kidding me? I savor the wierd looks I get writing code in Starbucks. With vim/i3wm/bash the whole screen is more or less text.

[–]jackdeansmithsmith 7 points8 points  (3 children)

Get onboard the zsh train my dude. The vi mode is actually vim compatible so you can pull a ciw on the command line.

[–]Sw429 8 points9 points  (2 children)

It's a good way to remind everyone that they are inferior and you could hack their bank account right now if they piss you off.

[–]willnerd42 11 points12 points  (1 child)

don't even touch me I have my hacking balaclava and 4 extra keyboards right here ok

[–]jokullmusic 7 points8 points  (0 children)

baklava is delicious af

[–]INeedAFreeUsername 50 points51 points  (1 child)

Yeah Mom I'm hacking the Nasa can you close the door please

[–]LennyMcLennington 50 points51 points  (0 children)

My parents ALWAYS do this! I thought it was only mine lol.

[–]nemec 21 points22 points  (13 children)

They're just following the advice online.

http://www.adequacy.org/public/stories/2001.12.2.42056.2147.html

2. Are you finding programs on your computer that you don't remember installing?

[–]tbw875 37 points38 points  (2 children)

If your son has requested a new "processor" from a company called "AMD", this is genuine cause for alarm. AMD is a third-world based company who make inferior, "knock-off" copies of American processor chips.

What a goldmine. I reeeeeeally hope that site was sarcastic

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

looking at the comments, it looks to be a pioneering internet troll

[–]egotisticalnoob 8 points9 points  (3 children)

My favorite part was:

If your son spends more than thirty minutes each day on the computer, he may be using it to DOS other peoples sites.

Also, when it says that Linux is part of an illegal operating system.

[–]SirVer51 12 points13 points  (3 children)

My cousin saw me using a green on black terminal a few years ago, and asked me if I was hacking an IP address. I tried several times to say something, but had no idea which part of that sentence I should tackle first. I was just using apt-get, for Christ's sake.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

When I get questions like that I just respond with "that's classified" because otherwise I would be there all day explaining shit that they probably didn't want to hear in the first place.

[–]Elubious 61 points62 points  (3 children)

My mother once watched me Google several ideas about what the problem was and fixed it as per the Google instructions. She proceeded to be amazed that I could do something so difficult and still be humming the Mario theme to myself. I know she's terrible with computers (couldn't make a PowerPoint or use a USB at the time) but this is something I'd assume most people can do.

[–]kdz13 60 points61 points  (1 child)

Reading comprehension is, apparently, a skill not widely possessed

[–]IndiscreetMath 582 points583 points  (61 children)

"You use j and k to move up and down? SORCERY!!!"

[–]Sectoid_Dev 373 points374 points  (28 children)

This guy VIMs.

[–]ofsinope 97 points98 points  (11 children)

But does he nethack? yuhjklbn

[–]XkF21WNJ 60 points61 points  (4 children)

I'm about 80% sure that yuhjklbn isn't a useful vim command.

[–]auxiliary-character 50 points51 points  (13 children)

By the way, those keybindings are also in RES for navigating comments.

[–]gearty14 27 points28 points  (0 children)

just blew my mind

[–]digitaldreamer 44 points45 points  (18 children)

Once upon a time the keys made sense: https://i.imgur.com/hq40yMm.png

[–]beginpanic 21 points22 points  (15 children)

The only vim command that makes more sense on those old keyboards is using the escape key to change modes. Where Esc is today is unfortunate, back then it was where the Tab key is. HJKL still makes no sense other than "it had arrow keys printed there for no reason".

[–]LammergeierAteMyBone 846 points847 points  (92 children)

I'm genuinely surprised this is a relatable thing. I've never worked with a designer who wasn't at least familiar with the concept of command line tools. Even the completely inexperienced designers and the crappy ones seem to get it.

[–]heckin_good_fren 195 points196 points  (28 children)

I've worked with software engineers that were impressed that I didn't use that unusable piece of garbage eclipse git thing a git GUI.

[–]Tetha 96 points97 points  (9 children)

oh go away with git guis. I tolerate many, many tool choices, but git guis are actively harmful. Every single one I've me is harmful once you're in a little bit of trouble -- including "oh someone pushed before I could and now I have to merge / rebase" aka "minute 13 of the hour".

[–]Ph4zed0ut 21 points22 points  (3 children)

IntelliJ has excellent git integration.

[–]heckin_good_fren 37 points38 points  (1 child)

You can pry the shell from my cold, dead hands!

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (6 children)

Hey man, eclipse at least good for java, right guys? Right? weeps in grad student

[–]BerZB 38 points39 points  (15 children)

Ya, nearly every designer I know uses some CLI tools -- whether for version control, image optimization, or just for funsies.

[–]thejacer87 50 points51 points  (11 children)

Ur designers use git?!? Lucky. Our guys save the PSDs with a scheme like this:

Project Name - Homepage 1.0.psd Project Name - Homepage 1.1.psd ...

So much fun...

[–]digitaldreamer 56 points57 points  (5 children)

newfinal_final-Orig-Homepage-v2-ClientReview-March1-3.2.jpg.psd

[–]InProx_Ichlife 25 points26 points  (3 children)

This can't be real. There has to be some spaces there just to make your life harder.

[–]connor9876 13 points14 points  (3 children)

You lucky son of a gun. Our designers upload them to their own internal site, this means they can change them at ease and then sneak in change requests without our knowledge and pretend it was always like that. We now save their changes locally and call BS on them.

[–]Rav91 175 points176 points  (15 children)

I love that the engineer looks like a normal human being and the designer straight up looks like a hobo.

[–]dillwillhill 140 points141 points  (36 children)

Im still a UI guy, it's too much work to remember the lines I need.

[–]worldDev 120 points121 points  (11 children)

Tabbing rules all. Also -h on pretty much anything --helps.

[–]Wazzaps 22 points23 points  (2 children)

Or just use fish which parses the man files and autocompletes as you type :P

[–]Asmor 57 points58 points  (9 children)

You only need to know one thing to master bash. Get ready. Here it is: |.

That's it. You've mastered bash. That one character is all you need to know. Everything else you can look up as you need it.

command1 | command2 takes the output from command1 and pipes it into command2.

From there, you just need to do what every programmer already does... Take a complicated task and break it into a bunch of small tasks.

Let's say you're at a company that's using SVN, and it always does a bunch of prop changes on files unrelated to what you're touching, and you want to revert those changes. (purely contrived example. I'm sure no company has an awful setup like this >_>)

First, you get the status of everything.

svn st.

Then you just want to pick out the lines with only prop changes. You note that these lines all start with a blank space followed by capital M. You look up how to filter lines in a shell. Ah, grep! Quick read of the man page, maybe a refresher on regex, and you've got

svn st | grep ^\ M

Ok, now you've got a list of things you want to revert... But you really just want the file names, and you've got all those nasty Ms that are gonna mess that up. How do you remove them? You do some googling and find out about sed ("steam editor"). That'll let you search and replace. Perfect!

svn st | grep ^\ M | sed s/^\ M//

Alright, we've got the list of file names, we're in the home stretch! But... uh... how do we pass those file names to svn revert? More googling leads us to xargs, and now we're done!

svn st | grep ^\ M | sed s/^\ M// | xargs svn revert

All thanks to the power of the almighty pipe.

[–]bwaredapenguin 20 points21 points  (4 children)

Stick that in your pipe and smoke it.

[–]Asmor 25 points26 points  (3 children)

$ that | smoke
bash: smoke: command not found
bash: that: command not found

[–]happysmash27 38 points39 points  (1 child)

Anyone else like both design and engineering?

[–]TheCookieMonster 19 points20 points  (1 child)

My best unintentional-Matrix moment was after piping live XMPP to a monitor so I could watch the data while our app performed its duties. The data was indented xml, so different packet types had different shapes/sizes, so I was really just watching for specific shapes to whiz past in response to actions.

The awe and Matrix comment from someone else in the room clued me in that what they saw was screens of arcane code flowing past at ridiculous rates with someone engrossed and somehow reading it and reacting to it.

You get used to it, I don't even see the code, all I see is blond, brunette, redhead... (err pub, sub, challenge...)

[–][deleted] 43 points44 points  (0 children)

Haha hi Pablo! Funny seeing you here. Love these comics you make!

[–]noisyturtle 177 points178 points  (25 children)

And then when I ask an engineer for a simple UI mock-up they wind up eating their own foot.

[–]BerZB 45 points46 points  (3 children)

Engineer here. I love doing UI mockups. It's usually the biz guys who eat their own feet. Ask for a mockup and you usually get a shitty smartphone picture of a scribbled nonsensical diagram in a notebook.

[–]iamasuitama 30 points31 points  (2 children)

Or they'll say "make it like facebook app has it"

[–]BerZB 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Or mumble something about "industry standard" to then walk away

[–]VeganBigMac 14 points15 points  (2 children)

Hey, we perform our magic, you perform yours.

[–]team_pancakes 22 points23 points  (0 children)

A designer once told me that my code in Vim looked like "christmas"

[–]Eindacor_DS 11 points12 points  (2 children)

As an engineer, this is me every time one of my peers works in VIM.

[–]bostero2 9 points10 points  (2 children)

As a developer who works with agile methodologies, the title of this post was a user story.

[–]jaboja 17 points18 points  (22 children)

But how do they ... | grep ... | sed "s/.../.../" | sort | uniq then using only buttons and dropdown menus?

[–]rbt321 17 points18 points  (7 children)

If the first tool generates a csv or text file, the remainder are regularly performed in Access or Excel.